40 things men do wrong

[MechaBlade]

not even a treasure trail?

Well, I'm not Powder. Yes, a treasure trail and mildly hairy arms and armpits. I just meant that my back and chest are smooth like butta.

 

[Devil'sChild]

Well, I'm not Powder. Yes, a treasure trail and mildly hairy arms and armpits. I just meant that my back and chest are smooth like butta.

Don't rub it in. Its not my fault that dad gave me more testosterone then yours did. *curses the fuckin hairy bastard*

 

[killallhippies]

Well, I'm not Powder. Yes, a treasure trail and mildly hairy arms and armpits. I just meant that my back and chest are smooth like butta.

back hair is evil, but so very soft.

 

[RcyMtnGrl]

More than half that list is shit. I won't go into details as to which ones I disagree with, but I counted, and it was more than half.

Stubble is fine. Facial hair is good.

Mmmm Treasure trails.

 

[sortacurious]

That should be, All women can come from anal.

This thread is making me a bit tingly...especially this post. Anal only? Are you certain?

 

[Guest]

~40 things women mistakenly think has anything to do with their pleasure

3) NOT SHAVING.
A man has stubble at some point during the day. That's just how it is. Seriously, I know there have to be some women out there that enjoy a man professional enough to shave for his job, but hard working enough to not be able to shave every 6 hours like some pretty boy.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.
Fuck you, it's my breast now.

5) BITING HER NIPPLES.
Don't complain unless I'm drawing blood.

6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES.
Sex is supposed to be fun for the guy, too.

8) GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED.
Sex with clothes on is hot.

9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT.
Although men should generally dispose of their own condoms, no man likes a woman that refuses to do some housecleaning.

12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY.
"stupid she will look when naked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head." I'm guessing whoever wrote this has never seen a naked woman before. Just shut up and enjoy the erotic comedy that is your half naked body.

13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY.
Once again, comedy is a powerful aphrodisiac.

14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA.
This one is actually right. Men, pay attention: women have anuses, too.

18) GOING TOO FAST.
Shut up until I'm done.

19) GOING TOO HARD.
I said shut up!

20) COMING TOO SOON.
Sex is a race. If you don't come, you have lost miserably.

24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN.
"All women hate this." Not the ones worth fucking.

25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX.
If you don't like the taste of sperm, get fitted for some flannel and go to the local lesbian bar. If you can take tequila shots, you can withstand the taste of sperm.

26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO.
Don't move? She'll do all the work?! Why don't we also ask permission to come? You might as well ask a man this pussified to get rid of his penis altogether.

27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES.
If you don't want it in your mouth, chances are it's going on your face. There is more wisdom in your average porn movie than all of the world's greatest holy texts.

28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES.
I understand. You're out of shape.

But what better way to get into shape? I think I just stumbled onto a new exercise routine. And millions will buy the video.

30) TAKING PICTURES.
Just say "No" if you don't want pictures.

32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS.
One of you two needs to lose weight.

33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES.
This isn't a magazine shoot or a hip hop video. Don't worry about looking cute (unless we're taking pictures). Do what turns us on and you will be rewarded. Threefold, if you're Wiccan.

34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
There are millions of women that love anal penetration more than I do, and I have a prostrate. Anal stimulation feels good because of nerve endings in the anus, you fucking idiot. Some women can come from anal.

35) GIVING LOVE BITES.
"No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves." Actually, some do. It gives them a new secret. Plus, nothing is cooler than leaving your mark on another person.

36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS.
Then get it right the first time.

37) TALKING DIRTY.
You gotta be joking me.

38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES.
Well, it doesn't matter.

40) THANKING HER.
This one is also actually right. Never thank a woman for sex. Just leave a $10 bill on her nightstand before leaving.

*makes a careful note to never, ever fuck Mecha*

 

[killallhippies]

More than half that list is shit. I won't go into details as to which ones I disagree with, but I counted, and it was more than half.

Stubble is fine. Facial hair is good.

Mmmm Treasure trails.

no, facial hair is fucking awesome.

 

[Guest]

dude, if my beard is gonna turn a chick off then it just wasn't meant to be and she can go fuck herself. i like the damned thing.

Nonono,the beard is quite nice. Beards are all brushy and tickley and feel nifty on the insides of my thighs.

Second-day stubble, on the other hand (otherwise known as cactus face) has been known to leave friction burns on my skin. It's not that you can't have facial hair, it's that you've gotta be a little careful where you go dragging it across your girl's skin.

 

[killallhippies]

Nonono,the beard is quite nice. Beards are all brushy and tickley and feel nifty on the insides of my thighs.

Second-day stubble, on the other hand (otherwise known as cactus face) has been known to leave friction burns on my skin. It's not that you can't have facial hair, it's that you've gotta be a little careful where you go dragging it across your girl's skin.

that's great. tell that to all the girls who think they know what beard feels like. i know my beard is generally soft. they don't, but they think they know it's a prickly mess of thorns because they're lazy thinkers.

 

[MechaBlade]

Don't rub it in. Its not my fault that dad gave me more testosterone then yours did. *curses the fuckin hairy bastard*

I wouldn't be so sure. I'm hairy as shit everywhere else.

More than half that list is shit. I won't go into details as to which ones I disagree with, but I counted, and it was more than half.

Stubble is fine. Facial hair is good.

Mmmm Treasure trails.

I like this post.

*makes a careful note to never, ever fuck Mecha*

Meh.

*moves ourlady off of the sex list... and onto the surprize-sex list*

 

[bunnislippers]

More than half that list is shit. I won't go into details as to which ones I disagree with, but I counted, and it was more than half.

Stubble is fine. Facial hair is good.

Mmmm Treasure trails.

oh yeah, well over half... at least for me anyway

i a treasure trail...

who doesn't a treasure trail?

 

[-phreak]

I gotta agree with mechablade.



what about us chicks who like bites to the nipples, rough fucking, throat fucking, biting, scratching, etc?

I feel left out. fuck you.

 

[Paendragon]

i will only say something to the people who say nice things.

I like kittens.

 

[pointless]

who doesn't?

 

[bunnislippers]

I gotta agree with mechablade.



what about us chicks who like bites to the nipples, rough fucking, throat fucking, biting, scratching, etc?

I feel left out. fuck you.

ditto...

 

[Paendragon]

oh yeah, well over half... at least for me anyway

Oh, hell yeah . . .

 

[DivineAngel]

~40 things women mistakenly think has anything to do with their pleasure

3) NOT SHAVING.
A man has stubble at some point during the day. That's just how it is. Seriously, I know there have to be some women out there that enjoy a man professional enough to shave for his job, but hard working enough to not be able to shave every 6 hours like some pretty boy.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.
Fuck you, it's my breast now.

5) BITING HER NIPPLES.
Don't complain unless I'm drawing blood.

6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES.
Sex is supposed to be fun for the guy, too.

8) GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED.
Sex with clothes on is hot.

9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT.
Although men should generally dispose of their own condoms, no man likes a woman that refuses to do some housecleaning.

12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY.
"stupid she will look when naked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head." I'm guessing whoever wrote this has never seen a naked woman before. Just shut up and enjoy the erotic comedy that is your half naked body.

13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY.
Once again, comedy is a powerful aphrodisiac.

14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA.
This one is actually right. Men, pay attention: women have anuses, too.

18) GOING TOO FAST.
Shut up until I'm done.

19) GOING TOO HARD.
I said shut up!

20) COMING TOO SOON.
Sex is a race. If you don't come, you have lost miserably.

24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN.
"All women hate this." Not the ones worth fucking.

25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX.
If you don't like the taste of sperm, get fitted for some flannel and go to the local lesbian bar. If you can take tequila shots, you can withstand the taste of sperm.

26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO.
Don't move? She'll do all the work?! Why don't we also ask permission to come? You might as well ask a man this pussified to get rid of his penis altogether.

27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES.
If you don't want it in your mouth, chances are it's going on your face. There is more wisdom in your average porn movie than all of the world's greatest holy texts.

28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES.
I understand. You're out of shape.

But what better way to get into shape? I think I just stumbled onto a new exercise routine. And millions will buy the video.

30) TAKING PICTURES.
Just say "No" if you don't want pictures.

32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS.
One of you two needs to lose weight.

33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES.
This isn't a magazine shoot or a hip hop video. Don't worry about looking cute (unless we're taking pictures). Do what turns us on and you will be rewarded. Threefold, if you're Wiccan.

34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
There are millions of women that love anal penetration more than I do, and I have a prostrate. Anal stimulation feels good because of nerve endings in the anus, you fucking idiot. Some women can come from anal.

35) GIVING LOVE BITES.
"No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves." Actually, some do. It gives them a new secret. Plus, nothing is cooler than leaving your mark on another person.

36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS.
Then get it right the first time.

37) TALKING DIRTY.
You gotta be joking me.

38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES.
Well, it doesn't matter.

40) THANKING HER.
This one is also actually right. Never thank a woman for sex. Just leave a $10 bill on her nightstand before leaving.

well at least you seem to be honest, must count for something right ?
Not that it would make me want to have sex with you. Very egoistic lover.
But hey whatever works for you I guess

 

[Absolut]

Well fuck me, talk about pigeon holing the whole of the female gender.

The 1 thing you did wrong was to assume every woman was the exact same as you.

 

[-phreak]

Well fuck me, talk about pigeon holing the whole of the female gender.

The 1 thing you did wrong was to assume every woman was the exact same as you.

word.

 

[~Avalon~]

~40 things women mistakenly think has anything to do with their pleasure

3) NOT SHAVING.
A man has stubble at some point during the day. That's just how it is. Seriously, I know there have to be some women out there that enjoy a man professional enough to shave for his job, but hard working enough to not be able to shave every 6 hours like some pretty boy.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.
Fuck you, it's my breast now.

5) BITING HER NIPPLES.
Don't complain unless I'm drawing blood.

6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES.
Sex is supposed to be fun for the guy, too.

8) GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED.
Sex with clothes on is hot.

9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT.
Although men should generally dispose of their own condoms, no man likes a woman that refuses to do some housecleaning.

12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY.
"stupid she will look when naked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head." I'm guessing whoever wrote this has never seen a naked woman before. Just shut up and enjoy the erotic comedy that is your half naked body.

13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY.
Once again, comedy is a powerful aphrodisiac.

14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA.
This one is actually right. Men, pay attention: women have anuses, too.

18) GOING TOO FAST.
Shut up until I'm done.

19) GOING TOO HARD.
I said shut up!

20) COMING TOO SOON.
Sex is a race. If you don't come, you have lost miserably.

24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN.
"All women hate this." Not the ones worth fucking.

25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX.
If you don't like the taste of sperm, get fitted for some flannel and go to the local lesbian bar. If you can take tequila shots, you can withstand the taste of sperm.

26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO.
Don't move? She'll do all the work?! Why don't we also ask permission to come? You might as well ask a man this pussified to get rid of his penis altogether.

27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES.
If you don't want it in your mouth, chances are it's going on your face. There is more wisdom in your average porn movie than all of the world's greatest holy texts.

28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES.
I understand. You're out of shape.

But what better way to get into shape? I think I just stumbled onto a new exercise routine. And millions will buy the video.

30) TAKING PICTURES.
Just say "No" if you don't want pictures.

32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS.
One of you two needs to lose weight.

33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES.
This isn't a magazine shoot or a hip hop video. Don't worry about looking cute (unless we're taking pictures). Do what turns us on and you will be rewarded. Threefold, if you're Wiccan.

34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
There are millions of women that love anal penetration more than I do, and I have a prostrate. Anal stimulation feels good because of nerve endings in the anus, you fucking idiot. Some women can come from anal.

35) GIVING LOVE BITES.
"No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves." Actually, some do. It gives them a new secret. Plus, nothing is cooler than leaving your mark on another person.

36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS.
Then get it right the first time.

37) TALKING DIRTY.
You gotta be joking me.

38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES.
Well, it doesn't matter.

40) THANKING HER.
This one is also actually right. Never thank a woman for sex. Just leave a $10 bill on her nightstand before leaving.

another reason Mecha is awesome.

 

[Absolut]

word.

Pisses me off seeing shit like that, maybe her high school fucks haven't been all she read about in her romance novels but to assume every woman and every man are the same is just fucking ignorant.

 

[Guest]

Meh.

*moves ourlady off of the sex list... and onto the surprize-sex list*

LOL. All I ask is that you not treat my tits like melons and own up to wanting to fuck me in the ass. Can we at least make that compromise?

 

[~Avalon~]

Pisses me off seeing shit like that, maybe her high school fucks haven't been all she read about in her romance novels but to assume every woman and every man are the same is just fucking ignorant.

She may have read it in Cosmo.

 

[-phreak]

Pisses me off seeing shit like that, maybe her high school fucks haven't been all she read about in her romance novels but to assume every woman and every man are the same is just fucking ignorant.

the kind of gentle sex she describes would piss me off no end.

 

[thirty]

i know you guys will probly boo me off the board, or say mean things to me because thats what you GB people love to do because you have no life and some how feel better about yourself when you pick on other people, but i ran accross this blog on a friends myspace page and wanted to share it with you and maybe get your opinion on it. so here goes and remember i dont care what you think of me because i know you all think i am an idiot, and you want me to retaliate back, but i wont, i will only say something to the people who say nice things.

40 mistakes men have while having sex with women

1) NOT KISSING FIRST.
Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her
feel like you're paying by the hour and trying to get your money's worth by
cutting out non essentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of
foreplay.

...................

It seems that I did nothing correct during the past over ten years, gee, I have to redo it.