last post he choked me tonight

If I read this thread correctly, what you have in not domestic abuse, it is kidnapping. If it is kidnapping, don't call the police, call the FBI.

I'm with R.Richard

I have no other background information, but am just responding to your post.

Go directly to the police to report spousal abuse and kidnapping.

Let the police observe and record all evidence of your bruises, especially those about your neck, and request that they call in the FBI, to immediately remove your daughter from the potential danger of his custody.

Then, contact a shelter, (even if you can afford private lodging) both for their emotional support, and so that you will not be alone if/when he returns.

Look at you men, gathering up a possy with ammo and knives and swords...! Pfft!

Leave it to the Swedish Coven, gentlemen. I'll send him a curse of lepracy - starting with what's left of his balls.

Take good care of yourself, please. Be careful, and like the others say; don't go there alone, hide yourself and your son and let the police catch his sorry ass and lock him up somewhere he'll learn what it's like to get slapped around and screwed.

Oh, and please keep us updated.

Stuff like that doesn't happen in these parts because of people similarly minded to myself...

I'd join the posse....the only option I need to consider is tire iron or baseball bat.

Good luck to you, Nymph....I'll put in a little prayer for you and your young 'uns.

Nymph, take care of yourself and your kids.

Oh, I'm so sorry. And so angry.

What is happening? Are you OK? Have you talked to the police?

Everyone has given such good advice I have none to add, but please keep us updated when you can.

By the eight names of the blackest hells please tell me this scum lives in my neighborhood. I will gladly kill him, slowly and with the greatest pain imaginable in his flea like mind. Nymphy, you don't and can;'t understand the rage I am feeling right now, pray that you never do encounter something like it.

Please, for your safety and our peace of mind, call the police. Get your daughter back and get this weasel dicked scum sucking piece of shit off the streets. No woman should ever have to go through this, and the thought of one of my friends, even though you be cyber, going through this is something I have a hard time dealing with. It makes me want to go back to the way I once was, where the pain of others was the balm I used to sooth myself.

Let us know what is going on, and if this scum is within one hundred miles of West Palm Beach please let me know. I will gladly introduce him to the term chumming.

Cat

I'm so sorry this happened. Please take care of yourself. You and your little one have my thoughts and prayers. I agree with what the other have said. Call the police. Let us know what's happening and if there is anything we can do to help.

Wishing you strength.
~Moonie

Nymph

im ok and still here

update:
the baby is home, and fine. She has been home since last night.
I talked to a domestic violence councelor and handled things like she advised.
This was a first physical episode in a almost 3 year relationship. She said if we wanted to work things out to first Document what happened which i did. then meet in a place i felt safe and talk calmly , but make my point without backing down. and let him know that this is unacceptable, and if it happens a second time there will be reprecussions. And we both agreed to counciling together, not just one of us.
he has never before last night apologized for something he has done or said that hurt me or was wrong, last night we went over things going back to the beginning of this realtionship , and he apologized for his part in them. He will not be honest sometimes, and when he gets caught in a lie will not give it up. He sticks to his story , and then wonders why i dont trust him. i think he understands now exactly why. A simple truth can mean the world to someone. And an apology can mean even more.
when he doesnt want to argue he says things that infuriate me, like "just shut up and drop it. He says he just means, I don't want to argue , lets just agree that we disagree, but i feel what I say is being controled and he is giving me an order to shut up, so we argue more, and I told him , there are better ways to say this.
And to me, i fuck up to, I won't let him walk away from an argument, because i feel like that is another way of making sure I can't speak, when he really needs time away to calm down.

So we talked all this out for about 4 hours last night , and he listened, and I listened, a rare occurence. And we both agreed not to let kids have a part in our arguments, and be used as pawns. And we both agreed there was no reason in the world to justify his putting his hands on me, no matter how mad he was.
I told him he says things and does things all the time I don't agree with , he infuriates me to , but i dont walk up and kick him in the nuts because he did. I don't have that right. and he doesnt either.

I know i will probably hear alot back , about giving it a second chance. but i promise you , I will be doing it safely. And if i am proven wrong , he will be sitting in the jail, but i have messed up many many times in my life , and i always appreciate a second chance. and most of the time, i didn't make the same mistake again.

Now to all of you who have rallied around me , worried, and in some cases called out the posse. I love you, not just the persona of you I see here on Lit, but each of the real yous who worried, paced, or wanted to stand up for me. Each of you here are so special , and it all brings tears to my eyes. I coun't ask for a better group of people to share in my life, and to prove to me that i'm not alone out here , and i matter.
hug and love
Nymphy

Woodnymph,

Be careful that your participation in Literotica isn't used as 'evidence' to prove that you are unfit to be trusted with the care of children.

Once lawyers get involved, anything can be twisted out of all recognition.

Og

Just please be careful.

Yes, people can change, but in 99% of the cases, if a man puts his hands on you in anger once, he'll do it again. I know this, I've lived it.

Happy to hear from you and to see you are taking a logical approach.

Don't worry what people say about taking him back. On average a woman goes back to her abuser 8 times. Abusers who actually do change are 2%.
Not trying to deter you from what you feel you are doing, just giving you some food for thought.
Keep in touch with your councelor and keep in mind "You are not to blame for what he does".

PM me if you need.

So glad to hear that things worked out well woodnymph.

I hope the event you recounted marks a turning point for the better to you both.

*HUGS* and you're welcome. Any time.

I won't rail at you for giving him a second chance...when that number of chances starts hitting 4 & 5 I will, but not at 2...

stick to your guns, especially about the kids...

I'm glad you and the baby are both allright. I don't agree with you giving him a second chance, because I think it might turn out to be dangerous, but that's your choice. I wish you the best of luck.

Wow... lady... please please be careful. This may be the first time he got physical, but it is in no way the first time he was abusive. You describe a pattern of verbal and emotional abuse. He escalated from verbal abuse to choking you in front of your children. Please be careful, this man is capable of killing you, and he might. Keep you and your children safe.

Wishing you only well,
Willow

I'm glad that you and your little ones are all right.

However ...

Don't just believe anything that he says. This may be a first time but it doesn't mean that it'll be the last, no matter what he says. He has realized exactly what he's done and that may have served to calmed him down but again, that doesn't necessarily mean anything.

If I were you, I'd start making sure that I have everything necessary to survive without him. If he decides to do this again, you need to have 'mad money' to be able to have a place to stay and take care of yourself. And I wouldn't go back to him no matter what he said. In 18 years of marriage, two children and numerous arguments, my hubby has NOT ONCE laid his hands on me. NOT ONCE. It's not acceptable. PERIOD.

Get the counseling that you need but don't be dependant on him or on the results. Things may not work out and you need to be protected.

PM me if you'd like.
Velvet

*hugs* i'm glad you're working on this, and i know you'll have thought it out. Be careful, be wise and if you even suspect things haven;t got any better, get out. I'm confident you'll do what's best for you and he children. I'm a fan of second chances but let him know it is his ONLY chance.

So happy that you and yours are okay. I'm glad that you took action and are going along with it. What follows will likely be an emotional challenge....keep strong.

I like the advice your councelor gave you making a document of what happened. I think it is very important even now. I suggest that you keep a journal, if you will, of things that may happen or are said. Anything that might later come in useful for you.

Do what feels right for you but at the same time be careful. If he becomes abusive again be prepared to call the police. That said, I wish you all the luck and hope things work out for you.

PM me if you need

Moonie.

Nymphy,

I'm greatly relieved that you and thye kids are okay, but I do have a nagging thought that this guy won't change and is only saying what you/the counselor want to hear. Most abusers are ripe with apologies until the next time they get pissed off and the cycle begins anew.

I hope I'm wrong.

Just be very careful that you're never isolated with him and couldn't call for help if you need it.

Oh God Jesus, thank fuck you're okay.

I've just come back to find this thread and have never prayed as hard in my life as I did before reading your update.

Just... thank fuck. You take care hon and remember just how many people care so much for you.

The Earl

woodnymph_O said:

update:
the baby is home, and fine. She has been home since last night.

Click to expand...

This warms me heartie ho hear.

As for the rest... I'm as non-experienced in the field as you can get. Haven't been on the giving, revieving or even the witnessing end of domestic violence. So whatever you decide, it will be better informed than anything I could add. I can just send you my sincerest thoughts. To you, the kids...even him, that he gets his act together and becomes a better man, regardless of what you decide.