A Sub's Life

[Lizzie_Borden]

Also, in my opinion, if your relationship is full of uncertainty, you're doing it wrong.

To me, a solid relationship is the most certain thing in the world.

 

[His_pet_slut]

A very wise person told me something early on that resonated for me and is really the core of how I feel about my submission. He told me that I knew how to be in control of myself and others which made my decision to surrender that control a true gift. One that the person it was given to should be cognizant of, worthy of and most of all, someone that would value it for the gift it truly is. After all, how can one surrender what they do not possess?

 

[KoPilot]

A very wise person told me something early on that resonated for me and is really the core of how I feel about my submission. He told me that I knew how to be in control of myself and others which made my decision to surrender that control a true gift. One that the person it was given to should be cognizant of, worthy of and most of all, someone that would value it for the gift it truly is. After all, how can one surrender what they do not possess?

Kinda reminds me of this Crowley quote that I love so much: "In the absence of willpower the most complete collection of virtues and talents is wholly worthless."

 

[YourCaptor]

A very wise person told me something early on that resonated for me and is really the core of how I feel about my submission. He told me that I knew how to be in control of myself and others which made my decision to surrender that control a true gift. One that the person it was given to should be cognizant of, worthy of and most of all, someone that would value it for the gift it truly is. After all, how can one surrender what they do not possess?

There is also another kind of sub whos nature is surrender, and they don't posses it, they simply are it.

 

[His_pet_slut]

There is also another kind of sub whos nature is surrender, and they don't posses it, they simply are it.

Ah, so even if one's nature is to want to please, but they have learned to appropriately channel it so as not to be running willy-nilly from one task to another in an effort to please, that is not possessing it? Learning to be more than just the girl who can't say no, whether it be over-committing at work, with volunteer groups or sexually means they aren't 'truly submissive' rather it is just learned behavior?

 

[YourCaptor]

Ah, so even if one's nature is to want to please, but they have learned to appropriately channel it so as not to be running willy-nilly from one task to another in an effort to please, that is not possessing it? Learning to be more than just the girl who can't say no, whether it be over-committing at work, with volunteer groups or sexually means they aren't 'truly submissive' rather it is just learned behavior?

No... I think that's the right answer.

I was quoting you more to add cause of what this thread is about, not to refute. Cause some subs aren't so talented at adapting, and hence have no guard to let down.

 

[His_pet_slut]

No... I think that's the right answer.

I was quoting you more to add cause of what this thread is about, not to refute. Cause some subs aren't so talented at adapting, and hence have no guard to let down.

I see. For me, submission has always been at the core of my nature, however it often led to conflict in my life. I truly would drop whatever I was doing to take care of what I thought someone else wanted me to do. It took a lot of work to learn to prioritize and maintain control of myself, while realizing that did not mean I was letting someone else down. Rather I could better meet their needs if I was calm and organized.

Once I recognized the role it also had in my sexual/relationship life, things became even clearer. Still, since I have worked hard to learn to harness this in a positive way, I guard against giving it fully over in a frivolous manner.

Luckily for me, the Doms in my life have all been of the sort to value a smart, self-sufficient sub with a wide variety of interests and a desire to live life fully. Perhaps like really does attract like.

 

[the captians wench]

I see. For me, submission has always been at the core of my nature, however it often led to conflict in my life. I truly would drop whatever I was doing to take care of what I thought someone else wanted me to do. It took a lot of work to learn to prioritize and maintain control of myself, while realizing that did not mean I was letting someone else down. Rather I could better meet their needs if I was calm and organized.

Once I recognized the role it also had in my sexual/relationship life, things became even clearer. Still, since I have worked hard to learn to harness this in a positive way, I guard against giving it fully over in a frivolous manner.

Luckily for me, the Doms in my life have all been of the sort to value a smart, self-sufficient sub with a wide variety of interests and a desire to live life fully. Perhaps like really does attract like.

Now see, I'm some what simular, except that it's been through my submission that I've learned to prioritize and say "no" where and when it needed to be said. My submission has made me independant.

 

[His_pet_slut]

Now see, I'm some what simular, except that it's been through my submission that I've learned to prioritize and say "no" where and when it needed to be said. My submission has made me independant.

I can see that. In some ways, it has for me as well. I have certainly grown much more confident since learning what submission is and finding out there are people that cherish me for the very qualities others find unsettling. Prior to submission I would never have dreamed I could start my own business. I was content working for others. It really has been a journey back to myself, only better than before.

 

[YourCaptor]

I see. For me, submission has always been at the core of my nature, however it often led to conflict in my life. I truly would drop whatever I was doing to take care of what I thought someone else wanted me to do. It took a lot of work to learn to prioritize and maintain control of myself, while realizing that did not mean I was letting someone else down. Rather I could better meet their needs if I was calm and organized.

Once I recognized the role it also had in my sexual/relationship life, things became even clearer. Still, since I have worked hard to learn to harness this in a positive way, I guard against giving it fully over in a frivolous manner.

Luckily for me, the Doms in my life have all been of the sort to value a smart, self-sufficient sub with a wide variety of interests and a desire to live life fully. Perhaps like really does attract like.

Over time I've had to learn a few things too in order to fit in better. Now no longer a dependent kid I wish I could just drop those things and be more natural to myself, but I find it's not that easy. Kinda sucks.