Workplace Fling

[fac401]

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

 

[JohnnyPump1970]

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

I like to have a conversation that at some point includes the following question. "Hey babe, wanna bone?"

 

[fac401]

Haha, exactly. How do we get to that stage?

 

[jchuli]

Keep it away from work

In this world of Tinder and Bumble and online apps besides all the local bars, why does one need to mess at work? Gone are the days when meeting someone was tough as we spent 8-10 hours at work. Now a host of hot partners is available at the swipe of the finger. Workplace hookups can get real messy.

 

[Heartsongs]

Good luck

...why does one need to mess at work? ... Workplace hookups can get real messy.

I just saw and individual get terminated for sexual harassment for flirting with a secretary where I work. It only happened once, according to the secretary. You better know the person's response before you try anything, or deal with the possible consequences. If you really need to pursue someone at work, then good luck

 

[Lost_Yonder]

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

Tricky situation and depends so much on the situation - big or small company, lots of interaction between colleagues or not, who is more senior, and, most importantly, what is company policy! You might want to check that first. Unless you are in completely different departments with no overlap, then it might work - but then how would you know she even exists? Which means she is someone you work closely with, or see regularly. Even if both of you are open to a relationship, if/when it sours, it will be unpleasant.

If you are determined to push ahead and explore the possibilities, first and foremost, don't ever expect anything to come of it. Just play and see where it goes, if anywhere. Spend more time with her, have lunch with her, make if friendship based. Get to know her, have her get to know you. Make sure the interest is reciprocated and it isn't just you constantly hanging out in her office, asking her to sit with you over lunch, etc. That can be creepy.

 

[fac401]

Tricky situation and depends so much on the situation - big or small company, lots of interaction between colleagues or not, who is more senior, and, most importantly, what is company policy! You might want to check that first. Unless you are in completely different departments with no overlap, then it might work - but then how would you know she even exists? Which means she is someone you work closely with, or see regularly. Even if both of you are open to a relationship, if/when it sours, it will be unpleasant.

If you are determined to push ahead and explore the possibilities, first and foremost, don't ever expect anything to come of it. Just play and see where it goes, if anywhere. Spend more time with her, have lunch with her, make if friendship based. Get to know her, have her get to know you. Make sure the interest is reciprocated and it isn't just you constantly hanging out in her office, asking her to sit with you over lunch, etc. That can be creepy.

That’s very good advice.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

This sort of question (and the realistic answers generated) strikes me as the basis for a very good practical joke - not for the OP of course, just in general.

Every HR department generates forms, much like damp walls generate mildew. Make one of your own, based on the format of existing ones, the 'Respectful Request for a Date' form (surely there has to be a better name, but you can see where this is going). Blanks for:

• Names
• Address and contact info, including daytime, nighttime and cell numbers
• Social media accounts
• Date and location of birth
• Gender self-identification
• Visible minority self-identification
• Marital status
• Allergies and dietary requirements
• 'Have you in the past five (5) years been subject to a peace bond, protection order, etc?'
• Political party membership
• Signature of applicant
• Signature of approval from applicant's boss and countersignature from a plausible but nonexistent HR position.
• Reason for wanting a date (giving maybe ¾" of space in which to respond).
• Proposed date activity, including event, location, time, etc

Required annexes to include photo, health check, police check, credit check, recommendations from previous girl/boyfriends, etc.​

Lard it up, send out copies anonymously to all departments and watch HR squirm.

I did that, long long ago and far far away - a form required to be completed anytime unit members were planning any kind of social activity, on or off-duty, even two guys going for an after-hour beer on Friday after work. Four pages of gibberish quietly sent out to everybody as if it was a new policy. Some complained, but some thought it was no weirder than other policies popping up at the time. The G1 went postal...

I still smile at the memory.

 

[jaF0]

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

"McDonald's CEO Steve Easterbrook Fired Over Consensual ...

Nov 4, 2019Topline: McDonald's CEO Steve Easterbrook—credited with turning around the fast food giant—has been fired after he broke company rules by having a consensual relationship with an employee."

 

[Sweet_Cupcake]

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

Most important things to get straight first:

1. Is there a boss-subordinate relationship between the parties? Because if you are her boss, then it gets difficult immediately. If you are peers, way easier.

2. Does your employer have a policy on personal relationships among employees? In some cases, it is only an issue between boss-subordinates; sometimes there is no policy at all.

3. I get hit on at work all the time and I think the senior level men who do it are putting a lot at risk these days. I have always handled it with "thanks but no thanks" and have never been unpleasantly harassed, but you can never know exactly what will make a given person feel unpleasantly harassed. I have some female colleagues say that if a man even tells them they look nice, they think that is unacceptable.

Good luck to you.

 

[RunningJib]

Go to

Haha, exactly. How do we get to that stage?

Invite your friend out for coffee or lunch.

Word to the wise, most people are challenged with simple math. They will notice the two of you together and assume that you're boning her.

Secondly, if you do get beyond first base with your friend, someone will figure you out.

My advice? Not someone you work with.

 

[Conager]

The first step requires laying some groundwork. You need to know what your next job is going to be. Also if your employer offers a prepaid legal plan sign up for it, but find out whether or not workplace incidents are covered by the plan.

 

[seeshelly]

It worked for me

In this day and age with the heightened sensitivity to things such as #metoo (and rightfully so), how does one proceed with any sort of workplace encounters? Obviously I’m talking about two consenting individuals, but how can I approach someone whom I believe is open to such activities?

Any advice will be helpful.

I stayed late in the office on a night when I knew he would be working late.

He had been flirting with me for well over a year. I decided to let nature take its course. After the last person left the office he zoomed my desk to visit about something and I had my top two buttons open.

He flirted - I flirted back. We have been fucking ever since.

 

[Scareltt]

Sounds interesting...

I stayed late in the office on a night when I knew he would be working late.

He had been flirting with me for well over a year. I decided to let nature take its course. After the last person left the office he zoomed my desk to visit about something and I had my top two buttons open.

He flirted - I flirted back. We have been fucking ever since.

I’m sure it makes going to work that much more exciting.

 

[JenniferSimms]

I had sex with one of our interns last summer. I saw him at happy hour and one thing led to another, but we never had sex in the office.

 

[fac401]

The responses I’m seeing here outline exactly why I have always followed the adage “don’t dip your pen in the company ink”. There are so many risks associated with it that it almost seems like it’s not worth facing those risks. Almost

Aside from losing my employment because of a consensual relationship that gets twisted into “he sexually harassed me” situation, I also stress what would happen after the fact. Like people have mentioned, there will be rumors, it’s impossible to keep the secret without raising suspicions. But also, what about seeing that person at work everyday after it’s over (assuming the fucking won’t go on forever)

Like I said, risks.... do the benefits outweigh them?

 

[amofiga]

There is an old saying that you shouldn't shit where you eat. Screwing around at work, even between consensual adults, can be risky in this day and age of sexual harassment and #MeToo. What starts out as consensual could turn sour if one or the other partner decides they are being used or screwed over. I've heard of cases of women who have perhaps had too much to drink and had sex with someone, suddenly decide the next morning that they were "raped".

If the people involved are also married to others, then things can have an additional complication. I've seen people at my place of work end up divorced when someone spilled the beans.

 

[Erlikkhan]

There is an old saying that you shouldn't shit where you eat.

The expression is actually, "Don't shit in your mess kit." At least it was when I was in the Army.

Four golden rules for fucking a colleague from work.

1. No one in the direct line of command (boss/sub no matter who initiates it).
2. Never have sex in the place of work (business trip okay sometimes).
3. Never tell anyone at work who you're boffing (or who's boffing you).
4. Keep your distance from each other at work.

 

[MadameSarcasm]

My advice: Don't. Awkward when it ends, and super awkward when you get divorced and still have to work together in the same room!

 

[riverj]

My advice: Don't. Awkward when it ends, and super awkward when you get divorced and still have to work together in the same room!

Agreed......

 

[TD89129]

That’s how it worked for me too

I stayed late in the office on a night when I knew he would be working late.

He had been flirting with me for well over a year. I decided to let nature take its course. After the last person left the office he zoomed my desk to visit about something and I had my top two buttons open.

He flirted - I flirted back. We have been fucking ever since.

Same here.

Keep in mind, you need to know going in that the coworker you’re boning won’t throw you under the bus later. For us, it was a fun, no strings attached thrill.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Rule 12 - Never get involved with a co-worker.

 

[cuck72]

I just saw and individual get terminated for sexual harassment for flirting with a secretary where I work. It only happened once, according to the secretary. You better know the person's response before you try anything, or deal with the possible consequences. If you really need to pursue someone at work, then good luck

I would think it's just common sense. Get to know the hot girl, becoming friends first. Then if there's anything there, you will both get more brave with your friendship. You have to really like each other first, make sure you can both joke around with sexual comments. Then just tell her you been thinking about her.