Women over 50 questions

[Idyll]

Women over 50:

• Do you find you enjoy sex more or less than when you were under 50?
• Have your sexual interests changed in significant ways? If so, how?
•*Are you more or less mindful of sexuality on a day-to-day basis?

I'm a hetero male in my late 50s. Curious and interested.

 

[Yzwoman]

I am a woman in my early 50's. Menopause, which happened a little over a year ago, has had a huge impact on my sexually. I used to have a fierce libido, stronger than my husband's. Now, suddenly, it is greatly diminished. I don't find myself as interested in sex at all; in fact, some sexual acts or images that used to arouse me very much now sometimes slightly repel me.

I've been to the doctor and there is nothing physically "wrong" with me.

I am aware that I am aging: my body, despite regular exercise and attention to diet, is changing, morphing into that of an older woman. My skin is less firm, my face more wrinkled, my hair more gray. People can't even euphemistically call me "miss" any more. Fewer men of any age try to catch my eye. I've had to start using estrogen cream as my once copious feminine moisture .... well, I can't bring myself to say those ugly words.

The need or desire to have sex or masturbate occurs less frequently. I can still have orgasms easily and they can feel as intense as before. I just am less interested at working at them to have them. Having an orgasm has almost become a minor physical need that I like to just take care of with a minimum of fuss.

Part of me really hates this transition and hopes it may only be temporary, that I will reach a new steady state. Part of me, oddly, feels a curious freedom and clarity. My moods are much more stable than during the tremulous perimenopausal years.

 

[Idyll]

Thanks for responding, Yz.

I've heard other women express similar experiences.

 

[Titts4Tatts]

I felt I just had to reply. I'm soon to be 55. I'm one of the fortunate ones who sailed through menopause. At least I think over it. Or nearly post menopausal. It's been 6 months or so since my last cycle. No hot flashes ECT.... I still am able to orgasm easily and it feels fantastic. I still notice cute guys. I still fantasize and daydream. Only I'm not with anyone. So I can't say what the actual sexual act would be like ? From all indications it would be wonderful. I miss it. I miss it a lot. Now that I'm older I am more guarded. I won't tolerate BS. I'm not so fond of my wrinkles and flaws but I don't let them stop me from living. Basically I still feel very healthy and normal. I earnestly hope my sex life isn't over.

 

[LIVINRFANTASIES]

Dollie

Women over 50: --------Way over 50!

• Do you find you enjoy sex more or less than when you were under 50? Actually did enjoy it more until recently.
• Have your sexual interests changed in significant ways? If so, how? I've done way more than I ever imagined as I got older. I finally realized it's my life and I'll do as I please.
•*Are you more or less mindful of sexuality on a day-to-day basis? Not as much as several months ago. I went through a faze where I couldn't have enough sex. I always wanted more no matter how many men I'd just had. I'm way to old to keep this up and my body is now letting me know that.

I'm a hetero male in my late 50s. Curious and interested.

It's nice to be curious. Curiousity late in life caused me to try things I said I'd never do. Things I was afraid to try. Some of those I shouldn't have tried. Yet I'm glad I tried.
If it wasn't for Lit, my husband, and special friends, I probably would have stopped acting like a young slut long ago.
Now it's mostly my Lit friends that keep me going. I'm nearly back to being a normal little old lady now. If you've read any of our stories you will see I was never really normal.

 

[Idyll]

I felt I just had to reply. I'm soon to be 55. I'm one of the fortunate ones who sailed through menopause. At least I think over it. Or nearly post menopausal. It's been 6 months or so since my last cycle. No hot flashes ECT.... I still am able to orgasm easily and it feels fantastic. I still notice cute guys. I still fantasize and daydream. Only I'm not with anyone. So I can't say what the actual sexual act would be like ? From all indications it would be wonderful. I miss it. I miss it a lot. Now that I'm older I am more guarded. I won't tolerate BS. I'm not so fond of my wrinkles and flaws but I don't let them stop me from living. Basically I still feel very healthy and normal. I earnestly hope my sex life isn't over.

Sounds healthy. Do you seek out partners in social settings?

 

[Titts4Tatts]

Not really. I haven't dated in forever. I'm raising an 11 year old. That's pretty much my social life.

 

[triciaNC]

Better with age?

I am 53. I have actually found some things better with age. I only started squirting when I orgasm a few years ago. Turns off some men. Others think it is hot. I enjoy giving oral sex more than I used to. I tend to look at men/boys and wonder what it would be like in bed all the time.

 

[pikmin1388]

I'm 52 , sex drive is as high as ever , I'm discovering alsorts of things especially through lit , no sign of menopause, but I do need a really good lube to use with my toys now .
Orgasms do take ages but could be one of the consequences of a sexless relationship rather than age ,
I just seem to get more adventurous huge list of things to try which just gets longer and longer

 

[Jada59]

I'm 58. Just waiting for my divorce to finalize. Only real difference that I've noticed is some vaginal dryness and the tissue thinning out down there and that can cause irritation. I don't really like the feel of lube so that doesn't help.

What does help? Listening to subliminal Youtube videos. They have some for vaginal tightness, wetness, hands free orgasm, nipple stimulation, etc. Some are better than others. I am currently listening to one and finished listening to several others.

And now? I feel as though I am being tortured. Sitting here with soaking wet panties and my various parts all swollen, tingling and ready for orgasm. I am easily orgasmic and some of these are supposed to cause a hands free orgasm. But for me, they are just super stimulating.

The weird thing for me is how many men are coming into my life now! I had a marriage that was not good and we'd been married for a very long time. He pretty much drove everyone out of my life, including my family. Why? Don't know because he sure didn't want me.

So... Basically, I am now looking to the future and seeing all of my options. I don't really want to get into a relationship right now after getting out of such a bad one. But there is a younger man I am seriously attracted to. So that's keeping me going. Not sure if he feels the same way about me. I suspect so given that he gives me super good hugs and sometimes just his hugs or the sound of his voice causes me to orgasm.

Another possibility is a guy that I had a crush on when I was 18 and he was 17. I didn't let that go anywhere for starters because at that age, a guy who was a year younger just didn't seem right to me. I soon put that notion aside after I got older but then I became his boss and that stopped me from acting on my feelings as well.

Then a few years went by and I ran into him. He was still as sexy and appealing as ever but both of us had partners. Not married. Just partners.

Fast forward to realizing that he was in an online group that I am also in. I contacted him. We spoke briefly and it seemed not to go anywhere. But after a month or so, he contacted me again. Or course he has aged, but he still sets my heart aflutter.

And there are numerous other men that are now back in my life or that I have newly met. I just really like pretty much everything about men and like being in their company. Well, most of them anyway. And aside from those married years, most of my friends were men.

So I seem to have a ton of options but... The unfinished divorce is still tripping me up. Papers should have been filed with the court back in Jan. after we went to mediation but now my ex and his lawyer are playing nasty little games and throwing cogs into the works at every turn. That's a story unto itself and one that I won't go into any more here. Bleh!

So basically I have had a super strong sex drive ever since I hit puberty. And at times it was unbelievably strong. Like when I was dating an older guy who was into tantric sex and other things.

Then after I got married, it grew even stronger. This was really a bad thing because my husband was in the military and never around much. And even when he was, he rarely wanted sex and put so many parameters on it that there was no pleasure whatever for me and I found it hard to believe that it could be any fun for him. Turns out that the men in his family think sex is just great before marriage but after, it is for procreation only.

So.. Yeah. I am just sitting here as horny as ever and mostly having to take matters into my own hands while watching that clock tick and hoping that any minute now I will truly be single. Then watch out world!

I will have to say though that I seem atypical. I do have some female friends and when I talk to them about stuff like this, they just can't relate. The other day, one of my friends said, "You were one of those girls that all the guys flocked to!" And actually they did. I think the reason is that I don't get easily embarrassed and I would talk to them openly about things they wanted to know. Such as things about women's bodies, sexuality and stuff. They said when they asked other females, they either got their face slapped or she just walked away and never spoke to them again.

So while I was never really one who got asked on dates (as in romantic) a lot, I was never lacking for men in my life. I guess that's a good thing.

 

[mikendel]

Do you find you enjoy sex more or less than when you were under 50? More now. Before I had to get in the mood. Now I can have sex and love it at the drop of a hat. When asked now if I can, suck it, swallow, cum in me, titfuck, facial I say sure,
• Have your sexual interests changed in significant ways? If so, how? Yes. When I was younger I could not cum orally. Now I can and love it.
•*Are you more or less mindful of sexuality on a day-to-day basis? Much more.

 

[Idyll]

I'm 52 , sex drive is as high as ever , I'm discovering alsorts of things especially through lit , no sign of menopause, but I do need a really good lube to use with my toys now .
Orgasms do take ages but could be one of the consequences of a sexless relationship rather than age ,
I just seem to get more adventurous huge list of things to try which just gets longer and longer

Top 3 items on the list, please?

 

[Idyll]

I'm 58. Just waiting for my divorce to finalize. Only real difference that I've noticed is some vaginal dryness and the tissue thinning out down there and that can cause irritation. I don't really like the feel of lube so that doesn't help.

What does help? Listening to subliminal Youtube videos. They have some for vaginal tightness, wetness, hands free orgasm, nipple stimulation, etc. Some are better than others. I am currently listening to one and finished listening to several others.

And now? I feel as though I am being tortured. Sitting here with soaking wet panties and my various parts all swollen, tingling and ready for orgasm. I am easily orgasmic and some of these are supposed to cause a hands free orgasm. But for me, they are just super stimulating.

The weird thing for me is how many men are coming into my life now! I had a marriage that was not good and we'd been married for a very long time. He pretty much drove everyone out of my life, including my family. Why? Don't know because he sure didn't want me.

So... Basically, I am now looking to the future and seeing all of my options. I don't really want to get into a relationship right now after getting out of such a bad one. But there is a younger man I am seriously attracted to. So that's keeping me going. Not sure if he feels the same way about me. I suspect so given that he gives me super good hugs and sometimes just his hugs or the sound of his voice causes me to orgasm.

Another possibility is a guy that I had a crush on when I was 18 and he was 17. I didn't let that go anywhere for starters because at that age, a guy who was a year younger just didn't seem right to me. I soon put that notion aside after I got older but then I became his boss and that stopped me from acting on my feelings as well.

Then a few years went by and I ran into him. He was still as sexy and appealing as ever but both of us had partners. Not married. Just partners.

Fast forward to realizing that he was in an online group that I am also in. I contacted him. We spoke briefly and it seemed not to go anywhere. But after a month or so, he contacted me again. Or course he has aged, but he still sets my heart aflutter.

And there are numerous other men that are now back in my life or that I have newly met. I just really like pretty much everything about men and like being in their company. Well, most of them anyway. And aside from those married years, most of my friends were men.

So I seem to have a ton of options but... The unfinished divorce is still tripping me up. Papers should have been filed with the court back in Jan. after we went to mediation but now my ex and his lawyer are playing nasty little games and throwing cogs into the works at every turn. That's a story unto itself and one that I won't go into any more here. Bleh!

So basically I have had a super strong sex drive ever since I hit puberty. And at times it was unbelievably strong. Like when I was dating an older guy who was into tantric sex and other things.

Then after I got married, it grew even stronger. This was really a bad thing because my husband was in the military and never around much. And even when he was, he rarely wanted sex and put so many parameters on it that there was no pleasure whatever for me and I found it hard to believe that it could be any fun for him. Turns out that the men in his family think sex is just great before marriage but after, it is for procreation only.

So.. Yeah. I am just sitting here as horny as ever and mostly having to take matters into my own hands while watching that clock tick and hoping that any minute now I will truly be single. Then watch out world!

I will have to say though that I seem atypical. I do have some female friends and when I talk to them about stuff like this, they just can't relate. The other day, one of my friends said, "You were one of those girls that all the guys flocked to!" And actually they did. I think the reason is that I don't get easily embarrassed and I would talk to them openly about things they wanted to know. Such as things about women's bodies, sexuality and stuff. They said when they asked other females, they either got their face slapped or she just walked away and never spoke to them again.

So while I was never really one who got asked on dates (as in romantic) a lot, I was never lacking for men in my life. I guess that's a good thing.

Thanks for such a well composed response!

 

[pikmin1388]

Top 3 items on the list, please?

Mm hard one but top would have to be a really good massage from a naked guy who loved to massage me all over especially my pussy
Two sex riding a guy hard while he touches and plays with me
Three to be tied up teased and dominated
I'm sneaking in this because it's a joint third really .. to tie up and use a guy thoroughly be in complete control and possibly use a strap on

 

[Idyll]

Do you find you enjoy sex more or less than when you were under 50? More now. Before I had to get in the mood. Now I can have sex and love it at the drop of a hat. When asked now if I can, suck it, swallow, cum in me, titfuck, facial I say sure,
• Have your sexual interests changed in significant ways? If so, how? Yes. When I was younger I could not cum orally. Now I can and love it.
•*Are you more or less mindful of sexuality on a day-to-day basis? Much more.

Interesting. To what do you attest the renewed drive?

 

[mikendel]

Interesting. To what do you attest the renewed drive?

Once the kids moved out the drive skyrocketed. I started to relax and enjoy sex.

 

[Kira2489]

Enjoy sex so much more at 51 than when I was a young woman !

My sexual interests have changed immensely with maturity. As a young woman i was insure with my sexuality.
Just over the last 6 years I've realized part of my sexuality was getting into my head, being dominated, bound, impact , spanking, predicaments.
Most of all the right partner !
Definitely, enjoy sex more and look forward to day to day intimacy.
There are definitely some challenges at times, for me it was vaginal dryness. A couple times a week i use an estrogen cream. Viola' no longer any issue !

 

[Cocksuckerxpert]

I just turned 50 and once a nympho always a nympho I guess. LOL My drive hasn’t altered as far as I can tell. Unless it’s grown stronger.

 

[4215]

Honest

I'm 58. Just waiting for my divorce to finalize. Only real difference that I've noticed is some vaginal dryness and the tissue thinning out down there and that can cause irritation. I don't really like the feel of lube so that doesn't help.

What does help? Listening to subliminal Youtube videos. They have some for vaginal tightness, wetness, hands free orgasm, nipple stimulation, etc. Some are better than others. I am currently listening to one and finished listening to several others.

And now? I feel as though I am being tortured. Sitting here with soaking wet panties and my various parts all swollen, tingling and ready for orgasm. I am easily orgasmic and some of these are supposed to cause a hands free orgasm. But for me, they are just super stimulating.

The weird thing for me is how many men are coming into my life now! I had a marriage that was not good and we'd been married for a very long time. He pretty much drove everyone out of my life, including my family. Why? Don't know because he sure didn't want me.

So... Basically, I am now looking to the future and seeing all of my options. I don't really want to get into a relationship right now after getting out of such a bad one. But there is a younger man I am seriously attracted to. So that's keeping me going. Not sure if he feels the same way about me. I suspect so given that he gives me super good hugs and sometimes just his hugs or the sound of his voice causes me to orgasm.

Another possibility is a guy that I had a crush on when I was 18 and he was 17. I didn't let that go anywhere for starters because at that age, a guy who was a year younger just didn't seem right to me. I soon put that notion aside after I got older but then I became his boss and that stopped me from acting on my feelings as well.

Then a few years went by and I ran into him. He was still as sexy and appealing as ever but both of us had partners. Not married. Just partners.

Fast forward to realizing that he was in an online group that I am also in. I contacted him. We spoke briefly and it seemed not to go anywhere. But after a month or so, he contacted me again. Or course he has aged, but he still sets my heart aflutter.

And there are numerous other men that are now back in my life or that I have newly met. I just really like pretty much everything about men and like being in their company. Well, most of them anyway. And aside from those married years, most of my friends were men.

So I seem to have a ton of options but... The unfinished divorce is still tripping me up. Papers should have been filed with the court back in Jan. after we went to mediation but now my ex and his lawyer are playing nasty little games and throwing cogs into the works at every turn. That's a story unto itself and one that I won't go into any more here. Bleh!

So basically I have had a super strong sex drive ever since I hit puberty. And at times it was unbelievably strong. Like when I was dating an older guy who was into tantric sex and other things.

Then after I got married, it grew even stronger. This was really a bad thing because my husband was in the military and never around much. And even when he was, he rarely wanted sex and put so many parameters on it that there was no pleasure whatever for me and I found it hard to believe that it could be any fun for him. Turns out that the men in his family think sex is just great before marriage but after, it is for procreation only.

So.. Yeah. I am just sitting here as horny as ever and mostly having to take matters into my own hands while watching that clock tick and hoping that any minute now I will truly be single. Then watch out world!

I will have to say though that I seem atypical. I do have some female friends and when I talk to them about stuff like this, they just can't relate. The other day, one of my friends said, "You were one of those girls that all the guys flocked to!" And actually they did. I think the reason is that I don't get easily embarrassed and I would talk to them openly about things they wanted to know. Such as things about women's bodies, sexuality and stuff. They said when they asked other females, they either got their face slapped or she just walked away and never spoke to them again.

So while I was never really one who got asked on dates (as in romantic) a lot, I was never lacking for men in my life. I guess that's a good thing.

Really enjoyed your post , the honesty and lack of pretension is refreshing in this day and age.
I'm just a bit older than you and unfortunately most women in our age group are so closed off its a wonder they managed to have sex never mind hold a husband .
You won't be on the market for long IF you're looking for a man to share your life and obviously overflowing libido.
Enjoying our sexuality at our age isn't difficult finding the right partner is the problem . That's one reason why I'm a Lit enthusiast . Relax and enjoy the experience, that's my motto these days !

 

[Jada59]

Really enjoyed your post , the honesty and lack of pretension is refreshing in this day and age.
I'm just a bit older than you and unfortunately most women in our age group are so closed off its a wonder they managed to have sex never mind hold a husband .
You won't be on the market for long IF you're looking for a man to share your life and obviously overflowing libido.
Enjoying our sexuality at our age isn't difficult finding the right partner is the problem . That's one reason why I'm a Lit enthusiast . Relax and enjoy the experience, that's my motto these days !

Thanks. I don't have to look. Already have many in my life right now. Not that there's anything really going on with them but there could be!

 

[Moxon10]

complete turn on

I am 53. I have actually found some things better with age. I only started squirting when I orgasm a few years ago. Turns off some men. Others think it is hot. I enjoy giving oral sex more than I used to. I tend to look at men/boys and wonder what it would be like in bed all the time.

I am very much into mature women, and this is a complete turn on