A weighty issue

[HottieMama]

Jade....i wish you could see yourself through the eyes of those of us that wish we could look like you.

You are stunning.

 

[LittleJade]

Jade....i wish you could see yourself through the eyes of those of us that wish we could look like you.

You are stunning.

Thank you, HM...

I appreciate the comment... and I appreciate the kindness of it.

I've felt that way about various plush women who've disliked their looks...


I suppose we are all our own worst critics.

 

[Cherrysweetdeal]

I have started and ended this post multiple times now.

What it comes down to is this:

I am unhappy with my body the way it is. Most days, I manage to fudge my way through hating my body, and have an odd acceptance of it... some days, I can't fathom why anyone would look twice at me, except to berate me, judge me, crucify me for my blubber.

I have lost weight. I have gained weight. I have lost more weight. And I'm always working on it. Sometimes I triumph, sometimes I falter.

I want to weigh less. I work hard to control my appetite, I try to eat healthy snacks, and I do my best to ignore my sweet tooth.

I once signed up for a site called fitday.com, to track my caloric intake and my caloric burn... I got obsessive about it, and went down to soemthing like 700 calories per day... and then someone dear told me to stop checking, that I'm fine the way I am, and that I should just learn to like myself more.

I like myself just fine. I dislike how I look. I don't think I'm ugly- I've got a nice face. But I think my body is ugly... or rather, certain parts of it. I like everything except my upper arms, my tummy, and my gunt. The rest of me, I'm quite happy with. If I could just slice off those parts, I'd be thrilled.

Dieting doesn't work. I'm trying to be more active, I'm going for more walks, and I'm working hard at the food thing again... but I will be going for a consultation with a bariatric surgeon in September. I've had this appointment on my books for over a year... and even after the consultation, I probably won't get to have the surgery for another two years.

I hope to be able to lose enough weight before that point, that the surgery would become obsolete, in my case... but, there you have it.

Someone lovely once asked me why I comment on my own appearance so much. After an emotional discussion, I broke down with "because once, I was so fit, so strong, even though I was chubby... and I look at what I am now, and HATE myself for it... "

I don't like feeling like that.

So.

Obsession is never a good thing and I know how that feels, as to the hating yourself, even smaller people hate themselves and it is hard to get past that emotion.

There can only be so many times when a person will tell themselves that they are not worth what other people know they are worth. Personally I still have problems but the only way to get past it is get help and honestly you are a very beautiful girl and you seem like you have a desire to get better.

Just know that this is support for those days that you don't feel you can make it, everyone on here wants to get better and all of us no matter size or shape(and yes round is a shape) will make our goals if we desire to.

 

[LittleJade]

Obsession is never a good thing and I know how that feels, as to the hating yourself, even smaller people hate themselves and it is hard to get past that emotion.

There can only be so many times when a person will tell themselves that they are not worth what other people know they are worth. Personally I still have problems but the only way to get past it is get help and honestly you are a very beautiful girl and you seem like you have a desire to get better.

Just know that this is support for those days that you don't feel you can make it, everyone on here wants to get better and all of us no matter size or shape(and yes round is a shape) will make our goals if we desire to.

Thank you... very much.

Once upon a time, I spent two years throwing up everything I ate. On bad days, I sometimes feel the need to do it again. But I don't. I restrain myself.

*sigh*

Anyway.

Thank you.

 

[malinborn]

When we first started dieting.. we did two different diets... one was a low salt/no salt diabetic style diet and it worked but the food was so bland it was.. well bland.. and to give it any taste seemed to burn Fi's tongue so we swiched over to Atkins... i know... may of you will Boo at that.. but it works for us... and we did it and it worked... but only for so long before our bodies said... do more and so will i... so we ended up walking... to a dvd but walking.. and when that stopped working we joined a gym... and that has done wonders.

right now we're plateaued but are coming back, i think, with a new understanding of what to do to get back on track, but also working out we're gaining muscle... anyway.. the point is... the key point... if you try, and you try and it doesn't work.. then surgery is an option. That's always my biggest question with it.. people who go for surgery without even trying first

A friend of Fi and I may be getting the lap band surgery because as much as he tries it is not working and it's effecting his diabetes.

good luck and i hope you find something that works

I have started and ended this post multiple times now.

What it comes down to is this:

I am unhappy with my body the way it is. Most days, I manage to fudge my way through hating my body, and have an odd acceptance of it... some days, I can't fathom why anyone would look twice at me, except to berate me, judge me, crucify me for my blubber.

I have lost weight. I have gained weight. I have lost more weight. And I'm always working on it. Sometimes I triumph, sometimes I falter.

I want to weigh less. I work hard to control my appetite, I try to eat healthy snacks, and I do my best to ignore my sweet tooth.

I once signed up for a site called fitday.com, to track my caloric intake and my caloric burn... I got obsessive about it, and went down to soemthing like 700 calories per day... and then someone dear told me to stop checking, that I'm fine the way I am, and that I should just learn to like myself more.

I like myself just fine. I dislike how I look. I don't think I'm ugly- I've got a nice face. But I think my body is ugly... or rather, certain parts of it. I like everything except my upper arms, my tummy, and my gunt. The rest of me, I'm quite happy with. If I could just slice off those parts, I'd be thrilled.

Dieting doesn't work. I'm trying to be more active, I'm going for more walks, and I'm working hard at the food thing again... but I will be going for a consultation with a bariatric surgeon in September. I've had this appointment on my books for over a year... and even after the consultation, I probably won't get to have the surgery for another two years.

I hope to be able to lose enough weight before that point, that the surgery would become obsolete, in my case... but, there you have it.

Someone lovely once asked me why I comment on my own appearance so much. After an emotional discussion, I broke down with "because once, I was so fit, so strong, even though I was chubby... and I look at what I am now, and HATE myself for it... "

I don't like feeling like that.

So.

 

[LittleJade]

When we first started dieting.. we did two different diets... one was a low salt/no salt diabetic style diet and it worked but the food was so bland it was.. well bland.. and to give it any taste seemed to burn Fi's tongue so we swiched over to Atkins... i know... may of you will Boo at that.. but it works for us... and we did it and it worked... but only for so long before our bodies said... do more and so will i... so we ended up walking... to a dvd but walking.. and when that stopped working we joined a gym... and that has done wonders.

right now we're plateaued but are coming back, i think, with a new understanding of what to do to get back on track, but also working out we're gaining muscle... anyway.. the point is... the key point... if you try, and you try and it doesn't work.. then surgery is an option. That's always my biggest question with it.. people who go for surgery without even trying first

A friend of Fi and I may be getting the lap band surgery because as much as he tries it is not working and it's effecting his diabetes.

good luck and i hope you find something that works

*hugs*

Thank you, sweetheart.

 

[Homburg]

Damn Homburg, 385# is a lot. I get the same feeling with 225. I'm not a big guy though. Only 5' 6" and I have to struggle with arm length to even get the bar off the supports without a spotter.

385# is an okay squat. I should be doing more. And, honestly, I can't hit legal depth with it right now. REALLY irritating. I've been concetrating on my bench lately (my worst of the big three by far) and have had phenomenal success with it. As a result, my squat and deadlift have lost some ground. I will be able to make it up, but it still ticks me of that I'm only able to hit legal depth with 365#, and that my deadlift won't go past 415# right now. 435# is nailed to the floor.

Still, 5'6" is not a problem, brother. The best olympic lifters in the world (think Suleimeynov, or however you spell it. He was frikken incredible) are shorter guys, and some of the best powerlifters in the world are shorter guys as well. It's all about working with your leverages. At your height, and looking at your photo av, I guarantee you weigh far less than I do, so 225# will mean more to you than it would to me. Lift coefficient means a LOT. I had a coupla guys lifting with me that were stronger pound for pound than I was. Whenever they got discouraged I broke out the calculator and proved it. Yeah, my big ass can pull more than they could, but I've got more to pull with.

And, frankly, you would probably kill me in pull-ups. Pull-ups are my clown.

 

[WriterDom]

Pull ups are a good idea. We have one of those cheater machines where you can counterweight dips or pull ups. I do over 30 dips when I work triceps with no counterweight but haven't tried a pull up since high school. I do believe the hard things, like benching, squats, dips, and pull ups give you the most benefits.

 

[Desdemona]

Have you talked with anyone who has actually experienced life after bariatric surgery

I generally lurk, but this subject is close to my heart. I have been there and done that. Please be very sure that you are mentally/emotionally ready before you undertake bariatric surgery. Be sure it isn't just about body image. Truly, you trade one set of issues for another and if you aren't ready, there will be trouble. This is about long term health. Surgery, like any other long term successful weight loss plan, involves lifestyle changes. It is not the easy way out of weight problems.

Having said that, I would still have weight loss surgery again today because my health (both physical and emotional) has improved dramatically. I can do things today that I never could before. My overall health is incredible. In terms of exercise, I couldn't before I lost the weight. It hurt in a bad way and my body would not allow it. Now, I can walk, run, climb stairs, dance, etc. But that's after losing a significant amount of weight.

I traded the problems associated with obesity for significant dietary restrictions and the need for daily nutritional supplements. If I deviate from the diet and vitamin/mineral supplements, I pay a price and it isn't fun. I live with the effects, both good and bad, of the surgery every day of my life. That will never change. This is true for all weight loss surgery patients.

Feel free to PM me for detailed discussion.

What it comes down to is this:

I am unhappy with my body the way it is. Most days, I manage to fudge my way through hating my body, and have an odd acceptance of it... some days, I can't fathom why anyone would look twice at me, except to berate me, judge me, crucify me for my blubber.

I have lost weight. I have gained weight. I have lost more weight. And I'm always working on it. Sometimes I triumph, sometimes I falter.

I want to weigh less. I work hard to control my appetite, I try to eat healthy snacks, and I do my best to ignore my sweet tooth.

Dieting doesn't work. I'm trying to be more active, I'm going for more walks, and I'm working hard at the food thing again... but I will be going for a consultation with a bariatric surgeon in September. I've had this appointment on my books for over a year... and even after the consultation, I probably won't get to have the surgery for another two years.

I hope to be able to lose enough weight before that point, that the surgery would become obsolete, in my case... but, there you have it.

I don't like feeling like that.

So.

 

[Homburg]

Pull ups are a good idea. We have one of those cheater machines where you can counterweight dips or pull ups. I do over 30 dips when I work triceps with no counterweight but haven't tried a pull up since high school. I do believe the hard things, like benching, squats, dips, and pull ups give you the most benefits.

30 dips would take me a loooong time. Dips are an awesome exercise, though I'm not as bad at them as I am with pull-ups.

I totally agree with you on the money moves. Big compound movements are the way to go, unless you're working to correct serious imbalances.

 

[LittleJade]

I generally lurk, but this subject is close to my heart. I have been there and done that. Please be very sure that you are mentally/emotionally ready before you undertake bariatric surgery. Be sure it isn't just about body image. Truly, you trade one set of issues for another and if you aren't ready, there will be trouble. This is about long term health. Surgery, like any other long term successful weight loss plan, involves lifestyle changes. It is not the easy way out of weight problems.

Having said that, I would still have weight loss surgery again today because my health (both physical and emotional) has improved dramatically. I can do things today that I never could before. My overall health is incredible. In terms of exercise, I couldn't before I lost the weight. It hurt in a bad way and my body would not allow it. Now, I can walk, run, climb stairs, dance, etc. But that's after losing a significant amount of weight.

I traded the problems associated with obesity for significant dietary restrictions and the need for daily nutritional supplements. If I deviate from the diet and vitamin/mineral supplements, I pay a price and it isn't fun. I live with the effects, both good and bad, of the surgery every day of my life. That will never change. This is true for all weight loss surgery patients.

Feel free to PM me for detailed discussion.

The bariatric surgeon recommended that I join a discussion group, to familiarize myself with what people go through- physically, emotionally, etc... and I've been posting with those people for almost a year now. Once I have the consultation, it'll be about 2 years, before I get to have the surgery. Part of the reason is because there are so few bariatric surgeons here, but part of it is that he WILL NOT perform the surgery without the patient undergoing massive physical, and psychological testing, and without the patient having lots of access to counselling, support, etc.

I know that there will be huge restrictions, and I know that it's going to be tough... but I want to be able to run after my future children, and I want to be able to excercise without the horrible physical pain in my back, that I have now.

As I said, I am working on not having to need the surgery... but with 120 lbs that I'd like to lose... it's a heck of a journey.

 

[WriterDom]

As I said, I am working on not having to need the surgery... but with 120 lbs that I'd like to lose... it's a heck of a journey.

You can do it. Just one pound at a time.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I would also second the being in a good place before opting for surgery to lose weight. It is possible with some surgeries to still put the weight back on, as well as introduce new problems by doing so, if you are not prepared to change your dietary choices and lifestyle significantly. Having known someone who recently went through band surgery to lose weight, and also corrective surgery to remove the after effects of losing so much weight, and nearly died due to complications during both surgeries, it is not as easy an option as it sounds first off for some, nor to be taken lightly.

Catalina

 

[Desdemona]

The bariatric surgeon recommended that I join a discussion group, to familiarize myself with what people go through- physically, emotionally, etc... and I've been posting with those people for almost a year now. Once I have the consultation, it'll be about 2 years, before I get to have the surgery. Part of the reason is because there are so few bariatric surgeons here, but part of it is that he WILL NOT perform the surgery without the patient undergoing massive physical, and psychological testing, and without the patient having lots of access to counselling, support, etc.

I know that there will be huge restrictions, and I know that it's going to be tough... but I want to be able to run after my future children, and I want to be able to excercise without the horrible physical pain in my back, that I have now.

As I said, I am working on not having to need the surgery... but with 120 lbs that I'd like to lose... it's a heck of a journey.

Sounds like you have a good plan and a surgeon who understands the ramifications. I wish you much success on your journey.

 

[LittleJade]

Thank you.