Fetlife.

chame1eon

Human
Joined
Dec 20, 2005
Posts
8,047
Wasnt sure where to post this question. But im wondering what the deal with fetlife is exactly. What is your experience there.
 
I joined but aside from looking at some profiles and seeing no one of interest, I've done nothing else. I found the site to be very clunky and not easy to navigate.
 
I've been member for a while. As Jada said, aside from looking at profiles I’ve done little else with it. I know a few people in my area that use it to find like-minded individuals’ fetish wise. The search function is clunky, but once you get used to it, it serves its purpose.
 
I was on FetLife for awhile, I definitely think it's a good tool to find local kinksters in your area. But it is somewhat hard to navigate, but once you figure it out it's not bad
 
I disagree with the notion that Fetlife is clunky and difficult to navigate. Once you learn what you're doing it's as simple as any other similar site. Much easier than Facebook in my opinion.

I've been on Fetlife for nearly ten years. I like it because it's a pictorial site but also has forum pages similar to Literotica. Once you get to know what you want, you can search for the sort of thing you may be interested in such as spanking, oral, anal, cuckold, threesomes, whatever and you will find several forums that are similar to those here on Literotica. You can send and receive personal messages just as here on Lit and I've connected with some compatible people online.... none in person.

The basic site is free. If you're willing to pony up $5 per month, you get unlimited access to amateur videos that people post. Many are garbage and overly amateurish, some are ok.

My only complaint about Fetlife is that some of the pictorial BDSM goes beyond my personal comfort zone, but everybody has their own limits. I simply chose not to dwell on those profile sites and pics that don't appeal to me. Simple. On the other hand, there are also those there that are not into BDSM but enjoy other interests from group sex to hotwifing to cuckolding and on and on. In my opinion, both Fetlife and Literotica have their pluses and minuses, but I enjoy both for separate reasons.
 
I disagree with the notion that Fetlife is clunky and difficult to navigate. Once you learn what you're doing it's as simple as any other similar site. Much easier than Facebook in my opinion.

I've been on Fetlife for nearly ten years. I like it because it's a pictorial site but also has forum pages similar to Literotica. Once you get to know what you want, you can search for the sort of thing you may be interested in such as spanking, oral, anal, cuckold, threesomes, whatever and you will find several forums that are similar to those here on Literotica. You can send and receive personal messages just as here on Lit and I've connected with some compatible people online.... none in person.

The basic site is free. If you're willing to pony up $5 per month, you get unlimited access to amateur videos that people post. Many are garbage and overly amateurish, some are ok.

My only complaint about Fetlife is that some of the pictorial BDSM goes beyond my personal comfort zone, but everybody has their own limits. I simply chose not to dwell on those profile sites and pics that don't appeal to me. Simple. On the other hand, there are also those there that are not into BDSM but enjoy other interests from group sex to hotwifing to cuckolding and on and on. In my opinion, both Fetlife and Literotica have their pluses and minuses, but I enjoy both for separate reasons.

Thanks thats insightful.
 
It's kinda interesting if you want to read a lot of posts from others about what they're doing, or struggling to find, or whatever. Some of the groups are interesting from time to time.

The meetups never worked for where I am, and I checked in to the local group just the other day and laughed...it's like a comedy skit where 2 guys must have showed up, sat across the restaurant and stared at people wondering who else was there for the meeting but didn't know anyone, and then got bored and left. And the person who suggested the meetup in the first place didn't show up. The guy who moderates the group couldn't go and got pissed that they picked that day, etc. etc.

But I've looked at plenty of groups and postings and maybe I learned something....like Dommes are very unfriendly people in general, and you can get kicked out of groups if the admin doesn't think you should be there.

Kinda like Lit, but much more serious.

I guess in summary it's interesting. Might not lead to anything real, however.
 
It's kinda interesting if you want to read a lot of posts from others about what they're doing, or struggling to find, or whatever. Some of the groups are interesting from time to time.

The meetups never worked for where I am, and I checked in to the local group just the other day and laughed...it's like a comedy skit where 2 guys must have showed up, sat across the restaurant and stared at people wondering who else was there for the meeting but didn't know anyone, and then got bored and left. And the person who suggested the meetup in the first place didn't show up. The guy who moderates the group couldn't go and got pissed that they picked that day, etc. etc.

But I've looked at plenty of groups and postings and maybe I learned something....like Dommes are very unfriendly people in general, and you can get kicked out of groups if the admin doesn't think you should be there.

Kinda like Lit, but much more serious.

I guess in summary it's interesting. Might not lead to anything real, however.


Sounds interesting . Im surprised to hear doms are dicks. They didnt seem that way on here back when the bdsm board was a lot more acrive.
 
I have joined a couple times, but eventually forget about it after a while. I have never met anyone from there or even really talked to anyone there. Here, reddit, or dating apps on the other hand I have lots of success with connections and good vibes. For some reason I just can't get into fetlife.
 
If you happen to be a writer, it's full of people who copy work and then post it as their own. Management seems to be at best indifferent, at worst hostile toward people calling it out as well.

I've had dozens of mine posted under multiple people's names, and then reported by members who are on both sites. Signed up to confirm for myself that they were actually claiming credit rather than re-posting with proper attribution, and called it out on my website, asking readers who were members there to report the violations.

Within a couple of days, management deleted my account on the site. The reports by members of the violation of their own policy were ignored, and at last check, the scumbags were still claiming credit for my work and basking in the adulation they received.

They seem to have a problem with ignoring revenge porn as well, though that's entirely second hand from people who were already pissed about my stories being horked, so take it with a grain of salt.
 
My main issue with it is that you can't filter searches for other members. From my experience if you want to look for someon into a particular kink in your area, you have to look through the list person by person.

Other than that it does have lots of forums (or groups in Fetlife) based on different topics.
 
Agreed there - you have to make a serious effort to comb through the site looking for kink compatibility. That being said, the upside of such a sprawling mess is its size - if you are into something, somewhere on the site there are members and dedicated groups that share your fetishes.
 
I found my parents Fetlife profile.

That pretty much killed it for me there.

WOW.... I've often wondered if I'd ever see a profile of someone I KNOW but seeing your parents is the stuff of crazy movies. On the other hand, I had an online "friendship" with a woman on Fet who was quite open with her daughter and son in law about her and hubby's BDSM activities. In fact, she gave daughter and son in law pointers on various sorts of rope bondage and how to hang ceiling hooks for suspension activities. Also shared advice on various sorts of paraphernalia from floggers to vibrators. I know I could never share such stuff with family members but I suppose others have a different point of view. Hell, my wife wouldn't even go to a "BDSM convention" being held at a local hotel for fear of "seeing somebody who knows us." My attitude was "If they see us, we see them. Then it's a level playing field."
 
I'm on Fetlife I think its fine. I have no problems navigating or using the features and love the diverse discussion groups they have. Plus its where I can check out if there are any events near me.

There are a lot of advice groups that can be of great value, and not just sex related. Just about anything you can think of.
 
I consider Fetlife like a Kinky Facebook. It's much better if you know the people already. Otherwise it is good for the forums, like here, can be good or bad.

same user name there btw
 
The fibromyalgia boards I've gotten the most help from are on FetLife. Ones else where tend toward the "god will cure you" BS.

Otherwise, I've found more than a few idiots that required a block button but ya can't have everything.
 
I like Fetlife and found the community there to be eclectic, interesting and very helpful.
 
I was advised by friends to claim to be ninety. I did this and left my gender blank. I've only received about one comment a year from someone I don't know, and no dick pics. Friend with similar profile but also saying 31F next to her name - a dozen dick pics a week...

Useful for keeping track of regional events; forums I find are we either dead or full of completely moronic discussions. Can usually find nice pictures, though.
 
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