Watching wife get fucked

For me my husband first suggested it during sex… like dirty talk which surprised me. Didn’t really know how to react. He kept bringing it up and clearly getting more aroused which was enough to let me think about it. We were undergoing a LOT of changes in our sexual relationship with left me without a man who wanted to fuck me. That is what really drove me to think and start fantasizing about it, then making it happen, with multiple men and another woman.
Yeah we had a similar beginning. It is quite erotic watching her with others. How was your 1st experience?
 
The "bull" bullshit is just that. Enjoy what is happening. A man who denigrates or disrespects the woman's husband is not a man, just an asshole and not worthy of what he is getting.

I dislike the term bull. It seems to suggest that the other man is the one in charge and/or that the other man is intrinsically superior to my husband. My husband is typically submissive to me because that is the way we both like it. And I generally treat the other man as an 'equal' in terms of my demeanour. But the bottom line is that he is a guest so if it comes right down to it I am in charge. And he does not treat my husband as submissive either unless that is a role we all want and that trust has been earned.

We are not a couple in need of a bull to satisfy me or us. We are a sexually adventurous couple inviting another man to share in those adventures. There may be some role play and kinky stuff, but disrespect is not permitted.
 
I dislike the term bull. It seems to suggest that the other man is the one in charge and/or that the other man is intrinsically superior to my husband. My husband is typically submissive to me because that is the way we both like it. And I generally treat the other man as an 'equal' in terms of my demeanour. But the bottom line is that he is a guest so if it comes right down to it I am in charge. And he does not treat my husband as submissive either unless that is a role we all want and that trust has been earned.

We are not a couple in need of a bull to satisfy me or us. We are a sexually adventurous couple inviting another man to share in those adventures. There may be some role play and kinky stuff, but disrespect is not permitted.
You are so right. The gentle tease and humiliation, if appropriate, should come from the wife. However, in certain scenarios and role plays, if all parties are on the same page, I have been asked to participate. BTW, as I have told you before, I love your wisdom and thoughts on these issues
 
I dislike the term bull. It seems to suggest that the other man is the one in charge and/or that the other man is intrinsically superior to my husband.
Well said...

I also hate the term Cuckhold for the same reason.

If anyone ever said to me, "Letting your wife have sex with another man means you're a cuckhold and you're weak!"

I'd reply, "No it doesn't. It means I love my wife and am secure enough in our marriage to let her seek pleasure from whomever she wants. And if I watch it's because I enjoy seeing her enjoy herself AND because my being there makes her feel safe. ..I feel no humiliation whatsoever. ..And I won't let you tell me otherwise. Letting my wife be with other men makes me feel strong and confident."

And any "Bull" who would get off on humiliating a husband is too big of a douchebag to be trusted with that man's wife. It's not hard imaging such a pig NOT respecting the woman's boundaries during sex.
 
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Well said...

I also hate the term Cuckhold for the same reason.

If anyone ever said to me, "Letting your wife have sex with another man means you're a cuckhold!"

I'd reply, "No it doesn't. It means I love my wife and am secure enough in our marriage to let her seek pleasure from whomever she wants. And I if I watch it's because I enjoy seeing her enjoy herself AND because my being there makes her feel safe. ..I feel no humiliation whatsoever. ..And I won't let you tell me otherwise."

And any "Bull" who would get off on humiliating a husband is too big of a douchbag to be trusted with that man's wife. It's not hard imaging such an ass NOT respecting the woman's boundaries during sex.
I totally agree. That's exactly how I feel.
 
Well said...

I also hate the term Cuckhold for the same reason.

If anyone ever said to me, "Letting your wife have sex with another man means you're a cuckhold!"

I'd reply, "No it doesn't. It means I love my wife and am secure enough in our marriage to let her seek pleasure from whomever she wants. And I if I watch it's because I enjoy seeing her enjoy herself AND because my being there makes her feel safe. ..I feel no humiliation whatsoever. ..And I won't let you tell me otherwise. Letting my wife be with other men makes me feel strong and confident."

And any "Bull" who would get off on humiliating a husband is too big of a douchbag to be trusted with that man's wife. It's not hard imaging such a pig NOT respecting the woman's boundaries during sex.

I understand. I have approached the word cuckold a bit differently. I tend to feel that if your wife has sex with other men while you are exclusive to her then the term applies. But it need not come with any of the humiliation or fetish dynamic that people often associate with the word.

To each their own. Nobody should be referred to in a way that they find objectionable.
 
I tend to feel that if your wife has sex with other men while you are exclusive to her then the term applies.
I"m not trying to nitpick but even if that was the case, I'd still strongly reject a label that brands a man as being weak because he allows his wife to purse sexual gratification outside their marriage. Maybe they both adore each other, intend to live out their lives together, but her libido is a 10/10, while his is a mere 1/10 - perhaps (though not necessarily) because of health problems. We don't have an insulting term for a woman who tells her husband, "I still want you as my husband but I'm done with sex - so you have my blessing to pursue it w/ other women." So why have a such a label for men?

Not to put too fine a point on it, but to me a Cuck is someone whose wife has sex w/ other men AGAINST his wishes. And he's too weak, lacking in confidence or perhaps too "addicted" to whatever affection she gives him to leave her over it. ..So he resigns himself to the constant humiliation despite being emotionally harmed by it.
 
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I"m not trying to nitpick but even if that was the case, I'd still strongly reject a label that brands a man as being weak because he allows his wife to purse sexual gratification outside their marriage. Maybe they both adore each other, intend to live out their lives together, but her libido is a 10/10, while his is a mere 1/10 - perhaps (though not necessarily) because of health problems. We don't have an insulting term for a woman who tells her husband, "I still want you as my husband but I'm done with sex - so you have my blessing to pursue it w/ other women." So why have a such a label for men?

Not to put too fine a point on it, but to me a Cuck is someone who's wife has sex w/ other men AGAINST he wishes. And he's too weak and lacking in confidence to leave her over it. ..So he resigns himself to the constant humiliation despite being emotionally harmed by it.

We can debate the definitions. I always regarded the traditional or original definition as assuming humiliation or her acting against the man's wishes because people could not imagine it to be any other way. Yet there are historical or literary contexts (i.e. Anna Karenina) where the man was aware of his wife's sexual activity and accepting of it but was still labelled a cuckold.

In any event, we are in agreement that the circumstance contemplated need not include humiliation or disrespect regardless of the label.

On both points I can think of analogies:
  • As it relates to definition: For many women the "slut" is intrinsically offensive. But to the extent that it simply means a woman with liberal sexual attitudes I see it as something to be reclaimed. I am a slut. I just don't see that as a bad thing and I don't accept the premise that I should be shamed even if my behaviour does fit the definition. As you say (except in reverse) if there is no male equivalent of a slut then why have such a label for women. Some seek to eliminate or eschew it, where I seek to reclaim it. There is no right or wrong, only preference.
  • As it relates to pre-conception: It wasn't that long ago that a homosexual male was assumed to be weak. That was part of the narrative to judge and reject gay men. But not withstanding stereotypes we know that sexual preference has nothing to do with weakness. Some gay men embrace certain terms used to define them and others reject them. All that matters is that we respect their choice in how they would like to be addressed.
 
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