Isn't it incredible when a polite, friendly guy is surprisingly dominant in bed?

[GOODLUCKEVA]

I slept with one of my best friends this weekend for the 2nd time. The first time we did was a month ago after we’d been out drinking, and it was very... tender? And like we were learning each other’s bodies. He is an awesome person, one of the most kind and caring friends I have. He has such a genuine personality and the most warm smile... it felt really good being with him that night, and it hasn’t messed up our friendship at all.We live in different cities, and haven’t had a chance to hang out since then. When we saw each other this weekend, I was really hoping it would happen again but I wasn’t sure if he was feeling it.We went out with a group of friends, and when we were at the bar he started by gently brushing my arm and whispering in my ear - talking about what he would do to me when we get home, how he was going to make me dripping wet, how my body was driving him wild... it was so hot hearing him breathe these sentences in my ear and still having to act normal in front of everyone.It escalated for a few hours, and by the time we started kissing I felt like I was going to explode! His hands were so warm, he knew exactly where to touch me. Just as we were about to start having sex, he grabbed my face and said “I’m going to be a bit rough, is that okay?” FUCK. I melted.This second time was so different from the first. He completely took control and held me down on the bed, sometimes he’d choke me or cover my mouth. It was so fucking hot seeing this cute, polite boy transform into a dominant, powerful machine haha. Fuck I keep thinking about it.Anyway point being, I fucking love when a guy surprises me in bed like that!

 

[magic_rat]

Why is it a surprise? Are dom guys supposed to be rude and aggressive all the time?

I'm polite, well mannered and very friendly. I'm also very dom. But the dom side is for the bedroom only, if I acted that way all the time people would think I was an idiot.

And stuff like choking should have been discussed first. Stuff like that can go badly wrong if it's unexpected.

 

[Islander55]

A guy is not going to get into my bed unless he is polite and friendly. He does not need to dominate but I do like a man that knows what he likes and is willing to take it when it is offered. In other words, fuck me like you really need and want me.

 

[magic_rat]

A guy is not going to get into my bed unless he is polite and friendly. He does not need to dominate but I do like a man that knows what he likes and is willing to take it when it is offered. In other words, fuck me like you really need and want me.

I think you just described me perfectly.

 

[Exhibit0013]

Always a gentleman and polite. Then the bedroom is a playground

 

[Islander55]

I think you just described me perfectly.

And of course he needs to be OK with me not being a one man woman.

 

[GOODLUCKEVA]

Gentleman in the streets, freak in the sheets is my favorite type of person to have sex with. It's like you get to see the side of the person which the world doesn't get to see and that makes it so special

 

[Britva415]

Why is it a surprise? Are dom guys supposed to be rude and aggressive all the time?

No, but how would she know he's a dom if he didn't somehow give it away before getting in bed? That's the surprise part. And no, I'm not saying being aggro is the only possible way to give it away.

Why wouldn't it be a surprise? I don't think it has anything to do with the fact that he's polite and friendly, I think it has everything to do with him not deliberately signaling it before the reveal.

I guess it makes me wonder how you, yourself, do that? Do your partners know you're a dom before they go to bed with you? How does that happen?

 

[GOODLUCKEVA]

A guy is not going to get into my bed unless he is polite and friendly. He does not need to dominate but I do like a man that knows what he likes and is willing to take it when it is offered. In other words, fuck me like you really need and want me.

It sounds like you have a clear sense of what you want in a partner, which is really important. It's all about finding that balance between confidence and respect. A man who knows what he wants and approaches you with kindness can create an incredibly intimate experience.

 

[rudrakshpathak]

Gentleman in the streets, freak in the sheets is my favorite type of person to have sex with. It's like you get to see the side of the person which the world doesn't get to see and that makes it so special

This is what makes it so special.
Often it's overlooked that men may need to feel "safe" or wanted enough to let that side of theirs be revealed.
Many of the people who know me in real life will be utterly surprised by my behavior in bed.
Also what Islander said, basic human decency is always a pre-requisite

 

[GOODLUCKEVA]

This is what makes it so special.
Often it's overlooked that men may need to feel "safe" or wanted enough to let that side of theirs be revealed.
Many of the people who know me in real life will be utterly surprised by my behavior in bed.
Also what Islander said, basic human decency is always a pre-requisite

Absolutely! It's like the ultimate plot twist in a rom-com—who knew that behind the charming exterior, there's a softer, more vulnerable side just waiting to be unleashed? It's like the secret bonus level in a video game!

And you're spot on about that need for safety. It's amazing how a little warmth and kindness can turn a guy into a total romantic hero—who knew basic human decency was the key to unlocking the full “bedroom superhero” mode?

So, do you think we need to start handing out "trust badges" for everyone to earn before they enter the bedroom? Because I'd be first in line for mine!

 

[Sappho_CGN]

Machos are not dominant. Machos pretend to be dominant.

From my view self-assure men do not play the alpha-male-silverback as they do not need that.

 

[subdudeme13]

Machos are not dominant. Machos pretend to be dominant.

From my view self-assure men do not play the alpha-male-silverback as they do not need that.

I am a submissive guy. On the other hand I have been acccused of being dominant during sex and doing things I didn't even realize I do. One time my lover asked me why I was holding her down when I didn't realize I was doing it. I admit I love to torture with pleasure those that can have myltiple orgasams and the chemistry is right.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

The contrast between sweet, gentle boy and ravenous beast is so delicious. I love knowing that I’m the cause of his transformation. When he gets that look in his eye and makes it clear that he’s so turned on by me that he won’t … he can’t … hold back. Pinning me underneath him, holding my hands over my head, thrusting hard, desperate to get as deep inside me as possible … .

 

[Bisexguy70]

The contrast between sweet, gentle boy and ravenous beast is so delicious. I love knowing that I’m the cause of his transformation. When he gets that look in his eye and makes it clear that he’s so turned on by me that he won’t … he can’t … hold back. Pinning me underneath him, holding my hands over my head, thrusting hard, desperate to get as deep inside me as possible … .

I havent been able to fuck my wife like that in a long long time. Im always playing with other men and usually just sucking each others cock. But boy what I wouldnt give to just have some good ole fashion straight sex. My cock got so hard picturing myself being able to pin a woman down and ravishing her with my dick getting so deep in her pussy she feels it in her throat!

 

[magic_rat]

And of course he needs to be OK with me not being a one man woman.

You just described me perfectly.

 

[Sappho_CGN]

The contrast between sweet, gentle boy and ravenous beast is so delicious. I love knowing that I’m the cause of his transformation. When he gets that look in his eye and makes it clear that he’s so turned on by me that he won’t … he can’t … hold back. Pinning me underneath him, holding my hands over my head, thrusting hard, desperate to get as deep inside me as possible … .

I call that "playing with the tamed tiger" ... he is dangerous, it is dangerous but you have tamed him and he will not harm you ...

 

[magic_rat]

I guess it makes me wonder how you, yourself, do that? Do your partners know you're a dom before they go to bed with you? How does that happen?

I swing so there are few secrets. I'm naturally confident and up-front. But what happens in the bedroom is variable; I'm totally responsive to feedback. I can dial up the dom side or reel it in depending on how my partner is responding. I know if I overstep to pull back a bit or to go harder if I get a positive response, or try adding something like orgasm denial or mild breath play into the mix. I have under'bed restraints on my bed which come in useful quite often.

If we've already had the discussion, we'll use safewords or the traffic light system (green=go, amber=slow down, back off, or do something else, red=stop everything right now!) Tends to work well with more experienced subs.

The joy is in exploring the unknown. I've been with ladies who've never had a dom partner before who've loved it. A couple who've hated it and preferred to either be in charge themselves or for it to be an equal power exchange (big fun too).

Biggest eye opener was the lady who responded to my attempts at domming by fighting back and I discovered her primal side. Sex became conquest, extremely rough, biting and scratching, and both covered in bruises by the end. We both found it very exciting and get together often, as it's something neither her partner or mine are interested in.

 

[Travler99921]

I met with a guy in his hotel room. He was very polite. He was not a very big guy. When we got undressed I discovered his cock was smaller then mine. We were about the same length, but mine was much thicker.
We played with each other for some time. Then he surprised me by telling me he wanted to fuck me. He was very polite about it. I was in no way forced..

I said yes. It would be my first time. He lubricated me and himself. Then he penetrated me with a finger. He asked me if I was comfortable. He kept asking as he inserted more fingers. Finally he inserted his cock. Once he was in me he asked if he could start thrusting.

It was a great experience.

 

[Islander55]

It sounds like you have a clear sense of what you want in a partner, which is really important. It's all about finding that balance between confidence and respect. A man who knows what he wants and approaches you with kindness can create an incredibly intimate experience.

A man needs to respect me as a person to get anywhere. Once that is established then we can figure out what we both like and see if we are a good fit.

 

[GOODLUCKEVA]

I met with a guy in his hotel room. He was very polite. He was not a very big guy. When we got undressed I discovered his cock was smaller then mine. We were about the same length, but mine was much thicker.
We played with each other for some time. Then he surprised me by telling me he wanted to fuck me. He was very polite about it. I was in no way forced..

I said yes. It would be my first time. He lubricated me and himself. Then he penetrated me with a finger. He asked me if I was comfortable. He kept asking as he inserted more fingers. Finally he inserted his cock. Once he was in me he asked if he could start thrusting.

It was a great experience.

Well, sounds like he really took the time to make sure you were comfortable every step of the way. That's definitely a win in the 'thoughtfulness' department! First times can be full of surprises, but it's always great when things go smoothly and everyone's on the same page. Cheers to new experiences and a little unexpected adventure!

 

[GOODLUCKEVA]

A man needs to respect me as a person to get anywhere. Once that is established then we can figure out what we both like and see if we are a good fit.

Absolutely, respect is the foundation of everything. Without it, nothing else can really flourish. Once that's there, it's all about finding that balance and discovering what works for both people. It's all about chemistry and communication, right?

 

[Islander55]

Absolutely, respect is the foundation of everything. Without it, nothing else can really flourish. Once that's there, it's all about finding that balance and discovering what works for both people. It's all about chemistry and communication, right?

I think communications is the key and is often over looked.

 

[rudrakshpathak]

Absolutely! It's like the ultimate plot twist in a rom-com—who knew that behind the charming exterior, there's a softer, more vulnerable side just waiting to be unleashed? It's like the secret bonus level in a video game!

And you're spot on about that need for safety. It's amazing how a little warmth and kindness can turn a guy into a total romantic hero—who knew basic human decency was the key to unlocking the full “bedroom superhero” mode?

So, do you think we need to start handing out "trust badges" for everyone to earn before they enter the bedroom? Because I'd be first in line for mine!

Haha that badge idea sure sounds good!

I think in our pursuit for intimacy we often overlook the basic social setup that makes us reluctant to accept our more intense sides. It's different for everyone so it may not be the case everywhere but I've observed it to mostly be so.

Bedroom Superheroes are also often made because of knowing that they're also wanted for who they are so the performance anxiety vanishes.

 

[DayDreaming2407]

I have yet to experience this. I hope to soon though.