Anything Wrong?

Teuton

Virgin
Joined
Apr 1, 2002
Posts
12
With my new gf. I'm having some trouble getting off.
Night One: Handjob for a while, and then like a 30mins bj WOW, some sex. = Blue Balls
Night Two: Sex (Missionary) for about 45 mins = Blue Balls
Night Three: Sex (Missionary/Doggy Style) 45mins = Blue Balls

She gets too tired from the sex, and is upset that she can't get me off, and that I last TOO long. Not to mention I was a virgin until Saturday. So I SHOULD be a little quicker. But due to years of masturbation, stamina has came. The first I hadn't whacked off for about 5 days. Then had to get rid of Blue Balls afterwards though. But still 45 mins of sex SHOULD do it for a virgin.
 
Huh?

So it's your girlfriend's fault because you can't get off, eh? Nice trick. Let me know how you pulled off that little blame-game-switcheroo.
 
I'm sorry, but I don't see where he was blaming his girlfriend. It seems like he believes the problem is from too much masturbation.

Teuton, it seems like you may be putting too much emphasis on what 'should' happen instead of what is happening. Everyone is different, so more than likely the pressure of 'performing' is getting to you. Maybe you are subconciously afraid of getting this gal pregnant. Who knows for sure?

If she is open to it, maybe she should watch you masturbate so she can find out first hand the places that feel best for you. Try different positions to see which ones stimulate you the most. When she starts to get tired, then just relax and use that time to kiss and touch each other instead. If she is getting sore, then you might want to use some lube to help reduce some of the friction.

About the only other advice I can offer is to take it slow and have fun trying to figure out what will get you off with her. Good luck.
 
The only thing that I would add to what Bird's Wife says that you might want to try is this. Have her hold your cock, put your hand over hers and then masturbate.

That way she can follow the hand movements that you make, and do things like you do. Not to mention applying pressure in the right places at the right time.
 
Some people should be hung with a new rope!

When I was a young lad it would take me at least forty-five minutes to cum during any sex act.
The second round one hour and a half or more and only got longer as the night went on.

COUNT your blessings! it probably will not last your whole life.

If I may suggest this, start out with her giving you a hand job while you finger her. Have her start giving you a blow job and work it in to a sixty-nine. Go from there into some serious fucking in various positions.

If your still going strong, try for a piece of ass.:D

If that doesn't work, rest awhile, then start over again.
 
I have found that some guys...horny as they are...can go for a long long time. Sometimes my guy never comes....am I doing a bad job? Hell no...he writhes around like no other...but it takes him a long time. Other times its much faster. You did just start having sex...it isnt all that great at first. Just relax....dont focus on the act of coming. let your girl know there is NOThING wrong with what she is doing. Everyone is different...there is no written law that says a virgin male must come right away the first few times he has sex. Happy gizzing!
 
You've gotten some good advice here. I think you've somewhat nailed it yourself - getting used to masturbation to get yourself off. Some guys have to "learn" to get off through vaginal or oral sex. And some men rarely if ever get off from oral.

If you start to build this up in your mind, you may border on performance anxiety and that could lead to erection problems. Don't concentrate so much on an orgasm. Concentrate on pleasing your partner. If you've been engaging in sex for 30 mins, and you've not cum, take a break. Cuddle with your girl, give her some oral, make her cum again. Heck, grab a sandwich! Watch a movie together. Give both of you a break. "Blue balls" might be a bit painful, but it ain't gonna kill you if you simply stop for a while.

Then, after certain amount of time has passed, start over. See what happens. You might have to do this a few times to get your body to respond the way you want it to. In the meantime, I would cut out masturbating or severely lessen it.

You say your girl gets tired - what exactly is she tired of? I know for me, if I'm in one position too long it can become uncomfortable. If that's the case, try different positions. Personally, I can't imagine missionary for 45 mins! I'd be changing around after 10 - 15 mins! Try changing to doggy, or letting her be on top, or oral, or 69. Mix it up and she might experience less discomfort. If she gets dry, then sex can be downright painful to a woman! The skin feels like it's been rubbed raw. If this is what she's experiencing, then it truly is time for a break. Give her some oral or let her recuperate. Or you could try some lube - a little bit of KY or Astroglide or Wet should keep her comfortable.

You don't state if you are wearing a condom or not. If so, check the size. The first time I ever used a condom with my first b/f, he just kept going and going and going and going! Both of us were getting tired and frustrated because he wasn't cumming. Turned out, the condom was too small and had pressed up tightly against the head of his penis. The pressure against the tip was preventing him from having an orgasm. (Sort of like if a man has to pee and is trying to hold it in) Get a larger condom size, if you do wear a condom, or try putting in a drop or two of lube on the inside - that can help a lot!

Good luck to you - I can understand how frustrating this must be to both of you!
 
BirdsWife said:
I'm sorry, but I don't see where he was blaming his girlfriend. It seems like he believes the problem is from too much masturbation.

He blames his new gf in the first two lines of the message:

Anything Wrong?

With my new gf. I'm having some trouble getting off.


The post didn't say 'Anything wrong with me.' It said 'Anything wrong? With my new gf.' If he thought that the problem was with being too used to masterbation, as he does spend much time writing about, then why was the post asking if there was anything wrong with his gf?
 
Chuckwrox said:
He blames his new gf in the first two lines of the message:

Anything Wrong?

With my new gf. I'm having some trouble getting off.


The post didn't say 'Anything wrong with me.' It said 'Anything wrong? With my new gf.' If he thought that the problem was with being too used to masterbation, as he does spend much time writing about, then why was the post asking if there was anything wrong with his gf?

Hmm. I read it as, "Anything Wrong?" then "I'm having some trouble getting off with my new gf." He doesn't sound like a native English speaker.
 
DarlingNikki said:
Hmm. I read it as, "Anything Wrong?" then "I'm having some trouble getting off with my new gf."

That is how I interpreted it, too.

The guy does spend most of the post talking about his masturbation, stamina and recent virgin status. On top of that he says she is the one upset that she can't get him off, so taken as a whole I'd say that he's looking to see whether he is the problem, not her.
 
Naw, the subject title was just the name of the title.(Didn't think anyone would read into it as so. Sorry for the confusion) Was never meant to be used within the post.
Yes, she's the one upset. Me it'd be a bonus, but it's not really a big deal. She's unwilling to go on top in any position. Lazy girl. As of now she's too "shy" about me going down on her(damn, thing I wanna do most). Trust me, I've tried, even though she has given me a blowjob. What I wanna do is just please HER and make HER happy! What makes her happy is if I lasted 10 mins. I mean I would think she'd be pretty happy about the enudrance of the act. I'm physically attracted to her.

Let me know what you think of this option. Don't get off until we're together again, yet stimulate myself somewhat, and keep horny.
 
well a whole new box is opened if she isnt willing to try things and this is bothering her....

she doesnt sound secure enough to handle sex yet....
 
She's the one who initialized it. She's been wih 5 guys before. Just doesn't like doing work I guess. She is shy about me seeing her, I have no idea why though. Maybe next time, we'll have to make it a part of the foreplay. I'm hoping she gets more open about it though.
 
Teuton said:
She's the one who initialized it. She's been wih 5 guys before. Just doesn't like doing work I guess. She is shy about me seeing her, I have no idea why though. Maybe next time, we'll have to make it a part of the foreplay. I'm hoping she gets more open about it though.

You know...ever heard that saying, "Being a good lover takes practice"? I read over this thread, and the things you said about her...and no matter how many men she has been with, if they didn't teach her anything about sex and just wanted to get themselves off, then maybe she doesn't KNOW enough about the act to actually participate fully. And perhaps she knows that, deep down, but doesn't know how to bring it up...and so she lies there, hoping you will enjoy yourself. And not wanting you to see her could come from the same problem...perhaps she has never had that wonderful experience of a man completely worshipping her body and focusing entirely on HER pleasure. That simple adoration is a liberating thing that can change a woman's self-image more than you could possibly believe!

Maybe you are the man to do that. :) It sounds like you are quite patient, and more than willing to work through whatever needs to be done to make sex better. Right? Right. :)

So perhaps she needs that from you...a man who will take all that wonderful stamina as a gift. It gives you SO much time to focus on her, ease her into intercourse, praise her body and her movements...show her what you would like, experiment with her, rave about how much you can learn together...and slowly pull her out of the shell she's in. Light candles in the room so that you can look at her, and touch each part of her lovely body...then tell her exactly how beautiful she is, how she makes you feel, and how much you want her. You cannot give too much praise, as long as that praise is honest.

Perhaps once she is more into the act, you will be able to relax more...she can relax more...and you can both find satisfaction. :)

Good luck with this...

S.
 
HEY!

Hey I know how it is!! i was 21 when i found someone that i loved and we slept together.

I had heard of how a guy that is a virgin is bound to last no more then 10 minutes ..actually five minutes. the first time and then maybe a few minutes more the next few times.

Normally my female friends would talk about how things never lasted half hour even after some time.

SO when it was my first time and we had fooled around,lots of foreplay( thats great stuff:)!!) and oral for me for some time and then once it got to the actual sex i remeber seeing the clock out of the corner of my eye and things were going great.

I just wasnt near an orgasm when we realized someone was back home already and so it was a scramble to act like we were just talking:) during that minute i saw that around 50 minutes had passed. 50 minutes of just sex my first time and was no where near cumming. Hell I was still hard 20 minutes after the other person had gotten home and so i was basically looking for anything to cover my erection with.

SO from then on i always wondered why so many girls had said in the past that its 5 minutes at most and the lucky ones get to 10 minutes before they go off.

I was wondering if something was wrong with me or if they were just repeating a B.S. story.

Either way I really didnt mind:) hell the idea that things can start up around 11pm and still going when the sun is coming up...I gotta say i like that:) the times we had the time it was great even if i didnt cum either times.

Its all about what you 2 are doing to each other becuase of howyou feel and the feeling of it.

Enjoy your time with your girl and dont even bother thinking about cumming.

I know how it is to have your girl frustrated becuase you didnt get off. I know that look where they arent to sure they are doing thigns right.

Make sure you let your girl know she is doingeverything you could have ever dreamt of and make sure she knows you mean it.


Just a suggestion that may help. after you 2 are going at it for a while have her get on top and take control. Maybe the fact that you will then be under her control and she gets to do things how she wants to as fast or as slow ,as soft or as rough as she wants...all that will likely have your body going closer to that thin line you want to cross. That and its a HELL of a VEIW!!!!:p!!!!!

WHo in the world thought a guy should be on top to begin with.???:)!!!!

HOw much better would the world be if it was normally the woman on top and in control of the guy?:)!! OHH Hyeahhhhh!!!;):p:D
 
As far as I can tell, as you get older you simply last longer and it makes things better, at least for you. If she is getting too dry down there, she needs some of that natural lube from your tongue.

How to get her there? Take it slow in initiation. Start the foreplay long before the bedroom. Like small hungry kisses before dinner, lots of hand holding and cuddling. Lots of touching near but not directly at her sensitive zones (sides near the breast, outside of thighs, feet, front and back of knees. Over the long run you can graduate to getting closer and closer to those places on her body that are warming-up. When she is ready to push you down on the floor she should be much wetter and be able to stay with you a lot longer.

While you're in the clenches of her desire, don't forget to keep touching and kissing everywhere you can reach. Keep her at the highest degree you can achieve and when she is at the peak, bring your kisses near, but again not at the gate to her nectar. Kiss her thighs, lick-up only the furthest trails of her liquids. Next time she may let you get closer.

And read the thread about how to help her with the G spot at
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=70892
 
Chuck: No Problem
Freak: I would definetly try the whole tongue tease thing. But she covers up.
As far as I can tell, as you get older you simply last longer and it makes things better, at least for you. If she is getting too dry down there, she needs some of that natural lube from your tongue.
Haha..well..when...we get out of our teens I'll let ya know if I'm lasting longer. She is plenty wet though. Think she orgasm's about 5+ times during the session I'm not sure, afterwards her vagina is throbbing. I assume that's a good thing?

Some more information I got last night. She says I hurt her during sex(and she wants that), and that I touch something in there, she hasn't felt before (Gspot?)She says that I am TEN times better than anyone she's been with(guys with experience), so I'm hoping that might help my cause. Make her feel at ease. I mean I just got my first kiss August 31st this year.

She said, she'll open up;) in time. I've been sucking up to, telling her she has a gorgeous body and shouldn't be embaressed about it and such.

Thanks for the help so far.
 
C'mon baby, it hurts so good.
Sounds like you're slip-sliding along just fine.
 
Since she thinks you're doing a great job... something you may want to try is this... she enjoys the soreness after sex... so don't give her that unless she lets you go down on her... tease her until she's practically begging for your cock... so that she's panting for it... then tell her, you'll give it to her, but she's gotta "earn it"... by letting you go down on her... or by sitting on your face... or letting you look at her body, turn it into a game... if she starts to get truly upset, go on with penetration.

That is how I finally gave in to anal the first time... he wouldn't give me his cock where I wanted it, kept bringing me almost to the point of orgasm with his fingers and then backng off... telling me he wanted me too, but he wanted to hear me say where I wanted it... it took a long long time... b/c I didn't use words like "pussy" or "twat" (I was young... and uncomfortable with talking during sex) and all I would say is "inside me, put it inside me" and he kept asking, "Where inside? Your ass? You know htat's where iwant it to go tonight..." well this dialogue went on for a long time and finally I gave in, and said "put it where ever you want, I DON'T CARE... just do it." I was more turned on at that point than I'd ever been before, so much so that I had enough wetness to use as lube... and that's a hell of a lot for first time anal!

Good luck, and be pleased with your stamina, make it about her and when you quit worrying about getting off you may surprise yourself
:p
 
Good idea Lilpriss(great story btw), she already pulled that with me, asking how I wanted to get off.HJ or BJ. I will definetly give that a shot. Going to the drive in soon to ;). Guess we should get a space near the back.
 
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