Literotica Chat - Need to vent

[StrongMaster7]

I enjoy Lit chat. I've met some very nice women who have been kind enough to share their awesome sexuality with me . I've been chatting here for years and for years more elsewhere before that. Thank you to all the women of Literotica for being here.

It is my opinion that Lit users are 90+% male. I understand that being one of the few women on Lit makes you subject to a lot of unsolicited contact. Every time you log on you get bombarded with a bunch of unwanted PMs. You understand that many, if not most of the men here just want a woman to type a few erotic things to them to help them jerk off and you may not always be up for that. Fair enough.

I read Lit chat profiles. I want to make sure the screenname I'm addressing at least claims to be female. And the things some of the 'ladies' are demanding of the men who wish to chat with them are very entertaining.

"Don't just say 'hi'. Offer me a fully-detailed, elaborate RP scenario that's related to me and my interests, even though you don't know me or what my interests are."

"Don't just send me a blatant sexual message. I'm a person! How about 'hello'? "

"You will need to get to know all about me as a person, not just relate to me as a sexual being."

"Leave my family, my location, my job, and my past out of this!"

"If you don't have a profile, I hate you. If you ask me my interests, I hate you. If you ask me about my body, I hate you. If you use any words I find objectionable, I hate you."

Hey, I'm sorry movie stars don't get the privacy they want, but it's part of the deal. Same thing for women on Lit.

I'm sorry some men are jerks. I'm sorry some men use poor grammar or can't put together a sentence. But in exchange, you get to pick from the hoards of men. You get to flake out on them and go to the next one whenever you like. You can make the men do 99% of the communicating. You can multi-chat a dozen men at once. You don't have to be interesting, exciting, or bring anything at all to the table.

The deal men get is this. Spend hours trying to find a woman who will respond at all.
Try to mind-read what they want out of the chat. Hope you get a woman who wants to chat about sex and can do it in real time. Ignore the static you get from the women who are offended that you did not follow their 'rules'.

Of course poor behavior is not limited to women. Some men are pigs. But the law of supply and demand is absolute. And women have the supply. They are entitled to be as picky and choosy and rude as they can get away with. Just understand that rudeness begets more rudeness.

Play nicely, people.

End of rant.

 

[Misshotndeep]

So your bitching it’s to much like real life?
Or is it you need to put forth effort and pussy is not just dropped in your lap?
Not to be rude but Lit is what it is. It’s organic and ever changing. Since women can pick and choose they are able to ask for the best. Put out there or stfu. Us gals are not settling.
As for being pissy, well some of us have shitty lives. It would affect anyone’s mood. Don’t hate cuz your living the dream. I mean you must not be if your here. Everyone here is lacking something in their life. It’s why we come.

 

[StrongMaster7]

Thank you for the response. A lot of truth and wisdom there.

 

[itwasntme2]

I didn't realise how the skew of male to female ratio affected men in here. your post is an eye opener. I often go into the chat rooms and say very little. For most occasions no one sends a pm. If they do, i check their profile or comments they have left in the chat rooms to see if there would be some compatibility. Usually though i will reply to a pm with a polite sentence or 2 even if it is someone whose interests wouldn't gel with mine.. But usually ending the conversation if it is someone im not interested in with those 2 sentence responses.
I am wondering if you think women are bombarded with pm's in general. My experience is no. Then i dont usually advertise im a woman by either my profile name or by what i would say in general discussions in the chat rooms. I think those women who do get bombarded have a female sounding name or state they are women. Given the ratio, i can see from your post why they would get bombarded with messages.
i dont know if anyone will get too offended by what anyone says on here. Its an adult chat room and often its sexualised. To take offense at what someone says because of our gender or the gender of whom is stating it, that seems unrealistic to me. Then again i have interacted with so few on here maybe there is merit to what you say.
i like the insight you have given into some/ many of the males and women on here. Its something to think about.

 

[StrongMaster7]

I appreciate the opinions and thoughts of others.

As an old man, I think I'm just lamenting the passing of 'the good old days' when it seemed to me that people were a little friendlier, a little kinder, a little more open.

And it is silly for me to complain about a free website rather than just go find another. Silly me.

 

[littlecordelera]

I've been participating in these forums off and on for almost 10 years (I think). I've received hundreds of PM's from guys, but the number of those that have been rude or inappropriate I could count on one hand. That means that 99% of the guys who have contacted me have been sincere and considerate. I know that most of them are looking for a source of arousal, but this is a sex website. If they are not looking for arousal, then what's the point in being here?

I respond to all messages, unless they are rude, and as I said above, that almost never happens. Sometimes I am blunt and maybe a little too honest, but that's my personality. Some guys can deal with it and some cannot, but it has nothing to do with them. It does, however, help to filter out those who would probably not mix well with me anyway, so maybe it's for the best. Either way, I've seen a lot of posts about rude guys and PM's. That has not been my experience.

 

[Vitriolhack]

My 2cents.

In general and in life it is really hard to find compatibility. This is a literary site, so, naturally the assumption is that it caters primarily to readers and writers.

I guess that most of us are here because we want a distraction from every day life. Just like reading a good book.

I read a few comments on this thread that seem to indicate that people come here because they are not satisfied with their life. Maybe some do, but I would rather think that people are here because they have active imaginations that stories help assuage away from their everyday vicissitudes.

I have had great on going conversations with men and women here. Granted men are more plentiful here, especially on the chat rooms. My experience is that it is just as difficult to find good conversations with men and women or anyone in between.

I always assume that the person on the other side of the keyboard is a nice well balanced person until they give me an a reason for me not to think so. Some have kinks (nothing illegal), and that is no reason to judge anyone for. This site may be the only way for them to find respite of an otherwise difficult situation they have or may have developed.

 

[KatieDoes]

I enjoy Lit chat. I've met some very nice women who have been kind enough to share their awesome sexuality with me . I've been chatting here for years and for years more elsewhere before that. Thank you to all the women of Literotica for being here.

It is my opinion that Lit users are 90+% male. I understand that being one of the few women on Lit makes you subject to a lot of unsolicited contact. Every time you log on you get bombarded with a bunch of unwanted PMs. You understand that many, if not most of the men here just want a woman to type a few erotic things to them to help them jerk off and you may not always be up for that. Fair enough.

I read Lit chat profiles. I want to make sure the screenname I'm addressing at least claims to be female. And the things some of the 'ladies' are demanding of the men who wish to chat with them are very entertaining.

"Don't just say 'hi'. Offer me a fully-detailed, elaborate RP scenario that's related to me and my interests, even though you don't know me or what my interests are."

"Don't just send me a blatant sexual message. I'm a person! How about 'hello'? "

"You will need to get to know all about me as a person, not just relate to me as a sexual being."

"Leave my family, my location, my job, and my past out of this!"

"If you don't have a profile, I hate you. If you ask me my interests, I hate you. If you ask me about my body, I hate you. If you use any words I find objectionable, I hate you."

Hey, I'm sorry movie stars don't get the privacy they want, but it's part of the deal. Same thing for women on Lit.

I'm sorry some men are jerks. I'm sorry some men use poor grammar or can't put together a sentence. But in exchange, you get to pick from the hoards of men. You get to flake out on them and go to the next one whenever you like. You can make the men do 99% of the communicating. You can multi-chat a dozen men at once. You don't have to be interesting, exciting, or bring anything at all to the table.

The deal men get is this. Spend hours trying to find a woman who will respond at all.
Try to mind-read what they want out of the chat. Hope you get a woman who wants to chat about sex and can do it in real time. Ignore the static you get from the women who are offended that you did not follow their 'rules'.

Of course poor behavior is not limited to women. Some men are pigs. But the law of supply and demand is absolute. And women have the supply. They are entitled to be as picky and choosy and rude as they can get away with. Just understand that rudeness begets more rudeness.

Play nicely, people.

End of rant.

Having the choice of lots of men looking for any random wet hole to stick their dick into isn’t exactly the wonderful prize you seem to think it is.


I can only speak for myself, but being used as a nameless faceless vessel to help strangers on the internet jerk off does absolutely nothing for me. There are plenty of porn sites, free and paid, where men can find women that are willing to help with that. If you’re not willing to invest effort in forming a connection, just invest money in sex workers.

You said that women don’t have to be interesting, exciting, or bring anything to the table. I think thats where there might be a disconnect. I *am* interesting, exciting, and bring a lot to the table. I have zero interest in men (or women) that don’t care about that. It doesn’t turn me on to play around with people that don’t know or care about who I am.

I don’t need someone I play with to be my one and only lifelong connection, but there has to be a connection. Even if all we ever share is casual physical fun, if there’s zero real connection, I’m not going to get off on it. So why on earth would I waste time with someone that I don’t even know if I like? If someone can’t carry their half of the conversation and participate in an equitable give and take about a non sexual topic, i can guarantee they aren’t going to suddenly be able to say the things that are going to help me cum.

There are a LOT of women here that don’t post. They don’t participate openly because of how they are treated when they do. Most women don’t want to fuck around sexually with a man that doesn’t like women as people