35 years old, just now into guys... I NEED some HELP!!

[Baskin Robbins]

I've been straight all my life to my knowledge. I met my wife when I was 14. We dated for 6 years, broke up for 6 years (I was engaged to another girl during that time).

We got back together and have been married for almost 10 years and I must say...

I'm bored. She won't talk about sex. She's not adventurous a/b sex. And in general is not interested in sex. We "do it on weekends" to put the "demons at bay", but the fun stuff is non-existant.

I have been fantasizing a/b gay sex with one of my friends. I wake up at night and HAVE to CUM to go to sleep just thinking a/b him.

I would be happy to have my wife finger my prostate. She won't do it. Needless to say she won't "strap one on".

I'm not sure a/b him or her or what to do...

I need some help!!!!

 

[Megadeth]

 

[Etoile]

Does she know you're not happy with the amount/type of sex in your relationship? It's fine to be into guys and want to do something about it, but if you're doing it behind your wife's back then it's still cheating. If you do talk to her about it, see what she says and then decide how to act from there. If you're okay with cheating on your wife, well...I'm not going to go there. http://www.amanita.net/images/smilies/emo_sick.gif

 

[none2_none2]

I've been straight all my life to my knowledge. I met my wife when I was 14. We dated for 6 years, broke up for 6 years (I was engaged to another girl during that time).

We got back together and have been married for almost 10 years and I must say...

I'm bored. She won't talk about sex. She's not adventurous a/b sex. And in general is not interested in sex. We "do it on weekends" to put the "demons at bay", but the fun stuff is non-existant.

I have been fantasizing a/b gay sex with one of my friends. I wake up at night and HAVE to CUM to go to sleep just thinking a/b him.

I would be happy to have my wife finger my prostate. She won't do it. Needless to say she won't "strap one on".

I'm not sure a/b him or her or what to do...

I need some help!!!!

Perhaps you need to suggest counceling for yourself or both of you. For what it's worth there ARE actually guys who have a low sex drive too. I was seeing someone I thought was the one. His idea of sex was maybe once every few weeks. In all fairness as I've gotten older, my drive has gone down too, so perhaps in his case it was because he was older. Anyway, I think if you just act out on these fantasies without first working this through with perhaps counceling, you may open up a pandora's box that you'll regret one day.

 

[biblaze]

I don't know if counseling will help, and I don't believe in cheating...so your options seem to be limited. If you can't get her to open up about her inhibitions, then you will either stay unsatisfied or you will have to stray.
My first real bisexual experience (I don't count the time when I was 18, drunk and woke up to my best friend sucking my cock...I tried to return the favor but was too drunk)was 2 years ago when I was 32. My wife was there sucking the same cock I was. Let me tell you that was a long wait between cocks....
Make sure you are CLEAR with your desires for your wife....there are fantasies and there are things that you actually want to happen. Make sure she knows the difference and ask for her help. Maybe with her low sex drive, she will welcome someone else to serve your needs and, as it was with my wife, maybe it will excite her significantly enough to increase her overall sex drive.
By the way, in my marriage, it's my wife that is always horny.....I'm getting more adventurous and "dirty" as I get older, so I guess normal sex isn't as exciting....I'm more likely to be masturbating to some fetish porn on the internet than actually having sex. (may have to do with my extensive travelling for work)

 

[OlderBiMan]

Find a man. Get to know him. Get to know yourself. Test yourself and HIM for any STDs. Have some SAFE sex. Enjoy. Oh, and don't be obvious about it. Dont let anyone know. Delete your tracks on the Internet. Don't use the house phone. Comprende ?

 

[mansome]

Fantasizing is fine.......... but cheating on your wife and doing almost anything without her consent.. especially if you know she will disaprove of it is not a good thing at all... can't help the marriage..

Sorry this isn't working out for you.. but if you don't love your wife and things aren't going right you should talk no matter what the reason.......

 

[Baskin Robbins]

I love my wife. She's my best friend. I'm just UTTERLY frustrated sexually. I've never fantasized about sex with a guy until now. My fantasies have gone into overdrive!

 

[mansome]

I love my wife. She's my best friend. I'm just UTTERLY frustrated sexually. I've never fantasized about sex with a guy until now. My fantasies have gone into overdrive!

ok.. well let's just tweak your fantasy a little bit and say that you can't get the thought of fucking Janet Jackson out of your mind...

should you take steps to do this behind your wife's back and without her approval?


sorry but I just had to lend you my fantasy... *laughs*

 

[whitebuck]

the best of both worlds what more can each of you enjoy just be open and dont hide it she might surprise you

 

[lovablo]

I know what you are talking about 100%. My wife also has virtually no sex drive. I fantasize all the time about sex with another man, but that is something that I have never done, although I woud very much like too! I also like to wear stockings and feminine things when I am at home alone. My wife use to like to get somewhat kinky every now and then, but for the last few years it seems like sex is not even a somewhat priority.