Anal play

[BridgetteCaroline]

I have let my partner have anal sex with me 3 times now, and I would like to be more receptive to him. He's always very gentle and respectful and careful. I want to make it easier on us both

He suggested an anal trainer but I am completely clueless. Where do I look? Is it something you put in and leave in?

 

[BillyWalrus]

Are you having any issues or problems taking him in your ass?

 

[BridgetteCaroline]

Are you having any issues or problems taking him in your ass?

Its very painful at first. So much so that its made me whimper (but its not his fault. He's very gentle and uses a lot of lube)

Once he gets past the entry its all fine. Doesn't hurt at all really. But I would love for him to be able to "drive it" as it were

 

[BillyWalrus]

Do you have a dildo that you can practice with? It should not hurt or if it does, it should just be very momentary. You may want to play with the dildo and do some experimenting.

 

[areolaman1]

Its very painful at first. So much so that its made me whimper (but its not his fault. He's very gentle and uses a lot of lube)

Once he gets past the entry its all fine. Doesn't hurt at all really. But I would love for him to be able to "drive it" as it were

start with an anal plug hours a head of time.

 

[Onceuponatime1972]

You could get some butt plugs of varying size. Start with a very small one, wear it for a while, leave it a few days until you feel "normal" again (you'l know what I mean when you try it) , then try it again. Use the same size until you don't feel anything the next day, then increase size (girth) a little, repeat the process.
Once you're able to use a plug that is a similar girth to your man, without it feeling too sore during or after, you're ready to enjoy anal sex. Take your time.

 

[mijayoo]

I enjoy anal only if I’ve had time to prepare myself. Anal lube takes away the sting and helps the penis sliding in. After I’ve been entered I make him not to move until my rear relaxes. It is actually enjoyable and using vibe in your puss adds a level of fantastic for both of you.

 

[SaraSera]

You’re never going to just drive it in. As others have said purchase an anal plug and insert for a few hours prior to engaging on anal sex. You’ll be stretched out and more relaxed. Anal foreplay and lube will take care of the rest. Do you enjoy it?

 

[BridgetteCaroline]

You’re never going to just drive it in. As others have said purchase an anal plug and insert for a few hours prior to engaging on anal sex. You’ll be stretched out and more relaxed. Anal foreplay and lube will take care of the rest. Do you enjoy it?

I mean really go at it once its in.

I enjoy it for what it does to (and for) him. He worships my ass (he's a total ass man). It gives me pleasure seeing him react in such a way.

This (anal plugs) are all very new to me. Do I just leave them in and go about my day like normal?

 

[Onceuponatime1972]

I mean really go at it once its in.

I enjoy it for what it does to (and for) him. He worships my ass (he's a total ass man). It gives me pleasure seeing him react in such a way.

This (anal plugs) are all very new to me. Do I just leave them in and go about my day like normal?

Just put it in later in the day. Try for about 30 minutes to start, and build up. But yes, just go about your evening. You could even wear one when you go out, my wife does it occasionally, only telling me when we're out

 

[LasciviousLibertine]

I have let my partner have anal sex with me 3 times now, and I would like to be more receptive to him. He's always very gentle and respectful and careful. I want to make it easier on us both

He suggested an anal trainer but I am completely clueless. Where do I look? Is it something you put in and leave in?

Top tip for great anal: A thorough douching will, if done right, cleanse it, that's usually one thing many couples forget or don't even know about. A clean ass is a comfortable ass for penetration; it also prevents chocolate on biscuits, if you get my meaning. You know it's clean when you expel only clean (lukewarm) water during the cleansing process.

 

[SaraSera]

I mean really go at it once its in.

I enjoy it for what it does to (and for) him. He worships my ass (he's a total ass man). It gives me pleasure seeing him react in such a way.

This (anal plugs) are all very new to me. Do I just leave them in and go about my day like normal?

No hon. You build up a tolerance to them so the discomfort isn’t there. As you get used to a smaller size then increase a bit. Real talk though, if you’re doing this only for him then step back and evaluate the situation. It’s not fun if it’s not enjoyable for you too.

 

[leftwantingmore]

I might suggest that you get to know your butt plug. It seems to me that getting past the anal ring is the obstacle. Use the plug to stimulate and massage the anus to help the ring relax and slowly work it in at your own pace. Get comfortable with inserting it, then leave it in ahead of foreplay. Take it out when you are ready to put something else in because you might feel empty with nothing in there.
If there is pain, blood or it's "messy", you are doing it wrong. It should be pleasurable. It should go without saying, make sure you colon is clean.

 

[Onceuponatime1972]

No hon. You build up a tolerance to them so the discomfort isn’t there. As you get used to a smaller size then increase a bit. Real talk though, if you’re doing this only for him then step back and evaluate the situation. It’s not fun if it’s not enjoyable for you too.

Precisely this. Only do it of you enjoy it too. Though you may start to enjoy it once you've done some "training ". From a man's perspective it also takes a while to learn the best way to approach it with each individual woman.

 

[Katiel3036]

I have let my partner have anal sex with me 3 times now, and I would like to be more receptive to him. He's always very gentle and respectful and careful. I want to make it easier on us both

He suggested an anal trainer but I am completely clueless. Where do I look? Is it something you put in and leave in?

What i did was work up to something bigger then my partner. After that taking him in was easy and still felt incredible.

 

[BridgetteCaroline]

No hon. You build up a tolerance to them so the discomfort isn’t there. As you get used to a smaller size then increase a bit. Real talk though, if you’re doing this only for him then step back and evaluate the situation. It’s not fun if it’s not enjoyable for you too.

Oh its super enjoyable for me, listening to and watching him react!

 

[SaraSera]

Oh its super enjoyable for me, listening to and watching him react!

If that is enough for you then enjoy. You’ve plenty of quality advice to choose what works best for you.

 

[BridgetteCaroline]

If that is enough for you then enjoy. You’ve plenty of quality advice to choose what works best for you.

I appreciate it all !

 

[gametime07]

I’m curious, what position(s) are you having sex in?

 

[BridgetteCaroline]

I’m curious, what position(s) are you having sex in?

For anal we have done with me on my knees on the bed and him standing on the floor

And me on my knees on the bed and him on his knees behind me on the bed

And one time I had a pillow folded under my pelvis to put my ass in the air while my legs dangled off the bed, and him behind/on top of me. I was completely relaxed and comfortable (once I got past the initial pain).

He told me he "saw the universe" that night!

 

[Onceuponatime1972]

For anal we have done with me on my knees on the bed and him standing on the floor

And me on my knees on the bed and him on his knees behind me on the bed

And one time I had a pillow folded under my pelvis to put my ass in the air while my legs dangled off the bed, and him behind/on top of me. I was completely relaxed and comfortable (once I got past the initial pain).

He told me he "saw the universe" that night!

Maybe try you on top (cowgirl). You get to control pace and depth that way. My wife loves anal, but had never tried anal cowgirl before she met me, it's her favourite position now. I genuinely lose count of how many orgasms she has because she's able to focus the position to hit "the spot"

 

[SaraSera]

Maybe try you on top (cowgirl). You get to control pace and depth that way. My wife loves anal, but had never tried anal cowgirl before she met me, it's her favourite position now. I genuinely lose count of how many orgasms she has because she's able to focus the position to hit "the spot"

Can confirm the benefits of this position.

 

[gametime07]

For anal we have done with me on my knees on the bed and him standing on the floor

And me on my knees on the bed and him on his knees behind me on the bed

And one time I had a pillow folded under my pelvis to put my ass in the air while my legs dangled off the bed, and him behind/on top of me. I was completely relaxed and comfortable (once I got past the initial pain).

He told me he "saw the universe" that night!

You should try missionary also. Legs spread wide, eyes locked on one another as he slides his cock deep inside you.

 

[liliput1]

What i did was work up to something bigger then my partner. After that taking him in was easy and still felt incredible.

This is the right long term solution. The short term solution is this:

Have your partner get a finger or thumb past your sphincter. Then press firmly but very slowly toward your perineum until you adapt. Then the left hip, the right hip, and optionally the tailbone. Then scribe a handful of circles with the finger/thumb, at about half the pressure you were using before. This should relax the muscles enough to be able to accommodate at least two fingers without much discomfort. If that hasn't given you enough working space, repeat the exercise with two fingers and see how you feel. You can practice this alone with toys like a plug. But remember that over time, after a sneeze, laughing, getting up to use the bathroom or fetch something, or in some people after an orgasm you will clench up again and you may have to repeat.

My personal recommendation is not to combine plugs with sex or masturbation until you're old hat at this. Unless you find a plug with a fairly large diameter neck, so that you can't clamp down hard enough to complicate extraction.

A lot of getting things into and out of there is confidence. You've done this before, you can do it again.

 

[Katiel3036]

This is the right long term solution. The short term solution is this:

Have your partner get a finger or thumb past your sphincter. Then press firmly but very slowly toward your perineum until you adapt. Then the left hip, the right hip, and optionally the tailbone. Then scribe a handful of circles with the finger/thumb, at about half the pressure you were using before. This should relax the muscles enough to be able to accommodate at least two fingers without much discomfort. If that hasn't given you enough working space, repeat the exercise with two fingers and see how you feel. You can practice this alone with toys like a plug. But remember that over time, after a sneeze, laughing, getting up to use the bathroom or fetch something, or in some people after an orgasm you will clench up again and you may have to repeat.

My personal recommendation is not to combine plugs with sex or masturbation until you're old hat at this. Unless you find a plug with a fairly large diameter neck, so that you can't clamp down hard enough to complicate extraction.

A lot of getting things into and out of there is confidence. You've done this before, you can do it again.

Very well said. And what you said about the plug is correct. I had one almost get stuck in me
I started to freak out thinking I was gonna have to go to the er because of it.