a question for sadists...

[dolf]

ooo this could get me into trouble...

ok, firstly the past is the past...people mature and learn self control.

but...

*deep breath*

how many have given in to their sadistic urges with an unwilling/not very willing/you weren't sure she was willing partner?
how many have been carried away, perhaps in a nilla relationship, and done something they shouldn't have?
how many have just taken a scene way too far?

i speak/have in the past spoken to a fair number of sadists and a few have admitted to this....the sadistic urges can become pretty strong.

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Simply

showed the "lights on bright" to a partner unable to handle it although, bless her, she did try. i found out what i wanted to know. She found out what she wanted to know. We didn't play like that again.

 

[WriterDom]

Too far for one person might be nirvana for the next. You have to be a bit wary when playing with someone new. One can enter top space and disconnect from the scene. And it is very easy for a bottom to become completely absorbed and unable to communicate. The end result isn’t pretty.

 

[Liana26]

I asked Tyler and put his vote in for "yes, in a scene." But that's no one's fault really. In fact, I don't know if that information's really accurate because in my opinion, he could only go too far if he ignored my safety word, which he never has.

 

[TaintedB]

Just wanted to say I like the purple dog. Very nice AV!

 

[dolf]

Just wanted to say I like the purple dog. Very nice AV!

ty
my dog isn't really purple...i just wanted to use that colour paint.

 

[LadyNatasha]

Even with someone you're familiar with, headspace can send you to la-la land and you can lose your sense of touch, so to speak. Only had it happen once thankfully and it wasn't damaging or anything... Just way more than My pet was expecting or wanting.

 

[Marquis]

I voted yes on the first three.

 

[dolf]

I voted yes on the first three.

thank you for your honesty.

 

[Marquis]

thank you for your honesty.

Let me think of an example of each:

I think almost anyone has gone to far in a scene a few times. A forced bi scene got fucked up recently, could've been saved by an earlier withdrawal. It's hard for me to think of a scene where I went way too far, but I'm sure it's in there somewhere, probably a play rape.

I get carried away in 'nilla encounters all the time. I'll try to introduce elements of power exchange into casual hookups, hoping to get a response, and sometimes press issues if they're not rejected clearly.

As far as totally unwilling, this too. I call out to women from my or whatever car I'm in whenever I'm in the mood. If I'm at a rowdy party or club, I will grab women by their belts or pinch their asses to try and entice them to come dance with me.

 

[soapstar]

If I'm at a rowdy party or club, I will grab women by their belts or pinch their asses to try and entice them to come dance with me.[/QUOTE]

Finally a face to the dorky men who do this!

 

[Brinnie]

Too far for one person might be nirvana for the next. You have to be a bit wary when playing with someone new. One can enter top space and disconnect from the scene. And it is very easy for a bottom to become completely absorbed and unable to communicate. The end result isn’t pretty.

if the want to be abused, how can you tell?

 

[catalina_francisco]

I voted yes, in a scene. Almost all human being will at a certain moment in is life lose control. There are many strong emotions which are hard to control and at times impossible. The most dangerous one for me has not to do with sadism but with anger, I do not lose control because of sadism.

I love giving pain and I find it to be sexually stimulating but it has never made me lose control. But I used to have a very uncontrollable anger which has taken me many years to control. It becomes dangerous when I mix the both of them, my sadism can fuel my anger and vice versa if I let it.

In one case I have let it push me beyond that what I find acceptable in a scene. I believe greatly in the control for the dominant partner during a scene, it is in my opinion the PYL that needs to have the judgement to know when to stop and when to push. It has been my experience that pyl’s do not use the safe word when it is wise to do so, because of their need to please their partner. This is the main reason why I feel that PYL’s need to have the judgement when to stop and not rely on the safe word of their partner.

This is what I have done on more than one occasion, not listen to my own judgement but trust the pyl to make me stop when she could not take any more. By now I have learned not to trust solely on safe words, sometimes they are used too soon but mostly pyl will not use them especially if they are trying to court or impress the PYL.

Francisco.

 

[Marquis]

Finally a face to the dorky men who do this!

Come on baby, you love it.

 

[Liana26]

Love it? Not really. Mind it? Not really. If everyone's in a crowded club drinking I don't think I'd care if some guy grabbed my ass. On the street it's a different story. I got my ass grabbed in broad daylight in Spain. So I hit the guy. He got really angry and started following me, all the way into a clothing store. I hid in the dressing room and was so panicky that I forgot how to speak Spanish
(and I'm nearly fluent) when the sales lady asked me what was wrong. It was creepy at the time but made for a funny story for me and my friends the rest of the trip.

 

[Shadowsdream]

close....but I like the edgyness of close...so close to Me is the right place to be...in SOME cases...

 

[Kajira Callista]

close....but I like the edgyness of close...so close to Me is the right place to be...in SOME cases...

meow

 

[Shadowsdream]

meow

Hello pussy cat!

How do you feel about close or over the edge please?

 

[Kajira Callista]

Hello pussy cat!

How do you feel about close or over the edge please?

over the edge for me please....but only if you are comfortable with that of course.
actually i have been in situations where the Dominant when past that invisible safe line....and i remember thinking... more....just a little bit further please! *sigh* and then they stopped.

 

[Shadowsdream]

over the edge for me please....but only if you are comfortable with that of course.
actually i have been in situations where the Dominant when past that invisible safe line....and i remember thinking... more....just a little bit further please! *sigh* and then they stopped.

Very good answer...with magic...there is no edge...total trust...euphoria...TRUST...CONTROL...and RESPONSIBILITY...add a little mind fuck and nirvana!

 

[Kajira Callista]

Very good answer...with magic...there is no edge...total trust...euphoria...TRUST...CONTROL...and RESPONSIBILITY...add a little mind fuck and nirvana!

*melts*

 

[Marquis]

Love it? Not really. Mind it? Not really. If everyone's in a crowded club drinking I don't think I'd care if some guy grabbed my ass.

I am so fucking glad someone said this!

I mean, damn, are we here to party or what?!

AHRIJINAL ROOD BWOI GANGSTA IN DA 'OUSE, MAKE WAY FOR DA BOSSMAN!

 

[graceanne]

I am so fucking glad someone said this!

I mean, damn, are we here to party or what?!

AHRIJINAL ROOD BWOI GANGSTA IN DA 'OUSE, MAKE WAY FOR DA BOSSMAN!

I have never in my life had someone grab my ass at a club. But then when I go I'm with K, and people don't bug me when I'm with him. *shrugs*

 

[TaintedB]

I have never in my life had someone grab my ass at a club. But then when I go I'm with K, and people don't bug me when I'm with him. *shrugs*

Me neither. Maybe we don't live in the right parts of the world. (aka not in Marquis's town .

I've had complete strangers pull romantic crap on me when I've been in bars or clubs alone: stroke my hair, kiss me on the lips, kiss my hand (you can imagine how much I love that last one :/ ), but no sexual touching that I remember.

 

[graceanne]

Me neither. Maybe we don't live in the right parts of the world. (aka not in Marquis's town .

I've had complete strangers pull romantic crap on me when I've been in bars or clubs alone: stroke my hair, kiss me on the lips, kiss my hand (you can imagine how much I love that last one :/ ), but no sexual touching that I remember.

*sigh* On the rare occasion I go out, it's with my sister. The only guys who do that to me are so drunk that they nearly fall over when they try and kiss my hand. ICK And that only happens when I'm out with friends. Like I said, people don't bug me when I'm with K.