4 Moms 4 Aidan

[gametime07]

Four very hot stories from an author named hetup. A young man helped raised by the moms of his friends, after his mother dies at an early age. Four stories so far on how he bedded each, and looking forward to more stories from this series.

 

[sr71plt]

Doubt anyone will look them up without links to them.

 

[EquinoxRising]

Why did the story have four Aidens?

 

[gametime07]

Sorry, here is a link to the first one.https://www.literotica.com/s/4-moms-4-aidan-ch-01

 

[ishtat]

My initial response is negative. The beginning is dull with narrative descriptions of the four women with quite unnecessary statistics, measurements, etc. followed by a similar description of the male protagonist. It is tedious and difficult not to back click after the first page.

I'll just make a couple of points. If the author starts out with a party, that is an easy vehicle for allowing the characteristics of the principal actors to be presented in dialogue rather than narrative. And they don't all have to be brought front and centre immediately

The specific physical description of the people, especially the statistics tends to make them caricatures rather than characters. If a writer make characters flawless physically, they are in fact less believable to the minds eye. Small faults can make a person no less attractive and definitely more distinct .

The opening lacks 'oomph' and as such fails to grab the readers attention.

That's all for now, I'll think a bit more before further comment.