A little help...?

[bluebell]

Hi everyone,

I’m a 24 year-old girl and I’m partly glad/partly ashamed that I’ve never had a boyfriend OR sex- I haven’t even kissed a guy (!). Either something in the universe is keeping me from that (which sounds weird, I know- but what else do you tell yourself so you don’t get in a funk about it?), or I am completely uninteresting to guys. I admit, I’m not pretty, more cute- I look like Rainbow Brite- but I’m not scary looking either. I just look...normal; some extra pounds, but that‘s the only turn-off I can think of. I’m definitely not a desperate, clingy girl. I try to have a good life, grow as a person, collect music, be involved in the arts, be independent, etc. In short, I care about who I am.

But I think the fact that boys have never been interested in me is making me wonder if I might be interested in girls instead, or in addition to guys. Not that girls look at me either; I’m apparently invisible to the naked eye.

I kind of get weirded out by thinking of myself dating another girl, but I'm completely turned on by girl/girl sex. I’m afraid of guy/girl sex when I think of myself in the situation. Maybe it's because I feel like I don’t deserve it and I would never be wanted like that by a man.

It’s the sort of thing where you can imagine the best version of yourself doing what hasn't happened in reality, and because of that you're afraid. But I am turned on by straight sex, too. I usually tend towards women sexually, though. Does this just make me “bi-curious”? I guess I want to know what’s wrong with me. Nobody of either sex has wanted to be with me, and I'm starting to believe that I should completely close down in that area.

I’ve been dealing with this for a long time, and I finally decided that I would try to see what other people thought. I can’t talk about it with anyone in my life because they’re all christians, and even though most of them aren’t judgmental (amazing, I know), I just can’t bring myself to discuss this with them.

Help? Advice?

 

[Trombonus]

Hi everyone,

I’m a 24 year-old girl and I’m partly glad/partly ashamed that I’ve never had a boyfriend OR sex- I haven’t even kissed a guy (!). Either something in the universe is keeping me from that (which sounds weird, I know- but what else do you tell yourself so you don’t get in a funk about it?), or I am completely uninteresting to guys. I admit, I’m not pretty, more cute- I look like Rainbow Brite- but I’m not scary looking either. I just look...normal; some extra pounds, but that‘s the only turn-off I can think of. I’m definitely not a desperate, clingy girl. I try to have a good life, grow as a person, collect music, be involved in the arts, be independent, etc. In short, I care about who I am.

But I think the fact that boys have never been interested in me is making me wonder if I might be interested in girls instead, or in addition to guys. Not that girls look at me either; I’m apparently invisible to the naked eye.

I kind of get weirded out by thinking of myself dating another girl, but I'm completely turned on by girl/girl sex. I’m afraid of guy/girl sex when I think of myself in the situation. Maybe it's because I feel like I don’t deserve it and I would never be wanted like that by a man.

It’s the sort of thing where you can imagine the best version of yourself doing what hasn't happened in reality, and because of that you're afraid. But I am turned on by straight sex, too. I usually tend towards women sexually, though. Does this just make me “bi-curious”? I guess I want to know what’s wrong with me. Nobody of either sex has wanted to be with me, and I'm starting to believe that I should completely close down in that area.

I’ve been dealing with this for a long time, and I finally decided that I would try to see what other people thought. I can’t talk about it with anyone in my life because they’re all christians, and even though most of them aren’t judgmental (amazing, I know), I just can’t bring myself to discuss this with them.

Help? Advice?

I know this feeling well. I had my first girlfriend at 19, and lost my virginity at 20, so I was struggling with those feelings before then too. I've always had trouble talking to girls, and I've never been able to tell if one was interested with me. I've only had two girlfriends my whole life. The first lived 3000 miles away from me, and the other had so many emotional problems you don't even want to know. I wondered if it was me for the longest time, and I stayed in both of those relationships way too long because I was afraid of never being in another relationship.

What I've learned this past year is that you have to put yourself out there. Just let go and be yourself, and don't be afraid to show that. Some people may not like it, but you'll inevitably run into people who do. Just be social, get out and do stuff, even if it's just sitting around at your friends place. I've hung out with people more this past year than I did for the entire rest of my life. I turn 25 on the 12th of this month, and I have no gf, and only a small desire to have one. It doesn't consume me like it did. I know that I'm a good guy, and most people think I'm a good looking guy I guess. I know it'll happen for me, and I'm sure it will for you too.

Another thing to do is focus on the positive aspects of yourself. Don't compare yourself to anybody, and don't wish to be something you're not. Be yourself and be haqppy with that, and everything else will fall into place.

Not sure if all that helped, but I hope it did.

 

[bluebell]

I can't stop staring at that little dancing banana

Aww, Tromby...
I have officially teared up.

Thanks so much. I feel like I sometimes nurse my insecurities instead of just getting over it and doing as you say. Obviously, since I felt the need to post in the first place. I suppose experiences like this and like the ones you went through really do make you a different (better?) kind of person, because you almost have no choice but to branch out in some other direction.

With each passing year I've felt closer to just being okay with me and seeing that the people I admire the most aren't the prettiest, they're the ones who are comfortable with themselves. Man, talking about all this makes me see how feeble it looks when I try to put feelings like these into words.

Anyway...

I definitely get kind of freaked out in social situations, though. What do you do when your idea of "putting yourself out there" is hardly that to other people? Do you have anyone helping to keep you out there or is it all your own motivation? Guess I'm rambling now. The point is: thank you. I appreciate it more than you know.
Happy pre-Birthday.

 

[ima6uldv8]

Welcome, Bluebell! I see you like chocolate, too. I think the girl/girl stuff is pretty normal to be curious about. You just need to enjoy being yourself and not stress so much over whether you like men or women. The more sure of yourself you are, the more confidence you will have and that will show itself to others. I wish you good luck on your search.

 

[mrtnmoon]

I definitely get kind of freaked out in social situations, though. What do you do when your idea of "putting yourself out there" is hardly that to other people? Do you have anyone helping to keep you out there or is it all your own motivation? Guess I'm rambling now. The point is: thank you. I appreciate it more than you know.
Happy pre-Birthday.

I don't really have any insight into your questions about your sexuality, but I definitely understand being freaked out by social situations. I was very shy when I was younger.... didn't get involved in any activities at school, only had one friend, yada, yada. my friend let me tag along to prom with him and his date, that was the only school dance I went to... I had one date when I was about 20 and that was it... I was a virgin until I was 36.

one thing that I think helped me was chatting online. it helped me to get over a little bit that fear of talking to people or opening up and letting people see who I am. not that I'm completely "out there" now.... I'm still a bit of a loner at times, still unsure of myself a lot of the time... but I've done a lot of things that I don't think I ever would have done if I hadn't started opening up and trying to make friends, and for me that started online. it's hard taking that online personality out into the real world, so I'm definitely still a work in progress....

my two cents...

 

[littleone77]

(*Smiles*...my pm box is always open. Feel free to use it btw)

 

[eunuch]

Hi everyone,

I’m a 24 year-old girl and I’m partly glad/partly ashamed that I’ve never had a boyfriend OR sex- I haven’t even kissed a guy (!). (snip) ...or I am completely uninteresting to guys. I admit, I’m not pretty, more cute- (snip) I care about who I am.

(snip) I might be interested in girls instead, or in addition to guys. (Snip) I’m apparently invisible to the naked eye.

I kind of get weirded ...(Snip) Maybe it's because I feel like I don’t deserve it and I would never be wanted like that by a man.

(Snip) I usually tend towards women sexually, though. Does this just make me “bi-curious”? (Snip) maybe I should completely close down in that area.

I’ve been dealing with this for a long time, (Snip) I just can’t bring myself to discuss this with them. Help? Advice?

This sounds like it's coming from a much older fart than the not-so-old-fart who is really delivering it.

The one thing my folks' generation never mentioned when they told us to strive, buy, stive some more, etc.... was... "All of this will take some time. Don't rush it. Set about what you want to really do and the things that need to fall into place will do so - in their own time."

It's important that you "try these feeling on" for boys or girls...You do not have to make a decision to go one way or the other. That has already been made - you just think it hasn't.

I married myself a rather rotund, short wife a number of years ago, And, yes, she is even more rotund, louder, and I think she is even shorter. I had done the dating thing for years. Wasted lots of time, spent lots and lots of money, worried about the exact things you mention.

But, when I saw those brown eyes, pretty, impish smile from 200 feet away it was like my lead-lined clothed suddenly slipped away ! I could suddenly breethe more easily than I could breather for 10 years !

We're married 20+ years. Yep, we lead pretty boaring lives 'cause that's what we like. We fight and make up and fight again. No matter what is troubling me I can wrap my arms around her and all of my cares slip away again.

We were made for each other eons ago, we just kept missing each other culling the crowds looking for Mr/Miss Right.

I'm sure good looks or bad you could find some guy to take home and let 'em bang on you. Or some girl to do things only one girl knows how to do to another. That's pretty cheap entertainment and generally washes off pretty easily. You're 24 and lonely. You feel you are missing out on the things friends tell you about: sex, shopping, boys, sex, girls, sex, sex....

What you are not missing is the shallowness and clumbseyness, and down right pointless relations with these other people.

 

[bluebell]

Riding shotgun down the avalanche

Thanks for your answers and support, guys. It's really nice to hear from people who aren't just like, "screw you, that's your problem."
The Playground is definitely worth all the praise it's given. You're all a great group of people.
I can't say that I completely understand what eunuch said, but I think I get the gist...
moon- it's very interesting what you say about taking your online personality into the world. I understand why that makes sense. Onlineland is awesome because you can instantly be everything you want people to see, the stuff it normally takes way longer to get to in the outside. Don't know if I said that right.
Outside can be scary-I know I definitely have social anxiety with large groups of people. But that's a really perfect way to say it, to fuse the two personas.

 

[thump]

I hope everything works out for you

 

[Tuomas]

bluebell, there are a lot of people like you, really. I have severa acquaintences who are several years older who have not had a b/gf yet. Of course I don't know you personally, so I don't know why people aren't taking more of an interest in you. Maybe it's because you aren't taking much of an interest in them.

"Putting yourself out there" is definately a hard thing to do. Even those people that seem to do it so easily find it hard -or at the very least, when they started doing it. Far from being something that deters you, it should be something that motivates you to do it.

Some people are naturally sociable, others have to make a concious effort. I carefully create the image of self-convidence on the outside, that people relate to. You can do the same.

We all wear social masks when we go out in public, images of ourselves that people like -because people really don't want to see the real you. They don't need to. People like the fantasy of the image you create of yourself. And after meeting lots of people, you might eventually find that very rare person who likes who you are under the mask.

As for the girls, it actually quite natural for girls to feel atracted to other girls. Think of all the effort that girls go into trying to make themselves atractive. That doesn't necesarily mean you are bi, or even "bi-curious". But it does mean you have a lack of masculine roles in your life. How do you invision your ideal man?

 

[Trombonus]

Aww, Tromby...
I have officially teared up.

Thanks so much. I feel like I sometimes nurse my insecurities instead of just getting over it and doing as you say. Obviously, since I felt the need to post in the first place. I suppose experiences like this and like the ones you went through really do make you a different (better?) kind of person, because you almost have no choice but to branch out in some other direction.

With each passing year I've felt closer to just being okay with me and seeing that the people I admire the most aren't the prettiest, they're the ones who are comfortable with themselves. Man, talking about all this makes me see how feeble it looks when I try to put feelings like these into words.

Anyway...

I definitely get kind of freaked out in social situations, though. What do you do when your idea of "putting yourself out there" is hardly that to other people? Do you have anyone helping to keep you out there or is it all your own motivation? Guess I'm rambling now. The point is: thank you. I appreciate it more than you know.
Happy pre-Birthday.

Well, for me what instigated my change in attitude was a pretty bad experience. See I have a habit of staying in bad relationships way too long, as I believe I already mentioned. Anyway, my last girlfriend hurt me pretty bad, and we ended up cutting all times. It's almost been a full year since I talked to her, and what helped me through that were my friends. I mean my really good ones. Like I said, I hung out a heck of a lot more this past year than I had ever done previously. I just kinda realized that it just wasn't that important, and that I should focus more on what's best for me and not focus so much on everyone else. Like I said, some people don't like it, but who cares. You can't please everyone, and those people who don't like me obviously don't know me very well. As for getting out there, most of it is my own self motivation. I'll tag along with friends and hang out at their apartments. I don't go to parties though. Not my thing. Just do stuff. Most of the time my friends and I just watch TV, or play video games. Sometimes we do sports or something, and though I'm pretty out of shape, I still go and hang out at least. And if nothing is happening, try putting something together. Sometimes I'll suggest hanging out on the weekend, and people end up doing that. Most of the time these things just kind of happen, without any planning. I don't know, It just kinda happened for me.

Like I said, I've been where you are now, so I'm glad if I helped you out some.

Take care.

 

[WantonWitch]

I guess I want to know what’s wrong with me. ?

Honey NOTHING is wrong with you. We all do things in our own time, at the speed we feel comfortable with.
Just because all the books, magazines, websites and advertising tries to ensure we rush headlong into lust/love, relationship/marriage and all that stuff doesn't mean if you don't there's a problem.

As for others liking us enough to want to spend time with us... we have to like ourselves first and I mean really like yourself, be happy with who you are, this attitude has a positive effect on others when they meet us because we're comfortable( << wrong word maybe, but you get the idea) to be with. Surprisingly even the most confident seeming folks have the same insecurities, they just hide it better or laugh about them ( always a good one that )

As for not deserving it... everyone deserves to be loved/wanted and thankfully men and women both like variety. Not all go for super models ya know... some of them adore us ordinaries/normals. Damn good job or I'd be a Nun (scary thought )

Going out is always a big problem to overcome if you're shy, but like Trom said... make a point of spending time with friends... suggest things to do, like maybe a bowling night once a month... a visit to a club... even a picnic in the park when the weather's warm again. The more you do it the easier it gets, practice makes perfect right ?

Guess what I'm saying is... enjoy life for yourself/itself and you may be surprised at what happens when you least expect it

 

[WaywardWanderer]

Bluebell --

Firstly, welcome...always nice to meet someone new around here.
Secondly, let me applaud you for already "putting yourself out there" by posting your message here. That's a great first step. So many people who are painfully shy simply stay silent -- and that only leads to even greater insecurities. So, kudos to you for speaking up and making yourself known -- we're definitely glad you're here.

Secondly, I totally agree with what WantonWitch said above me -- live your life to its fullest for you -- do what you love and enjoy each moment. When you least expect it, you just might find your "lifelight" drawing people to you. Most of all, don't be on the "fast track"... just take plenty of time each day to smell the roses and run barefoot through the grass just to feel it beneath your toes.

And again -- welcome. Glad to meet you.

 

[bluebell]

Nellie McKay is awesome

Wow you guys, again with the sweetness and the help!
Thank you, really.

I know Tuomas wondered if I took an interest in other people (a completely valid point), and the answer is yes, I do. I think that might be why I am a little sensitive about the lack of response to me as a person. Not that I lose sleep over it when people don't reciprocate, but I think it's really important to try to meet people where they're at and see who they are; to really go out of your way to say "hey- you're a cool person, and I appreciate that." I guess to just put forth the effort is so key in life. It can be a little discouraging when like-minded souls are so far apart.

Maybe another reason I've kind of come up empty with this whole thing is that I'm not willing to be with just anyone. I know Tuomas also asked what I see as my ideal guy, and yeah- it isn't just anybody. Gosh, I feel more and more like Dr. Phil as I type...lord, I hope that isn't the case.
I personally don't feel like I can demand anything particular in the looks department, so that is not a major issue for me. As long as they bathe regularly, cut their nails and don't have unibrows, I'm golden. *laughing hysterically at myself*
Sense of humor is SO important. Meaning, they have to have one. If Herman Munster is funnier than them, then there's a problem (not that Herman was half bad).

Which brings up an interesting question: what are you all looking for? Out of life, out of love, out of yourselves?

Just as a last word to everyone individually: you're a peach!

 

[ShinigamiSama]

I've a similar 'problem'
though mine is more do to physical attraction and time issues

what I've noticed is that I dont tend to think of girls I know 'that way' because of the way they carry themselves
as in just the feeling that they're not looking for someone so it never happens
but when they do start looking and are unsure it really shows

atleast to me

and from what I've picked up here, there and else where. Everybody at one point or another has thoughts about homosexuality.
I have, if only fleeting thoughts

having skiped parts of the thread I've probly made and ass out of my self
not that that takes more a cursive glance at me thouhg

 

[virgin_not]

Welcome to LIT ...and about yourself,I don't see anything is wrong with you.Like already being said in here by some friendly people in LIT just be yourself. To me, the interesting thing about BEING yourself (the way I define it, anyway), is that to do so, you have to stop THINKING about yourself. You live in the moment and DO things. You don't pre-judge them and stifle impulses. I'm not claiming that this is a good (or bad) way to behave. Sometimes it leads to good outcomes; other times to bad ones. One must try to keep a healthy balance between impulses and checks.

 

[WaywardWanderer]

Which brings up an interesting question: what are you all looking for? Out of life, out of love, out of yourselves?

Just as a last word to everyone individually: you're a peach!

Awww, thanks, bluebell! Anyway, as to your question... I'd say what I'm looking for is something you marked as very important -- a sense of humor. Not just in the people I choose to spend my time with, whether romantically or not, but also from myself. I just try my best to see the goodness, humor, and lightheartedness of the world around me. Some days, with events in the world such as they are, it's tough -- but it's definitely what I try to do. I think if I didn't try to keep my eye on "the sunny side", I'd surely go insane. I used to be a very high-strung, stressed-out, often angry and/or sad person. But eventually, I started to notice that all those storm clouds had silver linings -- and now I'm on an eternal quest to always find them to the best of my ability.

I just feel lighter. I know that's an odd way of describing oneself, but I do. I just feel like a ton of weight is off my shoulders and things seem bright, even on the rougher days. I'm also looking not to simply settle. I've done that one too many times in my life, and I've always regretted it. So, no worries -- there's no shame in being picky.

Have a wonderful day -- here's hoping you see lots of silver linings.

 

[ladyadonia30]

Ugly Duckling

I too, was the ugly duckling in school. I did not date until I was 17...lost my virginity to the first and only love at age 18.....first kiss and all. I married him thinking, I'd never find anyone else interested in me. Big mistake...now I am 31...remarried and have 4 daughters. I grew to learn more about ME as I aged.

Girl/Girl sex and kissing is very erotic. It is natural to feel the way that you do. Women are intimate on a regular basis where men, well...they aren't. I once thought I was lesbian because as a teen, dreamed about screwing women...Women have nice bodies....well those in media. When I look at my own...Ew....I wouldn't do me. I befriended a lesbian and she took me to a dyke bar as a joke....the women were more agressive than the men...turn off big time. I had a very lovely woman invite me to her place...I declined more afraid of what that entailed. When it comes down to it...women are nice to look at..and soft lips to kiss....I dare say I kissed another woman..and felt her breasts..but it stopped there. I can't do pussy i fear. I just prefer good ole cock over pussy...

Your situation is the way it is because you don't know what a man feels like. And because I believe you have self image issues, you aren't approachable by men. I was the SAME way..very shy.....wouldn't dare flirt with a man. Now I am 31...and am far more out going than I was in my 20's...and sure...I will flirt openly with men......you have to be approachable though..or they will fear you...

 

[de-valmont]

I'd just first like to say welcome to lit the people here are good folks.

On the issue, I know it's somethig of cliche, but just be yourself, don't feel pressured by your peers and dont think of yourself as unattractive to other people, you most certainly are not. You are not invisible but there'a good chance that someone who is attracted to you is simply too shy to have ever mentioned it and hides it too well.

As for the girl/girl/ girl/boy thing, don't let it worry you, be relaxed and enjoy just being what you are, be proud of yourself and of your thoughts and don't try to catagorise yourself into a box for easy labelling, there really is no point you are the woman you are, not a category of sexuality, an individual.

There is nothing wrong with you, maybe you lack a little confidence but that isn't something wrong, it's just a part of life, everyone has times like that. When you look at yourself in the mirror, smile, and remember that you are the only YOU on the planet, and that the planet is richer for your presence there.

Good luck with everything and don't worry about a thing, just enjoy life however it comes along.

 

[Tuomas]

I know Tuomas wondered if I took an interest in other people (a completely valid point), and the answer is yes, I do. I think that might be why I am a little sensitive about the lack of response to me as a person. Not that I lose sleep over it when people don't reciprocate, but I think it's really important to try to meet people where they're at and see who they are; to really go out of your way to say "hey- you're a cool person, and I appreciate that." I guess to just put forth the effort is so key in life. It can be a little discouraging when like-minded souls are so far apart.

Maybe another reason I've kind of come up empty with this whole thing is that I'm not willing to be with just anyone. I know Tuomas also asked what I see as my ideal guy, and yeah- it isn't just anybody. Gosh, I feel more and more like Dr. Phil as I type...lord, I hope that isn't the case.
I personally don't feel like I can demand anything particular in the looks department, so that is not a major issue for me. As long as they bathe regularly, cut their nails and don't have unibrows, I'm golden. *laughing hysterically at myself*
Sense of humor is SO important. Meaning, they have to have one. If Herman Munster is funnier than them, then there's a problem (not that Herman was half bad).

Which brings up an interesting question: what are you all looking for? Out of life, out of love, out of yourselves?

Just as a last word to everyone individually: you're a peach!

The reason I asked if you demonstrated interest in other people -aside from the fact that you opened a topic about youself D)- is because I got the impression you expected the guy to contact you, and not the other way around. I don't think you are ugly -unlike a couple of other posters here - but think that a lot of people around you percieve you as not open to a relationship. This is quite common. Again, since I don't know you personally, i can't really say, but I would point out that it's rather hard for guys to ask girls out. There is the whole nervous thing, plus fear of regection, etc, that most guys will never, ever confess to. So, it's always nice if you can help them over that (not an easy thing to do, either )

Being demanding in your search is very good. Too many people have sad stories of when they just settled for what was available. So maybe you were single for an extra few years, but in the end it probably will work out for you finding the guy you will get along with best. A sense of humor is always important, but there are other qualities as well. I did not mean physical appearance, but rather, more along the lines of how would you like your SO to relate to you... what personal atributes would you find rewarding in a relationship with a man? And then you can start from there

And, considering you mention Herman Munster.... what's your favorite band?

 

[El_Cazador999]

What I've learned

Bluebell,

It's difficult for some people to relate to your situation. I've always been overly blessed with confidence, not bad looking according to the women I've been around and with, and had sex for the first time when I was...well 18 for lit purposes, but it was a lot younger than that.

What I have learned over the years is that great looks don't always translate into great lovers. Some of the worst sex (if there is such a thing) have been with some of the most beautiful women. Some of the best has been with women that most guys wouldn't give a passing glance. There are, out there, guys and girls that don't judge people on looks alone. I've also found that most people are their own worst critics so I would venture to guess that you're a lot more pleasing to the eye than you think you are.

There are two things that work, I think. Confidence in yourself. When you are, people notice. Second is don't force it. I've found some of the greatest partners when I wasn't looking. Getting hit up the side of the head can be a lot of fun sometimes.

And, lastly, I wish you lived close by so I could prove to you that you have nothing to worry about and so I could teach you to love yourself.

 

[bluebell]

Yay for haircuts

Oh my gosh, you guys. I'm on the verge of tears here- you are ALL SO WONDERFUL!
I have to tell you that I've posted on other discussion boards (music boards) and went away feeling completely scalded by the experience because the people who responded to me were so bitter and close-minded.
You people rock my socks. Seriously. Thank you.

Tuomas, you bring up an interesting point about the guys being the initiators. I'm sure it's not fair to demand that someone else always be the one to go out on the limb and never yourself (meaning girls always thinking guys should be the aggressors, etc). I think that even though it would be preferable to me (considering my lack of experience) to have the guy be the initiator at first, I would do some of my own pursuing under the right circumstances. Of course, that does come down to confidence- the key word on Sesame Street right now.
And music? Oh dear- what a large topic. I hate to sound all uppity, but I kind of don't have a favorite band. It sort of goes in waves for me, changing almost by the hour. I'm partial to singer/songwriters. But right this second I'm geeking out about Nellie McKay's new album "Pretty Little Head", Scissor Sisters "Tah-Dah", and Fiona Apple's "Extraordinary Machine".
Gosh, I hope that wasn't a joke you were making with me and I completely misunderstood it. Oh well!

Wanderer- I completely agree about the sense of humor thing. I don't know how people can live without seeing the world like that. It just gets too serious and I would rather laugh about it. It really helps to keep things in perspective.

Cazador and the rest of you- you're very very sweet

 

[WaywardWanderer]

Glad to hear we've all helped in our own little ways, bluebell -- glad to do it! I'm sure I speak for everybody here when I say you're pretty awesome in our books.

Have a wonderful, wonderful weekend, and don't forget to have a laugh or six.

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

I wish that I knew just the right words to say to you,but I don't.Just be you,be yourself.I know it sounds like MOM advice,but it is true.
I'm sure there are plenty of people attracted you.Perhaps some are just shy?DOn't worry either so much with lack of experience.It will happen for you.
Have you ever thought of making the first move?Scary I know,but you may be very happy with the results.

 

[bluebell]

Airbag Dress

Wanted to tell you guys that you've all revitalized my thinking about myself. My best friend even commented about my...fresh willingness to start re-working areas of my life.

There's something supremely gratifying and strengthening to feel that you have so many allies...

And I know I've already said this, oh, about five-trillion times, but I wanted to give one last rousing, chorus-y, raucously-obnoxious shout out:

Thanks.