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The no sex marriage

lovetoread

lovetoread

hello daddy
Joined
Mar 16, 2001
Posts
42,978
linky to article

In today’s world, sex is rife with double standards for women. If a woman denies sex to her husband, she is blamed for being frigid or heartless. But when a man denies sex, the woman is also blamed—usually for not being attractive or sexy enough. I fell straight into this trap, blaming myself for his lack of interest. Was I getting too flabby, too boring? Was I not meeting the lady-in-the-streets-but-a-freak-in-the-bed standards that society sets for women?

Intent on rekindling my husband’s interest, I tried to get creative about sex. He wasn’t interested. I told him repeatedly how much I loved him and wanted him. Nada. I started bargaining for sex, and eventually, just begging. All I got in return was night after night of humiliating rejection.
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is sex or the lack of an important part of marriage?
 
lovetoread said:
linky to article



is sex or the lack of an important part of marriage?
Click to expand...

I would think it would depend on how both partners felt about it. I know some people who stopped having sex after a while, had still had sex with others, and lived happily every after. They didn't have any serious relationships with anyone else though.
I think it depends how you define intimacy.

I am not sure I could do it. I am very into specific partnered sex. If I or my partner could not have sex for some medical or physical reason, I could handle it. Usually there is a way around such things, but sometimes there is not. Right now I really can't be around anyone unless they are completely decontaminated. I hope this ends soon, I want to go out and get dirty ;)
 
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this caught my attention cause just yesterday i read an article about how this other woman and husband agreed to have a sex free marriage

to me it would depend on why there was no sex
 
I suppose it depends on the couple, the reasons why they married and the reasons why they stay married.
 
Both partners have to be in agreement. It killed my marriage. His absolute refusal to discuss the issue or seek help for it seeped into every aspect of our relationship and it got to the point where we not only had separate bedrooms but completely separate lives. He only later told me that he has always been somewhat asexual and only participated as much as he did early on because he was afraid I would leave.

Sadly, I had a lot of girlfriends who would roll their eyes and complain about their husbands pawing at them and then they would say, "I should send my husband to you!" I wonder if they really would feel that way if their husbands were asexual.
 
Fermina_Daza said:
Both partners have to be in agreement. It killed my marriage. His absolute refusal to discuss the issue or seek help for it seeped into every aspect of our relationship and it got to the point where we not only had separate bedrooms but completely separate lives. He only later told me that he has always been somewhat asexual and only participated as much as he did early on because he was afraid I would leave.

Sadly, I had a lot of girlfriends who would roll their eyes and complain about their husbands pawing at them and then they would say, "I should send my husband to you!" I wonder if they really would feel that way if their husbands were asexual.
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We may be related through marriage
How do you feel about incest?
 
Fermina_Daza said:
Both partners have to be in agreement. It killed my marriage. His absolute refusal to discuss the issue or seek help for it seeped into every aspect of our relationship and it got to the point where we not only had separate bedrooms but completely separate lives. He only later told me that he has always been somewhat asexual and only participated as much as he did early on because he was afraid I would leave.

Sadly, I had a lot of girlfriends who would roll their eyes and complain about their husbands pawing at them and then they would say, "I should send my husband to you!" I wonder if they really would feel that way if their husbands were asexual.
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This. So much this.
 
Sex is absolutely crucial in my honest opinion! It's a form of intimacy!

I believe the day should always end with some passionate love making. Sometimes I get sick of the puritanical attitude towards sex, it is one of the most beautiful things in life.

That said, both partners have to be on the SAME page with sex. If one constantly wants it and the other does not, then wow, obviously it's not going to work barring health issues.
 
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There is no point in being in a sexually monogamous, sexually exclusive relationship with someone you're not having sex with.

You are then roommates. Why not simply be roommates if that's what you want to be? You can be friends, confidants whatever you want to be...but you are not 8n an actual marriage, if you are not having sex.
 
if there wasn't such a stigma to having a low drive, more people would be honest, much heartbreak could be prevented.
 
Que said:
There is no point in being in a sexually monogamous, sexually exclusive relationship with someone you're not having sex with.

You are then roommates. Why not simply be roommates if that's what you want to be? You can be friends, confidants whatever you want to be...but you are not 8n an actual marriage, if you are not having sex.
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That's really blatantly stupid, even for you, dumbass.
 
Que said:
There is no point in being in a sexually monogamous, sexually exclusive relationship with someone you're not having sex with.

You are then roommates. Why not simply be roommates if that's what you want to be? You can be friends, confidants whatever you want to be...but you are not 8n an actual marriage, if you are not having sex.
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Sounds good in theory, but often there's just enough sex to bring about babies
After that, shit gets complicated
 
Que said:
There is no point in being in a sexually monogamous, sexually exclusive relationship with someone you're not having sex with.

You are then roommates. Why not simply be roommates if that's what you want to be? You can be friends, confidants whatever you want to be...but you are not 8n an actual marriage, if you are not having sex.
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it is nobody's place to decide the validity of another's happy relationship.
 
pensivepoet said:
After that, shit gets complicated
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Yep.

Your partner may not be entitled to keep you in a roommate relationship, but those kids never asked to be born. Something's just have to be more important than our sex lives. Much as that may suck...
 
no child deserves to live in a home that is not happy

you dont need to live with one another to raise a child
 
lovetoread said:
no child deserves to live in a home that is not happy

you dont need to live with one another to raise a child
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Oh, I totally agree.

But there is unhappy and there is just unfulfilled. And there are options for getting one's "itch scratched" short of breaking a home.
 
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