man with deficits looking for a similar woman

glBock

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07-September: Since the "woman of my dreams" and I recently ended our e.mail exchange, after she had told me to still be a supporter of Donad Trump today, I added a caveat to the end of my ad. In addition, I had already added the following explanation in late August, to avoid misunderstandings:

The offer of mine to you, contained in my ad, is for part of my time most every day. No more and no less. For intimate companionship that both of us no longer enjoy in our primary relationships, but that we search for anyway. If my offer works out well, you can turn into a blooming flower again, and I can become a real man once more.

But such companionship will work out only, when "mutuality" comes into play for both of us. Meaning that you have to need it as much as I do, and you commit to it as strongly as I do also. And when we trust each other, right from the beginning. The liking for one another, that I hope will happen with time, and the erotic attraction, are things that will (hopefully) develop over time. But the trust I mention must be present from the start. Otherwise the "whole package" I offer will not work.

++++++++++++ my original ad dated 19-aug-2017: ++++++++++++++++++++

This new ad of mine is meant to become a reset. If you are reading it, you should take it as an offer primarily. Not as one-sided an offer, as my last ad might have sounded, but an honest offer nevertheless.

I am trying to reach a woman, who feels similar deficits as I do, and who searches for what I am offering: companionship by mail. My signature post describes everything I like to include in such a companionship. Something that I know many women look for as well; I suppose for the same reasons I do. Because feeling alone in the intimate erotic realm is simply a rather shitty situation. That word is not a bad description. Not that you and I cannot cope with the "loneliness" we experience; we would perish if we weren't able to do that. But we are not coping with it happily.

A few times I have experienced temporary moments of happiness, when a woman and I began exchanging mails with each other, which addressed this loneliness problem of ours. That is the state I like to reach again, but this time not for a short time only, but for longer. Why have some mail exchanges of mine come to a (sometimes abrupt) end? One reason had been impatience on my part. When I begin to get interested in a woman, I like to pursue the "getting-to-know-one-another" process, and a pause of several days between mails then makes me anxious; I admit that. After all, when I begin opening myself up, it really disturbs me to wait a week until I hear the assurances from you that I look for. I'd find it very helpful, if you felt the same way.

Another necessity I feel is some form of basic trust in one another. What I mean is a presumption on my part, that you are a valuable human being, underneath all your words and thoughts, regardless of what you tell me exactly. And the same trust towards me should exist as well. Empathy, and an inherent commitment for wanting to understand another person, are required for this, I know.

Next you should possess similar needs as I do, for the mail exchange I look forward to. If you have only a mild interest in the companionship I seek – perhaps because you live in a happy relationship – or if you communicate intimately with five other men already, you are not likely to be "right" for me.

And you should also have a similar desire as I have, for the amount of stuff you feel like sharing with me. The exchange I seek is to become a two-way street, not one with a "consumer" on one end, and a "contributor" on the other.

+++++++++++++++++ inserted 08 Sep 17: ++++++++++++++++++++

I am afraid I have to add another caveat here. In case you voted for Trump last year, and if by now you have NOT yet realized, what a terrible mistake that was, I don't care to hear from you. As much as I long for meeting the woman of my dreams, I cannot live with a person with a mental make-up like that.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you have made it this far reading my ad, I ask you to check, how well your wishes and desires coincide with mine. And to consider PMing me, in case you see a substantial alignment between ourselves. And I wish you a good day also.
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thank you!

Hello Princess, thank you for your good wishes yesterday. I hope as well for some success of my ad.

BTW, I looked at your profile: cool, I would say. Especially the explanation of your user name. Have a nice day, and thanks again.
 
Eureka!!!

NO more need for any more bumps. since I found the woman I had been looking for.

Halleluhja!!
 
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NO more need for any more bumps. since I found the woman I had been looking for.

Halleluhja!!

My EUREKA feelings did not last all that long, when the woman of my dreams told me that she still supports Donald Trump today. For that reason, I modified my ad a little, and I am bumping it again.
 
IMO, it's a shame that something as frivolous as politics can prevent/end a relationship. Best wishes though.
 
IMO, it's a shame that something as frivolous as politics can prevent/end a relationship. Best wishes though.
thanks, I appreciate your comment. And thanks for your good wishes.

But I find nothing frivolous about a MINDSET of an intimate friend of yours, that you simply find unacceptable.
 
some reflections on intimite mail exchanges

My experiences with several such exchanges have taught me a thing or two. First strong wishes and desires for on-line companionship exist within women just as much as that's the case for me. That is very fortunate.

Secondly, when such an exchange remains limited to exchanging kinky experiences and fantasies, they seem to work pretty well, because the exact makeup of the person on the other end does not matter so much, as long as they both get turned on by the same kind of kinks. Often such an exchange runs its course rather soon though, because it does not have much of a basis, certainly not a firm one.

Potential problems appear only, when a mail companionship becomes more personal. When a "lonely" man exchanges mails with a lonely woman, and they begin to like each other. Lonely in the sense of missing or much too rare erotic experiences with one's primary partner.

When at least one of the two possesses "sensitivities", which the other one does not share, problems can develop too. Sometimes these amount only to a petty disturbance, which could well be eliminated by a few kind and understanding words, if both were prepared for that. When one of them is not, the mail exchange ends, usually. Even if the disturbance was only a simple misinterpreted statement during the getting-to-know-another process.

But even if both mail partners understand each other (more or less) perfectly, or seem to do so, there always exists the possibility that a serious disagreement comes up, which can well lead to a break-up. Like me finding out lately that the woman of my dreams had not only voted for Trump last year, but that she failed to realize by now, what a menace the man has become for all sorts of societal values, which used to be sacrosanct before. And that she considers newspapers, which employ diligent researchers to dig up the facts, like the New York Times, as "left-wing" hate mongers.

Most likely it is highly improbable that two people, who just discovered an astounding amount of similarities between themselves, and who are overwhelmed and elated about that, will have come to understand the "total person on the other end" already, within a few weeks of mail exchanges.

If you should reply to my now renewed ad, and if we get the feeling we tick along the same (important) lines, I'd most likely send you a list of key questions we must settle, before we begin to really fall for one another. Should something like that disturb you, maybe you better not reply.

And maybe even that's no guarantee for long-term success. If I should discover, a year after we meet, that you have already murdered two of your previous husbands, I would probably pack up and begin to run then.

Enough lamenting now. If I had not been a hopeless optimist all along, and determined to pick myself up again after each defeat, I would not have written this ad in the first place.
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I believe my "frivolous" designation was in regards to politics. Not a mindset of an individual. Just clarifying.

:D
 
I am really searching for a soul mate

Hello George, I think you and I agree fully; no need for your clarification. But thanks anyway. And thank you for giving me the opportunity for another statement:

My ad for a mail exchange partner "targets" someone to exchange erotica with, to be sure. But I am REALLY looking for a soul mate, as I am becoming more and more convinced with time.

Exchanging erotic fantasies is fine and valuable, but more important I find is enticing one another. And to get to like each other deeply, in the process. And that can work only, I am convinced, if both partners have a lot in common. And here, mine and her convictions about Trump and his "side effects" act as a powerful inhibitor for me.
 
Giving him a well-deserved bump.

We've chatted a few times, and he's really a sweet guy. Things just didn't click between us, but the fault was all mine, I'm the first to admit that. He's honest and he knows what he wants. You can't ask for more than that.
 
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