Chris_Michael
2B or Not 2B
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2015
- Posts
- 5,510
I'm just curious. Yeah yeah, go ahead and get your punches in about me being a loser. Don't care.
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Thanks to both of you.
Losing the virginity isn't really the endgame. I'm 29, and the problem isn't with the women I meet. It's a really complicated personal issue due to multiple factors like depression, anxiety, and numerous other obstacles. It's all being treated professionally, but it will not solve the sex problem.
I guess I was just seeing if there was anyone who could relate.
The worst part about it is the loneliness at times. I heard a man say that the most shocking part of his first encounter with a woman was how warm her body was up against his. That's the type of thing I don't even know about. It's like being deaf or blind because you have no idea what those feelings are.
Anyway, just food for thought. I appreciate the encouragement.![]()
Hang in there bud. Sounds like you're looking for intimacy, not just sex. Keep your head up and good luck.
Yup, intimacy seems to be what you're looking for, and that's much harder to find than sex. If you just wanted to get laid, you could always fire up Tinder, or hit the local bar, or hire a prostitute. You are certainly not alone when it comes to intimacy.
But is this something that bothers you, or are you perfectly fine with your situation? If it bothers you, why haven't you done something about it? Do you get out enough? That's something I've struggled with. I'm such a homebody that I don't get out enough. And of course I'm not going to meet people when that happens.
Also, when you do get into a relationship, trust me: you will look back at your single days fondly. You'll wish you could have the freedom to do whatever you want again. Not having to compromise. That's not to say relationships are bad, but a bad relationship is WAYYY worse than being single. Embrace the situation you're in.
With some of the girls I slept with in high school and beyond I wish I could take it back. It's worth it if you wait mate.
I've only been with one person, so if I reverted to an earlier save, I'd be a virgin.![]()
Chris
Seems to me just from what you've shared on this thread you're a real honest and together guy, for all the challenges you face. Good on you! Couple of things:
Please take delight in yourself, your passions, and your sexual energy and desire; solo pleasure is a thing of real value.
Please keep in mind that close friendship with the right person, whether platonic or with a sexual dimension, has massive potential to empower you as regards the challenges you live with. We are all 'walking wounded' to some degree; a genuine person who might have a growing affection for you is drawn to you as you are, any complicating factors included.
Hey. The best to you. Simon.
This is definitely the place for you if you are a virgin. I don't think of you as a loser. I think of you as a person willing to see and explore what options are out there until you make that decision for yourself. Let your imagination soar. Know that there are those here with issues of their own using this arena as a way of escape from the pressures life can throw at you. You'll find yourself welcomed as you are now. You can read the plathora of stories, participate on threads, be a bit active on the posts and stalk as much as you want to.
Please don't feel so far behind you think you are the first though. And I'm very sure you are not the last. There is a venue here for everyone. Read a story. Pick different genres. Explore what excites you. The world's your oyster here.
In real life, it could help with overcoming the issues conflicting you. It's all in your paradigm of thought.![]()
Be kind to yourself, my friend. Whether or not you've had sex, making a meaningful connection with another person isn't an easy thing to do. You can never underestimate the role of luck or fortune in these things. I've been around long enough to know that you should never assume things will always be a certain way. They can change amazingly fast.
Out of all that bloviating, what you should really take away is be kind to yourself. Good luck.
I 100% agree with this. Growing up, I thought that everybody just got married. I went to church and saw families, and I thought god was just going to hand me a woman on a silver platter. I expected to get married and take care of a family.
Not anymore! Some people are more fortunate than others. Then again, marriage may be less fortunate than being single! I might have actually gotten lucky after all!
If you're lucky enough (emphasis on lucky) to marry the right person, it's worth it, though even happy marriages are a lot of work and a challenge, even tedious occasionally. That said, you're much better off single than marrying the wrong person.
C'mon, you're smart, insightful, and articulate. Don't give up.
You have more about you, pal. Address that fear. When the opportunity comes you'll be working through that fear with some lovely gal who will take deep delight in playing her part in your journey through the anxiety to the pleasure and the joy. That will be a privilege for her. Such that she will want you again and again until you're a stud with her and she's screaming.... So, this seems contradicting. I want sex but I don't want sex. It's a biological urge but a pure fear as well. So, porn and my imagination will have to do. ...
You have more about you, pal. Address that fear. When the opportunity comes you'll be working through that fear with some lovely gal who will take deep delight in playing her part in your journey through the anxiety to the pleasure and the joy. That will be a privilege for her. Such that she will want you again and again until you're a stud with her and she's screaming.
Why not that scenario, Chris? Look forward to it.
So ultimately, you just want to get laid with no commitments nor conversation?
No no no, of course not. Wait. I'm not sure how to answer this. I don't know what I want.
Ultimately the choice is yours of how and what you do with your life. I'm not here to force you to make a decision, but to let you know friends or friendly people are here if you want to get to know them.if you choose to be lonely, please forgive me for overstepping my boundaries.
Sex is not the main focus in me chatting here but just being genuine. I'm not after your underwear...lol...So no pressure.