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Misshotndeep said:
If you don't like the topic or way this thread is going then you have the right to leave. Don't let the door hit you! Bye Felicia!!! 👋🏾
I won't even mention your taste in friends as everyone knows how I feel about that cunt.
As to the issue, as I started a lot of do called ”subs” on here are just needy bitches who want attention and don't even understand the basics of a BDSM relationship at all. There are some lovely ladies here. Not a lot mind you.

And now I am talking as a former Dome myself. Just cuz I don't do it anymore does not mean I did not once upon A time.

There are three things that are necessities for any D relationship. Any relationship at all really. They are trust, respect, and communication. From all I have read and discussed with many of the true Doms here, the so call subs of Lit, exhibit none of these. Not a one. They top from the bottom or give zero submission while demanding total on-demand attention from thier would be Doms. Please be advised that their are some on here who do truly understand the concept of a Ds relationship and respect those rules.
The fact you dumb cunts are even on here bitching about these basics shows you have no clue and need to either be re-educated or stop calling yourselves SUbs.
Your just attention-seeking needy bitches with issues.
If you don't like what I have to say then block me or leave the thread. But let's be honest what you really don't like is the truth!
Click to expand...

:nana:

What?

I've never interacted with you, ever. But now that I have, let's be honest. What I really don't like is you.

Everyone knows how you feel? I don't think anyone knows you.

Check your little BDSM box:

BDSM NOT INTO IT! Aka I am not the sub you are looking for!
Click to expand...

So why are you on the BDSM forum?
 
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cookiecat said:
:nana:

What?

I've never interacted with you, ever. But now that I have, let's be honest. What I really don't like is you.

Everyone knows how you feel? I don't think anyone knows you.

Check your little BDSM box:



So why are you on the BDSM forum?
Click to expand...

I can be anywhere I want. But as stated earlier I was a Domme and have experience that most lack here. If you don't know what a Domme is then I suggest you Google that shit. Anymore answered you need to be repeated?
 
Faralicious said:
Her one friend here dumped her. She’s angry and sad.
Click to expand...

No, I'm annoyed and bored. See my friends aren't mindless sheep. We can agree to disagree and not stop talking. I know it's a deep mature thought and that's hard for you. But real friends work though any shit that comes up and always stand as one. You ain't got nothing backing you up but that beeping sound.
 
slv4me said:
I'm not sure I understand what two exclamation points has to do with anything. Stating that it defines ALL subs is an assumption I don't think you can make based on what I said. If you read what was written, it's about subs on this site (and lifestyle sites) that answer ads with a poor understanding of what a TRUE Dom is.
If any TRUE sub is offended by this or thinks it was directed to them, I stand corrected and apologize if it offended you.
Click to expand...

I hate that phrase "True Dom/True sum". Everyone has different needs, and what I need from my Dom is something unique to me. What you need in a sub is unique to you. Look for the sub who fits your needs. Simple.

ETA: I should have read the entire thread before posting. :rolleyes:
 
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Misshotndeep said:
If you don't like the topic or way this thread is going then you have the right to leave. Don't let the door hit you! Bye Felicia!!! 👋🏾
I won't even mention your taste in friends as everyone knows how I feel about that cunt.
As to the issue, as I started a lot of do called ”subs” on here are just needy bitches who want attention and don't even understand the basics of a BDSM relationship at all. There are some lovely ladies here. Not a lot mind you.

And now I am talking as a former Dome myself. Just cuz I don't do it anymore does not mean I did not once upon A time.

There are three things that are necessities for any D relationship. Any relationship at all really. They are trust, respect, and communication. From all I have read and discussed with many of the true Doms here, the so call subs of Lit, exhibit none of these. Not a one. They top from the bottom or give zero submission while demanding total on-demand attention from thier would be Doms. Please be advised that their are some on here who do truly understand the concept of a Ds relationship and respect those rules.
The fact you dumb cunts are even on here bitching about these basics shows you have no clue and need to either be re-educated or stop calling yourselves SUbs.
Your just attention-seeking needy bitches with issues.
If you don't like what I have to say then block me or leave the thread. But let's be honest what you really don't like is the truth!
Click to expand...

Oh wow, this is quite the emotional outburst! I’m feeling a little sad I didn’t my own personal firework show to the response I posted to one of your comments on the first page. But I’m a big girl, and I have the feeling the real fireworks have yet to begin...

It’s interesting, looking at this post. It appears you’re trying to communicate that:

a. Anyone with with responses that you deem to be negative shouldn’t comment, and that they don’t know what they’re talking about (and this sentiment seems to be primarily aimed at those identifying as subs)
b. That the existence of true/fake dom and sub indentities is ‘real’ and can be detected and scrutinised by you solely from the minimal information others provide about themselves on a public message board
c. That you believe your previous indentification as a ‘domme’ (I assume dome was a typo) qualifies you to hold these views
d. To obtain a true dom/sub identity (as defined by you) requires one to respond favourably to your ideas - to meet your approval, of sorts
e. That meeting your approval is something that others here posting here should have interest in, based on... your views? My insights get a bit hazy at this point. I’ll admit in not familiar with your posting history outside of this thread.

I have nothing else to say other than please keep talking. I’ve been learning a lot recently about control and power dynamics outside of the BDSM world and it’s interesting to see how people jostle for perceived power in public spaces. This thread is a great example of how we all manage ourselves through this process (when you see it, you’ll see how it plays out in almost every setting it isn’t called out and actively managed in and how often that get bungled).
 
Faralicious said:
Bitch, everyone here is backing me up. PG, too.


*hands you a cracker*
Click to expand...

My inbox says else wise but the fact you think this is a popularity contest shows how immature you are. And yes I am a bitch. Best bitch you will ever meet. Take lessons since your nothing but a child with a keyboard. I would be offended if it was not so hilarious. Oh, wait, no. Wouldn't. SMH
You truly are a piece of shit. I am anxiously awaiting your flushing.
And the fact you openly put up the Heathers shot shows that you are owning every word I say about you.
It doesn't matter how many of my posts you have taken down. You are what you are. A bully and the reason people like you are why folks go postal and hurt themselves. My post still get read and I still get messages.

Back to the thread And something actually worthy of my time.
Power dynamics are always interesting to watch. I have seen it here and elsewhere. Typically I ignore those who try to step on me as they must have lost their damn mind. I am not that kinda woman. I'm actually more dominant than a lot of the men here. 🤣
 
Ropebunny said:
Oh wow, this is quite the emotional outburst! I’m feeling a little sad I didn’t my own personal firework show to the response I posted to one of your comments on the first page. But I’m a big girl, and I have the feeling the real fireworks have yet to begin...

It’s interesting, looking at this post. It appears you’re trying to communicate that:

a. Anyone with with responses that you deem to be negative shouldn’t comment, and that they don’t know what they’re talking about (and this sentiment seems to be primarily aimed at those identifying as subs)
b. That the existence of true/fake dom and sub indentities is ‘real’ and can be detected and scrutinised by you solely from the minimal information others provide about themselves on a public message board
c. That you believe your previous indentification as a ‘domme’ (I assume dome was a typo) qualifies you to hold these views
d. To obtain a true dom/sub identity (as defined by you) requires one to respond favourably to your ideas - to meet your approval, of sorts
e. That meeting your approval is something that others here posting here should have interest in, based on... your views? My insights get a bit hazy at this point. I’ll admit in not familiar with your posting history outside of this thread.

I have nothing else to say other than please keep talking. I’ve been learning a lot recently about control and power dynamics outside of the BDSM world and it’s interesting to see how people jostle for perceived power in public spaces. This thread is a great example of how we all manage ourselves through this process (when you see it, you’ll see how it plays out in almost every setting it isn’t called out and actively managed in and how often that get bungled).
Click to expand...

I don't care if anyone cares. And pretty much everything you outlined is wrong. There are actually set definitions for different types of subs. There is a working kink dictionary. Ignoring it does not make it not exist. I miss the old days where there were multiple sites to explain D relationship. So many confuse being a brat with being a bitch. They also confuse the concept of the sub having the ultimate power in the relationship with topping from the bottom.
Simple concepts that don't take a lot of brainwork. Sigh. This is why so many ”subs” here are dumped by their Doms and Doms are unhappy. Lack of basic knowledge. It's also why society as a whole is tucked right now in my IMO.
Lack of basic.
I understand the kinks and taste vary but the basic of Ds relationships are universal. Trust, communication, and respect.
And you can feel free to disagree with me. It just a couple of cunts I hope die painfully I am not nice to. 😁
 
Misshotndeep said:
I don't care if anyone cares. And pretty much everything you outlined is wrong. There are actually set definitions for different types of subs. There is a working kink dictionary. Ignoring it does not make it not exist. I miss the old days where there were multiple sites to explain D relationship. So many confuse being a brat with being a bitch. They also confuse the concept of the sub having the ultimate power in the relationship with topping from the bottom.
Simple concepts that don't take a lot of brainwork. Sigh. This is why so many ”subs” here are dumped by their Doms and Doms are unhappy. Lack of basic knowledge. It's also why society as a whole is tucked right now in my IMO.
Lack of basic.
I understand the kinks and taste vary but the basic of Ds relationships are universal. Trust, communication, and respect.
And you can feel free to disagree with me. It just a couple of cunts I hope die painfully I am not nice to. 😁
Click to expand...

I can totally agree on trust, communication and respect being the universal base of every healthy D/s relationship.

Problem is though, that I believe that not only does that apply to D/s relationships that applies to every relationship, and also more broadly to anyone we choose to interact with. Everyone deserves a basic level of respect, like not being sworn at in anger. I can tell that you don’t feel similarly, since you’ve spoken disrespectfully to just about everyone in this thread. That is your right, though I do question the origins of the intensity of emotion you’re offloading on us. I think we can all tell that something else outside of these 3 pages is triggering you and if you don’t know where that’s coming from then spending some time figuring that out probably isn’t a bad idea. You’re not going to get that kind of insight from here.
 
Ropebunny said:
I can totally agree on trust, communication and respect being the universal base of every healthy D/s relationship.

Problem is though, that I believe that not only does that apply to D/s relationships that applies to every relationship, and also more broadly to anyone we choose to interact with. Everyone deserves a basic level of respect, like not being sworn at in anger. I can tell that you don’t feel similarly, since you’ve spoken disrespectfully to just about everyone in this thread. That is your right, though I do question the origins of the intensity of emotion you’re offloading on us. I think we can all tell that something else outside of these 3 pages is triggering you and if you don’t know where that’s coming from then spending some time figuring that out probably isn’t a bad idea. You’re not going to get that kind of insight from here.
Click to expand...

I don't give respect freely. It's earned with me. I don't give a fuck who they are on that note. No exceptions but my kid.
I did actually say those three things are part of every relationship if you're re-reading my post. I only have a friendship with one person who is here in this thread. You seem to be under the impression that I should care about others' opinions. Why? I will gladly listen but actually caring...
And I have not been triggered. When a useless cunt approaches me she gets what she gives.
I stated my opinion. You don't have to agree with it. I don't agree with a lot that has been said in this thread but I don't even mention most of it. If a reader think the shoe fits then that is their issue, not mine. I don't own their insecurities.
Also, if you're going to bring up my post then I ask that you acknowledge that I stated there are some true subs on the site. By true subs I mean the ones who know that Christian Grey crap is just crap and abuse.
The basics are just that and many have ignored them and expected a working relationship. They ain't getting it. Just because they hate that I am saying it does not change that fact.
I only posted on here based on a conversation a certain person and I had on this very topic many times. That a person posted here. I have no reason to vent today either. I'm feeling fabulous! 👑 So again... Buzz wrong! Please feel free to try to psychoanalyze me more at your convenience. It's interesting to read.
 
Imagine what a better world it would be if, whatever our grievances, we stopped calling one another cunts and bitches.
 
If anything, I'm a little switchy. Not really into the lifetyle, but have fooled around with ity.

I use dating apps/sites. They are loaded with weirdos and scammers, no matter their proclivities. That's just how it is. Don't let them get to you,
 
Lost_Yonder said:
https://memecrunch.com/meme/BIOFL/shit-show/image.jpg
Click to expand...

The title, OP posts (is this a bad personal ad?), and subsequent spiral of this thread has left me a bit sad. Some highlights are the posts trying to help and clarify by Topleasehim, Acktion (I still want to call you your old SN), and Ropebunny. Thank you for being pillars.

OP: Your choice of using condescending language in your replies to posters asking for clarity was this thread’s downfall. I do hope that you’re able to learn something from this and move on, choosing to be better about self-reflection before you reply to something emotionally charged. This is something I’m currently working on myself, so I can tell you it isn’t easy.
 
Dreamliner said:
Pulling up a chair, GB lite, is that was this sub-forum is?

https://us.123rf.com/450wm/deagreez/deagreez1801/deagreez180100266/93601668-cool-man-in-glasses-hold-cigarette-glass-with-brandy-in-formal-wear-tux-with-red-bowtie-and-pocket-s.jpg?ver=6

This thread went sideways quickly. Comment to the topic, not attacking the individual.
Click to expand...

I had a problem trying to discern the topic, to be entirely honest. I think it is about people who might be starting to explore submissive tendencies being careful about not telling someone they aren’t a Dom? I mean - I can get behind that concept. Everyone is different, as pointed out by many on this thread before me. I liked how Acktion put it: “not a” isn’t appropriate language while, “not my” is.

If that is the entire thread, then I fear this might be a dead horse now (unless the GB-lite discussion style continues). I also still disagree with this thread’s title: I really did not need to waste my time reading all of this.
 
Well this is a lively thread. New people with the attitude of 'do me' exist across the D/s spectrum. It's much better understood with men who want to be submissive to a mistress but is actually just as common among women who want to be submissive.

My video contribution (and I think gold dust at summing up an issue )
https://youtu.be/drcTRzO2wMk

I wish there was one for someone giving a self proclaimed title and honorific because it's just as bad.

To the OP yes it was wrong for anyone to say you are not a Dom, as has been said you are not her Dom is right. In the same way I get the gist these women are not your sub so when communicating you are talking as equals until.a time you both agree to an authority exchange. Because you are equals until.you mutually agree the woman/women feel you are not Dommly enough. That's inexperience on their part.

But these women are new and might well have a set idea of what they want
There is a good chance they have not yet explored their submissive side in real life yet and online is a way to dip their toe in the water.

It's really crap with covid but to the OP soon as possible I would reach out to you actual community. Go to munches and classes, get to know your local community. 'Do me' people will still be there but it's a lot easier to spot them face to face.

From when I started to explore I was told I'm not a real submissive in fact I'm pretty proud now of my title of fake sub. So if it helps the issue really does go both ways. Funnily enough in rl no partner has questioned if I'm faking submission to them. Online I had to speak to 20-50 men telling me they are Doms to find 1 I could consider authority exchange with. Then of those we dont match on kinks, but I've made damn good friends with them.
 
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Ropebunny said:
It’s not really an imagination issue though is it? That’s a very reductionist view that is easy to throw around to paint others in a negative light. If a person struggles with generating any form of empathetic response to others online that says more about them than about the method of communication in my opinion.

It’s more so that without the non-verbal communication that comes from interacting in person the verbal (in this case written) communication becomes the only manner of connecting. Problem is, we all leave tiny little hints in the things we write and type, little Easter eggs that link to the way we see and feel. We read, and we feel and sometimes get a negative internal response to someone else’s writing. When enough people feel the same, the issue is unlikely to be with those people as individuals and more likely to do with the communicator themselves, the Easter eggs they are hiding.
Click to expand...

I think that we are basically describing the same problem from different angles. In the end the problem is that many people have a difficult time inventing themselves in a real personal interaction with someone where the only (or mostly) only source of communications is text. If you want to same lack of imagination or lack of empathy... frankly I think both are correct from different angles. Ive witnessed other people make it work and have a wonderful emotional relationship that starts online. The difference seems IMO and experience to effort. Many people dont want to put in much effort. In many cases that is a common denominator why people look for a relationship online. They dont want to go through the heart ache and effort to look for that rare person locally...
 
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