A personal ad

[StormRising]

Thanks but no.

Although I'm still waiting to calm down to make a final decision, I'll probably be deleting my profile there.

All it's doing is highlighting how little in common I have with most of my species. And how unlikely it is I'm ever going to meet anybody.

Oh well, I tried. *hugs* anyway.

 

[rgraham666]

Oh well, I tried. *hugs* anyway.

Thanks. *HUGS*

 

[rgraham666]

That's the end of that.

My profile's been on hiatus for a couple of months. I've been going back about every two weeks to see if there were any messages waiting. Maybe check the matches page to see if there was anyone interesting.

No, and no.

So I deleted it.

Good thing I didn't invest too much time or energy in it.

 

[Boxlicker101]

That's the end of that.

My profile's been on hiatus for a couple of months. I've been going back about every two weeks to see if there were any messages waiting. Maybe check the matches page to see if there was anyone interesting.

No, and no.

So I deleted it.

Good thing I didn't invest too much time or energy in it.

That's too bad, Rob, but it was worth a try anyhow.

I am curious about something. If you had written as if you were a woman looking for a man, using info as close as possible to what you used, how many responses would you have gotten?

 

[rgraham666]

Judging from the comments on the forums, Box, I'd get tons of messages.

Not because the guys in question are looking for a relationship, but because they want to get laid.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Judging from the comments on the forums, Box, I'd get tons of messages.

Not because the guys in question are looking for a relationship, but because they want to get laid.

That's almost certainly true but, even if the "woman" were to advertise that she was looking for a long term relationship, possibly marriage, there would be a lot of answers. Although I have often read articles in newspapers and other items bewailing the shortage of men, I still contend there are more men actively looking for female companionship than vice versa. I don't only mean sexual relationships, either, although that would usually be a part of a relationship that did get established.

 

[rgraham666]

That's almost certainly true but, even if the "woman" were to advertise that she was looking for a long term relationship, possibly marriage, there would be a lot of answers. Although I have often read articles in newspapers and other items bewailing the shortage of men, I still contend there are more men actively looking for female companionship than vice versa. I don't only mean sexual relationships, either, although that would usually be a part of a relationship that did get established.

Oh yes. There are a lot of women looking.

Just not for me.

 

[Huckleman2000]

That's too bad, Rob, but it was worth a try anyhow.

I am curious about something. If you had written as if you were a woman looking for a man, using info as close as possible to what you used, how many responses would you have gotten?

I put a profile of myself on OKCupid, and when I first posted it I mistakenly listed myself as a woman. I had a message within an hour, from some guy a bit older than me in New Jersey, halfway across the country. At first I couldn't figure out why he'd sent me a letter, as I thought I'd clearly stated I was interested in women. I was right about that, at least.

I've received two unsolicited messages from women in the last 3 months.

 

[Boxlicker101]

I put a profile of myself on OKCupid, and when I first posted it I mistakenly listed myself as a woman. I had a message within an hour, from some guy a bit older than me in New Jersey, halfway across the country. At first I couldn't figure out why he'd sent me a letter, as I thought I'd clearly stated I was interested in women. I was right about that, at least.

I've received two unsolicited messages from women in the last 3 months.

From time to time, I get emails from women telling me how they would love to come over and see me so I could eat their pussies. Of course, those emails usually start out something like "Too bad we're so far apart..." I don't take them seriously.

Now and then, I read an article in a newspaper or magazine decrying the lack of available, men, causing so many women to sit home by their lonesome selves. I have always regarded these as being unadulterated BS, and have expressed that opinion on this forum. Outraged women have told me I was wrong, but I have never changed my mind. I arrived at that opinion from my own experience and from what rob has said on this thread and from other anecdotal evidence. I would be willing to be proven wrong, but I don't think it will happen.

One test, unscientific, but a test nonetheless, would be to place a profile on some place such as OKCupid that purports to be from a woman, and place another that purports to be from a man. The two fictious people would have to be equally desireable or undesireable, and would have to have similar goals. I don't know what would happen, but I would be willing to bet a whole year's royalties from all my stories on Lit. that the ad supposedly from the woman would get many times more responses than the one from the man.

I actually did something like that one time but the site was American Friend Finder, and the ads were unabashedly for sex partners. The ad placed by "Red Hot Mama" got hundreds of responses while the one by "Boxlicker101" got none. Of course, AFF is strictly a sex site, and the ads were strictly sex ads, and the response was what I expected. It would be interesting to see what kind of responses ads placed in other sites would garner.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

From time to time, I get emails from women telling me how they would love to come over and see me so I could eat their pussies. Of course, those emails usually start out something like "Too bad we're so far apart..." I don't take them seriously.

Now and then, I read an article in a newspaper or magazine decrying the lack of available, men, causing so many women to sit home by their lonesome selves. I have always regarded these as being unadulterated BS, and have expressed that opinion on this forum. Outraged women have told me I was wrong, but I have never changed my mind. I arrived at that opinion from my own experience and from what rob has said on this thread and from other anecdotal evidence. I would be willing to be proven wrong, but I don't think it will happen.

One test, unscientific, but a test nonetheless, would be to place a profile on some place such as OKCupid that purports to be from a woman, and place another that purports to be from a man. The two fictious people would have to be equally desireable or undesireable, and would have to have similar goals. I don't know what would happen, but I would be willing to bet a whole year's royalties from all my stories on Lit. that the ad supposedly from the woman would get many times more responses than the one from the man.

I actually did something like that one time but the site was American Friend Finder, and the ads were unabashedly for sex partners. The ad placed by "Red Hot Mama" got hundreds of responses while the one by "Boxlicker101" got none. Of course, AFF is strictly a sex site, and the ads were strictly sex ads, and the response was what I expected. It would be interesting to see what kind of responses ads placed in other sites would garner.

I have a picture of me from high school where I look like a woman (Darlene from the Rosanne show, actually). Would that be acceptable?

 

[SimpleGifts]

Regina Lynn at Wired.com has some interesting observations about "catalog dating," her term for trying to find a date from an online personals site.

http://www.wired.com/news/columns/0,72979-0.html

I agree with a lot of what she has said about the topic. One unintended consequence of online dating sites is that they seem to lead to the belief that there are so many people out there looking, you should only give someone one chance to completely impress you, because you can easily throw them back and find someone better. So it really puts the emphasis on being as superficial as possible, because it's pointless to invest a significant amount of effort getting to know any one person. Although, I always thought that the point of dating was to get to know someone at something beyond a superficial level.

My own experience, and those of single friends of mine, indicates that you CAN find someone worthwhile through online ads, but the odds are very much against you, in part because of the type of people who tend to search for a partner using online ads.

SG

 

[Boxlicker101]

Regina Lynn at Wired.com has some interesting observations about "catalog dating," her term for trying to find a date from an online personals site.

http://www.wired.com/news/columns/0,72979-0.html

I agree with a lot of what she has said about the topic. One unintended consequence of online dating sites is that they seem to lead to the belief that there are so many people out there looking, you should only give someone one chance to completely impress you, because you can easily throw them back and find someone better. So it really puts the emphasis on being as superficial as possible, because it's pointless to invest a significant amount of effort getting to know any one person. Although, I always thought that the point of dating was to get to know someone at something beyond a superficial level.

My own experience, and those of single friends of mine, indicates that you CAN find someone worthwhile through online ads, but the odds are very much against you, in part because of the type of people who tend to search for a partner using online ads.

SG

I'm just proposing keeping track of the responses, not replying to any of them.

By the way, my wife and I met through an ad I placed in the newspaper. We have been happily married almost twelve years now.

 

[SimpleGifts]

I'm just proposing keeping track of the responses, not replying to any of them.

By the way, my wife and I met through an ad I placed in the newspaper. We have been happily married almost twelve years now.

I don't doubt that ads can be effective in some cases, but I think that the cases are relatively rare, and that Internet personals are even less effective than newspaper personals (because I believe most newspapers used to charge for their ads, so there was some deterrent against frivolous participants).

The Pew Internet & American Life Project did an interesting study about online personals, and also found that they could be effective. One thing that somewhat surprised me was the study's estimate that only 16 percent of Americans who are single and NOT in a committed relationship are looking for a long-term relationship of some kind. The study estimated further than only 9 percent of single women who are not already in a relationship want such a relationship. Of course, the methodology is a bit squirrely, but it's worth a look.

http://www.pewinternet.org/PPF/r/177/report_display.asp

SG

 

[Boxlicker101]

I don't doubt that ads can be effective in some cases, but I think that the cases are relatively rare, and that Internet personals are even less effective than newspaper personals (because I believe most newspapers used to charge for their ads, so there was some deterrent against frivolous participants).

The Pew Internet & American Life Project did an interesting study about online personals, and also found that they could be effective. One thing that somewhat surprised me was the study's estimate that only 16 percent of Americans who are single and NOT in a committed relationship are looking for a long-term relationship of some kind. The study estimated further than only 9 percent of single women who are not already in a relationship want such a relationship. Of course, the methodology is a bit squirrely, but it's worth a look.

http://www.pewinternet.org/PPF/r/177/report_display.asp

SG

In the case of the newspaper ad that I placed almost 13 years ago, it was free but if somebody wanted to answer it, she had to call a 900 number. Likewise, if I wanted to hear responses, I had to call a 900 number.

I think most internet sites work something like that. You can place the ad for free but if you want to respond to an ad or read responsesd, you have to be a member and pay something to join.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

In the case of the newspaper ad that I placed almost 13 years ago, it was free but if somebody wanted to answer it, she had to call a 900 number. Likewise, if I wanted to hear responses, I had to call a 900 number.

I think most internet sites work something like that. You can place the ad for free but if you want to respond to an ad or read responsesd, you have to be a member and pay something to join.

Match.com is that way. I ran into that a few months ago.

 

[Dar~]

eharmony.com sucks ass b/c it doesn't offer male looking for male or female looking for female.

 

[SimpleGifts]

eharmony.com sucks ass b/c it doesn't offer male looking for male or female looking for female.

Since eharmony was started by a guy who is a Doctor of Divinity, and a fairly conservative Christian at that, I don't find that very surprising at all.

It also doesn't allow you to list your status as "separated." You can only join if you are actually divorced, supposedly.

SG