I'm Desperate to Jerk Off, and I'm Out of Lotion, so Gonna Try Mayonnaise...

[SmokingFap]

Yup. Don't feel like going back out to the store. Did a minimal amount of research, seems mayo is at least safe and possibly enjoyable, although definitely need a shower afterwards. I saw that coconut oil was highly recommended, as well as olive oil. Don't have those. Anyone else tried mayo? Other food products? I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

 

[Tony195756]

Olive oil works really well

 

[Tony195756]

Yup. Don't feel like going back out to the store. Did a minimal amount of research, seems mayo is at least safe and possibly enjoyable, although definitely need a shower afterwards. I saw that coconut oil was highly recommended, as well as olive oil. Don't have those. Anyone else tried mayo? Other food products? I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

Try olive oil feels so good

 

[SmokingFap]

Try olive oil feels so good

Wish I had some. Would rather try that than mayo, but desperate times, desperate measure and all that...

 

[Happyface42]

Yup. Don't feel like going back out to the store. Did a minimal amount of research, seems mayo is at least safe and possibly enjoyable, although definitely need a shower afterwards. I saw that coconut oil was highly recommended, as well as olive oil. Don't have those. Anyone else tried mayo? Other food products? I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck!

Sounds messy . I prefer to wank ' dry '

 

[hulmule]

Hellmann's have omega 3 also lmao . Whats their song - Bring out the Hellmanns and bring out the best ... lol

 

[Tony195756]

Hellmann's have omega 3 also lmao . Whats their song - Bring out the Hellmanns and bring out the best ... lolSounds like a great idea

 

[Happyface42]

Nope , not having it ! A dry wank is the best . One advantage of having a foreskin

 

[Tony195756]

Nope , not having it ! A dry wank is the best . One advantage of having a foreskin

Try it you might like it

 

[Happyface42]

Try it you might like it

Call me a twat but I can't help thinking about mayo stains . Spunk stains are bad enough

 

[womaneater58]

Olive oil would work nicely but I don't think I could stay excited with mayo. I'd rather be dry and go slow with pre-cum.

 

[SmokingFap]

Okay, so, mayo WORKS if you add enough spit to dilute it. But it's really messy and made me crave a sandwich. Overall, would not recommend using it to jerk off unless you're as desperate as I was, but did have a nice orgasm with it.

 

[Happyface42]

Okay, so, mayo WORKS if you add enough spit to dilute it. But it's really messy and made me crave a sandwich. Overall, would not recommend using it to jerk off unless you're as desperate as I was, but did have a nice orgasm with it.

You can keep it .

 

[Tony195756]

Call me a twat but I can't help thinking about mayo stains . Spunk stains are bad enough

True what ever feels better

Okay, so, mayo WORKS if you add enough spit to dilute it. But it's really messy and made me crave a sandwich. Overall, would not recommend using it to jerk off unless you're as desperate as I was, but did have a nice orgasm with it.

i will give it a try always willing to try something new

 

[Happyface42]

You can keep it .

Told you it would be messy !

 

[Tony195756]

Told you it would be messy !

Messy can be fun

 

[Happyface42]

Messy can be fun

Not when you're on your own .
A moment of joy and hours of scrubbing !

 

[Tony195756]

Not when you're on your own .
A moment of joy and hours of scrubbing !

So true

 

[Happyface42]

So true

And wouldn't mayo start to stink if not cleaned up properly ?

 

[Tony195756]

Yes but I was a supervisor for a cleaning so not a problem lol

 

[Happyface42]

Yes but I was a supervisor for a cleaning so not a problem lol

 

[Carnevil9]

No SOAP in your house? Pretty much any cleaning product for your skin or hair will make a decent lube.

 

[Happyface42]

No SOAP in your house? Pretty much any cleaning product for your skin or hair will make a decent lube.

If you say so .

 

[soflabbwlvr]

Next time, just break open a couple eggs and you can whip up your own batch of mayo

 

[Happyface42]

What a strange conversation