A Question about Strap-on's

[glamorilla]

you should ask saint peter.

he knows all about them.

 

[dizzylia]

I'm feeling inspired now. *goes shopping*

 

[SophiaY]

I'm feeling inspired now. *goes shopping*

I have this fantasy of a erotica boutique with elegant personal service and private fittings; a flute of champagne handed to you as you enter, Satie on the sound system... Haut couture meets Good Vibrations.

 

[kaboom3d]

I have this fantasy of a erotica boutique with elegant personal service and private fittings; a flute of champagne handed to you as you enter, Satie on the sound system... Haut couture meets Good Vibrations.

I doubt that I would ever leave...

 

[kaboom3d]

My last post was too short. We have been quite busy and so I have been unable to give this thread the attention it deserves. My first order of business is to thank all those wonderful people who took the time to answer Apple's questions. That is one of the joys of this group, being able to receive advice and direction on such a personal subject.

It would be a joy to visit a boutique of the time envisioned by Sophia. Sit down, have a glass of champagne or a latte, and view and discuss, and view erotic paraphernalia with other women. To be assisted by woman who would act as a personal shopper, a lady that one could trust with with with shopper’s best interest. A sales staff with patience, tact, good communication skills and the ability to build relationships and trust with clients, a staff possessing a strong understanding their products.

Now for my report.
My sweet Apple and I had more fun than could be imagined. Everything worked so well. I found the harnesses, especially the Corset Harness, to be stunningly sexy, even without their attachments. They have a naughty attitude that just exudes sexuality.

It took a little time to learn to adjust the fit, and how to thrust and pump, but that learning experience was short, and fun.. filled with a few giggles.

Our favorite was the Nexus, if you are buying one toy for the both of you, this is the one to get. And it can be used without a harness, and used quite effectively, let me assure you. But the harness would be recommended for some positions, and particularly for the more robust fast and hard thrusting.

Thank you all again, and if anyone has any questions, Apple and I both are at your service.

 

[Jaxbi]

I'm glad you two had an enjoyable time! Made me wish my credit card wasn't maxed out.....or I would have gone shopping!

I do have a minor question, and I hope that you don't mind me asking in this thread.....but it's a strap-on question, so I thought it would be okay.

About thrusting - my partner and I have tried strap-ons, and have had a lot of trouble being able to get close enough for thrusting to work properly. Any suggestions? *have thought of the longer dildo....maxed credit card prevents me from trying that one out just yet*

Or...should we just give it up?

Jax

 

[dizzylia]

I'm glad you two had an enjoyable time! Made me wish my credit card wasn't maxed out.....or I would have gone shopping!

I do have a minor question, and I hope that you don't mind me asking in this thread.....but it's a strap-on question, so I thought it would be okay.

About thrusting - my partner and I have tried strap-ons, and have had a lot of trouble being able to get close enough for thrusting to work properly. Any suggestions? *have thought of the longer dildo....maxed credit card prevents me from trying that one out just yet*

Or...should we just give it up?

Jax

I think most of that comes from positioning. Beyond that, I can't really be specific, since it depends a lot on your harness and dildo. Different lengths, different positions on the wearer, different angles on the receiver, etc.

 

[robbie_boy1]

calls for a fair catch........i am all receiver............

I think most of that comes from positioning. Beyond that, I can't really be specific, since it depends a lot on your harness and dildo. Different lengths, different positions on the wearer, different angles on the receiver, etc.

 

[apple_pi]

I'm glad you two had an enjoyable time! Made me wish my credit card wasn't maxed out.....or I would have gone shopping!

I do have a minor question, and I hope that you don't mind me asking in this thread.....but it's a strap-on question, so I thought it would be okay.

About thrusting - my partner and I have tried strap-ons, and have had a lot of trouble being able to get close enough for thrusting to work properly. Any suggestions? *have thought of the longer dildo....maxed credit card prevents me from trying that one out just yet*

Or...should we just give it up?

Jax

DON'T GIVE UP?

I am happy to answer you question. I want to feel like a bit expert, but alas I am not, still being a novice with all this. I am going to speak for my Sally as well, because we talked about this a lot. I mean it really was fun. And half the fun is talking about it... right?

I have to agree with Dizzy.
Dizzy was one of my go to girls for this information. She knows her stuff.
"I think most of that comes from positioning. Beyond that, I can't really be specific, since it depends a lot on your harness and dildo. Different lengths, different positions on the wearer, different angles on the receiver"

I went wild and as you can find in the earlier post I purchased two harnesses, and three dildos. yes I put out a pretty penny, but I gave the Corset harness to my Sally along with two dildos.
What we found was the shorter was better, shorter thrust, and if you slip out the angel for error is shorter. Also we get a little closer with the shorter.
I would have guessed the bigger the better, but we found it not to be the case.
What we both preferred far and away was the Nexus. Used it with and without the 2-strap harness. If I was to buy one toy of this sort it would be the Nexus. Yes we could get close. We tried it most of the common positions. It was very cool, I have to say it was far better than I would have imagined. I want to add that it is wonderful for making love, not just fucking. That is what pleased us the most.

Hope that helps, maybe you have a lover, and a birthday coming up... I'd ask for it..

 

[Etoile]

Also, one comment - something that I was surprised to learn. Don't feel bad if it slips out. This happens to straight couples too, or anybody involved in the use of a penis. I always figured it was because it's hard to feel what the end of the dildo is doing, but apparently it's a natural part of intercourse.

 

[apple_pi]

Also, one comment - something that I was surprised to learn. Don't feel bad if it slips out. This happens to straight couples too, or anybody involved in the use of a penis. I always figured it was because it's hard to feel what the end of the dildo is doing, but apparently it's a natural part of intercourse.

And all this time I thought it was just my ex that couldn't point his penis straight. Now I find its all men...lol

Truth is Sally is far better at handling a plastic penis then he was a real one...
but then, she loves me

 

[dizzylia]

And all this time I thought it was just my ex that couldn't point his penis straight. Now I find its all men...lol

Truth is Sally is far better at handling a plastic penis then he was a real one...
but then, she loves me

Ohhhh man. That sounds way too familiar.


So often it is the thought that counts, you know. And the lack of thought means lack of count. Hmmph.

 

[Jaxbi]

*grins* Thanks every one for your help.

I think it is positioning, and slight size differences between us in height weight etc that made the positions we were using difficult. One position which worked for me giving....is..enjoyable for her, but it also has triggered some issues/memories that scared her off trying again (which I COMPLETELY understand) for a while at least.

My younger sister works for Joanna G - a company here in NZ that does lingerie, and sex toys - so I will see if she has something in her catalogue similar to the Nexus - because it looks like it would be very enjoyable!! And if not - will pay some more of the credit card and find an american site that will send internationally....and surprise her for our anniversary! *grins*

We won't give up! Thanks again!

 

[chromefreak]

The funny think is that we both were sort of old school and had a belief that the strap on was used only used in porn, because men liked to watch women fuck each other.

Lots of us men like to look over at those mirrored closet doors and watch outselves get fucked BY a woman in a strap-on, too. Some won't admit it, but I will. Something hot about bending over and being grabbed firmly by the hips while submitting. I LOVE being grabbed by the hips!

Now I DO love watching women fuck each other, Hell, I love just watching two ladies kiss each other (Unless it is close to last call at a bar and they're just trying to get attention...I see through that bullshit) But then again I also love watching a woman and a man go at it, or two guys sucking and fucking! hot it hot, regardless!

Seriously, though (Even though I was before, too)...Just explore and do what comes naturally. No problems there! I have been doing that a LOT recently and loving every minute of it.

 

[chromefreak]

Also, one comment - something that I was surprised to learn. Don't feel bad if it slips out. This happens to straight couples too, or anybody involved in the use of a penis. I always figured it was because it's hard to feel what the end of the dildo is doing, but apparently it's a natural part of intercourse.

Don't feel bad at all. I am not the biggest but at 7.5" apparently I am about or above average. When I get agressive with my thrusts (On command) I will slip out for a moment every time...No need to worry, At this point in the game if she's telling you to go at it that hard it isn't an issue grabbing your cock and sliding back in.

Technique depends more on chemistry than mechanical aspects of sex...Way morew. Two people can make almost anything work if the chemistry and/or desire is there.

 

[uptoplay2]

Glad the Nexus is getting some posting time

silence

 

[sows_ear]

Also glad to hear more confirmation that the Nexus can go harnessless.

Do they have model yet that matches the girth of the feeldoe stout??

I have heard a little about this toy.
How do you like the stout?
Are you able to hold it when thrusting with force?
It seems like you would need to keep it held pretty tight, do your kegel muscles get tired?

Please share some experiences.

 

[uptoplay2]

You would have to get a lady's opinion

sorry

 

[sows_ear]

I have friends who have no trouble with ladies... and some can even take men, but many need some help especially with vigorous thrusting. I think any woman would have trouble holding the Stout without help taking a man.

GRIN

Ask Etoile how turning it around with a guy might solve that problem.

As with anything, with practice you might need less help, but ... generally women seem to say that they get so wet with the feeldoe or nexus that they need some support. (on the other hand.... it is quick and easy for a nice slow encounter)

So you have never used the Feeldoe?

 

[Etoile]

I'm feeling motivated to speak up and say something that's been in my head for a long, long time.

I think whatever two consenting adults want to do together is fine. I think using any toy you can think of is fine, regardless of what it was designed for, as long as you're not harming anything or anyone by using it. I think creativity in sex is a great thing. And so is experimentation with new sensations. I think using a toy for something other than its intended purpose can be great too.

However.

I can't help but feel the suggestion that a guy should take half of a double in the ass and be the one doing the thrusting is a bit...invasive. I feel like the Feeldoe and Nexus were created for women to wield. The receptive partner can be male or female, but I feel like a man being the thrusting partner is encroaching on female territory.

Like I said, I think whatever two people want to do is fine. I know the Feeldoe's creators have explicitly supported use of the toy by a man. I don't think that a man doing the thrusting is taking anything away from women, because it's happening in his own bedroom. And yet...as a woman, a lesbian, and a feminist - I still feel like something is amiss in this concept.

There, I've said it...I've been thinking about it for a while. I wanted to speak up. I am open-minded and open to discussion, and I hope those who wish to talk about this will be the same way.

 

[apple_pi]

I'm feeling motivated to speak up and say something that's been in my head for a long, long time.

I think whatever two consenting adults want to do together is fine. I think using any toy you can think of is fine, regardless of what it was designed for, as long as you're not harming anything or anyone by using it. I think creativity in sex is a great thing. And so is experimentation with new sensations. I think using a toy for something other than its intended purpose can be great too.

However.

I can't help but feel the suggestion that a guy should take half of a double in the ass and be the one doing the thrusting is a bit...invasive. I feel like the Feeldoe and Nexus were created for women to wield. The receptive partner can be male or female, but I feel like a man being the thrusting partner is encroaching on female territory.

Like I said, I think whatever two people want to do is fine. I know the Feeldoe's creators have explicitly supported use of the toy by a man. I don't think that a man doing the thrusting is taking anything away from women, because it's happening in his own bedroom. And yet...as a woman, a lesbian, and a feminist - I still feel like something is amiss in this concept.

There, I've said it...I've been thinking about it for a while. I wanted to speak up. I am open-minded and open to discussion, and I hope those who wish to talk about this will be the same way.

Thank you for saying what you did Etoile. I wish I could express myself half as well as you do. What seems odd to me is a man taking so much interest in a toy that is designed for women, to be used by women. I would not ask a man his opinions on which tampon I should use, and I would not ask a man which double dildo use. You are so right Etoile these toys were created for women to wield, it really is strange that uptoplay2 would be so concerned with which toy I choose.

If he would limit his recommendations to which toys he liked to take in the ass, something he has experience with, that would be OK. Although I would find it out of place in this thread, as I began this thread to gather information about straps-on's to be used by me, and my girlfriend, woman to woman. I totally agree, "as a woman, a lesbian, and a feminist" I too feel like something is amiss.

Also
Sows_ear asks a good question, has he ever used the feeldoe?

 

[sows_ear]

uptoplay2 is a guy????? lol
Who would have thought?

I am having the crazy image of uptoplay2 with the feeldoe in his ass, trying to fuck his partner in the ass, butt to butt. I'd almost pay to see that.. lol

 

[Etoile]

I am having the crazy image of uptoplay2 with the feeldoe in his ass, trying to fuck his partner in the ass, butt to butt. I'd almost pay to see that.. lol

It's perfectly plausible, although I think the idea was more that a guy would be on all fours with the dildo sticking out behind him, and the woman could fuck herself on it in whatever way she chose. I think it was more about making the man submissive, like his penis wasn't good enough. Which is totally fine, and I don't find it particularly funny...it's just what a couple might do.

The unsettled feeling I get is more about all the discussion online centering on that scenario. There are Feeldoe-specific threads on BDSM Talk and GLBT Chatter, and this one has turned into one too. I don't care what a guy wants to do, I just feel like these toys were made for women and I don't like losing sight of that.

By the way, this is not my opinion as a mod. Like I said, it's my opinion as a feminist and a lesbian...not a moderator!

 

[uptoplay2]

sorry..... I'll stay away from this thread ladies

emptiness

 

[Baskin Robbins]

Didn't know this thread was only for ladies butt...

My wife has taken me with the Feeldoe Stout and I love it. She didn't seem to have any trouble with it. I'm not a small man, but she's not an overly big woman.

I can attest to the Stout... if you have any questions I'm more than open!