Lost and angry reviewer, looking for an owner...

[BiscuitHammer]

I just got a PM from an ab-so-lutely irate reviewer, giving me Hell for what amounts to the WORST gay male sex he has ever had the displeasure of reading in his entire life.

So bad, in fact, was said super happy bum-fun (I might be paraphrasing here), that he apparently shredded all the hard copies he'd printed off of previous chapters and thrown them out. He also pissed on them, because that was all it deserved. I was a cancerous blight on gay erotic literature, I didn't have ANY clue whatsoever about romance between men, and he would make sure that everyone he knew was instructed to avoid any future GM offerings I published on this, or any other, site.

Here's the rub of it, of course...

I've never written gay male erotica in my life. I'm a straight male. The one thing this purple-faced, frothing lunatic got correct is that I have no clue how to write a romance between men. But he only got that right by apparently mistaking me for someone else on here who HAS published a gay male story that he's taken very great offense to.

So, long-short, is anyone here really bad at gay male sex stories and writing them anyway? Because I think this little lamb belongs to you.

Take him. Please. I have my own looney-tunes to deal with.

 

[lovecraft68]

Do yourself a favor and stop posting a thread every time someone says something negative.

Odds are the person is never going to read this because they don't come to the boards.

If they are someone from the boards they are now laughing that that got under your skin therefore giving them what they want.

Also everyone here gets them and far worse than that and has for years, so just learn to deal with it without running here to gripe/vent about it. More you write the more you're going to get them. Its the nature of a site that allows anonymous posters.

 

[JasonClearwater]

I just got a PM from an ab-so-lutely irate reviewer, giving me Hell for what amounts to the WORST gay male sex he has ever had the displeasure of reading in his entire life.

So bad, in fact, was said super happy bum-fun (I might be paraphrasing here), that he apparently shredded all the hard copies he'd printed off of previous chapters and thrown them out. He also pissed on them, because that was all it deserved. I was a cancerous blight on gay erotic literature, I didn't have ANY clue whatsoever about romance between men, and he would make sure that everyone he knew was instructed to avoid any future GM offerings I published on this, or any other, site.

Here's the rub of it, of course...

I've never written gay male erotica in my life. I'm a straight male. The one thing this purple-faced, frothing lunatic got correct is that I have no clue how to write a romance between men. But he only got that right by apparently mistaking me for someone else on here who HAS published a gay male story that he's taken very great offense to.

So, long-short, is anyone here really bad at gay male sex stories and writing them anyway? Because I think this little lamb belongs to you.

Take him. Please. I have my own looney-tunes to deal with.

Sorry, that one might be for me. Give him my number and a benzo, and have him call me in the morning.

 

[BiscuitHammer]

Do yourself a favor and stop posting a thread every time someone says something negative.

Odds are the person is never going to read this because they don't come to the boards.

If they are someone from the boards they are now laughing that that got under your skin therefore giving them what they want.

Also everyone here gets them and far worse than that and has for years, so just learn to deal with it without running here to gripe/vent about it. More you write the more you're going to get them. Its the nature of a site that allows anonymous posters.

I'm just confused. How did this ding-dong end up with me?

I freely admit, it never occurred to me that someone randomly chose me to PM about a story I never wrote.

*thinks*

This could be made into a story, now that I think of it...

 

[BiscuitHammer]

Sorry, that one might be for me. Give him my number and a benzo, and have him call me in the morning.

lol, Jason, I'm very unlikely to fault you with writing the horrible gay porn this yahoo is screaming about. Don't get me wrong, you're more than welcome to him, but I think he's still in the wrong airport if I send him to you.

I like Lovecraft's theory, that he's some womble who just randomly chose me to screech at in PM about something that didn't get written by anyone. I may run with it as an homage to the greater dementia.

 

[Jada59]

I'm sorry but I find that rather humorous. Obviously the poor fellow was confused!

 

[BiscuitHammer]

I'm sorry but I find that rather humorous. Obviously the poor fellow was confused!

Don't be sorry, it IS funny. And the best way to keep it funny is to write a cheerful, humorous post aboot it.

I'm determined to turn this incident into a story. Humour/Satire? Here I cum!!!!

*rides off in naked muse chariot*

 

[Gentleman_G]

In contrast to lovecraft, I'm finding it hilarious to read such messages. Perhaps they're not meant to share, but then again ... if they're this hilarious, why wouldn't you?

But if lovecraft's so against it, perhaps we should just do a thread about funny PMs?

 

[BiscuitHammer]

Lovrcraft's concern was that I not be posting and/or venting every time I get a negative comment or PM. Totally understandable, except I enjoy writing humorous posts about them and making everyone laugh.

As for actually venting every time I got a negative review or PM, well... if I were to do that, I'd have 38,000 posts by tomorrow, and ain't nobody got time for that. Nope, I'm just here to spread the joy of cray-cray readers/reviewers and given people a chuckle.

*yawn!* Michael sleep now...

 

[member9458]

Lovrcraft's concern was that I not be posting and/or venting every time I get a negative comment or PM. Totally understandable, except I enjoy writing humorous posts about them and making everyone laugh.

As for actually venting every time I got a negative review or PM, well... if I were to do that, I'd have 38,000 posts by tomorrow, and ain't nobody got time for that. Nope, I'm just here to spread the joy of cray-cray readers/reviewers and given people a chuckle.

*yawn!* Michael sleep now...

In other circles I run in, this is the kind of thing that would definitely be best contained in one thread because it's smoother that way. You do you, of course, I honestly don't care; I'm just saying it's something to consider if you're worried about pissing people off with multiple threads.

 

[SimonDoom]

That is pretty funny.

But it gives me pause, too. I've thought about trying my hand at a gay male story, but as a straight guy who would be sailing into uncharted waters I don't want to stir up a bunch of angry trolls who think I have no clue.

 

[BiscuitHammer]

That is pretty funny.

But it gives me pause, too. I've thought about trying my hand at a gay male story, but as a straight guy who would be sailing into uncharted waters I don't want to stir up a bunch of angry trolls who think I have no clue.

Yeah, I would end up with the mechanical prose of the sex, and even the romantic aspect would feel forced. Hats off to anyone who can write it, not because it's difficult because it's GM, but because I just don't think I'm good enough to pull it off. There are better writers on here than me who could do it without blinking, even if they don't normally write that sort of thing.

 

[KindofHere]

.............

 

[JasonClearwater]

Yeah, I would end up with the mechanical prose of the sex, and even the romantic aspect would feel forced. Hats off to anyone who can write it, not because it's difficult because it's GM, but because I just don't think I'm good enough to pull it off. There are better writers on here than me who could do it without blinking, even if they don't normally write that sort of thing.

The thing about GM readers, is that there are less arseholes reading the cat, and they're a lot more forgiving than, say, LW or IT.

No one's ever pointed out my typos, and they're in there. No one's ever sent me an enraged PM, and I've been here nearly a year. The feedback's usually fair. I get criticism, but it's rarely the mental rage you describe. I might not agree with it, but it's not in any way upsetting or disturbing.

It's a much smaller readership though. Not the same views or likes or votes you'd get in IT.

 

[lovecraft68]

That is pretty funny.

But it gives me pause, too. I've thought about trying my hand at a gay male story, but as a straight guy who would be sailing into uncharted waters I don't want to stir up a bunch of angry trolls who think I have no clue.

A few months ago I wrote my first ever Gay male scene. No clue what I was doing so I made it a nasty violent hate fuck because...turning it into a train wreck may mask the fact I have no goddamn clue what I'm doing.

 

[BiscuitHammer]

The thing about GM readers, is that there are less arseholes reading the cat, and they're a lot more forgiving than, say, LW or IT.

No one's ever pointed out my typos, and they're in there. No one's ever sent me an enraged PM, and I've been here nearly a year. The feedback's usually fair. I get criticism, but it's rarely the mental rage you describe. I might not agree with it, but it's not in any way upsetting or disturbing.

It's a much smaller readership though. Not the same views or likes or votes you'd get in IT.

So it's more like the Novels/Novellas crowd, near as I can tell. The readership is a little more... urbane? Certainly my most constructive and objective reviews has been of my Novels submission.

I woke up this afternoon, feeling intent of writing a parody story about this incident. "A crazed reader mistakes one writer for another. Hilarity ensues."

You work with what you're given, right? My Muses may not always appreciate it (Calliope, the ringleader, has been cranky of late), but as long as they do their damn job, I'll keep those neck chains they wear loose...

 

[lovecraft68]

In contrast to lovecraft, I'm finding it hilarious to read such messages. Perhaps they're not meant to share, but then again ... if they're this hilarious, why wouldn't you?

But if lovecraft's so against it, perhaps we should just do a thread about funny PMs?

Go for it, just remember that I believe its a rule to not post PM's publicly so in addition to leaving out the name don't post the whole thing.

Then when that person sees you doing it be sure to report back about the one bombs and anon nasty comments on your stories.

But TBH I'm not sure if the OP is talking about lit feedback or actual private messages

 

[BiscuitHammer]

A few months ago I wrote my first ever Gay male scene. No clue what I was doing so I made it a nasty violent hate fuck because...turning it into a train wreck may mask the fact I have no goddamn clue what I'm doing.

THANK YOU!!!!!! I had a hard enough time writing a scene where a girl was having sex with a bi boy who liked to to be pegged. And that was just indulgent young people sex.

Only thing I'd be worse at would be BDSM. Might as well ask me to build a fusion reactor from Build-A-Bear parts...

 

[ElectricBlue]

But it gives me pause, too. I've thought about trying my hand at a gay male story, but as a straight guy who would be sailing into uncharted waters I don't want to stir up a bunch of angry trolls who think I have no clue.

Give it a whirl, it can be most rewarding. I'm "hetero normative" in the sense that irl I have neither the desire nor the inclination to wander very far from women, but these are some of the comments I've received:

From a woman who knows my writing well: "you write your GM interludes 'with enthusiasm'" - which made me smile.

From another woman: "So beautiful. So sad. Regretful. Nostalgic. Sweet. So vulnerable. Thank you for writing it. I think I will be returning to it again. And again. And again."

(Some women just looove tender GM content...)

My biggest compliment though, is from my erstwhile collaborator, Jason Clearwater:

"I can't be held responsible for your ability to write a brilliant bum fuck. And your blokes don't have to be gay. Just heteroflexible."

Just don't put your GM content into any of the "real men" categories - your average Lit bloke reacts with extravagance whenever he gets all hot and bothered with that gay man scene you surprised him with. They protest too loudly, methinks.

 

[SimonDoom]

Give it a whirl, it can be most rewarding. I'm "hetero normative" in the sense that irl I have neither the desire nor the inclination to wander very far from women, but these are some of the comments I've received:

From a woman who knows my writing well: "you write your GM interludes 'with enthusiasm'" - which made me smile.

From another woman: "So beautiful. So sad. Regretful. Nostalgic. Sweet. So vulnerable. Thank you for writing it. I think I will be returning to it again. And again. And again."

(Some women just looove tender GM content...)

My biggest compliment though, is from my erstwhile collaborator, Jason Clearwater:

"I can't be held responsible for your ability to write a brilliant bum fuck. And your blokes don't have to be gay. Just heteroflexible."

Just don't put your GM content into any of the "real men" categories - your average Lit bloke reacts with extravagance whenever he gets all hot and bothered with that gay man scene you surprised him with. They protest too loudly, methinks.

What's the name of your story?

 

[JasonClearwater]

What's the name of your story?

He's talking about this one: https://www.literotica.com/s/the-floating-world-pt-04-1

 

[SimonDoom]

He's talking about this one: https://www.literotica.com/s/the-floating-world-pt-04-1

Thanks!

 

[ElectricBlue]

He's talking about this one: https://www.literotica.com/s/the-floating-world-pt-04-1

Jason takes half the credit, as it's a collaboration - we took pre-existing characters and bumped them together.


The "write with enthusiasm" comment was in the context of this one:

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-floating-world-pt-02

which, although it's a sequel to a very successful story FW Part 1, got only a tenth of the views. The clue is in the title: Amanda and her "men" plural. People didn't even open it, for fear of what they might find. Fools - they missed out on Amanda in a gorgeous blue silk dress.


Jason's comment is about a WIP - he keeps suggesting "plot notes" for my male characters, I'm not quite sure why...

 

[Etaski]

Hilarious, BiscuitHammer, thanks for sharing. Somehow "cray-cray" just has the perfect ring for weird things like this. A nude muse chariot sounds delightful.

I think this is a good way to process comments like this (though public thread or private chatter has different results). I have my group. A favorite exercise is taking an occasional jewel to my most creatively sarcastic friend (not on Lit) and just sit back and see his first response to it. I collapse laughing much of the time. It's like having my own stand-up comedian and I'm feeding him the launch points.

Certainly, I recognize the spirit here.

 

[BiscuitHammer]

Hilarious, BiscuitHammer, thanks for sharing. Somehow "cray-cray" just has the perfect ring for weird things like this. A nude muse chariot sounds delightful.

I think it's fun, although the ladies don't appreciate the weird postures I put them in to form the chassis...