A question for doms.

I once had a girl take her clothes off while repeating the phrase, "I don't want this."

That may sound pretty mild, but it was "mean" in the sense that it made her face the fact that she was conflicted about what she was doing: She just didn't want to admit it.
 
I once had a girl take her clothes off while repeating the phrase, "I don't want this."

That may sound pretty mild, but it was "mean" in the sense that it made her face the fact that she was conflicted about what she was doing: She just didn't want to admit it.

Seems very psychological. Creating conflicting messages/actions is cult like behavior to break someone down.
 
10 minuets...

What is the meanest thing you've ever made a sub do?

10 minuets in a cold shower. It does wonders for someone’s attitude.

Or ignoring them. My husband would rather kneel on rice than have me ignore him.
 
10 minuets in a cold shower. It does wonders for someone’s attitude.

Or ignoring them. My husband would rather kneel on rice than have me ignore him.

I am with you Ma’am being ignored is the worst feeling. I hate it.
 
Sometimes...

I am with you Ma’am being ignored is the worst feeling. I hate it.

Sometimes.. well a lot of times, it’s the simplest things. It may not be sexy but it’s punishment. My husband wants my attention, good attention bad attention. It doesn’t matter. So a spanking for example even if it starts with an erection and ends in tears still got him what he wanted. Plus when do I have time to give it..

I can just point to the shower or mouth the word shower. Close and lock our bedroom door and I can watch him. The cold water running down his body. After about 3 minutes things start to shrivel and shrink. Then 5 minutes in you can see a touch of blue. At 7 minuets he’s cold not crying but close.

A close friend suggested I take myself out of the room by making him use FaceTime. That way I could watch from a distance. It’s not often when I look for reasons to punish but I have to admit I really like this idea. Maybe too much..
 
I once had a girl take her clothes off while repeating the phrase, "I don't want this."

That may sound pretty mild, but it was "mean" in the sense that it made her face the fact that she was conflicted about what she was doing: She just didn't want to admit it.

I think that psychological aspect is very appealing to me
 
Isn't that what domination is really all about

It is an element of it yes, but not all of it. It takes different forms, for me the idea of a spanking is hot, but couple that spanking with a telling off and it goes from hot to off the scale
 
It is an element of it yes, but not all of it. It takes different forms, for me the idea of a spanking is hot, but couple that spanking with a telling off and it goes from hot to off the scale

For me the physcological aspect is just as hot as the physical. In some cases more, depending on the individual
 
It is an element of it yes, but not all of it. It takes different forms, for me the idea of a spanking is hot, but couple that spanking with a telling off and it goes from hot to off the scale

The different forms part is certainly true. You can't apply one dynamic to everyone I don't think. I know with spanking my online RP partner the markings left behind are a big part of the experience, because of the psychological mark of ownership. She likes the inner conflict part as well. Not wanting it but finding her body giving in and not being able to resist.
 
For me the physcological aspect is just as hot as the physical. In some cases more, depending on the individual
I agree with you 100% and then some. Often times the psychological is directly linked with the physical even being aroused. I like both physical and psychological methods.
 
The different forms part is certainly true. You can't apply one dynamic to everyone I don't think. I know with spanking my online RP partner the markings left behind are a big part of the experience, because of the psychological mark of ownership. She likes the inner conflict part as well. Not wanting it but finding her body giving in and not being able to resist.

That inner conflict part is huge for me also, as is the mental side of being challenged on that openly....
 
That inner conflict part is huge for me also, as is the mental side of being challenged on that openly....

How do you most like to be "challenged" out of curiosity? I'm now just thinking of an early RP scene we did where the sub was resisting me at first then I taunted her about how wet she was for me and made her admit out loud that she belongs to me. The moment when she finally did, yeah, that was pretty hot, for us both...
 
How do you most like to be "challenged" out of curiosity? I'm now just thinking of an early RP scene we did where the sub was resisting me at first then I taunted her about how wet she was for me and made her admit out loud that she belongs to me. The moment when she finally did, yeah, that was pretty hot, for us both...

That is pretty much spot on, using my body responces against me,making me admit to it, but not finishing it there,making me explicit in what i have to say or making me write it down or video it etc
 
I'd say the meanest thing I did was sleep with my dates younger brother, they were all adults but young and naieve to think I would hang around after one night, they called me the next day and said I was just a slut..something about beating a player at his own game really gets me off. The sex was great but their attitudes needed adjusting.
 
Seems very psychological. Creating conflicting messages/actions is cult like behavior to break someone down.

It wasn't about "breaking her down" in the sense of making her tractable.

She was conflicted about what she was doing, but she wasn't willing to admit it to herself. Frankly, I couldn't just sit back and be part of that lie.

Let me hasten to say that her situation was different from most, at least in my experience. A lot of people come to D/s with different conflicts (very often having to do with sexuality, as you might imagine), but they come wanting to *explore* those conflicts in the context of D/s.

Those are the ones I'm happy to help, when I can.
 
10 minuets in a cold shower. It does wonders for someone’s attitude.

Or ignoring them. My husband would rather kneel on rice than have me ignore him.

my partner used to ignore me, and thought she was punishing me.
Actually I quite enjoyed it as it allowed me some peace to get on with more important things
 
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