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Finding Your Sexuality Poll

How did you come to decide on your sexuality?

  • Gay, no question, not ever. I've never had hetero relations and never want to. I'm not even curious.

    Votes: 3 4.3%

  • Gay, but I wasn't sure/denied it/was curious and had to give heterosexuality a try.

    Votes: 5 7.2%

  • Bi. I've always looked at life from both sides.

    Votes: 17 24.6%

  • Hetero, but I have felt attracted to certain individuals of my own gender and have experimented/want

    Votes: 17 24.6%

  • Hetero, no question. Straight as an arrow. No desire to experiment, not ever.

    Votes: 21 30.4%

  • Other. Do you really want to know?

    Votes: 6 8.7%
  • Total voters
    69
3113

3113

Hello Summer!
Joined
Nov 1, 2005
Posts
13,823
I'm sure something like this has been posted before, but I'm curious as to how many people decided on their sexuality with/without experimentation. I'm wondering how many people are sure of their sexuality from the get-go, vs. how many are uncertain (or in denial) and feel the need to experiment and test themselves first.
 
3113 said:
I'm sure something like this has been posted before, but I'm curious as to how many people decided on their sexuality with/without experimentation. I'm wondering how many people are sure of their sexuality from the get-go, vs. how many are uncertain (or in denial) and feel the need to experiment and test themselves first.
Click to expand...
I have always had the hots for the female of the speices since I can remember noticing them to be different. I have never been attracted to males. Women all the way for me, since early youth.
 
I didn't realize that I am bi until I started having sexual fantasies about my next door neighbor. Damn, he had a nice, Mediterranean look to him! :D To me, sexuality is defined by desire or lust. It's not who you fuck, but who you WANT to fuck. :cool:
 
Denial, baby. I was well versed in denial. I think the fact that I used to muse aloud in high school about whether I really was bisexual (the classification I had claimed at that point) or if I was really gay and just thought I was attracted to men because I thought I was supposed to be. Wondering that at all really should have been a clue, but denial is a bitch sometimes. ;)

Experimentation didn't really come into it, though. In high school I kissed a couple of girls (and fell in love with one in particular), but never anything more than that. Marraige is what caused my certainty, methinks.
 
I've never been confused... I think my being bi comes more from my openness and ability to see beauty in everything... men and women... so it's easy to be attracted to both, for me... and it's much more an individual thing.. some women, nada... some women... ROWR! :catroar: And the same goes for men... I don't love a gender, I love people... so it manifests that way in my sexuality as well...
 
SelenaKittyn said:
I've never been confused... I think my being bi comes more from my openness and ability to see beauty in everything... men and women... so it's easy to be attracted to both, for me... and it's much more an individual thing.. some women, nada... some women... ROWR! :catroar: And the same goes for men... I don't love a gender, I love people... so it manifests that way in my sexuality as well...
Click to expand...

Agree 100%
 
The current trend toward bisexuality, sexual experimentation and personal lifestyle choices is very much an expression of the development of consumerist capitalism and it's demands for well-adapted infantile narcissistic individuals. The narcissistic obsession with self and pleasure creates constant needs and desires; while the infantile element ensures that the need to satiate those needs and desires takes pride of place in the individual's personal agenda. And thus you have people who are just and only what they buy.

There - that should be utterly clear as mud. :nana:
 
Either mud is pretty clear this morning, or those meds are wonder drugs. :D
And, for the record, i don't believe it.

It's a very individual thing. Some people rage against their urges, some go along with them, and some just... well, they're just odd.

Me? It just happened. i know which gender i prefer, as a general rule, but i have nothing against playing touchy-feely with either. It depends on the time, day, place, mood, who's there, and a million other little things. For the record? i'm an odd one.
 
I am now certian that I am straight as an arrow, but I wasn't too sure for a while. When I was a teenager, I wondered why I didn't seem to be interested in anyone. After a while I finally figured out it was because, up to that point, I'd never met anyone I was attacted to, lol.

I'd also wondered why lesbian porn was more interesting to me than straight, but I realised it was because women got all the sexual attention in lesbian porn. I just can't get off on watching a girl give a guy head for a half hour. In most straight porns, we're lucky if the guy will even stick a finger in the girl. It all just seems to be endless head then maybe five minutes of actual intercourse.
 
Actually, it's only infantile if you expect something to be handed to you for nothing, such as pleasure. To actively seek it, to liberate yourself, to pursue, to enlighten yourself, is, frankly, to earn it.
 
Pretty much straight, but with an occasional glance at a really pretty man. I wouldn't mind an experiment, but I think I'd be very, very, very shallow in my choice of guy and Lord knows I couldn't do more than a short fling.

Men are too dumb to actually go out with.

So, basically 90% straight, with the other 10% reserved for people like Sean Maher.

The Earl
 
From as far back as I can remember I've been into women. From sneaking my dad's Playboy magazines at four years old to inciting every little girl in the nieghborhood to skinny dip, I knew what I wanted. Never interested in men at all. I think because I was so sure at such a young age it is what made me certain that homosexuality wasn't learned behavior like the church taught. I don't ever remember making a conscious choice, so I couldn't imagine anyone else really did either.
 
I knew in my early teens that I was 'different', but didn't know what to do about it. Dated one guy and married him, partly because it was the thing to do, and partly because I actually enjoyed being with him. We had a mainly happy 32 year run, produced two wonderful sons, but in the end, parted amicably.

In my heart, I always knew it was women who did it for me, and once I could no longer hide from that fact, it was just a matter of time before I had to do something about.

That something was firstly admitting it to my two closest friends, then writing and posting on here. And look what that brought me? The love of my life. The one I'd been searching and hoping for. :heart:
 
SEVERUSMAX said:
Actually, it's only infantile if you expect something to be handed to you for nothing, such as pleasure. To actively seek it, to liberate yourself, to pursue, to enlighten yourself, is, frankly, to earn it.
Click to expand...

No, it's infantile if you can't delay gratification.

Although the end result might be similar.

:D
 
matriarch said:
I knew in my early teens that I was 'different', but didn't know what to do about it. Dated one guy and married him, partly because it was the thing to do, and partly because I actually enjoyed being with him. We had a mainly happy 32 year run, produced two wonderful sons, but in the end, parted amicably.

In my heart, I always knew it was women who did it for me, and once I could no longer hide from that fact, it was just a matter of time before I had to do something about.

That something was firstly admitting it to my two closest friends, then writing and posting on here. And look what that brought me? The love of my life. The one I'd been searching and hoping for. :heart:
Click to expand...



*sniff*
that made me cry
I love a happy ending :cathappy:
 
Straight.

I can acknowledge the fact that another girl is pretty, and I can wonder what it would be like, but if I try to sit down and think about doing anything with a girl, I get the same feeling as I do when I'm cleaning my toilet. (Only worse. The toilet I CAN clean, but touching another woman...no.)

Not even Angelina Jolie, whom everyone claims would be their "bi-trigger" does anything for me.

So thanks, but no thanks. I'll stick to the fellas.
 
I've never had any doubt I'm straight. I've always liked women. I like the way they look, I love the sound of their voices, I like the way they think and feel. Both ways.

Generally I don't even like men as people. Testosterone addled jackasses most of 'em. As objects of sexual desire, well, (hurl!)

I've been thinking a lot about bisexuality recently, and I'm increasingly of the opinion it's a lot less common than believed. Most 'bis' are gay, but the social pressure to be 'straight' is enormous. So many fudge their sexuality.
 
So many fudge their sexuality.
Click to expand...

I have often wondered if this goes both ways... if women will say that they're bi, just because they think it will turn a man on, that kind of thing?
 
I'm bi. I think I realized it when I was about four years old and equally crushing on Wonder Woman and Han Solo at the same time. I'm not "experimenting" or trying to be trendy. I'm also not really gay and in denial due to society's pressures. I'm, uh, greedy. I fucking want it all, 'kay? :p
 
SummerMorning said:
No, it's infantile if you can't delay gratification.

Although the end result might be similar.

:D
Click to expand...

There we have to disagree. I find it masochistic to delay gratification, but that's just me. To me, abstinence is a form of masochism sublimated into a "virtue". Then again, I may have simply read too much of the Satanic Bible. :devil: What LaVey says there makes sense to me, although I reject Satanism because it is still too dualistic for my taste.
 
OhMissScarlett said:
I'm bi. I think I realized it when I was about four years old and equally crushing on Wonder Woman and Han Solo at the same time. I'm not "experimenting" or trying to be trendy. I'm also not really gay and in denial due to society's pressures. I'm, uh, greedy. I fucking want it all, 'kay? :p
Click to expand...

My sentiments exactly. At the risk of having SummerMorning accuse me of "infantilism" again, to quote Queen, "I want it all and I want it now!" :D Of course, that's not practical, so I will settle for all of it little bits at a time. :D
 
No, it's infantile if you can't delay gratification.
Click to expand...

But how is being bi not "delaying gratification"?

to me it seems like it's just widening the scope of how you can receive gratification...

it doesn't seem to me that being bi means you have an inherent impulse-control-problem, per se...
 
SummerMorning said:
The current trend toward bisexuality, sexual experimentation and personal lifestyle choices is very much an expression of the development of consumerist capitalism and it's demands for well-adapted infantile narcissistic individuals. The narcissistic obsession with self and pleasure creates constant needs and desires; while the infantile element ensures that the need to satiate those needs and desires takes pride of place in the individual's personal agenda. And thus you have people who are just and only what they buy.

There - that should be utterly clear as mud. :nana:
Click to expand...
Nice mud.


I have no idea what I am and no desire to label it. From puberty to late teens I was convinced that I was gay. Then I fell in love with a girl.
 
I think he is just saying that you have to be able to not indulge so soon. Well, for me, that only makes sense in situations where indulgence is impractical. For instance, you don't try to seduce your comrades in the field, unless of course you have a lull in fighting and they have hinted that they are into guys....Just a case in point. Simply delaying for no reason at all strikes me as evidence of masochism.
 
SelenaKittyn said:
But how is being bi not "delaying gratification"?

to me it seems like it's just widening the scope of how you can receive gratification...

it doesn't seem to me that being bi means you have an inherent impulse-control-problem, per se...
Click to expand...

I think he is just saying that you have to be able to not indulge so soon. Well, for me, that only makes sense in situations where indulgence is impractical. For instance, you don't try to seduce your comrades in the field, unless of course you have a lull in fighting and they have hinted that they are into guys....Just a case in point. Simply delaying for no reason at all strikes me as evidence of masochism.
 
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