Advice needed

[Sallyhansen6914]

My ex put nair in my shampoo. How do I prove this?

It caused my scalp to get pimples and burn after one wash, I’ve heard the prank and I put it on my arm for them minutes and it definitely has nair in it. Has too but how do I prove it

 

[littlecordelera]

I am no attorney, but if it caused you harm, I think that would constitute assault. You may want to start by calling the police. Otherwise, you might want to contact an attorney and find out what legal recourse you may have. Keep the shampoo in a safe place and out of reach of others until you have concluded your efforts.

Good luck. I am sorry this has happened to you.

 

[twister947]

How do I prove this?

Proving the presence of Nair is easy. Proving how it got there will be uphill work. Unless there is serious damage, move on.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I would recommend reporting it and ask to have the bottle analyzed for fingerprints etc, and also have a log ready of his visits, contact etc and why you’re concerned it was him, and not a manufacturer issue - keep the bottle dry and untouched/ separate until you’re able to have it analyzed
And ignore the bs advice of ‘move on’ unless that’s what you prefer; you should never have had this happen and if he’s done that, it needs to be dealt with
Stay safe, stay strong

 

[twister947]

And ignore the bs advice of ‘move on

Try as I might, I just can't imagine walking into the local PD and reporting my girlfriend for putting Nair in my shampoo.

 

[Britva415]

Try as I might, I just can't imagine walking into the local PD and reporting my girlfriend for putting Nair in my shampoo.

Maybe going to a tort lawyer instead

Or both.

The former will probably need the report filed with the latter.

 

[Nightscream89]

My ex put nair in my shampoo. How do I prove this?

It caused my scalp to get pimples and burn after one wash, I’ve heard the prank and I put it on my arm for them minutes and it definitely has nair in it. Has too but how do I prove it

Well first off I am not a lawyer or anything related to law. So I'm no expert of any kind on this topic.

What I can think of is 2 ways of getting evidence.
First is proving that he aquired the nair. Did he purchase it somewhere? That combined with opportunity will at least make him answer some questions as to why he needed the nair.

The second is, have him admit to it or mess up by revealing something he shouldn't know.
For example if you mention feeling your scalp burn over text and he replies about the pimples. How would he know that when you haven't mentioned it? Or you asking if he put "Something" in your shampoo and he says he didn't put nair in it.
These are kinda movie esque "Gotcha" examples. But if you document it well over text it would help you prove your point.

Of course if is stupid enough to straight up admit to it over text or you manage to record him in a public place admitting to it, well then it's a slam dunk.

However if you after evidence, make sure to keep yourself safe. It's already established that this guy is willing to commit assault. Because that is what he did with that nair prank.

I would go to the police first and make a report. They probably can't do anything without proof. But at least it will be documented, that could help you later down the line.

 

[Cardinal]

How did your ex have access to your shampoo?

 

[twister947]

How did your ex have access to your shampoo?

In another thread she makes passing mention of saving the marriage. Which begs the question: When is an ex not an ex?

 

[Sallyhansen6914]

Well, I’m currently still living here for a short moment due to lack of family.

No, I am not saving, wanting to save, or be a part of anything with him. He is just a baby daddy at this point. And I fully make sure he is aware that I don’t want anything from him and I am working towards leaving.

It’s just better than going to the abuse center at this point.. but sometimes I think maybe I’m wrong in that sense.

I’m sure I posted something about saving the marriage because I did for years fully put everything in to the marriage and like an idiot I’ve been left with nothing.

He’s got a criminal justice degree, he is a very smart cookie. He’s an idiot in some ways but ultimately a jackass that has self esteem issues.

I still have the shampoo.

Yes I am on my meds and I’m 100% certain it has nair in it. I can tell you he just thinks I won’t act on it like I haven’t anything else of the bullshit in the last ten years.


I do know I could today go down to the police department and file charges on him and he’s been in jail in less that a week and that’s really giving.

But I’m attempting to keep some kind of common ground for my son, and that hasn’t been easy and everyday I’m starting to realize maybe I need to get him the fuck away from my son in fear my son will turn out like him.

It’s a big mess and ultimately staying here has only helped me see how shitty he is and how much he fucked with me mentally and physically and financially. He intends for me to be in a spot where I don’t have the option to go. But I don’t think he really knows who I am if he believes I’m gonna roll over and let it keep going.

 

[Sallyhansen6914]

You need a LAWYER!!!!!

I don't have any advice on how to get out of the predicament you created for yourself, (you didn't have to have a baby with him, and there is such a thing as birth control you know); however, I do know that in divorce court, half of everything he has belongs to you. Even if he is only your baby-daddy, and not legally married to you, (if you and he share a child, and you have lived together for a length of time), most courts look at the case the same as if you are legally married. If you do decide to get a divorce, keep in mind, in court, the welfare of the child is number one, and the rights of you and your ex come in a distant second! (I don't know what they call it today, but in the past, they used to call it common law marriage, and in most states, it is recognized as a legal marriage.)

I don't know what city or state you live in, but if your ex has any money, or something that can be converted in to cash, (like a house/property/car/etc), some lawyers will take their fee out of the settlement. With that said, if you do file for divorce, this is family court, not criminal court, and in family court, judges have a lot of leeway where the law and children are concerned, and can be surprisingly unforgiving. If you are fortunate enough to find a competent lawyer, (who knows what he/she is doing), listen to his/her advice, and don't do something stupid like trying to get revenge on your ex. Family court judges really, really don't like that! In family court, (above everything else), you have to appear to be the loving parent who wants nothing more than to take care of your child in a safe, loving home. Family court judges like that.

You wrote: "It’s just better than going to the abuse center at this point."

I am not without compassion for your predicament, and I do understand that you feel trapped because you don't have the resources to get out. And I do understand that you don't want to move into an abuse center; however, you should at least talk to them, and perhaps get some advice as to how to move forward with your life. Staying in an abusive home isn't doing your son any good!!!! Children learn and develop their personality from the environment they grow up in!

Because he hadn’t stalked or hit me in a month they denied shelter… I believe since yet again when I left this week I possibly might now qualify I’m gonna try to day

 

[Deadfreak]

Because he hadn’t stalked or hit me in a month they denied shelter… I believe since yet again when I left this week I possibly might now qualify I’m gonna try to day

Care