First time review request

[tigglywits]

Hello everyone, I haven't posted on here before, I'd like some thoughts about the little series I post every now and then. It's supposed to be pretty lighthearted, and hopefully amusing. None of the chapters are very long, as personally I prefer reading shorter stories and chapters.

Miranda's Magic Mouth
Chapter 1
https://www.literotica.com/s/mirandas-magic-mouth

Chapter 6
https://www.literotica.com/s/mirandas-magic-mouth-ch-06

 

[LWulf]

chapter 1 review

I like the delivery. You have a knack for story telling that draws from various concepts, yet weaves them together expertly. Flow seemed quite smooth. Therefore, again, I like the delivery. Oral sex isn't really my bag, and the title telescopes your intent, but a well worded story rates to me.

Yup, definitely short, which is also not my bag. I have no desire to keep reading a (very) short story (regardless that there are more 3/4 page chapters).

The actual oral sex was rather uninspiring, but that's probably because it's not my bag.
Mostly because I'm not looking for a quick fix (which also describes my lacking interest in short stories). Oral sex, to me, is a bottle rocket. It's over before it began, which pretty much gets summed up by Miranda's "seven stroke trick."

The dialogue was well spaced and seemed realistic.

I saw the ending before it came, which either means you foreshadowed it, or something similar. I'm kind of curious to see if it pans out as I expect it will or if you'll bring in some interesting plot twists.

Generally light-hearted as promised and delivered. I smiled a couple times reading it. Relatively speaking, the parts without the sex read better, and felt like the saucy bits were shoehorned in.

 

[ElectricBlue]

A fun little story. Nice .

 

[tigglywits]

I like the delivery. You have a knack for story telling that draws from various concepts, yet weaves them together expertly. Flow seemed quite smooth. Therefore, again, I like the delivery. Oral sex isn't really my bag, and the title telescopes your intent, but a well worded story rates to me.

Yup, definitely short, which is also not my bag. I have no desire to keep reading a (very) short story (regardless that there are more 3/4 page chapters).

The actual oral sex was rather uninspiring, but that's probably because it's not my bag.
Mostly because I'm not looking for a quick fix (which also describes my lacking interest in short stories). Oral sex, to me, is a bottle rocket. It's over before it began, which pretty much gets summed up by Miranda's "seven stroke trick."

The dialogue was well spaced and seemed realistic.

I saw the ending before it came, which either means you foreshadowed it, or something similar. I'm kind of curious to see if it pans out as I expect it will or if you'll bring in some interesting plot twists.

Generally light-hearted as promised and delivered. I smiled a couple times reading it. Relatively speaking, the parts without the sex read better, and felt like the saucy bits were shoehorned in.

Thank you very much for your very insightful reply!

 

[ef_oh_ex]

Hello everyone, I haven't posted on here before, I'd like some thoughts about the little series I post every now and then. It's supposed to be pretty lighthearted, and hopefully amusing. None of the chapters are very long, as personally I prefer reading shorter stories and chapters.

Miranda's Magic Mouth
Chapter 1
https://www.literotica.com/s/mirandas-magic-mouth

Chapter 6
https://www.literotica.com/s/mirandas-magic-mouth-ch-06

You said that you were aiming for amusing and light and I think that you nailed it. I checked out Ch. 1 and found it entertaining; liking the back story, the college dorm setting, dialogue, length, etc. It's true that the alliterative title telegraphs the story-line but that trade-off works in my estimation.

 

[Wilson Spalding]

Left this at the story, too:

I usually don't wander into SF & Fantasy...
But this story made me really glad I did. It was a really fun read and Miranda (or the voice that paints her) is absolutely adorable. Love it!

***

I'll add this here: I'm still not likely to wander into SF&F here on Literotica, but I'm very likely to finish your series. Miranda is awesome.