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Safewords. Does yours have a special meaning just for you?

nh23

nh23

Daddy's chunky monkey. :)
Joined
Apr 27, 2007
Posts
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I was curious about what others use as their safeword and if it has a special meaning to you and your PYL/pyl? For example my safeword has a significant meaning to my Master and i. It is not a common word often used such as red. Master doesn't wish me to devulge what it is.. so i will leave it at that. Just wondering if others attach a special meaning to theirs also?
 
my safeword is simply "safeword", so it cant be mistaken for something else if i ever have to use it. to date, i havnt.
 
myinnerslut said:
my safeword is simply "safeword", so it cant be mistaken for something else if i ever have to use it. to date, i havnt.
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That's a good idea. Thank You for answering! :rose: To date i haven't ever had to use mine either.
 
I was trying to think of what ours was for the short time we had one, but I can't...overloaded memory banks this week. These days there is no safe word.

Catalina :catroar:
 
i think there was a safeword thread a few months ago, but i cant remeber when.... and the search hates me....
 
catalina_francisco said:
I was trying to think of what ours was for the short time we had one, but I can't...overloaded memory banks this week. These days there is no safe word.

Catalina :catroar:
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i'm not quite ready for no safe word yet..but soon i hope.
 
myinnerslut said:
i think there was a safeword thread a few months ago, but i cant remeber when.... and the search hates me....
Click to expand...

LOL..the search hates me also. Half the time it just pulls up a blank page. :confused:
 
I like things simple - yellow, red... But then again, I've never been in a 24/7 relationship - perhaps it would change then.

In my early days, I used yellow a couple of times when I discovered with a friend hard limits as a bottom that I'd not really realized I had. I have a bad right foot due to an old injury that never properly healed - my friend had used a wheel on my feet before with no problem. But I immediately became scared when he started to use a cane, albeit lightly - it's not the pain, and I know he's experienced enough to know how to avoid injury. But I have a deep fear of someday being crippled as I get older... I wasn't ashamed to use the word.

When topping, I definitely don't view it as a failure if my bottom calls yellow (it has happened twice - again in my early days before I gained enough confidence in what I was doing to really get into that "top space" where you can really sense what one's partner is feeling). Rather, it made me very aware of my responsibility and I was grateful that he let me know of his limits...

:rose: Neon
 
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forgive me if this is off topic, but i didnt think starting an entire new thread was appropriate as the topic of my question is so similiar to the safeword thread. i have heard of some couples not using the safeword during punishment. the theory is that the pyl should not be able to get out of his/her punishment by calling out thier safeword. in your own relationships, are you able to use your safeword during punishment?
 
myinnerslut said:
forgive me if this is off topic, but i didnt think starting an entire new thread was appropriate as the topic of my question is so similiar to the safeword thread. i have heard of some couples not using the safeword during punishment. the theory is that the pyl should not be able to get out of his/her punishment by calling out thier safeword. in your own relationships, are you able to use your safeword during punishment?
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Yes i am permitted to use mine at any time. Although i've never used mine i would be much harder on myself if i used it during a punishment.
 
our safeword is not common, because I wanted something that would in no way come out accidently during a scene... and red could come out accidently...

ours is Metallica...
 
MasterPhoenix said:
our safeword is not common, because I wanted something that would in no way come out accidently during a scene... and red could come out accidently...

ours is Metallica...
Click to expand...

Ours is very uncommon also..but more for personal reasons. A word that's sort of an inside thing i guess. Metallica is great! That's surely not going to come up accidently!
 
We have a safeword that I picked and he agreed on. I'd say what it was, but I'd rather ask for permission before I did. I chose it because I thought the word was pretty and it's not something that would ever come up in a normal conversation. A poem maybe! LOL It's our "stop now" word. I'm working on deciding on one I like for the "please slow down / stop for a moment because I'm freaking out & I need you to make sure I'm ok" word. I'd like it to be related to the other. Doesn't need to be though. I just want it to be.
To answer your other question, I didn't want to use any common words either. Too dull! As for meaning, I find my stop word soothing in & of itself.
 
We used to have the common red and yellow safe-words. We stopped that however and it's pretty much left up to him to decide how things go. Now, if there was a true emergency I might yell out red or STOP IT!! Either way I trust him to get the message that something is wrong, lay down the implement, and find out what my problem is.
 
His_pita said:
We used to have the common red and yellow safe-words. We stopped that however and it's pretty much left up to him to decide how things go. Now, if there was a true emergency I might yell out red or STOP IT!! Either way I trust him to get the message that something is wrong, lay down the implement, and find out what my problem is.
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if i hollered out 'stop it' He would do it harder *smiles* He's already stated our word is Metallica and it defiantly won't be hollered out on accident in the middle of a scene. as far as special meaning i don't think it really has one other than we both like Metallica and it's something unique that i wouldn't say during a scene.
 
Our safeword does have a special meaning. Cream and I met on another forum for a TV show (therefore vanilla) - and our safe word is the name he used there. Isn't a word that will come out naturally so it works from that point of view. But it's special to me because it's what I knew him as and called him until we got talking off forum - the rest as they say is history !!
 
lil_slave_rose said:
if i hollered out 'stop it' He would do it harder *smiles* He's already stated our word is Metallica and it defiantly won't be hollered out on accident in the middle of a scene. as far as special meaning i don't think it really has one other than we both like Metallica and it's something unique that i wouldn't say during a scene.
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No offense intended, rose or MP, but fuck that shit. I have my own safewords, which I have never used, but I also expect any of my partners to know the difference between a half-hearted, "Ow, that hurts, stop," and "OW, THAT HURTS, STOP, GODDAMMIT!" There have been a couple of times in which I was so caught up in a scene and in my own headspace that I needed a way out, but couldn't get the safewords to come out of my mouth. If my "Oh, God, please stop" had been ignored...yeah, that person would never put his/her hands on me ever again. When I Top, I don't play hard until I learn my bottoms' reactions, and I expect the same of anyone who Tops me. Learning to read reactions and body language is a big part of a Top's responsibility to his/her bottom, IMO.

I'm not saying y'all don't do this, but I felt like I should point it out, lest some newbie think that the whole world can crumble down around the players in a scene, but still nothing but a safeword can stop it. ;)
 
My safeword is my middle name, Which not many people know. I have only had to use it once up to now, and that was because i got cramp. Lol.
I feel i can trust my Master to know himself when i have had enough, hes very good at reading my body language now. But its nice to know i have the safe word there as a safety net. :)
 
BiBunny said:
No offense intended, rose or MP, but fuck that shit. I have my own safewords, which I have never used, but I also expect any of my partners to know the difference between a half-hearted, "Ow, that hurts, stop," and "OW, THAT HURTS, STOP, GODDAMMIT!" There have been a couple of times in which I was so caught up in a scene and in my own headspace that I needed a way out, but couldn't get the safewords to come out of my mouth. If my "Oh, God, please stop" had been ignored...yeah, that person would never put his/her hands on me ever again. When I Top, I don't play hard until I learn my bottoms' reactions, and I expect the same of anyone who Tops me. Learning to read reactions and body language is a big part of a Top's responsibility to his/her bottom, IMO.

I'm not saying y'all don't do this, but I felt like I should point it out, lest some newbie think that the whole world can crumble down around the players in a scene, but still nothing but a safeword can stop it. ;)
Click to expand...

well in our scenes, the only thing that stops the scene IS the safeword, that's just how we work, obviously this is not the same for everyone. we've also been together for almost 4 years and honestly, He knows when i've had enough before i even know. He knows me well and knows each and every sound by heart. i'm not saying nothing has ever gone 'wrong' but very rarely and i've never had to use my safeword yet. and yes, even when i've hollared "OW THAT FCKIN HURTS!!!" or even when i've said 'stop it' He doesn't stop, as i said, it usually gets harder, i learned quickly that just brought out the Sadist in Him more. but as i said He knows me well enough to know from my voice what i'm feeling....
 
BiBunny said:
No offense intended, rose or MP, but fuck that shit. I have my own safewords, which I have never used, but I also expect any of my partners to know the difference between a half-hearted, "Ow, that hurts, stop," and "OW, THAT HURTS, STOP, GODDAMMIT!" There have been a couple of times in which I was so caught up in a scene and in my own headspace that I needed a way out, but couldn't get the safewords to come out of my mouth. If my "Oh, God, please stop" had been ignored...yeah, that person would never put his/her hands on me ever again. When I Top, I don't play hard until I learn my bottoms' reactions, and I expect the same of anyone who Tops me. Learning to read reactions and body language is a big part of a Top's responsibility to his/her bottom, IMO.

I'm not saying y'all don't do this, but I felt like I should point it out, lest some newbie think that the whole world can crumble down around the players in a scene, but still nothing but a safeword can stop it. ;)
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I went to a play party last month where 4 switches were playing with each other, 3 on 1 at a time. One of the players, when bottoming, was clearly at the point where he couldn't take it anymore. My friend walked up to him and whispered in his ear, reminding him that he had a safeword. He used it immediately - clearly he'd slipped into a space where he couldn't take anymore but couldn't verbalize that either. I'm not suggesting that a pyl doesn't have a responsibility for her/his own safety, but certainly the PYL is in a better position to recognize and control what is happening, so carries perhaps more responsibility. Since people can become preverbal when they sub/bottom, while deciding upon a physical gesture "safe sign" can help, checking in is always a good idea...

ADDITION: Speaking of which, do people also designate physical gestures as "safe signs"?

:rose: Neon
 
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We officially use yellow and red. But I have yet to either one. I doubt if I ever will for a number of reasons. I am comfortable with simply communicating using regular words.."Daddy, please can I just catch my breath" or something of that sort. At this time he hasn't yet combined bondage with physical punishment. (At least, not more than loose restraints) So if during a flogging/spanking etc if I really couldn't handle it I would just sit up or move out of the way. I have on one occasion at the beginning done this and it worked for us. I don't think I even thought about using my safeword because I was so immersed in the emotions and physical feelings at the time.
 
lil_slave_rose said:
we've also been together for almost 4 years and honestly, He knows when i've had enough before i even know. He knows me well and knows each and every sound by heart....but as i said He knows me well enough to know from my voice what i'm feeling....
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Exactly. ;)

I was kinda grumpy last night, so I probably came across the wrong way, but you basically proved my point there. He knows if you can't handle anymore, even if you don't SAY anything. I think what I'm trying to say is that if you're physically in a place where you can't say anything or remember your safeword or whatever (and, yes, that's possible), he's not going to just keep whaling away on you on principle just because you haven't said your safeword. :cattail:

Oh, Miss Neon, to answer your question, my official "safe sign" is to snap my fingers, but I've never had to use that one, either. I can make some spectacular noises behind a gag if necessary, so if I'm getting close to my tolerance of something, the other person will KNOW, LOL.
 
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I learned ASL (American Sign Language) when I was little. Problem is, I only remember useless things. LOL Other than the alphabet. We've decided the letter 'W' is the slow down word. (And not something my fingers might accidently do like 'S' or 'T'.) We haven't picked the stop one yet though. Just haven't decided which works the best yet.
 
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