Ain't No Woman Like the One-Eyed Gott

[Dillinger]

I just heard this song on the radio:

"Ain't No Woman Like the One-Eyed Gott"

And just had to revive this thread...

What are the worst lyrics you've ever heard OR mis-heard. Make 'em up if you want to... for example:

And if the spam breaks open many years too soon
And if there is no room upon Mr. Bill
And if your bed explodes with dark forebodings too
I'll see you on the dark side of the spoon

 

[Gnufi Poppets]

I am being the big BIG fan of The Living Colour...

Look into my thighs, what do you see?
Cough drop personality
I know you bang her, with the teams
I've been everything you want with brie
I'm the cough drop personality
Like muscle lean meat and Ken and he
I'm the cough drop personality
Cough drop personality
Cough drop personality

 

[TN_Vixen]

There's a country song that starts out:

"I wish I had a car..." *groan*

And, I know that this is supposed to be a thread where you hate the lyrics, but I'll add one that I just love even though it is pretty bad.

Just a-swingin'

"Her name is Charlotte Johnson
She's the apple of my eye
And when I'm on the swing with her
It makes me almost high"

"Her brother was on the front porch
eatin' chocolate pie
Her momma was in the kitchen
cuttin' chicken up to fry
Her daddy was in the backyard
rollin up the garden hose
I was on the swing with Charlotte
Feelin love down to my toes"

And we were swingin'
(swiiiiingin')
And we were swingin'
(swiiiiiingin')


*laughing* I just love that song.

 

[Ask For More]

"Oh Lord, won't you buy meeeee......a Mercedes Benz?"

Gimme a break. I want a Nissan Skyline!

 

[TN_Vixen]

Also

Alan Jackson's song "It's alright to be little bitty"
He just recently came out with another song about it being ok to be little.

I think he has been going to one of those self-validation gurus who have pumped him up (so to speak) about the size issue.

I'm little, but it's alright because darnet... people like me!

 

[KillerMuffin]

When I dance they call me Macarena
and the boys they say que soy buena
they all want me
they can't have me
so they all come and dance beside me
Move with me
Chant with me
and if your good I'll take you home with me

1 - Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria, Macarena
Hey Macarena

(rpt 1)

But don't worry about my boyfriend
He's a boy who's name is Vitorino
I don't want him
couldn't stand him
He was no good so I ...

Now come on, what was I supposed to do?
He was out of town and his two friends were sooo fine

(rpt 1) 2x

I am not trying to seduce you

(rpt 1) 2x

Come and find me, my name is Macarena
always at the party con las chicas que soy buena
come join me,
dance with me
and you fellows chant along with me.

(rpt 1)



Worst song, worst lyrics, worst dance, worst everything. Fess up, who can actually do the macarena?

 

[Mustang Sally]

Fess up, who can actually do the macarena?

Oh, oh, I can! lol (I can't dance, so I find simple, choreographed moves enjoyable. )

Sadly, it seems to be a dying talent. I actually found myself *leading* it at the last wedding I went to. People were following *my* moves. How embarrassing.