An honest and thought out answer please

[SeaCat]

Okay,

One of my recent threads has several deleted comments. I don't like this because the subject matter is important to me.

I want a thought out answer, a reasoned answer. An answer that has been percolating for a while. Make it real not just a knee jerk reaction.

Are you willing to use violence to defend yourself and your family? Are you willing to live in fear or are you willing to stand up for what you believe?

Cat

 

[starrkers]

I've been thinking about this since you posted your original thread.

I'd like to think I would use violence to defend me and mine. I have a plan in mind for such an eventuality. But until the time came, I really don't know if I could carry it out.

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

Hell yes. Whether I would have the guts to do it I'll never know until that moment arrives, which I pray never happens.

If someone aggresses against another person, me or mine in particular, he is the one who chose destruction. If I blow his ass to kingdom come with 13 rounds of .40 Silvertip hollowpoints, all I'm doing is giving him his choice for the one person he has the right to choose for - himself.



(There - thoughtful and colorful [red mostly].)

 

[Belegon]

Despite the appearance of civility, I am a savage...if you threaten those I love I will make sure you are either unmotivated or incapable of ever doing so again.

 

[Selena_Kitt]

Despite the appearance of civility, I am a savage...if you threaten those I love I will make sure you are either unmotivated or incapable of ever doing so again.

I knew that about you.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I have and will again if need be

 

[cloudy]

Despite the appearance of civility, I am a savage...if you threaten those I love I will make sure you are either unmotivated or incapable of ever doing so again.

Ditto.

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

Despite the appearance of civility, I am a savage...if you threaten those I love I will make sure you are either unmotivated or incapable of ever doing so again.

Tingle . . .

 

[Wildcard Ky]

Absolutely. I'd have no problem killing someone threatening my family.

I'm sorry that I can't give you a more eloquent answer, but I promise you that it's well thought out.

In all honesty, if they were trying to hurt someone in my family, I'd rather kill them than simply hurt them. I don't trust the American Legal System to keep violent offenders behind bars. If I simply hurt them, they'd be out of jail in 6 months and looking for revenge.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I think I have it in me to kill someone with my bare hands in brutal fashion. I'm actually scared of what I could possibly do to a person if I let myself loose.

 

[Liar]

Are you willing to use violence to defend yourself and your family? Are you willing to live in fear or are you willing to stand up for what you believe?

Putting those two questions together kind of implies that using violence = standing up for what you believe.
And you ask the latter as if standing up for what you believe means that you don't have to live in fear.

I can't quite level with either of those premises, so I can't quite answer it straight.


I stand up for what I believe, which means I might have to live in fear. It's almost always safe to be silent. And what I believe doesn't give me the luxury of bashing peoples' heads in if they don't like what I believe.

And violence must mean something else in your universe than in mine. That's all I can say.

 

[TE999]

Okay,

One of my recent threads has several deleted comments. I don't like this because the subject matter is important to me.

I want a thought out answer, a reasoned answer. An answer that has been percolating for a while. Make it real not just a knee jerk reaction.

Are you willing to use violence to defend yourself and your family? Are you willing to live in fear or are you willing to stand up for what you believe?

Cat

Short answer: yes, no and yes.

As I stated on the other thread, I have weapons in my home and I will use them to defend what is mine and those I love.

All the cops can do is take a report and act sorry for what has happened to you because you were a sheep instead of a wolf.

Enter my home unannounced and unwelcome, then you leave in a body bag.

See, my knee didn't jerk once.

 

[jomar]

I'm a pretty peaceful person, though I struggle with impulses when the dog pees on the carpet for the zillionth time.

Are we talking intruder, one time threat? Or repeating, organized intimidation.

Game theory basically says if your enemy spits in your direction you hit them in the head with a baseball bat. I'm willing to use violence to protect my family, but there are a lot of unkowns. And liar makes a good point - standing up for what you belive (principles) may mean living in fear.

 

[inlovewithyourghost]

While I do hold violence to be a last resort, if there is one thing my fathers taught me in my childhood... it would be how to fight - to win. I do not envy the fool who threatens my loved ones. And if that day ever comes, I hope that my loved ones aren't there to witness it.

As for living in fear... we all live in fear of something. Some of our fears are rational... some unrational. Some things we can change, some we can't. But in the instance of a real threat... I would try to remove myself and my family from the situation before resorting to violence. After all, there is so much more than the immediate to think about... If I am killed or imporisoned as a result of my actions, what good does it do my family. Where have I left them? Would we have been better off dealing with the original situation?

If I had a wife, and both of our lives were at stake, I would do whatever was in my power to ensure ONE of us survived to be there for our children. It may sound absolutely horrible... but if I knew that I couldn't save her without losing my life in the process, I would let her go. That way I would be the one having nightmares for the rest of my life... I would be the one left to pick up the pieces. I would be left to raise the children alone. I just can't stand the thought of it being the other way around. After all.. we're all going to die in the end... But you had better believe... I would be the one to hunt down and massacre the SOB that took her from me.

 

[champagne1982]

I am one of those people who are crippled by outrage. My motor functions freeze and I become quite helpless. Perhaps this is a character flaw, but I honestly can't imagine answering violence with violence.

To do so doesn't prevent further acts from being carried out, so I don't think it would serve as a deterrent at all. In fact, retaliation may be the action that carries the violence out of a fast and furious blow out into a complete and utter maelstrom.

If killing is wrong, then it is wrong in every circumstance, even in those instances where it is sanctioned by law. In a dog eat dog world, I suppose you could just call me Lunch.

 

[R. Richard]

Are you willing to use violence to defend yourself and your family? Are you willing to live in fear or are you willing to stand up for what you believe?

Cat

If you threaten me or mine, you will get a trial. I will be the judge, the jury and the executioner.

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

While I do hold violence to be a last resort, if there is one thing my fathers taught me in my childhood... it would be how to fight - to win. I do not envy the fool who threatens my loved ones. And if that day ever comes, I hope that my loved ones aren't there to witness it.

As for living in fear... we all live in fear of something. Some of our fears are rational... some unrational. Some things we can change, some we can't. But in the instance of a real threat... I would try to remove myself and my family from the situation before resorting to violence. After all, there is so much more than the immediate to think about... If I am killed or imporisoned as a result of my actions, what good does it do my family. Where have I left them? Would we have been better off dealing with the original situation?

If I had a wife, and both of our lives were at stake, I would do whatever was in my power to ensure ONE of us survived to be there for our children. It may sound absolutely horrible... but if I knew that I couldn't save her without losing my life in the process, I would let her go. That way I would be the one having nightmares for the rest of my life... I would be the one left to pick up the pieces. I would be left to raise the children alone. I just can't stand the thought of it being the other way around. After all.. we're all going to die in the end... But you had better believe... I would be the one to hunt down and massacre the SOB that took her from me.

All very rational, except for the last sentence, which is wholly human and fully deserving of sympathy.

 

[Edward Teach]

If we are talking about an immediate physical threat, there is no question that either the attacker or me is going to get hurt. And yes, I am capable of killing.

If, on the other hand, you are talking about some of the more subtle forms of threat, like a loved one being controlled or taken advantage of, then that becomes a little more complicated and difficult to deal with. I recently went through two years of that shit and had to work really hard to maintain control of myself to keep from doing something really stupid.

As to living in fear, we sometimes have no control over that and are powerless to prevent it.

Ed

 

[Belegon]

I am one of those people who are crippled by outrage. My motor functions freeze and I become quite helpless. Perhaps this is a character flaw, but I honestly can't imagine answering violence with violence.

To do so doesn't prevent further acts from being carried out, so I don't think it would serve as a deterrent at all. In fact, retaliation may be the action that carries the violence out of a fast and furious blow out into a complete and utter maelstrom.

If killing is wrong, then it is wrong in every circumstance, even in those instances where it is sanctioned by law. In a dog eat dog world, I suppose you could just call me Lunch.

I admire your convictions, although I do not share your philosophy.

 

[Pure]

I want a thought out answer, a reasoned answer. An answer that has been percolating for a while. Make it real not just a knee jerk reaction.

Are you willing to use violence to defend yourself and your family? Are you willing to live in fear or are you willing to stand up for what you believe?

i find all these questions vague.
1) defend against what? if you mean another's immediate death. e.g, of my wife, yes. defend with lethal force? that would depend on the options. perhaps a crack on the head with a baseball bat would do the trick, rather than emptying a shotgun in his chest.

defend against my own immediate death? that's a bit different, if lethal force is involved. suppose my 16 yr old daughter has become deranged and is about to kill me. would i kill her? maybe she could be cured, up the road.


returning to the case of another's being harmed: suppose however the cops have come to take my wife to prison, under a false conviction, for 10 years. well i'd say that although I might, in a shoot-out, get the first cop or two, there is a good chance we both end up dead. so perhaps nonviolence for the time being is in order.

2) i don't think there's much choice about fear. i'd suppose someone in the French underground in WWII would have to 'live in fear.' that doesn't mean do nothing.

3) stand up for what i believe? stand up, yes. kill? well that would depend what the threat is. take up arms? e.g., after my country is invaded and taken over by nazi's--i'd like to think so, but aamof, most people in France etc. ceased active resistance upon the country being massively taken over.

remark: asking people 'are you brave or yeller?' is going to get predictable BS answers.

here's a little back at you: would you take up arms for what you believe--e.g. in the French underground, in that type of situation-- if you knew that, upon discovery, both you AND your family would be killed?

 

[JamesSD]

Am I weird that as a male I don't spend time thinking about these things?

Maybe it came from growing up in a peaceful, working class suburban neighborhood. Someone robbing our house would have been pretty dissapointed. We had enough, but not a lot of things that would have much value on the black market.

I worry far more about driving a car on the freeway than I do about having my home broken into or being mugged. I do avoid tempting fate; I lock my door at night, and don't walk alone through rough neighborhoods at night. Plus I dress like someone who doesn't have a lot of money, which is apt enough.

So my answer is I choose not to live in fear, nor worry about being forced to choose to use violence. Most murders are committed by people known to the assailant, most robberies are motivated by desperation, not bloodlust. Isaac Asimov wrote "Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent." No one would choose to stand by idly while someone they cared about was being raped or murdered. But that is a rare, extreme circumstance. Time spent worrying about it is far better used worrying about heart disease and cancer, which will kill the majority of us eventually.

 

[mjl2010]

I share the thoughts of the majority who already posted. If someone broke into our home and threatened us with violence, I would feel compelled to answer that threat with violence. Whether I used the baseball bat in the corner. The shotgun under the bed or one of several handguns, I would indeed defend myself and family.

James, while your answer has a nice ring to it, it does imply you deny the possibility of this happening. If a man broke into your house, weilded a knife and came at your wife trapped in a corner, are you saying you wouldn't do anything to defend her. Really? I just find that impossible to believe.

Maybe thinking about what you'd do in such a situation isn't pleasant. I certainly don't find it pleasant. I don't want to kill someone. But I'll be dead defending my wife or child before I let them come to harm. You can be sure of that.

MJL

 

[cumallday]

My answer to all three of your questions revolves around the predicate, "willing". I believe most people like to live in peace and therefore have the inherent "will" to defend themselves and their families and to not live in constant fear. The absence of that inherent "will" would, I believe, lead to an anomic collapse of society. I say this because we, as social creatures, recognize the same desire and willingness to live in peace in others. Without that recognition you might well imagine all of us devolving into some kind of Hobbesian state of nature, every man for himself, where life is, "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short."

This is not to say that our will might never be tested. Society is, as you well know, naturally unbalanced and complex. It is how strong your will to keep the peace about yourself and your family that should reflect the norms of the society you live in. Of course, strength of one's individual will alone does not always suffice. I once saw a documentary on life in Columbia, South America. The most likely cause of death in Columbia is murder. More often than not it is the collective will of society to live in peace, free of violence and fear that counts.

I have a friend who is originally from Haiti. He has confessed killing in self defence as a young man in order to protect not just his family, but his village. We both agree that he had to do what he had to do, but he says he still, to this day, feels sorry for what he and the other men in his village did. How did that line from Eastwood's "Unforgiven" go, "It's a hell of a thing, killing a man. Take away all he's got and all he's ever gonna have."

 

[matriarch]

I would defend my family and loved ones up to and including my life.

Whether I would be violent in that defence, as a response to violence, is another matter altogether.

As for guns.....*shudder*.....don't have one (can't in UK), don't want one, never handled one, never want to handle one, and I find it terrifying and not a little saddening, to read the ease with which some of you state that you'd use them in that defence.

 

[mjl2010]

I would defend my family and loved ones up to and including my life.

Whether I would be violent in that defence, as a response to violence, is another matter altogether.

As for guns.....*shudder*.....don't have one (can't in UK), don't want one, never handled one, never want to handle one, and I find it terrifying and not a little saddening, to read the ease with which some of you state that you'd use them in that defence.

Guns don't kill people. People kill people. If someone threatened you with death or rape, would you not hope at that moment for someone else to intervene. Here's this drugged out maniac with a gun who just shot your dog and now's he's coming up the stairs to shoot you. Are you telling me that given the means you would not defend yourself. You wouldn't pick up the gun laying there and fire it in your own defense? Is this what you mean?

MJL