What makes a bad porn movie???

Kiwi wolf bought me round a couple of DVDs last night, but the chicks are just to plastic looking and they guys and just too manicured for my liking....

P.S. Don't look at the making of the movie till you have got your jollies from it.

What makes a bad porn movie?

LOL Most of the dialogue? lmao

kjtatts said:

What makes a bad porn movie?

LOL Most of the dialogue? lmao

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The kids were still awake in their bedrooms so I had the volume turned down... not that I missed anything important I would say.

LOL T.H. You can 'lip read' right?

kjtatts said:

LOL T.H. You can 'lip read' right?

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I though they looked too juicy to say anything too intelligent.

Bad Porn usually has these things in it:

-Plastic breasts that don't wobble
-Bad script (the inevitable bad acting is sometimes bearable with a better script and no script is often better than a bad script)
-The lack of genuine female pleasure
-Men with funny hair (often ponytails or mullets)
-The lack of someone who really knows how to lick pussy
-Horrible Enya style music and fake overdubbed squeels that drown out any real sounds of pleasure

I watched 'Conquest' with Jenna Jameson and the "making of..." documentary was much much hotter than the film itself (which I fast forwarded through). They should just release a compilation of all the unedited "making of" footage from these films.

Good Porn:
-I quite like John Leslie's 'gonzo-style 'Voyeur' series (especially part 18, casting couch 2 which has cute Eastern European girls with a bit of genuine character about them))
-'The Opening Of Misty Beethoven' by Henry Paris is a really funny, well-written old porno film starring some really foxy 1970s babes and Jamie Gillis doing his best Cary Grant impersonation. It's basically a porno "My Fair Lady" with fucking instead of singing.

*takes notes before phoning KW with an order*

Any porn that has a story line is bad.

I like my sex without a pretense of a story.

kjtatts said:

*takes notes before phoning KW with an order*

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LOL. Maybe I should get a commission on this.

Here, I've started a Good Porn Recommendations thread.

I agree LoveToRead that most porn with a storyline is bad but that's usually cause the script, plot, dialogue and acting are terrible, but 'Misty Beethoven' is pretty good on most of those counts and a lot of the sex scenes are really hot too.

kjtatts said:

What makes a bad porn movie?

LOL Most of the dialogue? lmao

Click to expand...

Is there dialogue in porn?