Anyone from the UK?

[AWonkyDonkey]

Lol not that I'm aware of. Although, knowing this lot (including myself in the group), it will have an alternative meaning. Prizes for the most imaginative answer

It made me think of this...

A refuse collector, is driving along a street in Oz picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his compactor.

He goes to one house where the bin hasn't been left out, and in the spirit of kindness, and after having a quick look about for the bin, he gets out of his truck goes to the front door and knocks.

There's no answer. Being a kindly and conscientious bloke, he knocks again - a bit harder and then harder still. Eventually a Chinese man comes to the door.

"Harro!" says the Chinese man.

"Gidday, mate! Where's ya bin?" asks the collector.

"I bin on toiret," explains the Chinese bloke, a bit perplexed.

Realising the fellow had misunderstood him, the bin man smiles and tries again.. "No! No! Mate, where’s your dust bin?"

"I dust been to toiret, I toll you!'' says the Chinese man, still perplexed.

"Listen," says the collector. "You're misunderstanding me. Where's your wheelie' bin?'"

"OK, OK." replies the Chinese man with a sheepish grin and whispers in the collector's ear. "I wheelie bin having sex wiffa wife's sista"

 

[Fufumberuk]

It made me think of this...

A refuse collector, is driving along a street in Oz picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his compactor.

He goes to one house where the bin hasn't been left out, and in the spirit of kindness, and after having a quick look about for the bin, he gets out of his truck goes to the front door and knocks.

There's no answer. Being a kindly and conscientious bloke, he knocks again - a bit harder and then harder still. Eventually a Chinese man comes to the door.

"Harro!" says the Chinese man.

"Gidday, mate! Where's ya bin?" asks the collector.

"I bin on toiret," explains the Chinese bloke, a bit perplexed.

Realising the fellow had misunderstood him, the bin man smiles and tries again.. "No! No! Mate, where’s your dust bin?"

"I dust been to toiret, I toll you!'' says the Chinese man, still perplexed.

"Listen," says the collector. "You're misunderstanding me. Where's your wheelie' bin?'"

"OK, OK." replies the Chinese man with a sheepish grin and whispers in the collector's ear. "I wheelie bin having sex wiffa wife's sista"

Brilliant!!!! You've earnt yourself a pint for that reply. Not sure how you can claim your prize? But top marks for speed and witt

 

[Anastasia1999]

I need to try and grab an early night tonight as I have to be up at the unearthly hour of 7am tomorrow. My solution? Get drunk.

There's only one 7 on my clock and it isn't in the morning.

That’s a bleedin‘ lie-in!!

 

[HornyKatie1979]

I'm more worried about my roof than the wheelie bins.

Also not a euphemism!

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Brilliant!!!! You've earnt yourself a pint for that reply. Not sure how you can claim your prize? But top marks for speed and witt

To be honest I heard it a couple of years back and it's always stayed with me. Similar to a joke about the SAS and the Taliban. I haven't forgotten it.

That’s a bleedin‘ lie-in!!

Hah! Considering I don't usually get to sleep until 3-5am, it's too early! You can get up for me then, show off.

 

[Wriggle]

 

[RosewoodTulip]

View attachment 2308386

I love forest friends

 

[Wriggle]

I love forest friends

They are so naughty for a Sylvanian Family parody account.

 

[Kat0069]

Hot bath would be amazing right now, except my kids are taking it in turns to hog the bathroom ah well, at least they are getting clean.

Edit: just saw all the other posts since the bath post. Now looks out of context. Ah well….

 

[HornyKatie1979]

Hot bath would be amazing right now, except my kids are taking it in turns to hog the bathroom ah well, at least they are getting clean.

Edit: just saw all the other posts since the bath post. Now looks out of context. Ah well….

I'd love a nice bath, but the one in my house is a weird shape - wide at the shower/tap end and then goes much narrower and the end my head/body goes, so it's uncomfortable to spend any time in. Bathroom's big enough for a decent bath - one day I'll have the money to change it out - dunno what the people who owned here before me were thinking.

 

[Fufumberuk]

I'd love a nice bath, but the one in my house is a weird shape - wide at the shower/tap end and then goes much narrower and the end my head/body goes, so it's uncomfortable to spend any time in. Bathroom's big enough for a decent bath - one day I'll have the money to change it out - dunno what the people who owned here before me were thinking.

Maybe it was installed for "specialist activities"?

 

[Spanky1372]

I'd love a nice bath, but the one in my house is a weird shape - wide at the shower/tap end and then goes much narrower and the end my head/body goes, so it's uncomfortable to spend any time in. Bathroom's big enough for a decent bath - one day I'll have the money to change it out - dunno what the people who owned here before me were thinking.

Well, I didn't like the bath before that one, the one I bought ( the one you have now) was built by a shortsighted friend of mine. Looking back on it I should have paid him more than a fiver.

 

[HornyKatie1979]

Maybe it was installed for "specialist activities"?

Given the state of other "DIY" projects around the house I've had to either redo properly myself or get someone in for, I think the previous owner got it cheap and fitted it himself.

 

[Fufumberuk]

Given the state of other "DIY" projects around the house I've had to either redo properly myself or get someone in for, I think the previous owner got it cheap and fitted it himself.

That's very common. Bodge it and scarper

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

I'd love a nice bath, but the one in my house is a weird shape - wide at the shower/tap end and then goes much narrower and the end my head/body goes, so it's uncomfortable to spend any time in. Bathroom's big enough for a decent bath - one day I'll have the money to change it out - dunno what the people who owned here before me were thinking.

You can come use mine! Er.. just ignore the cameras in the ceiling. Oh sorry. Did I say cameras? I meant ermm.. security lights! Yes.

*Coughs*

 

[Tigertiger55]

Well, full, slightly squiffy and definately felt the storm walking back from the pub after a few beers and a bottle of red ! Am I naive to hope it clears off overnight so I don’t get stranded out on my travels down south tommorow

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Well, full, slightly squiffy and definately felt the storm walking back from the pub after a few beers and a bottle of red ! Am I naive to hope it clears off overnight so I don’t get stranded out on my travels down south tommorow

Apparently it's due to clear off sometime tomorrow morning.

 

[HornyKatie1979]

Yeah, forecast says it's gonna be battering Kent until tomorrow morning.

*battens down hatches*

 

[Wand3rlust]

Yep. It's really giving it some here..

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Pah! T'is nowt for us hardened Northern folk. T'storm is just a little 'un.

Oh sorry. I forgot my Yorkshire translator has gone to bed.

 

[Hodes101]

Booooo Sunday night. Got that day before school feeling.

Evening UK

 

[Hodes101]

No one else feeling that way. Or all just listening to the wind?

 

[HornyKatie1979]

No one else feeling that way. Or all just listening to the wind?

Both!

 

[Lucy351]

Yep Sunday night feeling here too

 

[NorthernCardinal]

Almost had my back door blown off.

Any port in a storm