Writing makes it better/worse

[nice90sguy]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

 

[StillStunned]

Sorry to hear that!

For me personally, writing can make me unhappy if I'm forcing it, for example if I'm stressed or too busy with work and I feel that I need to finish something.

 

[ElectricBlue]

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

Nope. I write because I want to, not because I need to. No self-therapy going on here.

 

[Bazzle]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

I get myself into plot cul de sacs, so have to stop writing. I literally hit a wall.

But to get myself out of it, I tend to jump fetish or write a non fiction smoking model piece on Reddit to at least keep writing, but stimulate myself in other ways.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

I think that writing stories that focus on sexual content can "overporn" your mind if you overdo it. So I think it depends on the type of stories one writes.
Personally, I am in a strange situation where I do want to keep writing and I still feel the drive to do it, and there is even "pressure" from my readers, but I am unsatisfied with the platforms that are currently available. Maybe something will come up or change, but at the moment I am at some strange impasse
Anyway, I am sorry to hear about your specific case. It does seem unusual as writing is escapism for many people and it usually makes people feel better rather than worse. Maybe try writing a different type of story? Maybe a more positive one, maybe one without much sexual content? Something uplifting, some AI SciFi as that seems to be one of your themes? Just making a suggestion.
Be well.

 

[mildlyaroused]

Writing can cause a lot of stress for me. The 'writer' in me is part of my identity (both personally and externally), and always has been; and consequently when I'm struggling to write it does affect me. I turn myself inside out working things through. Sometimes I envy my friends and family who leave the house every morning as I stay home and get lost in my head. Sometimes it's lonely and oftentimes it's frustrating. But through it all it's been my passion. Both in a cathartic way, as you say, but also just because it's bloody fun.

All the best with everything on your end, and good luck reconciling your creative pursuits with mental wellbeing. Maybe some non-erotic works could be a fun outlet?

 

[Devinter]

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing).

I am sorry to hear that, but I want to commend you for recognizing the negative pattern and taking the necessary steps to break it. Few have that kind of self-awareness.

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

Some weeks, I absolutely do have to stop writing as it's suffocating me. Especially when I have too much to deal with at work. The past six weeks or so have been rather difficult and I've had to force myself to get things finished.

Other weeks, however, it's the complete opposite. Then it would negatively affect my well-being if I didn't write, since it's probably my greatest passion, and engaging in things that one feel is uplifting is incredibly important. So it varies. I'm hoping to be able to get back to this "writing is wonderful" state of mind as soon as possible.

 

[KeithD]

Nope. I write because I want to, not because I need to. No self-therapy going on here.

Same here, although I recognize that it could change.

 

[Djmac1031]

Sorry to hear of your struggles. My general philosophy is if doing something is causing negativity not positivity, take a break from it.

Genius philosophy, I know right?

I find writing to still be a positive. When I'm in the mood.

What I'm finding negative is the mood I find myself in when I wanna write but the words aren't coming or I simply can't focus.

But trying to force it is pointless. So I try not to beat myself up over it.

It's supposed to be fun. If it's not fun at the moment, wait til it becomes fun again.

 

[nice90sguy]

Just to be clear, my personal issues here aren't major, and the OP wasn't a cry for help, but thanks for the sympathy posts!

I'm basically a creature of (mostly bad) habit, and maybe stopping writing/porn is just a "giving up for Lent" detox thing. Although I hope it lasts longer than that, frankly.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Just to be clear, my personal issues here aren't major, and the OP wasn't a cry for help, but thanks for the sympathy posts!

I'm basically a creature of (mostly bad) habit, and maybe stopping writing/porn is just a "giving up for Lent" detox thing. Although I hope it lasts longer than that, frankly.

You can publish non-fiction essays on here, although very heavy political or religious themes might be a problem. (I don't think the site truly defines that.) I've done quite a few, mostly "memoirs" I guess you could call them. People may think that they have had a dull life, but everybody's got stories to tell if they ponder their memories.

If I may ask, who is that person with the pipe in your avatar?

 

[pink_silk_glove]

Writing is always good to me. Even when it keeps me from doing the chores, or from being social, or disrupts my eating and sleeping. Any ill-effects are easily outweighed by the satisfaction of getting the piece done and knowing that when I die I won't be regretting not getting it done. When I'm 99 and on my death bed I won't be regretting not doing the dishes or taking out the recycling. I won't be regretting taking six months off between jobs instead of three and letting my bank account dwindle much lower than I should. Writing is what I want to achieve and I'm getting it done.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

Sometimes I get accused of not having enough sex in my stories. Some of them don't even have sex depicted, although some character (or two) will talk about an experience that they've had (or wished they could have). There is one story on Lit that is truly non-erotic, although I put some break-up stories there too. Some Romance readers will get annoyed if such tales get into "their" section.

Overall, my mental heath is improved a lot by writing about anything.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

Sometimes I get accused of not having enough sex in my stories.

I get that all the time.

I write 11k words and 2k of it is sex, very steamy sex. Doesn't matter how steamy. It's "non-erotic at best." Two different readers said so. 9k to 2k story to smut ratio just doesn't cut it with them.

I write 12.5k words and nearly 6k very steamy sex, I get "Why the plot twist at the end? Can't we just have a sexy story?" Sneak a little plot into a steamy stroker and get called on it.

Most readers don't want your plot. The female readers tend to like my plot more, the male readers not so much. Since this is essentially a porn site, male readers dominate.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

The female readers tend to like my plot more, the male readers not so much. Since this is essentially a porn site, male readers dominate.

There are exceptions, maybe a significant number of them, but I would still say that as a rule, men respond much better to stories written by a man and vice versa. Even though I mentioned already that my sexual brain prefers the idea of enjoying a smut story written by a woman, I still find stories written by male authors more appealing in content and style.

That fact doesn't surprise me one bit when it comes to mainstream writing, but in smut, I would really expect a different experience.
Strange.

 

[gunhilltrain]

There are exceptions, maybe a significant number of them, but I would still say that as a rule, men respond much better to stories written by a man and vice versa. Even though I mentioned already that my sexual brain prefers the idea of enjoying a smut story written by a woman, I still find stories written by male authors more appealing in content and style.

That fact doesn't surprise me one bit when it comes to mainstream writing, but in smut, I would really expect a different experience.

One can view this site as porn or not. However, that's fine. Everybody can write the way they wish to do it. The last five stories I've published here were written as female first-person. The next one, almost done, will be that way too. (It doesn't have Nora in it.) It took more than five years of experience before I could do that.

nice90sguy: now I remember our exchange about the Remington Typewriter and Mombasa, Kenya. I've been on AH too much recently (again) and I can't keep track of what I said a week ago.

 

[nice90sguy]

If I may ask, who is that person with the pipe in your avatar?

J. L. Austin (who looks nothing like me)

 

[gunhilltrain]

J. L. Austin (who looks nothing like me)

I did have to look him up. If anybody else is interested, these are about him.

https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/austin-jl/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J._L._Austin

 

[gunhilltrain]

I get that all the time.

I write 11k words and 2k of it is sex, very steamy sex. Doesn't matter how steamy. It's "non-erotic at best." Two different readers said so. 9k to 2k story to smut ratio just doesn't cut it with them.

I write 12.5k words and nearly 6k very steamy sex, I get "Why the plot twist at the end? Can't we just have a sexy story?" Sneak a little plot into a steamy stroker and get called on it.

Most readers don't want your plot. The female readers tend to like my plot more, the male readers not so much. Since this is essentially a porn site, male readers dominate.

Tell them that if they don't like the site, there are plenty of "real" porn sites (mostly videos now) that they can go to. Many of them charge nothing to view. Like what was supposed to happen with electricity, porn has become too cheap to meter.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

Tell them that if they don't like the site, there are plenty of "real" porn sites (mostly videos now) that they can go to. Many of them charge nothing to view. Like what was supposed to happen with electricity, porn has become too cheap to meter.

That's where they come from. Where do you think literotica puts its ad banners? Here's a hint: it's not youtube nor kijiji.

 

[dadadadiox]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

Writing is therapeutic for me. I call it opening the spigot. My mind is overly active. I can be driving, see something unusual occur, and have an idea for a story… and my mind runs with it. This is both a blessing and a curse as I have dozens of half baked ideas I’ve started after the inspiration but never completed.

Writing these ideas down, whether it’s fiction or actual problems in life, has always been helpful. I may not follow it through to completion, but just opening the spigot to release the pressure is cathartic.

This has little to do with my fiction writing hobby or desire to try my hand at erotica. I’ve been writing to clear my mind for decades. Rarely does it make me feel worse. I suppose I’m fortunate.

 

[lustychimera]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

Not really stopping "for the sake of" my mental health. More like I've got it all out of my system and can go back to writing more innocent things. I'll go hard on the smut writing for a little while, drop it completely, then come back when I get a wild hair and write it for a while again.

I'm not really someone who can write those two things in tandem.

But my stuff does really push a lot of limits, and I do think it'd be pretty unhealthy to hang out in that headspace for too long. It's more like a vent than anything.

 

[Wonderer67]

Some people write here to entertain. We all know it's fun, and cool to develop and share a talent. In my case a lot of my writing is catharsis, getting stuff out of my system.

Recently I've written a lot (I posted five or six stories in the last couple of weeks), and it's had a really negative effect on me -- rekindling my porn-addiction (don't laugh, it's a real thing). My personal life is currently full of stresses, anxieties, fear and loneliness, making me really vulnerable to relapse. And writing only makes it worse.

So I'm taking one of my periodic breaks from writing (not from the forum, which doesn't trigger my addiction).

Are there any other writers here who feel that they need to stop writing for the sake of their own mental well-being?

I’m sorry to hear about your struggles.

I agree to a point but I mostly wrote poetry.

I wrote to get shit outta my head. I have at times found writing to be cathartic and slightly retriggering.

I have stopped because I just can’t take any more. So I think maybe I understand what you mean.

But if it’s a negative things for you, it’s prob worth stopping and evaluating how you feel over time.

 

[intim8]

rekindling my porn-addiction

I'm finding that writing is slowly ruining porn for me, even the written kind. Not a "knowing how the sausage is made" thing, but because I guess I'm finding out as I write that the sex itself isn't really what I'm after.

 

[gunhilltrain]

That's where they come from. Where do you think literotica puts its ad banners? Here's a hint: it's not youtube nor kijiji.

So it's a bait and switch then? The problem with these readers is that they may or may not realize that Lit doesn't set the "sexiness" tone of the thousands (?) of writers on here. Lit rejects stories for a lot of reasons, but I haven't seen lack of sexiness as one of those reasons. I have seen those ads, but some outside reviewers may give the wrong impression too, especially for those who read only the first paragraph or two.

An example is from some site called Popsugar, which in the second paragraph states, "erotica is defined as 'literature or art intended to arouse sexual desire,' " per the Oxford Dictionary." What about stories that describe sex that is disappointing, disgusting, or emotionally draining,or which talk about the pain of being dumped, cheated on, or going through the natural break-up of a relationship? There are stories on here covering those topics too.

So in that article, Lit is the very first site listed . "The best part? Literotica is completely free." Careless readers may only notice what I mentioned above. I wonder about the suckers who wind up reading some of my stuff.