Sexless Marriages

[Stilllearning2b]

I can see the sense in that, but I don't fancy the idea. I still hold out hopes of fun yet to come.

I’d like to say I am a pragmatist, but reality is more like pessimist. I have lost seeing the benefit in holding out or hoping for “fun yet to come”. Guess I have been on the roller coaster to long. The ascent is merely the anticipation of the valley below. The peak is but torture.

 

[mrcoolhandluke]

Not in the last ten years sadly and she won’t discuss it

 

[pbnjay]

I love oral sex
I love eating her pussy and ass

Sadly
She does not like sucking on my penis

And that is something I truly desire
I love having my penis sucked
So it kills the mood for sex

Could be why I have such an oral fixation on suckling a penis

 

[MascaraRuns]

I am surprised to see 2 women respond to this thread. I don't know any guys in their 40's or 50's who don't want sex. I quite wrongly thought this was a guy only problem. I guess you learn something new every day. Thanks for sharing.

You would be surprised at how many women are in sexless, or practically so, marriages.

 

[The_gladiator]

You would be surprised at how many women are in sexless, or practically so, marriages.

Still surprises me though even though I know it’s true...

 

[DDBustyBrit]

Still surprises me though even though I know it’s true...

Yep I am one and I have at half a dozen female friends the same! The difference is they seem to be okay with it as all in their 50’s and menopausal.

I am out the other side and rampant and not accepting of it!

 

[The_gladiator]

Yep I am one and I have at half a dozen female friends the same! The difference is they seem to be okay with it as all in their 50’s and menopausal.

I am out the other side and rampant and not accepting of it!

If I had a wife that wanted it all the time, I’d give it to her, all the time lol.

 

[UgliestSon]

I might try to bang my wife for once tonight. I bought a bunch of wine that we’re drinking and made some Coq au Vin. Hopefully my playlist of 90s hip-hop and 60s garage rock does not kill the mood. Luckily she has not seen all my ATM withdrawals and hotel charges from the last few days. Then I’d be truly fucked.

 

[CrowdedStranger]

Going on 2 years now. Wife used to be a nympho but has lost all interest. I respect her feelings but that doesn't do a damn thing about mine.

 

[AnnieLit]

If I had a wife that wanted it all the time, I’d give it to her, all the time lol.

Good for you. Not all husbands are capable of giving exactly what their wifes need. Not because they don't want to, but because they just can't.

 

[gentold]

Good for you. Not all husbands are capable of giving exactly what their wifes need. Not because they don't want to, but because they just can't.

The same could be said of women

 

[MutualMatureMike]

Good for you. Not all husbands are capable of giving exactly what their wifes need. Not because they don't want to, but because they just can't.

That's true. In an ideal world everything we do would be just right, but we live in a world with rough edges and imperfections don't we?

 

[gentold]

That's true. In an ideal world everything we do would be just right, but we live in a world with rough edges and imperfections don't we?

"we live in a world with rough edges"


where over postings are passe

 

[MutualMatureMike]

"we live in a world with rough edges"


where over postings are passe

Wouldn't that be an under-posting, ah, unless the opposite thread display option is selected.

 

[LookingGlassLicker]

Anyone else with this problem?
I have a high sex drive and the wife doesn't.
Looking for others with this problem, and possibly helping fill our needs.

I had this problem, which is one of the reasons I'm getting divorced.

The fact that my (ex, I'm counting the days) wife refers to herself as "a really sexual person" is laughable to me. Our sex life had all but dried up by the time we got married (but we were still really close and I hoped it was just a dip), there was virtually nothing until we spent a week trying to conceive, then her pregnancy and her fear of future pregnancies kept us from any intimacy for a few years.

After a while I convinced her to let me go down on her, which then became the only sex we had (never reciprocated) until about two years ago. By that point I'd lost interest in her, I'd realised that she was kinda a selfish person. We had some good times for about six months, anal play became a thing we did, but it was too little too late.

My autism diagnosis and her subsequent bitchiness about it was enough for me to suggest that neither of us were happy and quitting might be good. Honestly, that conversation took 15 minutes and I've (we've?) been happy ever since.

I have a better sex life with a toy and a delicious temptress I met here than I ever had with my wife.

 

[newhere2learn]

I had this problem, which is one of the reasons I'm getting divorced.

The fact that my (ex, I'm counting the days) wife refers to herself as "a really sexual person" is laughable to me. Our sex life had all but dried up by the time we got married (but we were still really close and I hoped it was just a dip), there was virtually nothing until we spent a week trying to conceive, then her pregnancy and her fear of future pregnancies kept us from any intimacy for a few years.

After a while I convinced her to let me go down on her, which then became the only sex we had (never reciprocated) until about two years ago. By that point I'd lost interest in her, I'd realised that she was kinda a selfish person. We had some good times for about six months, anal play became a thing we did, but it was too little too late.

My autism diagnosis and her subsequent bitchiness about it was enough for me to suggest that neither of us were happy and quitting might be good. Honestly, that conversation took 15 minutes and I've (we've?) been happy ever since.

I have a better sex life with a toy and a delicious temptress I met here than I ever had with my wife.

Good for you. Hope it works out.

Your (ex) wife sounds a lot like mine, who's got MH issues as well being highly selfish. Currently she's not coping with life, the kids, home .. so naturally (as ever) she's laying 100% of the blame at my door.

Over the last 5-7 days physical contact has reduced, to the point of her now refusing to let me even touch her as I brush past.

She suggested divorce (must be the 4th or 5th time now) but every time so far it's been empty promises.

I'm torn as I love her, and know that the woman I see struggling right now isn't the real her. It's the illness/issues talking. She goes into fight/flight mode, just existing wears her out to the point of collapse.

I *suspect* the route cause is job changes for both of us, and family upheaval which will have knock on effects with childcare and time at home.

However, she's now refusing to speak to me for 90% of the time, angry over anything/nothing and shut the kids out too.

I know (from experience) that if we separated (again) she will say/do anything to protect herself. She's utterly petrified of anyone knowing that she's struggling. In the past false DV claims, 911 and all manner of lies told to friends and family is the norm.

As such, to punish me she will take the kids and go for every cent she can financially, even though I don't have anything.



Currently I am riding it out. But, split between opening the door for her and giving up on trying to help her, or riding it out.



For context all weekend she's done exactly as she pleases, leaving me to do chores/childcare/pets etc. meanwhile she's still complaining that "you do fuck all at home" and "I have no time to myself".


I've sorted pets, kids, cars, numerous laundry loads, DIY, and House clearance. And still I was greeted with; "you could've cleaned the bathroom". While she sat on her phone watching TV.

Effectively when in this mindset, she builds up such a list of jobs that no man/woman could succeed in meeting her targets. That way, she can then blame me for all the wrong doings.

 

[AnnieLit]

The same could be said of women

Of course it can! And this is the sad realty most people on this thread are living with.

 

[KDBisback]

Anyone else with this problem?
I have a high sex drive and the wife doesn't.
Looking for others with this problem, and possibly helping fill our needs.

Been married almost 23 years. Two teenage kids. Sex about once a week, mostly out of guilt imo. Wife has no libido and when we do have sex it’s always the same. Rarely foreplay. I’ve licked her pussy once in two years and near the same time for a blow job.
Some say I shouldn’t complain as I am getting it once a week. But it lacks passion and heat!

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

Lol. Actually quite sick of talking if you know what I mean

well, in that case---, if you are ANYWHERE near the Detroit metro area.

Drop me a pm...

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

Been married almost 23 years. Two teenage kids. Sex about once a week, mostly out of guilt imo. Wife has no libido and when we do have sex it’s always the same. Rarely foreplay. I’ve licked her pussy once in two years and near the same time for a blow job.
Some say I shouldn’t complain as I am getting it once a week. But it lacks passion and heat!

lay off all sex with her and keep your hands off yourself and concentrate on doing Kegels exercise for guys for about a month or 2...then when you go for your regular once a week session and after about 20 minutes of working on her like a jackhammer, get up and walk out of the bedroom asking if she likes the new you or the old sex.
And as far as those people who tell you what you deserve in the way of sex, if you are giving them any heed at all, then you are getting more than you deserve the way things are now.

 

[pennst8er91]

Ditto to most

Had sex once in the past year. And that was me inititating in the middle of the night (I suspect I was half-asleep and acting out my dream). She seemed to enjoy but didn't get out of missionary position.

She's never flirty, never initiates, always has excuses. It has just...worn me down. For several years I kept trying, and got rebuffed or was given promises for doing something later that were never kept. Tried talking about it, and she blamed it on several medical things, all of which have been addressed since then. Still nothing. She has put on some weight and has even thrown that in my face, that somehow it's actually me who isn't interested, even though I'm the only one initiating.

I just get tired of trying.

 

[Spenser41]

I want to say something... just because I am in a sexless marriage and have been for many years does not mean that I want to go bi or gay. So bi guys, please do not PM me... I am NOT interested. If I never ever have sex again, I will not be with a man. Sorry.... NOT MY BAG..... If it is not a woman... then I am out.

 

[Spiritedlady]

I don’t feel I can post on this thread anymore.... it’s a shame. It had a promising start but has been reduced to “ my wife is a bitch “

 

[Spenser41]

I don’t feel I can post on this thread anymore.... it’s a shame. It had a promising start but has been reduced to “ my wife is a bitch “

Sorry... I have never said that or even hinted at that. Just trying to relate to others.

 

[MutualMatureMike]

I don’t feel I can post on this thread anymore.... it’s a shame. It had a promising start but has been reduced to “ my wife is a bitch “

That is a double shame.