Admiration

[PyroDemon]

I have to start using more than one word to start a thread.

What is it you admire about your sub? Or do you even? Is it part of what drew you to them? Or am I just a foolish old Dom and should just keep my mind on the whip and discipline and only work on that. This is not just about a relationship, but play too. I of course am subless ( Some would say clueless ), my own choice right now ( currantly under contract with the world as my sub), but I was going over that list in my head of what I think draws me first and makes me admire them the most. Maybe it is a funny idea but for me, it is strength.

I admire the strength of my sub. Mentally, physically and emotionally. And the areas she lacks in, I tend to love even more.To me, that is the challenge, the part that brings me back time and again. To dominate without breaking her strengths, and to lessen her weaknesses. Life without challenge is boring.

 

[soapstar]

I dont know of any answers or formula to follow. Wouldn't it be great if there was a manual?

Subs press 1#
Doms etc

But I never get tired of listening and talking about it.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

I have to start using more than one word to start a thread.

What is it you admire about your sub? Or do you even? Is it part of what drew you to them? <snip> I was going over that list in my head of what I think draws me first and makes me admire them the most. Maybe it is a funny idea but for me, it is strength.

I admire the strength of my sub. Mentally, physically and emotionally. And the areas she lacks in, I tend to love even more.To me, that is the challenge, the part that brings me back time and again. To dominate without breaking her strengths, and to lessen her weaknesses. Life without challenge is boring.

I would tend to agree with you, for myself. I think perhaps there are as many answers to your question as there are Dominants. Each of us, whether PYL or pyl, has his/her own preferences, desires, and needs, and looks for the person we feel will best meet them.

Personally, what attracts me is strength of mind and strength of a sense of self. As far as strength of mind, she must be able to think, and to reason. Though I rely strongly on logic in most of my reasoning, I don't insist that she do so as well - just that she be able to understand and explain (to some extent, at least) how she comes to a conclusion or decision. In strength of self, that's a more nebulous area - but for me it means that she has a good sense of what it is that she wants and needs to fulfill herself, and in what ways she can fulfill the wants and needs of her significant other.

A certain vulnerability is not something that would turn me away; in fact, a large need/desire of mine is to nourish and encourage her growth as a person, in any area where she wants or needs to develop her strengths. There is, admittedly, a certain degree of paternalism in my Mastery/Domination. I want to share with her what I have learned, to help her pass by some of the potholes I've mapped in the road of life, to reach out for the stars and have them fall into her grasp.

I've not expressed this clearly or fully, for which I blame my 5 hours of sleep this morning, but I hope I've contributed to the discussion.

 

[NCShin]

absolutely!

I've posted something along these lines before as well, though I don't remember the thread.

I admire her a great deal. In so many ways I couldn't even begin to post about them all.

Her ability to trust so totally.

Her willingness to expose her self so totally. I don't mean this in the physical sense, but in the emotional sense of the word. To let me into the places that no one knows about, the things she really fears and then allow me to bring them to the surface.

Her courage. This is true in many areas not just for BDSM. Hell, she's going to marry me, leave her friends and family and move to a new country. That takes guts!

Her intelligence. She's a smart and savy chick! I love that we can sit down and have disscussions about anything and she has input. Be it tech geeky stuff, world events, history or whatever happens to be the topic of conversation. Can't even count the number of women I've gone out with who were clueless about the world around them.

There is so much more but that's enough to give an idea.

 

[Netzach]

I would like to see a sample contract with the world, lest it tries to kick my ass again in the near future, thank you.

What I admire about my sub/bottoms:

R, who's not really "mine" but a lot of fun and a great friend and maso...

She's had the shit kicked out of her by that big bad world and has come out on top. The things she's gone through have really made her exceptionally mature and aged her soul a lot. I used to think I had more in common with her partner and superficially, I do, but I think that over time I've found more respect for her and more in common than with a lot of people.

G - my misbegotten soulmate. We finish each others sentences. I've never seen a brain that can hold that much or work that fast. G is the exemplar when you talk about a "lone wolf" a person who stands outside the fray as the rest of us get paranoid about our reputations, try to gain valor points and get noticed. G just is. G just knows the things he's done and that's enough for this massive self confidence. The only man I really enjoyed switching with ever, only I know he doesn't like being my Dom as much as I liked it. So, being his Domme becomes another kind of gift, I'll sublimate and give him a chance to NOT have to make the decisions and to lie there and undergo whatever I want.

M - my not-misbegotten soulmate. If stars are crossed with others, they are totally uncrossed with him. M fell into my life as naturally as my ex had long ago, only this time perverted poly and bi, cute to boot. He calms me. He calms everyone around him with a bad joke and a sweet, gentle demeanor. Keep your 999 rules of submissive conduct, keep your humiliation sluts who will "do anything"...while M has limits and serious stipulations on what perverse things he's willing to do, he absolutely *lives* to make me happy in all the small and undervalued ways.

Cats and old people love him, and that's reason enough for me.

 

[Quint]

That was quite beautiful.

 

[Miss Oatlash]

My Slave

What I admire most about my slave is his untiring dedication to my pleasure. He will do anything I ask, without question and without hesitation. He makes me feel like a Goddess (which, of course, I am!)

 

[MissTaken]

His values and his conviction to those values. He is a man of honor.

Then, his commitment to his family. He is a father who loves his children and goes to the nth degree to be a good dad.

Then, his eyes, his smile, and his bootie.



Then, I got to know him really well! Now, I admire him for so many reasons, I am not sure I can share them all here. At the crux of it all is that he has the fortitude to be true to himself and true to those he cares for. I consider myself blessed that it is I that he loves and adores.

 

[Scarlett_t2]

LH is one of the strongest, brutally honest, has more integrity than anyone I have ever met...he is true even when he is wrong...but then there is the side of him I only get to see when he is vulnerable and needs me to quinch his pain...when he dosn't have to be all everyone expects and that is the most wonderful gift...one I treasure...and he will always be my heart.

My Merry is a pure of heart as they come...she is soft and child like and trusts with all she has. ..She has no fear of me and loves me with a passion and honesty I am only beginning to understand. She is neverending and soothes me. Quinching something in me only she can.

I am lucky where I can have all of the parts of my heart and mind fulfilled and satisfied.....it has been an incrediable journey....and I can't wait to see where else we will go...I don't think words can express how wonderful they both are.
S