tolyk
Checked out
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2004
- Posts
- 45,663
That make life so much more comfortable. (found these funny, so I'm sharing)
An ad in Maclean's magazine, brought to you by TD Bank (canadian) any with a (C) beside it are Canadian inventions, the rest are misc.
100 - Call dislay: helps you avoid bill collectors, stalkers, and difficult in-laws.
99 - Liquid bandages: if you've ever cut a knuckle, you'll get this one.
98 - Speed dial: how welse would you be able to remember all those numbers?
97 - Beer fridges: while you're up, can you get me one, too? (C)
96 - Remote control: for you TV, stereo, garage door, etc. Hey, it beats having to get up.
95 - Deodorant: this one's not so much for your comfort as for other people's.
94 - Breath Mints (see above).
93 - Ginger ale: a great accompaniment to another outstanding Canadian innovation--rye. (C)
92 - Drive-throughs: banks, resteraunts, pharmacies.
91 - Mitts on a string: these would come in handy for a lot of adults, too.
90 - Indoor plumbing: speaks for itself.
89 - The Red Eye: no, not the flight, although this mix of lager and tomato juice would probably help it pass more enjoyably. (C)
88 - Elasticized waistbands: because not everyone is a supermodel.
87 - Silicon nose pads on eyeglasses: so they won't rub you the wrong way.
86 - The snowblower: uh, could you do my driveway, too? (C)
85 - Recliner chairs: let you snooze in an upright position.
84 - Sprinklers: Just don't water the sidewalk.
83 - Two- (or more-) ply toilet paper: sure beats the heck out of old newspapers.
82 - Ice Wine: complex, sweet, intoxicating. Sound like love? (C)
81 - Athletic supporters: no, we don't mean sports fans.
80 - Pillows: because before they were invented, people slept with their heads on logs.
79 - Cruise control: so much for putting the pedal to the metal.
78 - Adjustable anything.
77 - Toe rubbers: they're coming back into style. Really. (C) (What the hell are these?)
76 - Home delivery (of the newspaper, dinner, whatever).
75 - Water heaters: sure beats a pot and a fire.
74 - TV on demand: a couch potato's dream come true.
73 - Bathtubs that let you recline: with bubbles, sheer blis.
72 - Rechargeable batteries: for cameras, toys,
and now, for cars.
71 - Train sleeping cars: when you wake up, you're there. (C)
70 - Online banking: manage your money from anywhere you have internet access, any time you want.
69 - Flannelette sheets: so cosy on those long winter nights.
68 - Humane mousetraps: because Minnie and Mickey are people, too.
67 - Traffic reports: because Canada has two seasons, winter and construction.
66 - Yukon Gold mashed potatoes: the ultimate comfort food. (C)
65 - Padded bras: a good way to make more of less.
64 - Microwave ovens: why wait five hours when it can be ready in five minutes?
63 - Springs: on beds, couches, car seats. For the derrière that has everything.
62 - The multiplex movie theatre: so many movies, so little time (C)
61 - Everythign Must Go! sales: nothing in life is free, but big sales come close.
60 - Sandals: not just for hippies anymore.
59 - Instant potato flakes: created at the National Research Council in Ottawa. Just proves that no one's perfect. (C)
58 - Keyless entry: now if only you could remember where you put your glasses.
57 - Bubble wrap: protects your valuables, plus you get to pop it. It doesn't get much better.
56 - Stretch cotton clothing: if you've ever worn crimpoline, you'll get it.
55 - The Nanaimo Bar: the quintessential sweet table confection. (C)
54 - Cell phones: unless you forget to turn it off when you're at the movies.
53 - Lifetime warranties: because without one, it will break the day after the warranty expires.
52 - Interac payments: when was the last time you paid for something with a cheque?
51 - Toques: the all-Canadian ear warmer. (C)
50 - Ski lifts: because getting up the mountain is a lot harder than down it.
49 - Room service: keep lots of toonies handy for tips.
48 - Fireplaces: all the warmth and cheer of a campfire and none of the bugs.
47 - Valet parking: every four-cylinder should get the chance to impersonate a Rolls-Royce at least once.
46 - The paint roller: as long as you don't paint yourself into a corner. (C)
45 - Electric blankets (also, duvets and featherbeds).
44 - Self-cleaning ovens: we're still waiting for self-cleaning bathrooms.
43 - Dental freezing: now if only they could do something about that sound.
42 - Ginger beef: surprise! This Calgary-born concotion is 100% Chinese-Canadian. (C)
41 - Slippers: pure in-house comfort.
40 - Reality TV: it's comforting to know there are people even crazier than you out there.
39 - Shooters: the one-ounce dose of cheer is credited to Canuck bartenders with a penchant for experimenting. (C)
38 - Nail Clippers: how did people manage before these things were invented?
37 - T-shirts: hard to believe they were once considered underwear.
36 - The banana split--yum! (C)
35 - Long underwear: plus, you get to make a fashion statement.
34 - Stoop and scoop laws: for those who don't have dogs.
33 - Outlet malls: need we say more?
32 - The 2-4: a.k.a. a suitcase of beer (C)
31 - Seat warmers: every seat should come with one.
30 - Hot water bottles: at least, until they cool off.
29 - Poutine: okay, it's an acquired taste.
28 - The Internet: helps to kill so much of that boring down time at work.
27 - Smart cars: gas just hit US$50 a barrel. What more do you need to know?
26 - Beaver Tails: the edible variety, that is. (C)
25 - Night lights: the fewer toes you stub, the better.
24 - Eyeglasses: all the better to see everything with.
23 - The chocolate fountain: the latest dessert craze. Designed for serious choc-o-holics. (C)
22 - Massages: rub you the right way.
21 - Hot tubs: a.k.a slow cookers for people.
20 - Yoga: ever see an unhappy rubber band?
19 - Lubricants: for people and machines.
18 - Orthopedic backrests: ahhh, no more aching backs. (C)
17 - Lint removers: de rigeur for men - and women - in black.
16 - Breakfast in bed: two of the best things in life wrapped up in one.
15 - First-class travel: because it feels so good not to have your knees up around your ears.
14 - Green ink: a lot friendlier than the red stuff! (C)
13 - Golf ball finders: keep the folks playing behind you a lot happier, too.
12 - Extended banking hours.
11 - Microwave popcorn: as long as it doesn't explode.
10 - Tourtiere: and for dessert, tarte au sucre. Carbs be damned! (C)
9 - Ear plugs: ideal for pet owners, new parents and folks with noisy neighbours.
8 - The egg carton: try carrying a dozen eggs at a time without breaking one. (C)
7 - Velcro runners: sure beats teaching your kids to tie their own shoelaces.
6 - Seat sales: discounts on seats are the all-Canadian way to fly. (C)
5 - Green garbage bags: they work pretty well as low-rent garment bags, too.
4 - DVDs and VCRs: a baby-sitter's best friends.
3 - The electric car heater: means you'll get to work on time, even when it's 40 below.
2 - Hair conditioner: so you won't look like Don King at your next job interview.
1 - Zippers: try to imagine clothes without them (C)
An ad in Maclean's magazine, brought to you by TD Bank (canadian) any with a (C) beside it are Canadian inventions, the rest are misc.
100 - Call dislay: helps you avoid bill collectors, stalkers, and difficult in-laws.
99 - Liquid bandages: if you've ever cut a knuckle, you'll get this one.
98 - Speed dial: how welse would you be able to remember all those numbers?
97 - Beer fridges: while you're up, can you get me one, too? (C)
96 - Remote control: for you TV, stereo, garage door, etc. Hey, it beats having to get up.
95 - Deodorant: this one's not so much for your comfort as for other people's.
94 - Breath Mints (see above).
93 - Ginger ale: a great accompaniment to another outstanding Canadian innovation--rye. (C)
92 - Drive-throughs: banks, resteraunts, pharmacies.
91 - Mitts on a string: these would come in handy for a lot of adults, too.
90 - Indoor plumbing: speaks for itself.
89 - The Red Eye: no, not the flight, although this mix of lager and tomato juice would probably help it pass more enjoyably. (C)
88 - Elasticized waistbands: because not everyone is a supermodel.
87 - Silicon nose pads on eyeglasses: so they won't rub you the wrong way.
86 - The snowblower: uh, could you do my driveway, too? (C)
85 - Recliner chairs: let you snooze in an upright position.
84 - Sprinklers: Just don't water the sidewalk.
83 - Two- (or more-) ply toilet paper: sure beats the heck out of old newspapers.
82 - Ice Wine: complex, sweet, intoxicating. Sound like love? (C)
81 - Athletic supporters: no, we don't mean sports fans.
80 - Pillows: because before they were invented, people slept with their heads on logs.
79 - Cruise control: so much for putting the pedal to the metal.
78 - Adjustable anything.
77 - Toe rubbers: they're coming back into style. Really. (C) (What the hell are these?)
76 - Home delivery (of the newspaper, dinner, whatever).
75 - Water heaters: sure beats a pot and a fire.
74 - TV on demand: a couch potato's dream come true.
73 - Bathtubs that let you recline: with bubbles, sheer blis.
72 - Rechargeable batteries: for cameras, toys,
and now, for cars.71 - Train sleeping cars: when you wake up, you're there. (C)
70 - Online banking: manage your money from anywhere you have internet access, any time you want.
69 - Flannelette sheets: so cosy on those long winter nights.
68 - Humane mousetraps: because Minnie and Mickey are people, too.
67 - Traffic reports: because Canada has two seasons, winter and construction.
66 - Yukon Gold mashed potatoes: the ultimate comfort food. (C)
65 - Padded bras: a good way to make more of less.
64 - Microwave ovens: why wait five hours when it can be ready in five minutes?
63 - Springs: on beds, couches, car seats. For the derrière that has everything.
62 - The multiplex movie theatre: so many movies, so little time (C)
61 - Everythign Must Go! sales: nothing in life is free, but big sales come close.
60 - Sandals: not just for hippies anymore.
59 - Instant potato flakes: created at the National Research Council in Ottawa. Just proves that no one's perfect. (C)
58 - Keyless entry: now if only you could remember where you put your glasses.
57 - Bubble wrap: protects your valuables, plus you get to pop it. It doesn't get much better.
56 - Stretch cotton clothing: if you've ever worn crimpoline, you'll get it.
55 - The Nanaimo Bar: the quintessential sweet table confection. (C)
54 - Cell phones: unless you forget to turn it off when you're at the movies.
53 - Lifetime warranties: because without one, it will break the day after the warranty expires.
52 - Interac payments: when was the last time you paid for something with a cheque?
51 - Toques: the all-Canadian ear warmer. (C)
50 - Ski lifts: because getting up the mountain is a lot harder than down it.
49 - Room service: keep lots of toonies handy for tips.
48 - Fireplaces: all the warmth and cheer of a campfire and none of the bugs.
47 - Valet parking: every four-cylinder should get the chance to impersonate a Rolls-Royce at least once.
46 - The paint roller: as long as you don't paint yourself into a corner. (C)
45 - Electric blankets (also, duvets and featherbeds).
44 - Self-cleaning ovens: we're still waiting for self-cleaning bathrooms.
43 - Dental freezing: now if only they could do something about that sound.
42 - Ginger beef: surprise! This Calgary-born concotion is 100% Chinese-Canadian. (C)
41 - Slippers: pure in-house comfort.
40 - Reality TV: it's comforting to know there are people even crazier than you out there.
39 - Shooters: the one-ounce dose of cheer is credited to Canuck bartenders with a penchant for experimenting. (C)
38 - Nail Clippers: how did people manage before these things were invented?
37 - T-shirts: hard to believe they were once considered underwear.
36 - The banana split--yum! (C)
35 - Long underwear: plus, you get to make a fashion statement.
34 - Stoop and scoop laws: for those who don't have dogs.
33 - Outlet malls: need we say more?
32 - The 2-4: a.k.a. a suitcase of beer (C)
31 - Seat warmers: every seat should come with one.
30 - Hot water bottles: at least, until they cool off.
29 - Poutine: okay, it's an acquired taste.
28 - The Internet: helps to kill so much of that boring down time at work.
27 - Smart cars: gas just hit US$50 a barrel. What more do you need to know?
26 - Beaver Tails: the edible variety, that is. (C)
25 - Night lights: the fewer toes you stub, the better.
24 - Eyeglasses: all the better to see everything with.
23 - The chocolate fountain: the latest dessert craze. Designed for serious choc-o-holics. (C)
22 - Massages: rub you the right way.
21 - Hot tubs: a.k.a slow cookers for people.
20 - Yoga: ever see an unhappy rubber band?
19 - Lubricants: for people and machines.
18 - Orthopedic backrests: ahhh, no more aching backs. (C)
17 - Lint removers: de rigeur for men - and women - in black.
16 - Breakfast in bed: two of the best things in life wrapped up in one.
15 - First-class travel: because it feels so good not to have your knees up around your ears.
14 - Green ink: a lot friendlier than the red stuff! (C)
13 - Golf ball finders: keep the folks playing behind you a lot happier, too.
12 - Extended banking hours.
11 - Microwave popcorn: as long as it doesn't explode.
10 - Tourtiere: and for dessert, tarte au sucre. Carbs be damned! (C)
9 - Ear plugs: ideal for pet owners, new parents and folks with noisy neighbours.
8 - The egg carton: try carrying a dozen eggs at a time without breaking one. (C)
7 - Velcro runners: sure beats teaching your kids to tie their own shoelaces.
6 - Seat sales: discounts on seats are the all-Canadian way to fly. (C)
5 - Green garbage bags: they work pretty well as low-rent garment bags, too.
4 - DVDs and VCRs: a baby-sitter's best friends.
3 - The electric car heater: means you'll get to work on time, even when it's 40 below.
2 - Hair conditioner: so you won't look like Don King at your next job interview.
1 - Zippers: try to imagine clothes without them (C)
I had to slow myself down and let myself be caught, but thats alright, because playing games with the kids was great.
