Just because I'm curious

[blulilacgrl]

I've been wondering this for a while so I'm just gonna put it out there. I see a lot of personals that say "just looking for good conversation doesn't have to be sexual or lead to anything just want to talk to someone". Okay so I'm paraphrasing a bit but you get the idea, right? I gotta admit it makes me pause for a minute. Do y'all actually mean that? Raise your hand if you are interested in just chatting, strictly platonic, no hopes or fantasies of more, just good natured chit chat. Anyone?

'Cause here's the deal...I love to chat. I admit that I tend to float in and out of here due to familial obligations and just the general relentless chaos of my household. But when I catch a moment I enjoy sitting down and catching up with someone. The problem comes about when that post looking for just a friend to chat with turns into the person wanting more. And yeah yeah I know, this is an erotica site after all. So I shouldn't be surprised. Truth is I'm not surprised or shocked anymore. Just a little disappointed.

But still I'm left wondering if there is anyone out there who wants just to connect. A platonic, no hopes or aspirations or expectations of anything else....just chat. Is there anyone like that here?

 

[royhobbs67]

Your Lit Post

I just read your articulate Lit post. You likely received several responses, but I thought I would send you a response to thank you for saying what many of us that thoguht about the site and its members.

I would like to know a bit more about what you are looking for in terms of a chat partner and so forth here.

Just a bit about me: I am a professional man. I own a weekly newspaper in Virginia. I have diverse interests, including, obviously, erotica. I adore free-spirited women who are smart and wirte in complete sentences.

There is much more, but I won't take your time unless we somehow connect.

If I don't hear back from you, I wish you well in your quest here.
Roy

 

[blulilacgrl]

I just read your articulate Lit post. You likely received several responses, but I thought I would send you a response to thank you for saying what many of us that thoguht about the site and its members.

I would like to know a bit more about what you are looking for in terms of a chat partner and so forth here.

Just a bit about me: I am a professional man. I own a weekly newspaper in Virginia. I have diverse interests, including, obviously, erotica. I adore free-spirited women who are smart and wirte in complete sentences.

There is much more, but I won't take your time unless we somehow connect.

If I don't hear back from you, I wish you well in your quest here.
Roy

Just fun banter. No expectations of anything sexual. Friends. Pals. Countrymen. Lol.

I really have no desire to explore anything more with anyone new. Think of it as an online version of grabbing a pizza and a beer and just chatting. Nothing more.

Tell me about your day or what your favorite pizza toppings is. Hell let's debate the choice of pineapple on pizza. Let's talk about anything and everything but without the idea that it will ever be anything more than just two friends chatting and goofing off. Does that make sense?

 

[Jed_]

Just fun banter. No expectations of anything sexual. Friends. Pals. Countrymen. Lol.

I really have no desire to explore anything more with anyone new. Think of it as an online version of grabbing a pizza and a beer and just chatting. Nothing more.

Tell me about your day or what your favorite pizza toppings is. Hell let's debate the choice of pineapple on pizza. Let's talk about anything and everything but without the idea that it will ever be anything more than just two friends chatting and goofing off. Does that make sense?

Pineapple on Pizza? Now that confuses my taste buds. lol

 

[blulilacgrl]

Pineapple on Pizza? Now that confuses my taste buds. lol

I gotta admit I'm a fan. The salty/sweet combo is awesome!

 

[Liftelect]

I love pineapple on pizza, it's yummy

 

[Jed_]

I gotta admit I'm a fan. The salty/sweet combo is awesome!

Good point. I like sweet and sour chicken so maybe I'll give it a try. Heck.... I'll try anything once. lol

 

[Liftelect]

And yes I can have just a conversation with no expectations I just get bored and would enjoy someone to just talk to and pass some time

 

[Blase]

For me, the answer is "sometimes".

There are times, for example, when I'll write just to compliment someone on the quality and content of their posts.

But still, I do tend to contact people who interest me, and it would be disingenuous to pretend that sexuality was not at least potentially a part of that interest when it often is.

 

[Jed_]

I second what Liftelect said. But a gentleman never breaks in line or cuts in on a dance. Pm me some day. Y'all have an awesome evening. Thanks so much.

 

[blulilacgrl]

Good point. I like sweet and sour chicken so maybe I'll give it a try. Heck.... I'll try anything once. lol

I say you should always try it twice. You never know if maybe the first time it just wasn't made properly.

And yes I can have just a conversation with no expectations I just get bored and would enjoy someone to just talk to and pass some time

Exactly! Thank you!

For me, the answer is "sometimes".

There are times, for example, when I'll write just to compliment someone on the quality and content of their posts.

But still, I do tend to contact people who interest me, and it would be disingenuous to pretend that sexuality was not at least potentially a part of that interest when it often is.

So does the interest wane if it is made apparent that nothing will ever happen?

 

[blulilacgrl]

I second what Liftelect said. But a gentleman never breaks in line or cuts in on a dance. Pm me some day. Y'all have an awesome evening. Thanks so much.

Wait... there was a line? Lol. Did I miss it?

 

[Liftelect]

If you ever feel like talking pm me

 

[Blase]

So does the interest wane if it is made apparent that nothing will ever happen?

I don't think it ever wanes just because of that. Mind you, it's not uncommon to contact someone and realize at a certain point that you just don't seem to have a lot in common, or your communication styles are very different... but that can happen whether you've written to someone in answer to an ad, or simply to ask a question or compliment them on their writing.

 

[gcoop3]

I've been wondering this for a while so I'm just gonna put it out there. I see a lot of personals that say "just looking for good conversation doesn't have to be sexual or lead to anything just want to talk to someone". Okay so I'm paraphrasing a bit but you get the idea, right? I gotta admit it makes me pause for a minute. Do y'all actually mean that? Raise your hand if you are interested in just chatting, strictly platonic, no hopes or fantasies of more, just good natured chit chat. Anyone?

'Cause here's the deal...I love to chat. I admit that I tend to float in and out of here due to familial obligations and just the general relentless chaos of my household. But when I catch a moment I enjoy sitting down and catching up with someone. The problem comes about when that post looking for just a friend to chat with turns into the person wanting more. And yeah yeah I know, this is an erotica site after all. So I shouldn't be surprised. Truth is I'm not surprised or shocked anymore. Just a little disappointed.

But still I'm left wondering if there is anyone out there who wants just to connect. A platonic, no hopes or aspirations or expectations of anything else....just chat. Is there anyone like that here?

If I am going to be honest and I always try to be, I am looking for ladies I can chat with, develop a friendship and hope it turns playful. I have been fortunate enough to have had several of those over the years. Some of those just fizzled and a few turned into platonic chats that still linger.

The answer is I like the friendship to playful, but if we connect and it never turns playful that can also be fulfilling. If that expectation is set initially then I would take the time to see if we connect and have a new friend in the end. Just skipping the playful stage.

 

[Blase]

The answer is I like the friendship to playful, but if we connect and it never turns playful that can also be fulfilling. If that expectation is set initially then I would take the time to see if we connect and have a new friend in the end. Just skipping the playful stage.

Well said.

Yes, some friendships do wind up skipping the "playful" stage.

 

[blulilacgrl]

I don't think it ever wanes just because of that. Mind you, it's not uncommon to contact someone and realize at a certain point that you just don't seem to have a lot in common, or your communication styles are very different... but that can happen whether you've written to someone in answer to an ad, or simply to ask a question or compliment them on their writing.

Yeah that sucks but it happens. Conversations peter out or you find you just can't seem to find the rhythm of a good back and forth. Even nonsexual conversations require a good give and take. I guess I've just been pondering the nature of platonic conversations here. Don't get me wrong, I have a few. Really interesting people that I honestly smile when I get a message. But I find those people are few and far between. Meanwhile I wade through messaging with someone for a while only to find, he didn't think I meant it when I said platonic. It's always an interesting position of having to explain that I don't play coy. I tend to be a pretty direct and to the point kind of person.

If I am going to be honest and I always try to be, I am looking for ladies I can chat with, develop a friendship and hope it turns playful. I have been fortunate enough to have had several of those over the years. Some of those just fizzled and a few turned into platonic chats that still linger.

The answer is I like the friendship to playful, but if we connect and it never turns playful that can also be fulfilling. If that expectation is set initially then I would take the time to see if we connect and have a new friend in the end. Just skipping the playful stage.

Okay... define playful. lol. Because I see playful and think just joking and literally being playful. But I have the feeling you mean it in a different manner.

 

[EctoJohn]

Admittedly, I'm never the type to want to just chit chat, not even with the few personals I've posted here (and most those are clearly sexual in nature).

However, if you're an actually single person talking to another single of the type you're sexually interested in,
how long can you actually go, especially in this kind of place, only interested in conversation?

Hypothetically, let's say I was the type that was just looking to talk.
Now I'm talking to a girl on here in private, and it's going well.
Inevitably we're going to become friends, even in a platonic manner.
That's natural. Anyone you can talk to and get along with long enough will become a friend.
So now we're friends that are chatting on a regular basis.
I'm a guy, she's a girl, we're both single, we're both straight.
It's bound to happen, one of us will want more.
Even a relationship that starts off innocent will always lead to curious places.
You can only have a friend like that so long, knowing each other better and better until that road has to be crossed,
and on a website like this, sexual topics happen, there is no dodging that topic forever.

I can't see how you'd be disappointed.
I'd think you're a little foolish for expecting it to never happen no matter what your intentions are at the start.
That doesn't even happen in the real world, why would it happen in a more sexually charged environment like this?

 

[RavenousRuby]

I've been wondering this for a while so I'm just gonna put it out there. I see a lot of personals that say "just looking for good conversation doesn't have to be sexual or lead to anything just want to talk to someone". Okay so I'm paraphrasing a bit but you get the idea, right? I gotta admit it makes me pause for a minute. Do y'all actually mean that? Raise your hand if you are interested in just chatting, strictly platonic, no hopes or fantasies of more, just good natured chit chat. Anyone?

'Cause here's the deal...I love to chat. I admit that I tend to float in and out of here due to familial obligations and just the general relentless chaos of my household. But when I catch a moment I enjoy sitting down and catching up with someone. The problem comes about when that post looking for just a friend to chat with turns into the person wanting more. And yeah yeah I know, this is an erotica site after all. So I shouldn't be surprised. Truth is I'm not surprised or shocked anymore. Just a little disappointed.

But still I'm left wondering if there is anyone out there who wants just to connect. A platonic, no hopes or aspirations or expectations of anything else....just chat. Is there anyone like that here?

I have been on and off Lit for about a year. I can tell you that I have had several platonic chat partners that I still talk to until this day. Generally, if I'm the one contacting men, it's because I want more than just chatting. If the men are contacting me, I let them know right away that nothing will happen if we do not have a connection. And frankly, many times, there simply isn't a connection.

You are a woman on Lit. You can dictate exactly what you want. And if they fail, block them.

 

[Booboobear84]

Sort of

I've been wondering this for a while so I'm just gonna put it out there. I see a lot of personals that say "just looking for good conversation doesn't have to be sexual or lead to anything just want to talk to someone". Okay so I'm paraphrasing a bit but you get the idea, right? I gotta admit it makes me pause for a minute. Do y'all actually mean that? Raise your hand if you are interested in just chatting, strictly platonic, no hopes or fantasies of more, just good natured chit chat. Anyone?

'Cause here's the deal...I love to chat. I admit that I tend to float in and out of here due to familial obligations and just the general relentless chaos of my household. But when I catch a moment I enjoy sitting down and catching up with someone. The problem comes about when that post looking for just a friend to chat with turns into the person wanting more. And yeah yeah I know, this is an erotica site after all. So I shouldn't be surprised. Truth is I'm not surprised or shocked anymore. Just a little disappointed.

But still I'm left wondering if there is anyone out there who wants just to connect. A platonic, no hopes or aspirations or expectations of anything else....just chat. Is there anyone like that here?

I like chatting with women because you have many perspectives that I don’t. Rarely is it strictly platonic since I curious about sex from your side. I also like the idea that if something happens it happens.

Example last night I spoke with a woman who I see at dances all of the time and her hubby. She told me how she liked that I wore a blazer and looked dapper. Conta dancing is athletic and tends to be a t shirt crowd. I told her one reason I did it is that it meant my back was dry when my partner holds me. She then launched in to a five minute monologue about how men should be more considerate about that. Who knew? Apparently a much bigger deal than I thought.

 

[blulilacgrl]

Admittedly, I'm never the type to want to just chit chat, not even with the few personals I've posted here (and most those are clearly sexual in nature).

However, if you're an actually single person talking to another single of the type you're sexually interested in,
how long can you actually go, especially in this kind of place, only interested in conversation?

Hypothetically, let's say I was the type that was just looking to talk.
Now I'm talking to a girl on here in private, and it's going well.
Inevitably we're going to become friends, even in a platonic manner.
That's natural. Anyone you can talk to and get along with long enough will become a friend.
So now we're friends that are chatting on a regular basis.
I'm a guy, she's a girl, we're both single, we're both straight.
It's bound to happen, one of us will want more.
Even a relationship that starts off innocent will always lead to curious places.
You can only have a friend like that so long, knowing each other better and better until that road has to be crossed,
and on a website like this, sexual topics happen, there is no dodging that topic forever.

I can't see how you'd be disappointed.
I'd think you're a little foolish for expecting it to never happen no matter what your intentions are at the start.
That doesn't even happen in the real world, why would it happen in a more sexually charged environment like this?

Except I'm not single. I'm not looking for a single man. I am upfront and honest in dealing with people. So if I tell you that I am not now, nor will I ever, engage in anything more than platonic, good natured chats, I mean exactly that. I don't mind talking about sexual topics. I get that this is an erotica site and yeah there is always going to be the possibility of that topic coming up in a general sense but that doesn't mean that I want to engage in cybering or sexting or anything like that.

I have been on and off Lit for about a year. I can tell you that I have had several platonic chat partners that I still talk to until this day. Generally, if I'm the one contacting men, it's because I want more than just chatting. If the men are contacting me, I let them know right away that nothing will happen if we do not have a connection. And frankly, many times, there simply isn't a connection.

You are a woman on Lit. You can dictate exactly what you want. And if they fail, block them.

I too have met a few people that are amazing and I am so grateful for them. There is a particular one that means that absolute world to me. I don't know if I would get through some of my really rough times without him. And yet completely platonic. So I know it can be done. But damn does it require dealing with a lot of people who seem to think I am just being coy when I set the parameters of not wanting to engage in sexual things.

 

[Liftelect]

Good point RavonousRuby

 

[Jada59]

I love to chat too. I chat with all sorts of people here and it's not always about sex. I often chat about food with people.

 

[blulilacgrl]

I like chatting with women because you have many perspectives that I don’t. Rarely is it strictly platonic since I curious about sex from your side. I also like the idea that if something happens it happens.

Example last night I spoke with a woman who I see at dances all of the time and her hubby. She told me how she liked that I wore a blazer and looked dapper. Conta dancing is athletic and tends to be a t shirt crowd. I told her one reason I did it is that it meant my back was dry when my partner holds me. She then launched in to a five minute monologue about how men should be more considerate about that. Who knew? Apparently a much bigger deal than I thought.

Hmmm.... I'm thinking maybe people are confused by my use of platonic. I use the word as it is defined "(of love or friendship) intimate and affectionate but not sexual."

I don't mind talking about sex. Like you it's interesting to get someone else's view. But just because I will discuss those topics in addition to the more everyday type of topics, doesn't mean I want to have sex or have a romantic relationship. Does that make sense?

 

[blulilacgrl]

I love to chat too. I chat with all sorts of people here and it's not always about sex. I often chat about food with people.

FOOD!! Hell yeah! Lol. Always a good topic. I have a friend who always finds the best food joints for me to try new things! Love it! What's your favorite type of food?