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Control II

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Magicginger said:
Fair enough. Thanks for humoring my curiosity!
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My thought (at the risk of side-tracking a thread that isn't really about 'thoughts') is that it's not really a hugely dominant thing, nor that far off vanilla ... I'd tend to frame it as something you might do 'with' someone, rather than 'to' them - she's pretty clearly involved in the whole process too.
 
KimGordon67 said:
My thought (at the risk of side-tracking a thread that isn't really about 'thoughts') is that it's not really a hugely dominant thing, nor that far off vanilla ... I'd tend to frame it as something you might do 'with' someone, rather than 'to' them - she's pretty clearly involved in the whole process too.
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I am submissive to my husband during sex and completely agree about her being a very willing participant! It was a poor choice of word usage on my part and I'm sorry I implied that it was something being done to her, rather than a full partner in the act. I also agree that blindfolded head is vanilla, but I certainly don't feel qualified to differentiate due to me being a dirty, dirty slut.

Thank you for pointing out my carelessness. I sometimes say stupid and/or crazy shit.
 
Magicginger said:
I am submissive to my husband during sex and completely agree about her being a very willing participant! It was a poor choice of word usage on my part and I'm sorry I implied that it was something being done to her, rather than a full partner in the act. I also agree that blindfolded head is vanilla, but I certainly don't feel qualified to differentiate due to me being a dirty, dirty slut.

Thank you for pointing out my carelessness. I sometimes say stupid and/or crazy shit.
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You weren't out of line.
If you were, he wouldn't have answered.
 
midwestdude said:
I actually agree with this statement, but she wont let me do things like this because I'm not really sexually dominant and she said these thing would be weird if I did them. Which is where my original statement came from, of letting another man do this to her.
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So it's not really about her vanilla-ness then ...
 
Magicginger said:
I am submissive to my husband during sex and completely agree about her being a very willing participant! It was a poor choice of word usage on my part and I'm sorry I implied that it was something being done to her, rather than a full partner in the act. I also agree that blindfolded head is vanilla, but I certainly don't feel qualified to differentiate due to me being a dirty, dirty slut.

Thank you for pointing out my carelessness. I sometimes say stupid and/or crazy shit.
Click to expand...

No, the 'to her' thing happened much earlier ... it's not a poor word choice, and probably accurately represents how people see things like this. It's just not how I see it, and I sometimes wonder if it might help work through potential issues around this sort of thing if people shifted their perception a bit ... but that's just my opinion.
 
midwestdude said:
Hard to say. I know she watches bdsm porn (when she does watch porn). So I believe she would actually like these things, but it feels "weird" with me I guess?
Thats what makes this tough, im willing to try anything with her, but she doesnt seem to be willing.
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No, I get what you mean - I'm the same with my husband. I very much enjoy sex that involve power/control, but it would definitely not be him. For me personally, I don't enjoy someone doing something *just* because it's what they want - I don't really enjoy it unless they're wholeheartedly into it as well. So maybe that's what your wife means? If you don't want to do it, then just don't ... your initial comment just suggested you did find the idea interesting.
 
midwestdude said:
Do you think that since i havent really ever been sexually dominate with her in the past, it would be weird to start now?
I really believe that i could get into, learn and do it well, or well for what would work for us.
But she seems unwilling to try, since i havent done it in the past and says that it would be weird and just not me.
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I just wanted to tell you that my husband and I had awesome, but vanilla-ish sex for 10 years before one night he just took me and fucked me like my pussy was his(which it was and is). We both came harder than we ever thought possible and have not looked back. We are really good at communication and have never given each other any reason not to trust each other and wow what a fucking adventure! He knows my body better than I do sometimes and coaxes me into amazing sensations. We share fantasies and pics we find hot and feel each other out for new adventures all the time. As long as you're doing it with love in your heart and being completely honest with each other, what do you have to lose?
 
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