one_love
Really Experienced
- Joined
- May 1, 2009
- Posts
- 141
To the single female kinksters lurking for amusement, I submit the following.
Nonstarters (to save your time)
You gotta be single. You married girls better stay way! Been there and done that.
No codependants. It wouldn't work. Trust me.
Non-Smoker. Cigarettes that is.
To all those who remain... Hi! How are ya?
What kind of love do you want? Do you want someone who smacks your ass every time they walk into the room? The kind where you know it means both you're my person and I'll be doing that again later tonight. Do you want a lap to rest your head in on a Sunday night while we watch House Of Dragon, the whole time getting softly petted? Do you want to get dressed up and go downtown to drink and dance at least once a month? Do you want to get lost on a mountain hiking trail and make out on the rock behind that fallen tree over there? More? Don't you want to fall asleep as the little spoon until were so hot we separate but still make sure our legs touch? The kind of love where If we haven't seen each other in week or more you know not to wear panties when we do meet. Can you imagine a relationship where after the affectionate newness wears a little the affection stays? Speaking of...when is the last time you felt that NRE? New Relationship Energy. For me...It feels like it's been years. Hence this ad.
Who Is This Guy?
Well I'm mostly living my best life. I'm a business owner, LOVE what I do and and have a clear vision for my professional future. I'm a father to two incredible humans that are starting to not need me as much anymore. I am open to anyone who loves and raises great humans as well, regardless of age. I am divorced but thanks to therapy I'm only partially damaged. I am open to your damage if you own it. I value experiences over money yet I'm smart with money. My love language is physical touch. I'm 41 and take care of my physical self and appearance though I sure wish my hair wouldn't run away from my forehead.
Bonus Points
You know how to roller skate
The thought of wearing a choker excites you
Like spanking and has maybe some masochistic tendencies
You'd rather be outside then watching TV
Live near Chicago
Like Alternative music
Don't like Country music
Dog Person
Are you seriously still reading this?
Were lonely right? No one wants to be lonely. I'm so lonely I gave eharmony $395 of my money and I'm pissed. I hate app dating and sex is important. I like the idea of a cheeky but honest personal ad broadcasted to people who likely don't care for vanilla ice cream. I know this is going probably amount to a whole lotta notta but thats ok. I was bored and it was fun
Nonstarters (to save your time)
You gotta be single. You married girls better stay way! Been there and done that.
No codependants. It wouldn't work. Trust me.
Non-Smoker. Cigarettes that is.
To all those who remain... Hi! How are ya?
What kind of love do you want? Do you want someone who smacks your ass every time they walk into the room? The kind where you know it means both you're my person and I'll be doing that again later tonight. Do you want a lap to rest your head in on a Sunday night while we watch House Of Dragon, the whole time getting softly petted? Do you want to get dressed up and go downtown to drink and dance at least once a month? Do you want to get lost on a mountain hiking trail and make out on the rock behind that fallen tree over there? More? Don't you want to fall asleep as the little spoon until were so hot we separate but still make sure our legs touch? The kind of love where If we haven't seen each other in week or more you know not to wear panties when we do meet. Can you imagine a relationship where after the affectionate newness wears a little the affection stays? Speaking of...when is the last time you felt that NRE? New Relationship Energy. For me...It feels like it's been years. Hence this ad.
Who Is This Guy?
Well I'm mostly living my best life. I'm a business owner, LOVE what I do and and have a clear vision for my professional future. I'm a father to two incredible humans that are starting to not need me as much anymore. I am open to anyone who loves and raises great humans as well, regardless of age. I am divorced but thanks to therapy I'm only partially damaged. I am open to your damage if you own it. I value experiences over money yet I'm smart with money. My love language is physical touch. I'm 41 and take care of my physical self and appearance though I sure wish my hair wouldn't run away from my forehead.
Bonus Points
You know how to roller skate
The thought of wearing a choker excites you
Like spanking and has maybe some masochistic tendencies
You'd rather be outside then watching TV
Live near Chicago
Like Alternative music
Don't like Country music
Dog Person
Are you seriously still reading this?
Were lonely right? No one wants to be lonely. I'm so lonely I gave eharmony $395 of my money and I'm pissed. I hate app dating and sex is important. I like the idea of a cheeky but honest personal ad broadcasted to people who likely don't care for vanilla ice cream. I know this is going probably amount to a whole lotta notta but thats ok. I was bored and it was fun
