I'm preparing to steal the 2024 election, just like we did in 2020. Are you?

[RoryN]

Here's my list of tools for the job so far:

*Fake mail-in ballots
*Space lasers
*Pizza
*Obamas
*Dead people who vote
*Haitians
*Cats, dogs and geese to feed the Haitians
*Three Mike Pences
*Memes

What's in your toolbox?

 

[ll74]

I'm swinging by Springfield and grabbing a bunch of Haitians to vote with me. Also will be having the rest fill out absentee ballots to drop off at the ballot box.

I'm going to coax them with my cats.

 

[RoryN]

Someone suggested I get a jackhammer to break up a section of the border wall, so that illegal immigrants can come in and vote.

But it's very difficult to find a completed section to break apart...probably because Mexico still hasn’t paid their bill for it.

 

[Lazaran]

D.O.M.I.N.I.O.N.

 

[coati]

As a MSM outreach officer of the Deep State, I have my marching orders to publish every embarrassing statement and action made by Deep State patsy Donald Trump.

Our plan to steal the next election from the GOP is coming together perfectly!

 

[Lazaran]

As a MSM outreach officer of the Deep State, I have my marching orders to publish every embarrassing statement and action made by Deep State patsy Donald Trump.

Our plan to steal the next election from the GOP is coming together perfectly!

^
Diabolical!!!

 

[MajorRewrite]

I replaced 100,000 people in my city with illegal immigrants that came from other nations emptying their prisons.

They’re all going to use mail-in voting.

 

[MajorRewrite]

Here's my list of tools for the job so far:

*Fake mail-in ballots
*Space lasers
*Pizza
*Obamas
*Dead people who vote
*Haitians
*Cats, dogs and geese to feed the Haitians
*Three Mike Pences
*Memes

What's in your toolbox?

Question: do they have to be Jewish space lasers, or will any space lasers do?

 

[deckardB26354]

Feel free to meet me at Kinko’s. I’m throwing a ballot printing party!

 

[butters]

i'm gonna pull a donOld and just think it... that makes it real, don't ya know?

 

[doowdniw]

Vote early - and often.

 

[John_von_Neumann]

I'm collecting donations for illegal immigrants to get gender reassignment surgery in prison. Consider it quid pro quo for voting Harris/Walz.

 

[Lazaran]

Apparently, someone tried to steal the election with an AR style weapon…

 

[RoryN]

Question: do they have to be Jewish space lasers, or will any space lasers do?

All space lasers are Jewish!

 

[ll74]

All space lasers are Jewish!

What?

Does that mean someone sold me a fake?

Mother fucker!

 

[TomTeacher19]

Stealing it by having more votes? Sure thing

 

[Philthy_Phil]

Free cats for all haitians who vote!

edit: rory already used this idea

 

[RoryN]

How is this going so far?

There's another thread saying we've started...

 

[RoryN]

I have begun my efforts in stealing the election: I am telling people to vote for Harris.

I am sure they will arrest me soon.

 

[Bn2f]

On my way to Michigan now to get the batch of Chinese ballots I ordered to be brought in from Canada.

 

[Rotadom]

I'm going to make sure all US military members stationed overseas are allowed to vote.

 

[Bn2f]

Believe it or not, James Comey is my next door neighbor! And though he swears to me daily that he’s not an attention whore, if anyone has a croissant and an iPhone, he says he will claim the FBI is investigating whatever candidate you want.

 

[coati]

I continue to work diligently in my capacity as a Deep State agent. We successfully created and directed the path of Hurricane Heline to disrupt Red states, and are now doing the same with Milton. Our use of witchcraft in the Harris campaign is working perfectly.

 

[RobDownSouth]

I've drawn the unenviable job of taking a census in Chicago area graveyards and compiling a list of names and birth dates of everyone who has passed away since the 2020 election. These names will, of course, be used to "vote" against Trump on election day.

 

[Rotadom]

I've drawn the unenviable job of taking a census in Chicago area graveyards and compiling a list of names and birth dates of everyone who has passed away since the 2020 election. These names will, of course, be used to "vote" against Trump on election day.

You're doing yeoman's work