What reason has someone given you to end an online relationship?

[SWMilkMaid]

I don't know if others have met someone really appealing and interesting online and there, in the middle of a sentence or perhaps after a sentence, the budding relationship is all over. Just like that.

In my case, I gave the wrong response about the appearance of my breasts. I'm 60, I'm not used to people asking me to describe them. Before I know what is happening, this gentleman just shuts everything down. He wants "Verification" of who I am.

I'm an 85D in France.

Maybe people should do their "Verification" before commencing a dialogue.

 

[StElmosFire]

I don't know if others have met someone really appealing and interesting online and there, in the middle of a sentence or perhaps after a sentence, the budding relationship is all over. Just like that.

In my case, I gave the wrong response about the appearance of my breasts. I'm 60, I'm not used to people asking me to describe them. Before I know what is happening, this gentleman just shuts everything down. He wants "Verification" of who I am.

I'm an 85D in France.

Maybe people should do their "Verification" before commencing a dialogue.

I offer free verification services. Just send pics to my inbox.

 

[Noor]

I don't know if others have met someone really appealing and interesting online and there, in the middle of a sentence or perhaps after a sentence, the budding relationship is all over. Just like that.

In my case, I gave the wrong response about the appearance of my breasts. I'm 60, I'm not used to people asking me to describe them. Before I know what is happening, this gentleman just shuts everything down. He wants "Verification" of who I am.

I'm an 85D in France.

Maybe people should do their "Verification" before commencing a dialogue.

You should have dumped him. My breasts are not me, they are an accident of birth. I don't mind sharing them with lovers, but if I don't know who you are and where you live, whatever my criteria is, you ask, I say no, if you walk your loss.
Decent guys don't ask, they wait to be shown when you feel like it and are comfortable.
They are WAY more guys on Lit than women, and many like mature women, so it's a woman's market, make your standards high. Hell, even if it wasn't, high standards are important.

 

[Noor]

In answer to your question, I believe the most common reason is that they somehow forgot they are in an exclusive relationship with their spouse and have small children or that sort of thing.

Another one is they have the above and have gotten too attached to you/Lit/porn whatever and are now going offline.

 

[Jada59]

In once case, I knew the reason. Reality!

I used to run a chat room. I was married. So was he. I chatted with his wife. She didn't like me. I didn't like how she treated him. Our relationship wasn't a romance since we both knew that couldn't happen given that we were married. But we had a lot in common.

I was living in MA and flying back to WA for the holidays. I deliberately routed my plane through the airport next to where he worked so we could meet up. The meeting went great! But... I was pregnant at the time. That was the reality. He never wanted children.

We did chat after that but not much at all after the baby was born, but that was mainly because I was too busy. I also had to make a cross country move.

By the time I got moved, the place that hosted my chat room had closed. I was still in contact with several from the chat room but he sort of vanished and nobody knew where he went.

It would have been easy for me to have tracked him down but I didn't try. Some things just need to end. But it was good while it lasted.

 

[SWMilkMaid]

I offer free verification services. Just send pics to my inbox.

To St. Elmos:

LOL! I bet you'd make a great detective!!
Thank you for the laugh!

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To Noor

I was in a conversation with a compelling man. A very compelling man. Are you serious about "dumping" him because he asked a question that I felt comfortable responding to? No. That decision is up to each one of us.

I don't think that it had anything to do with potential size or shape. I honestly think that he would have enjoyed whatever I had to offer but something about my description due to tiredness and fumbling around for words just seemed to set off alarm bells with him.

I've also never heard of verification in order to talk/chat. But then again, I've been living in a cave until just recently. I guess social interactions have changed quite a bit.

Thank you, Noor, for your feedback.

 

[jp55665566]

Sometimes I meet someone online that I'm more-than-friends attracted to, and naturally want to be alone with her exclusively for awhile. But, it doesn't mean I hafta break-up with friends I hope. Another good thing about online relationships is "break-ups" are less awkward.

 

[PaulieJay]

I don't know if others have met someone really appealing and interesting online and there, in the middle of a sentence or perhaps after a sentence, the budding relationship is all over. Just like that.

In my case, I gave the wrong response about the appearance of my breasts. I'm 60, I'm not used to people asking me to describe them. Before I know what is happening, this gentleman just shuts everything down. He wants "Verification" of who I am.

I'm an 85D in France.

Maybe people should do their "Verification" before commencing a dialogue.

Welcome to Lit (& if this didn't happen here get ready)

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To Jada59:

Yup, I guess that real life would interfere with an online relationship especially if you were expecting.

You did the right thing for yourself and your family by not pursuing him.

I think that morals unexpectedly arise to the surface when family matters are apparent.

I wish you happy memories

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To jp55665566:

I don't know about awkward but hurtful, yes.

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To PaulieJay:

Thank you for the welcome!!

 

[KarenB59]

I'm not sure exactly what an 'online relationship ' is or what it entails. Rules the same as a real relationship but without the actual physical contact? But I have had online friendships that have ended with no warning or explanation. I wouldn't mind hearing the reasons for ending those too.

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To KarenB59:

I'm sorry that you have lost friendships online. I have lost a couple of friendships in real life with no warning. Just like that.

The very least a person can do is give you a reason for shutting the door on you. It doesn't really ease the pain but at least you have something to focus on.

An online friendship is just that. An online relationship is, I would say, a smoldering potential. Both of course, only exist long-distance within our brain.

All I can say Karen is keep the faith and good luck!

 

[Jada59]

To Jada59:

Yup, I guess that real life would interfere with an online relationship especially if you were expecting.

You did the right thing for yourself and your family by not pursuing him.

I think that morals unexpectedly arise to the surface when family matters are apparent.

I wish you happy memories

Oh I have very happy memories! Thanks!

 

[Luk]

When she makes fun of your love of Armageddon

 

[KimGordon67]

'This is getting too intense and interfering with my feelings about the person I'm committed to RL' is pretty much the reason, most of the time, in a nutshell ... and I've had that reason myself. I think people are often surprised by the intensity of something that doesn't seem 'real' by the usual standards of reality.

 

[Bookishleigh]

"Sometimes love is not enough."

- Very true too. Unless you live close enough to each other or one of you is willing to move, it isn't enough.

 

[SWMilkMaid]

To Jada59:

I'm glad for you We all need some special memories...

 

[SWMilkMaid]

"Sometimes love is not enough."

- Very true too. Unless you live close enough to each other or one of you is willing to move, it isn't enough.

That's a tough one. How does one react to such a statement?

You seem to have survived quite well Compliments...

 

[SWMilkMaid]

'This is getting too intense and interfering with my feelings about the person I'm committed to RL' is pretty much the reason, most of the time, in a nutshell ... and I've had that reason myself. I think people are often surprised by the intensity of something that doesn't seem 'real' by the usual standards of reality.

I agree with you that people don't expect just how intense an online relationship can become. When it's over, the heartbreak can be every bit as painful as a RL rupture.

Thank you for sharing

 

[SWMilkMaid]

When she makes fun of your love of Armageddon

That's it? End of your story together?

There are people out there with more heart...

 

[Bookishleigh]

That's a tough one. How does one react to such a statement?

You seem to have survived quite well Compliments...

One either leaves or takes a break from the online world, throws themselves into their career, a new hobby, a volunteer project, anything that they enjoy - and one day they realize they're all good with everything. And then they never get into an online relationship again.

 

[Mei5ter]

'This is getting too intense and interfering with my feelings about the person I'm committed to RL' is pretty much the reason, most of the time, in a nutshell ... and I've had that reason myself. I think people are often surprised by the intensity of something that doesn't seem 'real' by the usual standards of reality.

Pretty much this. I’ve been on the receiving end of a variation:

“I joined this site because my RL relationship was on the rocks, our sex life had died, and my self-confidence had died with it. But after this year, and you telling me what a sexy, kind, smart and good person I am, I feel better about myself - so I’ve decided to work on my RL relationship. So it’s no longer good for me to be here, so...goodbye.”

Which, I suppose, is a bittersweet kind of compliment.

 

[KimGordon67]

Pretty much this. I’ve been on the receiving end of a variation:

“I joined this site because my RL relationship was on the rocks, our sex life had died, and my self-confidence had died with it. But after this year, and you telling me what a sexy, kind, smart and good person I am, I feel better about myself - so I’ve decided to work on my RL relationship. So it’s no longer good for me to be here, so...goodbye.”

Which, I suppose, is a bittersweet kind of compliment.

Yeah, I think I've had versions of that too. It is kind of compliment, and a service to humanity if you're helping increase the overall quotient of happiness.