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Eat It Like You Mean It Part 3

ImiGirrst said:
Sometimes. Other times, well, I just don't have words. The more turned on I get, the more non verbal I become. Sometimes I am self aware enough to grab hair and push my partner into me. Other times I just lose the world except for my clit. I've learned that I have to communicate this to my partner, who is worrying that no response means a bad job, when in fact it's more than damn good.
Click to expand...
Reminds me of the time I was eating out my wife, and she'd kinda stopped moving. Not changing positions, I reached up to see if I could tweak a nipple or something ANYTHING, to get a response out her. Only to find her hands had a firm grasp of her own tits, and she was pinching her own nipples. I went back to what I was doing. By this time I was chin-deep in her pussy. She came so hard, her thighs squeezed my head so freaking tight, thinking not a bad way to have an aneurism....All this, from what I thought was, "she's getting bored with this. Time to move on."
 
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ImiGirrst said:
Thanks for the reply. I agree that it's important to communicate with new partners, so that's kinda why I wanted to get independent data. I don't want to come across as unreasonable, when I might blurt out, "That's it? Well, my OTHER partners didn't give up that quick..." I mean, really - is there a better way to have instant deflation?

I recognize that while we might have the same parts, our wiring might be slightly different. I've found that I have a sensitive clit to start out with, but I have to tell my partner that it means they've hit the right spot, not that I want them to go away. I've learned that is something I have to clarify right away. And it's definitely true of me as well that when I go off, well, I too want penetration right then and there. It's like finally catching the wave that can be ridden all the way down the beach. If you wait, you might not be able to ride at all. Again, people are different.

To be clear - I'm talking about how long it takes to get the first O.



Thank you for the complement. I'm also touched that you noticed this.

I'll be honest with you, I kinda feel like this question is about putting me first. Having had a few new lovers this year, I've only had one that I felt went down on me long enough. And the length of time wasn't even enough for me to even relax a bit, never mind really get wound up. Now, if one had been like this, I would have considered it an outlier. But when it gets to be several, then I have to wonder about my data set.

I've ruled out that something might be tasting weird. I've also been wondering if the group that has been short has potentially been so turned on they haven't been able to wait. And I've considered that maybe there are partners in there that really didn't like muff diving, and removed those. But if someone says that like eating out their partner and only spend a couple of 5 minutes or so, that seems like a real mixed message.
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Not to repeat all the great responses here. I have been married for 30+years. I love to give my wife pleasure orally. She tells me that she has had many lovers before me, but no one does to her what I do. Now she may just be saying this to bolster my ego, but 30+ years of great sex says something. With that said, I will often spend 45 minutes to 1 1/2 hrs eating out my wife. This process takes time. I need to sense her mood and I spend a great deal of time running through all my tools to discover what movement or pace or pressure or location is going to work that day. I listen carefully to her body. I can sense when she is rising up the wave, then I know she is on the ride. I am also aware when she feels too much pressure to perform. I reassure her often and often show my enthusiasm to play her instrument until the end. Sometimes she just gives up, but most times, she has 2 to 3 orgasms. Once the gates open, she rides the wave. Penetration always follows immediately after. Her moans are so worth it!
I hope this data point helps your cause. You are not alone, but find the right person who is more interested in meeting your needs rather than their own, and your sex life will be awesome!
Oh, and by the way, I love the taste and smell of pussy. Especially after climax when the juices start flowing. I swallow every drop of that honey!
 
ImiGirrst said:
Sometimes. Other times, well, I just don't have words. The more turned on I get, the more non verbal I become. Sometimes I am self aware enough to grab hair and push my partner into me. Other times I just lose the world except for my clit. I've learned that I have to communicate this to my partner, who is worrying that no response means a bad job, when in fact it's more than damn good.
Click to expand...
I find that usually the way she grabs my hair and pulls my face deeper into her pussy does seem to indicate that she's enjoying what I'm doing...
 
ImiGirrst said:
Thanks for the reply. I agree that it's important to communicate with new partners, so that's kinda why I wanted to get independent data. I don't want to come across as unreasonable, when I might blurt out, "That's it? Well, my OTHER partners didn't give up that quick..." I mean, really - is there a better way to have instant deflation?

I recognize that while we might have the same parts, our wiring might be slightly different. I've found that I have a sensitive clit to start out with, but I have to tell my partner that it means they've hit the right spot, not that I want them to go away. I've learned that is something I have to clarify right away. And it's definitely true of me as well that when I go off, well, I too want penetration right then and there. It's like finally catching the wave that can be ridden all the way down the beach. If you wait, you might not be able to ride at all. Again, people are different.

To be clear - I'm talking about how long it takes to get the first O.



Thank you for the complement. I'm also touched that you noticed this.

I'll be honest with you, I kinda feel like this question is about putting me first. Having had a few new lovers this year, I've only had one that I felt went down on me long enough. And the length of time wasn't even enough for me to even relax a bit, never mind really get wound up. Now, if one had been like this, I would have considered it an outlier. But when it gets to be several, then I have to wonder about my data set.

I've ruled out that something might be tasting weird. I've also been wondering if the group that has been short has potentially been so turned on they haven't been able to wait. And I've considered that maybe there are partners in there that really didn't like muff diving, and removed those. But if someone says that like eating out their partner and only spend a couple of 5 minutes or so, that seems like a real mixed message.
Click to expand...
One thing we all know is part of the fun and excitement with a new lover is exploring and finding out what works and what doesn't, but it can also be a challenge and patience is required. And even saying that, as I believe you've alluded to, the same lover can react in different ways and crave different things day to day depending on mood, level of arousal, etc.

As to my partner and I, unless precluded by time or circumstance, she always gets at least her first O orally. Some days it might take as little as two to five minutes if she's in a state of extreme arousal prior to, i.e., from maybe incessant flirting which provides a mental stimulation and the building of sexual tension and anticipation beforehand, lots of erotic kissing which she loves, or even things like where she is in her cycle, her mood, and even where we might be, i.e., at home with kids and other distractions in the house or alone on vacation or at a hotel. Other times, for whatever the various reasons, it can take a half hour or longer.

In addition, her desired methods/techniques can also vary. Sometimes she's all about penetration with my tongue and/or fingers, other times wants incorporation of a rim session, and also often just about the clit. And even when she's all about the clit, that can vary too and she can desire softer action such as circling it with my tongue or light flicks, and other times want firmer and more constant pressure with not just the tip, but the entirety or flat part of my tongue.

Having been together for many years, I've become adept at mixing it up, reading her cues, and finding that special way that works for her that day, even if she doesn't know going in. That said, she does often also telegraph those cues quite clearly through either moans, what she does with her hands on my head, as well as actual verbalization. For instance, a few nights ago we had begun and I was starting with her clit when she whispered, "no, I want your tongue inside me." It just happened to be what she wanted and what got her off at that moment.

And sometimes the position you're in can be helpful. Often she will straddle my face, therefore being able to position her parts wherever it feels best that day in relation to my tongue, how far or close she wants it, and leaves no question as to how she wants it done. I know it can be uncomfortable sometimes for the woman, but she will lean against or grab the headboard with her hands for support, which helps. And the times when it takes a much longer amount of time for her to get there, I'll pull her to the edge of the bed with her legs over my shoulders while I kneel on the floor. That takes the pressure off of my neck and makes it far more comfortable for those times I spend an inordinate amount of time devouring her.

Sorry to ramble. But hopefully the issues you describe can be chalked up to just being new lovers and things will improve as you further explore if you, in fact, do. And also guys don't mind and usually fully welcome any insight into what you're wanting whether it's technique or time spent between your legs.
 
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