Going Down

[ian370]

First of all, a woman should not have to ask a man to go down on her. It should simply be offered. Because, nothing should be more important than making your partner feel good to the extreme. It is an offer without any direct pleasure involved and thus the focus is on the woman at hand. Or, underneath tongue, so to speak.

Second, the focus needs to be on the actual journey. Not only that final destination. This allows the woman to relax without having to feel rushed. Sex is best when not this way. Even when it happens to be quick.

Then, she can focus on feeling without having to think. That is when she can actually feel more free letting go. Which means she may be more bound to genuinely make us as the man feel good. Which means there is no excuse for not wanting to offer something like this. We end up getting ours as well. It just ends up being good for both.

Anyone who suggests this is 'not masculine' isn't even a real man. You can get her to the point in which all gets down and dirty. Not to mention fast as well. It just is so much better when it takes the time of getting there.

As for some tips to get her there. It is helpful when she is elevated and legs are spread wide open. Perhaps, around your shoulders or waist. Make sure she is comfortable herself while being completely open for your explorations. She may like to be teased a little first. Along the top of her inner thighs. Find where she is most sensitive.

Do not go for it all right away. Consider blowing right underneath the bulb of her clit. Or, hold the edge of your tongue right there. Let your partner know you need to feel her moving. Let this person know that her need will fuel your own. Making you even more frantic to feel her. Make her actually feel desired.

Do not forget to multi-task. Make sure to involve touching the edges of her skin with your fingers. Perhaps, with a scrap of silk tied on the end. Or you can even wrap it all the way around the crest of her clit. Make her feel the full extension before you then start that seductive soothing. Maybe, blindfold her so that she is more aware of contrasts and has to focus on feeling.

I would suggest holding on tighter even as she starts to let go. So as to both extend her pleasure and feel every single vivid vibration right along with her. There may be the instinct to pull away. This is where you may need to push down even more firmly.

All women are different. There is no right way to start or end. It is all about discovery. The point is to make her start to crave more. Uplifting with her movements so as to erase even the need for any words.

 

[Funnbrandy]

Going down

People can't help what they do and don't like.....but anyone that does not do oral (man or woman) has no place in my bedroom! Lol

 

[oneblueye]

hey ...

People can't help what they do and don't like.....but anyone that does not do oral (man or woman) has no place in my bedroom! Lol

I feel the same way!!!!
But the wife still don't want to leave.

 

[ian370]

People can't help what they do and don't like.....but anyone that does not do oral (man or woman) has no place in my bedroom! Lol

I am all about differences and variety. Not sure many other men would enjoy it quite the way I do. Just would think that a guy would want to at least offer something like this to a woman without needing to be asked.

 

[anniebaby10]

I married my husband because he went down on me before we did anything else and he was so damn good at it I had the best orgasm of my life. After I could talk again, I simply said " On a scale of one to ten that was an eleven. I have to marry you now you know? " And two years later we were. And he is still incredible at it and is our "opening act" almost every night.

 

[ian370]

I married my husband because he went down on me before we did anything else and he was so damn good at it I had the best orgasm of my life. After I could talk again, I simply said " On a scale of one to ten that was an eleven. I have to marry you now you know? " And two years later we were. And he is still incredible at it and is our "opening act" almost every night.

That is beautiful and sexy all rolled into one. Some of the best and most important things are maybe said without a single word at all.

I think that this act perhaps this goes beyond the merely sexual. Someone who wants to make it that good in bed likely is a giving person out of it. Not that it always has to be in bed, of course. Or even in the bedroom, for that matter.

Even when there is the decision for it to be quick, nothing should ever have to be rushed. There can be a fun contrast in between the very slow at first and then the much more frantic later on. It is awesome that you both seem to take the time appreciating the journey and not just a final destination.

 

[soflabbwlvr]

Don't assume everyone wants or enjoys the same thing -- not even something as good as oral. I knew two women who did not care for oral. One women could only cum once. I found this out the hard way one day when I licked her to orgasm despite her urging me to stop. She came hard, and then got up and dressed. She explained that after cumming once, she was too sensitive to do anything more. So when I ate her to completion, she was done.

Another lady I knew did not care oral, at all. She needed penetration. That's all she enjoyed, and all she wanted.

Both of these situations were learning experiences for me. I'm a guy who goes down and stays down until she can't take anymore. Not everyone wants or needs that kind of attention, unfortunately.

 

[anniebaby10]

Don't assume everyone wants or enjoys the same thing -- not even something as good as oral. I knew two women who did not care for oral. One women could only cum once. I found this out the hard way one day when I licked her to orgasm despite her urging me to stop. She came hard, and then got up and dressed. She explained that after cumming once, she was too sensitive to do anything more. So when I ate her to completion, she was done.

Another lady I knew did not care oral, at all. She needed penetration. That's all she enjoyed, and all she wanted.

Both of these situations were learning experiences for me. I'm a guy who goes down and stays down until she can't take anymore. Not everyone wants or needs that kind of attention, unfortunately.

True... but those ladies are in the minority. Almost all my gfs love to have their pussy eaten.

 

[Islander55]

Don't assume everyone wants or enjoys the same thing -- not even something as good as oral. I knew two women who did not care for oral. One women could only cum once. I found this out the hard way one day when I licked her to orgasm despite her urging me to stop. She came hard, and then got up and dressed. She explained that after cumming once, she was too sensitive to do anything more. So when I ate her to completion, she was done.

Another lady I knew did not care oral, at all. She needed penetration. That's all she enjoyed, and all she wanted.

Both of these situations were learning experiences for me. I'm a guy who goes down and stays down until she can't take anymore. Not everyone wants or needs that kind of attention, unfortunately.

I am with both of these ladies. I tend to be one and done. I can hold off and do a number of things but once I cum, I am sensitive and I want to rest. Now I do not mind oral if he knows what he is doing but I prefer penetration when I cum. I like to feel his body pressed to mine and I like to feel filled. I suspect I am in the minority but it is what it is.

 

[TandT69]

I guess we are what you call the true cunnilingus connoisseurs here. We both love it, we both cant live without it and it gets us off repeatedly like no other! I guess thats not a bad thing!!

 

[ian370]

Don't assume everyone wants or enjoys the same thing -- not even something as good as oral. I knew two women who did not care for oral. One women could only cum once. I found this out the hard way one day when I licked her to orgasm despite her urging me to stop. She came hard, and then got up and dressed. She explained that after cumming once, she was too sensitive to do anything more. So when I ate her to completion, she was done.

Another lady I knew did not care oral, at all. She needed penetration. That's all she enjoyed, and all she wanted.

Both of these situations were learning experiences for me. I'm a guy who goes down and stays down until she can't take anymore. Not everyone wants or needs that kind of attention, unfortunately.

I do appreciate your sentiments. It is not about all women wanting it or having to enjoy it or else, per-se. More about the man being open in offering it. I do know that some women do not like it at all. For whatever that personal reason may be.

Sensitivity can be an issue. Especially after that initial orgasm. That is why indirect teasing can prove to work really well. Especially around the outer edges of her clit. It tends to offer the possibility of arousal slowly starting to rebuild without there being too much.

 

[ian370]

True... but those ladies are in the minority. Almost all my gfs love to have their pussy eaten.

I have usually tended toward the minority. But, this time I may just happen to...agree with the majority.

 

[ian370]

I am with both of these ladies. I tend to be one and done. I can hold off and do a number of things but once I cum, I am sensitive and I want to rest. Now I do not mind oral if he knows what he is doing but I prefer penetration when I cum. I like to feel his body pressed to mine and I like to feel filled. I suspect I am in the minority but it is what it is.

I think that mutual enjoyment is the key. Not everything has to be a marathon. It just doesn't have to be a 60 meter sprint, either.

It honestly may not all even have to be all about the orgasm. Nor how many one has to have. Too much thought holds up the best of sex sometimes. Like when a woman may feel rushed having to orgasm so as of still having that chance. This is why the man should perhaps be open to hold off just a little longer. While focusing the pleasure outside of the self.

When you think about it, being able to let go of that thinking is when the feelings may actually be the best.

Actually, I think a lot of women may prefer to be filled in the end. That is the contrast in between slow and then fast. Gentle and firm.

 

[ian370]

I guess we are what you call the true cunnilingus connoisseurs here. We both love it, we both cant live without it and it gets us off repeatedly like no other! I guess thats not a bad thing!!

I can no doubt have an intense orgasm just from giving if knowing that my partner is truly enjoying herself toward the extreme.

 

[gtnlynn]

Thanks for the post. It brings back memories of the first time I went down on my wife. She had sex with several different guys in college and for the first time with me on our wedding night. We got a book that had a section on oral sex, and she wasn't real sure she wanted to do it. Finally, after a lot of teasing, blowing and kissing all around the magic spot, she understood that I liked being down there and it felt good. So when I first went down on her with my mouth, she absolutely loved it and had the best orgasm of her life. Obviously, it has been a key part of our love-making ever since.

 

[Islander55]

I think that mutual enjoyment is the key. Not everything has to be a marathon. It just doesn't have to be a 60 meter sprint, either.

It honestly may not all even have to be all about the orgasm. Nor how many one has to have. Too much thought holds up the best of sex sometimes. Like when a woman may feel rushed having to orgasm so as of still having that chance. This is why the man should perhaps be open to hold off just a little longer. While focusing the pleasure outside of the self.

When you think about it, being able to let go of that thinking is when the feelings may actually be the best.

Actually, I think a lot of women may prefer to be filled in the end. That is the contrast in between slow and then fast. Gentle and firm.

You make several good points. It is not all about an orgasm. I can thoroughly enjoy sex without having an orgasm. Not that I do not usually try for it but it is not necessary. Also I think my most intense orgasms are when I simple let go. Don't think about it and just let it happen. I also love for the guy to let go as well. Not a wham. bam but there is a point when I know he is going to go and I am going to go. Love the feeling when I know I am going to take it and just enjoy it.

 

[ian370]

Thanks for the post. It brings back memories of the first time I went down on my wife. She had sex with several different guys in college and for the first time with me on our wedding night. We got a book that had a section on oral sex, and she wasn't real sure she wanted to do it. Finally, after a lot of teasing, blowing and kissing all around the magic spot, she understood that I liked being down there and it felt good. So when I first went down on her with my mouth, she absolutely loved it and had the best orgasm of her life. Obviously, it has been a key part of our love-making ever since.

Thanks for taking the time to read and respond. I think that it can be an acquired taste for some women. Others never come around to enjoying it at all. Which is also more than okay.

Some of the reasons a woman may not like it might have nothing at all to do with us as a man. Nor what we may happen to offer. It's just that variety allows for the chance of opportunity.

I think if a woman knows we are down there out of nothing other than that desire to please, it may allow for the most opportunity of all.

 

[ian370]

You make several good points. It is not all about an orgasm. I can thoroughly enjoy sex without having an orgasm. Not that I do not usually try for it but it is not necessary. Also I think my most intense orgasms are when I simple let go. Don't think about it and just let it happen. I also love for the guy to let go as well. Not a wham. bam but there is a point when I know he is going to go and I am going to go. Love the feeling when I know I am going to take it and just enjoy it.

It's sad that so many worry that it truly is all about that orgasm and a need of getting there right away. Thought this is perhaps how we are trained to think. I think you have to like reprogram yourself in some ways. Like, I used to be a 'minuteman' myself sadly enough. I had to retrain myself in taking the experience outside of me to make it better for the both of us.

It can be a challenge being a thinker and then allowing the mind to simply disappear. I just have found that this allows for the feelings to be even more intense because then the pleasure can come naturally. It can then basically lead to mind-blowing orgasms for both partners in the end. Not much good can ever come from what is forced.

 

[Rockwell12]

My wife is unfortunately in the minority in that she doesn't seem to care for oral sex. Id like to do it more often but have not pressed it. I've tried to have her tell me what her objection is but she is rather vague. I think she feels pressured to orgasm ans when it doesn't happen she might feel that she's disappointing me. She is also very pragmatic about sex. Why spend time on foreplay and build up when you can just get out the hitachi and orgasm 6-10 times within a few minutes. I certainly have never put pressure on her to orgasm through oral sex. I'd just like to have it in the rotation once in a while as foreplay.

 

[ian370]

My wife is unfortunately in the minority in that she doesn't seem to care for oral sex. Id like to do it more often but have not pressed it. I've tried to have her tell me what her objection is but she is rather vague. I think she feels pressured to orgasm ans when it doesn't happen she might feel that she's disappointing me. She is also very pragmatic about sex. Why spend time on foreplay and build up when you can just get out the hitachi and orgasm 6-10 times within a few minutes. I certainly have never put pressure on her to orgasm through oral sex. I'd just like to have it in the rotation once in a while as foreplay.

Honestly, this makes me rather sad. Kudos to you for not pressing anything and being so concerned about her enjoyment. I do think that your own enjoyment of doing it should definitely mean something. Though, I can see her side of not wanting to disappoint you.

Being pragmatic is not a bad thing. There is only a limited amount of time within the day. Then again, variety can be fun as well. So, I can see what you mean about wanting it to 'be in the rotation'.

The ultimate goal perhaps should always be mutual enjoyment to the extreme besides all else. I've never been threatened by anything which might lead to this happening. I know that her pleasure does not have to come in one specific way.

Just a thought. Any chance you may be able to incorporate the magic wand into your own oral pleasing? That way, you can maybe have the best of both worlds.

 

[ian370]

Some other thoughts. Thinking can be a good thing.

First, if someone gives oral to another and then the receiver is not open to kissing afterward, should that perhaps be a deal-breaker?

Second, if someone is not willing to offer of being giving in bed, does that suggest he or she may be an abuser? Like, would it set off a red flag to you?

Kissing to me is incredibly intimate. Why should one not want to kiss someone who has provided intense pleasure? Not sure it should have to be even asked for.

I do think someone not offering to give much and being just into his or her own pleasure could at the very least be selfish. This might extend outside of bed.

The best of enjoyment is meant to be mutual. Not sure if this can happen when the focus is only one one person. If you are only in it for yourself, why even need to involve another?

 

[windwater]

Love in the el-a-va-tor - Livin' up while I'm go-oing doooooown!

 

[ian370]

Love in the el-a-va-tor - Livin' up while I'm go-oing doooooown!

Long live Aerosmith.

 

[oneblueye]

hey ...

Some other thoughts. Thinking can be a good thing.

First, if someone gives oral to another and then the receiver is not open to kissing afterward, should that perhaps be a deal-breaker?

Second, if someone is not willing to offer of being giving in bed, does that suggest he or she may be an abuser? Like, would it set off a red flag to you?

Kissing to me is incredibly intimate. Why should one not want to kiss someone who has provided intense pleasure? Not sure it should have to be even asked for.

I do think someone not offering to give much and being just into his or her own pleasure could at the very least be selfish. This might extend outside of bed.

The best of enjoyment is meant to be mutual. Not sure if this can happen when the focus is only one one person. If you are only in it for yourself, why even need to involve another?

the answer to your very last question is answered by your thoughts about someone being that into their own pleasure ...for them to be selfish in sex like that is because they are sexually lazy.

 

[ian370]

the answer to your very last question is answered by your thoughts about someone being that into their own pleasure ...for them to be selfish in sex like that is because they are sexually lazy.

Laziness has no place in sex. Not within the shared kind, at least.