an awkward question for me...

[pianochick77]

hi everyone, i'm new here.
Well, i have been masturbating for a while now, but i seem to only get an orgasm if i stimulate my clitoris. Penetrating my vagina does nothing. It doesn't feel awkward but it doesn't feel exciting to me either.
I really want to orgasm from using my vagina instead
Can someone please help me?

 

[Eilan]

Despite what porn would have you believe, a lot of women are unable to orgasm solely from penetration (I do now, but it took a long time for me to get to that point), so you're definitely not alone.

The info in the Try This & Report Back thread might be helpful to you.

 

[SweetErika]

hi everyone, i'm new here.
Well, i have been masturbating for a while now, but i seem to only get an orgasm if i stimulate my clitoris. Penetrating my vagina does nothing. It doesn't feel awkward but it doesn't feel exciting to me either.
I really want to orgasm from using my vagina instead
Can someone please help me?

Eilan pretty much said it all. (BTW, by "a lot of women" we're talking somewhere in the neighborhood of 75%, so it's perfectly normal to not come from penetration/vaginal stimulation alone!)

Is there a reason you don't want to orgasm with clit stimulation?

Have you tried combining clit and vaginal stimulation? I don't get a ton of pleasure from vaginal or g-spot stimulation alone, but when the right kind is combined with good clit stimulation, I have the best orgasms, bar none. I prefer a good vibe + Hubby's fingers, but next to that, a toy like the Rabbit is really great. There are lots of different styles and stores to choose from; I just chose that one because the base price at least is good and that particular model is time-tested (you probably want a rabbit that takes at least 3 AA or 3 C batteries; models that lack batteries tend to not power both functions well and run out of juice really quickly; rechargeable batteries are always a good idea). eBay's Mature Audiences section, under Everything Else, is a great place to get good deals on rabbits and Adam & Eve lets you return things you don't like for 90 days.

The "Try this..." thread Eilan linked to is a good source of g-spot info, but I'd advise you to use it as one resource and experiment to see what, specifically, works for you. Those 'tried and true' instructions don't work for me at all, for instance, but the thread did give me the idea to explore g-spot and vaginal stimulation more. They may or may not work for you, but if they don't, keep exploring to find what does work for your body and don't think there's anything wrong with you, your technique, etc.!

 

[charmingdimples]

Thank you all for the information. I have the samem problemm

 

[littlebitshe]

I also have to have clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm. I have some really amazing orgasms when I'm being penetrated and I'm rubbing my clit at the same time! It does get in the way in certain positions... such as doggie style. I wish I could orgasm w/out clitoral stimulation, but so far I have not been able to. It's just something i've learned to accept.

 

[Mr.G]

Tried And True

And just to clarify ...

Those 'tried and true' instructions don't work for me at all ...

Erica. Never claimed they were tried and true or for ALL women ALL the time. Just a variation that I have found amazing with the women I've been with and a few posts suggest it's rocked their boat too but it is offered as a VARIATION to everything else that couples do. The reason for its popularity appears more along the lines that not too many men OR women learn about this area or how to stimulate it properly. For those it works for it is tried and true. For those it doesn't work for it is just another technique that was tried and produced no stellar effects. Win some. Lose some but worth the TRY.

As you know from many of the feedback posts on the TRY THIS thread the chances of her getting much satisfaction from GSpot stimulation is likely small. It seems it has MUCH more success in women in the 30's, 40's and up.

PIANOCHIK, another point that hasn't come up yet is the fact that sex may feel good (by yourself or with a partner) but reaching orgasm takes time, practice, trying new things and most of all getting "there" in your head first. GREAT sex comes like anything physical you want to do. Nobody runs a 4 minute mile the first time they go jogging. Watching porn is like watching the Fake Olympics. These people are trained to do various things on command. They cut and splice. The add sound tracks. They use just the right amount of light. They air brush out blemishes. Everything is perfect. In real life you have to deal with smells, tastes, textures that you've never experienced before. You have to likely overcome mental blocks based on family or religious teachings and societal concept andf misconceptions too. Once you get everything down and are comfortable then you can concentrate on that "4 minute mile". It takes time. Don't despair. Stay safe. Stay SANE and over time and with the right partner it IS everything you've heard or thought it could be. It just doesn't happen right away.

 

[Tyr51]

Very common issue. Just putting those two cents in. *hugs*

 

[linus4550]

I'm prolly not much help, being a guy, but I do know that everyone is very different when it comes to this situation.