A Good Dominant

[sweetnpetite]

What makes a good Dominant?

(replies from dom/me and sub both welcome)

 

[pellso27]

Going that

extra step to make sure my sub gets all the abuse she wants

 

[Ms_Lilith]

Care, and attention, and confidence.


The same things go for a good submissive.

 

[graceanne]

Who wants a good dominant?

 

[redelicious]

One sub's idea of a good Dom/me is another's nightmare (and vica versa). You have to decide for yourself what is good and desirable.

 

[Blushing Bottom]

What makes a good Dominant?

(replies from dom/me and sub both welcome)

A good mind and the desire to encourage sexual expression in others less uninhibited.

 

[His_pita]

Like redelicious says it's up to the individual to decide what they are wanting from their Dominate.

For me it’s about him being in control of himself and me. Communication, trust and complete honesty are vital of course.

I need my Dom to encourage and direct me to be the best I can be. To make me a strong, secure, happy and healthy woman. I need the rules to be clearly defined and when I mess up I need him to punish accordingly. * I expect to have a love/hate relationship with the hairbrush *

Mostly I need his love and commitment to our relationship. I need to know that no matter what he is mine and I’m His.

Oh and having a Dom that knows how to give a good erotic spanking is a must!

 

[Starblayde]

It all depends. The sub needs the Dom for their own ends, and vice versa. Compatability and understanding is the main thing, and that's not something you can really quantify.

 

[FurryFury]

I'd say not disappearing would be a HUGE quality I would look for.

*sighs*

Fury

 

[Elayne]

There are four things that make a good dominant.

Confidence. I hate a guy who tries to bill himself as a Dom but comes off as a wimp.

Creativity. A dom controls how a scene develops, so a good dom has to have a sense of style and direction and be willing to make the first move.

Patience. I hate a guy who tries to bill himself as a Dom and then immediately tries to get me in the sack. A good dom has a sense of rhythm and sensuality and takes time to drive me wild and actually dominant me.

Insight. Most subs suck at communication, so the quality that really sets a brilliant dom apart from a good one is the brilliant doms are excellent at reading a sub's body language and tells and working from that.

 

[Marquis]

Patience. I hate a guy who tries to bill himself as a Dom and then immediately tries to get me in the sack. A good dom has a sense of rhythm and sensuality and takes time to drive me wild and actually dominant me.

Something I really have to work on.

 

[Servy]

What makes a good dom? in my opinion.......

Love!

 

[Marquis]

What makes a good dom? in my opinion.......

Love!

Word.

I think love for yourself and love for your partner is all you really need to be a good Dom or a good sub.

 

[CharleyH]

Word.

I think love for yourself and love for your partner is all you really need to be a good Dom or a good sub.

I think the better question is what makes a good sub, and there you will get more serious answers.

 

[Marquis]

I think the better question is what makes a good sub, and there you will get more serious answers.

I think it's essentially the same question.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

What makes a good Dominant?

What makes a good leader?

The answers will vary of course, but some of the things I consider:

Honesty, humility, courage, character, compassion, strength, integrity, discipline, determination, communication skills, patience, even handed, maturity....

The list could go on (and in fact does) but I won't bore y'all with it.

 

[Betticus]

I think that it has something to do with money. I get the feeling that a lot of "subs" are just little whores looking for a ride to easy street with a well off or rich man.

Not saying that anyone here is of course.

 

[AppleBiter]

For me? Cold control, unpredictability, a tongue that can be razor sharp in his words or petal soft against my skin, and of course, a firm hand.

 

[Private_Label]

I think that it has something to do with money. I get the feeling that a lot of "subs" are just little whores looking for a ride to easy street with a well off or rich man.

Not saying that anyone here is of course.

Golddiggers come in many flavor, including vanilla.

I certainly don't care how much of the luchre someone has. For me there has to be a certain amount of personality that makes its presence felt. He has to be comfortable with himself, willing to communicate, willing to compromise (some - more for outside the bedroom than in it), able to have an argument without loss of love...

Wait a minute, that's what I would want from my partner regardless of D/s or vanilla....

 

[Betticus]

Dammit, I was trying to get a good argument going. I'll have to try harder next time.

 

[graceanne]

Dammit, I was trying to get a good argument going. I'll have to try harder next time.

You need a spanking.

 

[Betticus]

You need a spanking.

Is that your professional opinion Dr. Gracie?

I think you need a cookie and a glass of milk!

 

[nusubgurl]

Is that your professional opinion Dr. Gracie?

I think you need a cookie and a glass of milk!

Can i spank you Betticus?? please??? And then it'll be my turn....

 

[Quinn71]

My opinion, most women who know themselves to be submissive would prefer a Man who is in control of His environment as well as Himself. Confidence is very sexy, most women would say..or so I am told. Undo cruelty is not necessarily a true sign of a good Dom. A Man who can temper firmness with tenderness is one Who will hold the key to the submissive woman who chooses to give herself to Him.

 

[graceanne]

Is that your professional opinion Dr. Gracie?

I think you need a cookie and a glass of milk!

Are you trying to wiggle out of a spanking?

Cause that's the right way to do it.