Adults Letter To Santa

[Draco]

http://www.wtv-zone.com/LadyBoheme/dearsanta.html

(Safe Link) Fill in the blanks then copy/paste your letter here.
It's hilarious, I'll start with mine:

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Melissa's Christmas party. It was Sandy who spiked the punch with too much Vodka. I can't help it if I drank 7 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Vanilla.

I thought it was funny when I put Rick's Jeans on my head and danced the Tango on the Chair while singing `Venus'. I didn't mean to break Melissa's Razor and don't know why Melissa would sue me for Rape.

I don't remember calling Ritchy's wife a move pig---even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on Carol's husband's arm, it was only because I ate too much of that Steak.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Car through my neighbor's Wall. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a throw dog and have me arrested for burglary!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all catch and . And I'm really not to blame for any of this stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and yours,
Mike (Really a nice Boy!)

P.S. It's only 7 bucks!

 

[Arc da Rat]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Dana's Christmas party. It was Iris who spiked the punch with too much Smirnoff Ice. I can't help it if I drank 10 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Bayberry.

I thought it was funny when I put Mario's Shirt on my head and danced the Mambo on the Chair while singing `Rio'. I didn't mean to break Dana's Hair Dryer and don't know why Dana would sue me for Pickpocketing.

I don't remember calling Enzo's wife a Big Chicken---even though she looked like one with Black eye shadow and Red lipstick!

And when I threw up on Karen's husband's Belly, it was only because I ate too much of that BBQ Chicken.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Truck through my neighbor's Garage. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a Tiny Cat and have me arrested for Thief!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all Long and Short. And I'm really not to blame for any of this Huge stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and Early yours,
Arc (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 28 bucks!

 

[lilminx]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Britt's Christmas party. It was Erica who spiked the punch with too much apple martini. I can't help it if I drank 7 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like perfume.

I thought it was funny when I put Frank's bra on my head and danced the tango on the bed while singing `Macarena'. I didn't mean to break Britt's vibrator and don't know why Britt would sue me for burglary.

I don't remember calling John's wife a stinky cow---even though she looked like one with red eye shadow and magenta lipstick!

And when I threw up on Erica's husband's toe, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my bus through my neighbor's chimney. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a volatile dog and have me arrested for murder!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all whorish and dazzling. And I'm really not to blame for any of this illuminating stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and quickly yours,
Minx (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 15 bucks!

 

[Draco]

*QUOTE* " So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my bus through my neighbor's chimney"

Lady, what WERE you smoking...???


LOL

 

[SINthysist]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Manu's Christmas party. It was Chilled who spiked the punch with too much Vodka. I can't help it if I drank 7 pints. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like 'nilla.

I thought it was funny when I put REDWAVE's Jeans on my head and danced the Tango on the Chair while singing `Venus'. I didn't mean to break Manu's Razor and don't know why Manu would sue me for Rape.

I don't remember calling mile's wife a cunting pig---even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on Glamorilla's husband's arm, it was only because I ate too much of that Hagus.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my biped through into neighbor's second-story flat. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a drunken old sot and have me arrested for burglary!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all hungover and vowing revenge on the board. And I'm really not to blame for any of this stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and yours,
p_p_man (Really a spankable Boy!)

P.S. It's only 7 quid!

 

[concrete]

SANTA

I DID my best.
For allmost 10 months as a junior parterner of LIT. I was attentive + disciplined..
The situations which occurred at the General Board party ,do not reflect my true identity...
the true cement head ,that I am ,,perhaps indulged in too much APRIL WINE, while reaching for a PURDEE FLOWER. With chilled vodka in my viens I TWYSEK no what I do...
Miles ..from Uncle j 's farm I feel into this pile of WEED.
In my dream this Princess4ME er U tried to show me the way...
then this Tank Commander ran over me ..I lost all THOUGHTS,and Killer Muffin ideas. The concept of being trapped in a TIGERJEN gage with a WIERD H .guy made me grab the first bottle of GINNY i saw
.please call after I'm released from LIT.

 

[ExLimey]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Beth's Christmas party. It was John who spiked the punch with too much Bombay Sapphire. I can't help it if I drank 19 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like pine.

I thought it was funny when I put Suzy's bra on my head and danced the macarena on the piano while singing `I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar´. I didn´t mean to break Beth´s garage door opener and don´t know why Beth would sue me for polygamy.

I don't remember calling Mike's wife a silly cow---even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Sarah's husband's feet, it was only because I ate too much of that nachos.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Jeep through my neighbor's chicken coop. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a filthy pig-dog and have me arrested for criminal sexual conduct!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all drunk and confused. And I'm really not to blame for any of this unbelievable stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and desperately yours,

ExLimey (Really a nice Boy!)

P.S. It's only 1000 bucks!

 

[LukkyKnight]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Perky's Christmas party. It was tswyk who spiked the punch with too much vodka. I can't help it if I drank thirteen glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like cinnamon.

I thought it was funny when I put RubyFruit's boot on my head and danced the twist on the loveseat while singing `Sledgehammer'. I didn't mean to break Perky's PDA and don't know why Perky would sue me for sending email spam.

I don't remember calling Jimi's wife a icy plow horse---even though she looked like one with ultra maroon eye shadow and hot pink lipstick!

And when I threw up on MorgaineLaFay's husband's feet, it was only because I ate too much of that sushi.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Harley through my neighbor's hall closet. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a sleepy racoon and have me arrested for embezzling!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all righteous and hot. And I'm really not to blame for any of this fresh stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and nearly yours,
Lukky (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It's only sixty-nine bucks!

 

[bknight2602]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Jan's Christmas party. It was Susie who spiked the punch with too much Water. I can't help it if I drank 4 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like pussy.

I thought it was funny when I put Steve's Pantties on my head and danced the strip on the couch while singing `Don't Come around here no more'. I didn't mean to break Jan's Walkman and don't know why Jan would sue me for Sodomy.

I don't remember calling Bill's wife a Hot horse---even though she looked like one with red eye shadow and purple lipstick!

And when I threw up on Rhona's husband's tit, it was only because I ate too much of that rice.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Ford through my neighbor's bedroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a horny dog and have me arrested for rpae!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all stinky and wet. And I'm really not to blame for any of this slippery stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and onward yours,
Bk (Really a nice Boy!)

P.S. It's only 3 bucks!

LMAO

 

[Naughty Elf]

bump

 

[Silverlily]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Sherie's Christmas party. It was Karin who spiked the punch with too much Stoli's. I can't help it if I drank 15 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like cranberry.

I thought it was funny when I put Brian's pants on my head and danced the the Macarena on the chaise while singing `Diamonds & Guns'. I didn't mean to break Sherie's camcorder and don't know why Sherie would sue me for assualt.

I don't remember calling Ed's wife a stupid cow---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and orange lipstick!

And when I threw up on Terri's husband's rump, it was only because I ate too much of that caviar.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Corvette through my neighbor's parlor. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a tight cat and have me arrested for battery!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all false and lethargic. And I'm really not to blame for any of this cold stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and slowly yours,
Silverlily (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 75 bucks!

 

[Cerberus666]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at casandra's Christmas party. It was carl who spiked the punch with too much vodka. I can't help it if I drank 9 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like shit.

I thought it was funny when I put heather's panties on my head and danced naked on the couch while singing `like a virgin'. I didn't mean to break casandra's hymen and don't know why casandra would sue me for rape.

I don't remember calling dj's wife a fucking cow---even though she looked like one with black eye shadow and white lipstick!

And when I threw up on pam's husband's leg, it was only because I ate too much of that chili.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my motor home through my neighbor's bathroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a hairless pussy cat and have me arrested for indecent exposure!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all horny and erect. And I'm really not to blame for any of this fucking stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and fucking yours,
cerberus (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It's only 69 bucks!

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

I spent half an hour typing in, only to find it needed to run Java!

Neat trick.

 

[Diablogrl]

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at lavendar's Christmas party. It was modest mouse who spiked the punch with too much milk. I can't help it if I drank 1 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like chanel #5.

I thought it was funny when I put angelboy's lingerie on my head and danced the hokey-pokey on the refrigerator while singing `hot in here'. I didn't mean to break lavendar's dvd player and don't know why lavendar would sue me for petty theft.

I don't remember calling tim's wife a crazy goat---even though she looked like one with white eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on mischka's husband's neck, it was only because I ate too much of that corn.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my ford f-350 through my neighbor's bedroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a woody cat and have me arrested for fraud!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all prickly and soft. And I'm really not to blame for any of this wonderful stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and bubbly yours,
DG (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 500 bucks!

 

[concrete]

is that in american or euro bucks?