The Isolated Blurt Thread XXXI : Don't Be a Fuckhead

[Stewart_Pidd]

Pookie had her nips removed bro.

Stew

 

[HarryHill]

..
ouch

 

[Pookie]

Why did Laurel blur Pookie's nip?

She's jealous because I have more nips than she does. *nods*

 

[Pookie]

Pookie had her nips removed bro.

Stew

Just some of them, cuz bro.

 

[butters]

It’s a good day to have a good day.

yes, yes it is

 

[butters]

taco breakfast ftw

 

[adrina]

I had chicken ceasar salad.

 

[butters]

I had chicken ceasar salad.

damn this pandemic, making us broaden our dietary habits!

 

[Adre]

Asian chicken salad for lunch.

 

[silver gurl]

Local summer joint opens today. So, it will be take out.

 

[adrina]

damn this pandemic, making us broaden our dietary habits!

Variety is the spice of life.

I've always been partial to more savory fare in the morning anyway. I have a sweet tooth, but it's not directed much toward breakfast.

 

[Saint Peter]

Soggy AF!

I was pulling a few weeds and uncovered a frog (toad?) hiding in the green.

Ruby thought about it for a second but decided against eating the unlucky fucker.

 

[thør]

I think the frogs have thawed out around here. Likely still frozen under the snow at the cabin.

Damn, this coffee is good.

 

[thør]

Exterior work on hold for another day. I’m sure the ducks in the brook are happy.

Dude, just saying....

 

[phantom4533]

Local summer joint opens today. So, it will be take out.

How are their fried clams?

 

[Saint Peter]

I think the frogs have thawed out around here. Likely still frozen under the snow at the cabin.

Damn, this coffee is good.

She likes frozen green beans.

Hmmmm.

 

[thør]

She likes frozen green beans.

Hmmmm.

I'd bet the snow is only 2' deep up there, now. Things are thawing out.

 

[Saint Peter]

I'd bet the snow is only 2' deep up there, now. Things are thawing out.

I got two cigar ashtrays full of rain yesterday.

The Corn is happy.

 

[Saint Peter]

Reluctance, is somewhat analogous to electrical resistance. It is the quantity that determines the magnetic flux, ø, resulting from a given magneto motive force, F.

Where: R=F/ø
R=reluctance, in gilberts per maxwell
F=magneto motive force, I gilberts
Ø=flux, in maxwells.

Well, sometimes.

 

[Sean]

Missing Wife

Husband:

My wife is missing.

She went out yesterday and has not come home.


Sergeant at Police Station:

What is her height?


Husband:

Sorry, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall, maybe.


Sergeant:

Weight?


Husband:

Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.


Sergeant:

Colour of eyes?


Husband:

Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.


Sergeant:

Colour of hair?


Husband:

Changes a couple times a year.

Maybe dark brown now.

I can’t remember.


Sergeant:

What was she wearing?


Husband:

Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.


Sergeant:

What kind of car did she go in?


Husband:

She went in my Porsche


Sergeant:

What kind of Porsche was it?


Husband: (sobbing)

Porsche 991.2 Carrera C4S 7 speed PDK

Ambient Lighting pack - Creats headrests. heated seats, Valcona leather - Lunar silver + super sport seats, 3 spoke heated sports leather multifunction steering wheel with paddle shift, LED Matrix headlights with high beam assist, Pearlescent paint, parking system plus with front and rear sensors, Audible and visual fasten seat belt warning - front and rear, Cruise control, Driver's information system, PCM Navigation, Mobile telephone preparation, PAS, Service interval indicator, 3 point seatbelts on all seats, ABS-EBD, ASR traction control, Curtain airbags, Driver and passenger airbags, Driver-front passenger side airbags, Electromechanical parking brake, Electronic stability control, Front passenger airbag deactivation, Hill hold assist, Tyre pressure monitoring system, Warning triangle and first aid kit, Anti theft alarm, Anti-theft wheel bolts, Immobiliser, Keyless Start, Remote central locking, Audi music interface, Auxiliary input socket, DAB digital radio module, CD player and bluetooth interface, SD card slot, USB connection, 12V power in rear centre console, 4 way electric lumbar support, 4 zone climate control, Aluminium door sill trims, Black alcantara headlining, Electric front seats + driver memory, Front centre armrest, Front head restraints, Front-rear floor mats, Height adjustable front seats, Isofix front passenger and rear seat preparation, Jack and tool kit, Load lashing points, Luggage compartment cover, Luggage rails, Perforated leather gearknob, Split folding rear seat, Auto dimming rear view mirror, Automatic headlights + automatic windscreen wipers, Body coloured bumpers, Body coloured door mirrors and handles, Body coloured roof spoiler, Door sill trims with Black badges. Electric front-rear windows, Headlight washers, High gloss black door mirrors, High gloss black finish B pillar, High gloss black triangular aperture at rear door, LED daytime running lights, LED rear lights, Light sensor, Platinum grey front lip spoiler, Privacy glass (to rear of B post), Rain sensor, Rear wiper, Alcantara door trim, Piano black finish inlay, Space saver spare wheel, Black Styling pack - Non smoking pack - Rain sensing wipers, gloss black alloys, PCCB, glass roof, colour coded xenon washer jets, red seat belts.


Sergeant:

Don't worry mate we’ll find it.

 

[Saint Peter]

"send picture of boat"

 

[Saint Peter]

"It's like being in a swimming pool and having one area of the pool that it’s OK to pee in," he said.

open
it
up

 

[Saint Peter]

airbrushed nipples

 

[Saint Peter]

And now it is time to vacuum, and not fun vacuum like sucking the atmosphere out of a vessel. No.

Sucking cat hair out of the carpet.



God Speed.

 

[bestone4ever]

The wife got up early and made chicken and massive amounts of cheese enchiladas.

https://i.imgur.com/ECKHTEb.jpg?1

it's just the two of us.