My new story

[DerekM]

Hi, everyone. I just published a story in the First Time section. The title is "Heather's Virgin". I'd love to get some constructive feedback, as I'm sure I'll probably want to rewrite it soon,

 

[Emirus]

You need to put your request in story feedback together with a link to your story.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Hi, everyone. I just published a story in the First Time section. The title is "Heather's Virgin". I'd love to get some constructive feedback, as I'm sure I'll probably want to rewrite it soon,

Welcome to the Authors Hangout, DerekM, and congratulations on submitting your first story on Literotica. Drop in to Tex’s Coffee Shop thread and introduce yourself. Fresh food for the Literotica trolls is always welcome and I see your story’s already attracted one LOL. Don’t be put off, we all get those ones and that one was pretty funny, all things considered. You will learn to ignore them. Really, you will.

I’ll PM you a few comments on your story later.

 

[NotWise]

Welcome to the Authors Hangout, DerekM, and congratulations on submitting your first story on Literotica. Drop in to Tex’s Coffee Shop thread and introduce yourself. Fresh food for the Literotica trolls is always welcome and I see your story’s already attracted one LOL. Don’t be put off, we all get those ones and that one was pretty funny, all things considered. You will learn to ignore them. Really, you will.

Kindof a rough crowd over there in First Time.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Kindof a rough crowd over there in First Time.

There’s expectations as to First Time, just like the other categories and DerekM’s story had the girl going with “the other guy” so it was more of a “Loving Girlfriends” story and those do get an adverse reaction from some readers. Now if the main protagonist had scored and then she’d gone off with the other guy... they could handle that.

 

[DerekM]

Thanks, Chloe. I wasn't sure if it really fit the First Time category or not since Gerald is still a virgin at the end of the story. Because Heather does lose her's, I went ahead and posted in First Time. II guess what I'm trying to find out if people find the ending depressing. I'd love to know what you think.

 

[DerekM]

Thanks. Will do.

 

[CoffeeWithMonkeys]

Here's a link for anyone that wants to read it.
https://www.literotica.com/s/heathers-virgin

I'll read it after I've had more coffee.

And welcome! Do pop in over at the Author's Hangout, and come have coffee at Tex's. He has tea and sometimes goodies he shares!

 

[DerekM]

Thanks.