Out of my comfort zone

[StrangeTamer]

Hi everyone, I've normally been writing in third person so I went out of my comfort zone and tried writing my first story in first person perspective. I have to admit I was a little uncomfortable writing that way at first but I was more comfortable with it by the time I got to the end of the story. All my stories are in syfy and I put this one in group sex, and what a difference it is from syfy. The first story I've posted has been up since 7/20/16 and just passed 10000 views this story posted early wednesday morning and has over 14000 views already . All in all I don't think it turned out to bad but it's not good either. If anybody wants to look at it, it's a story of a couple that invite their friend over for a threesome. https://www.literotica.com/s/a-magical-night-1

 

[Darkniciad]

Welcome to the weird and wonderful world outside of Sci-Fi

If you've only written in that category ( and Non Human or Erotic Horror ) it can be a bit of a system shock when the views start rolling in.

Post an age-difference story in Mature or a story in Incest and you'll be even more bowled over by the speed at which those numbers tick up.

 

[SimonDoom]

I wrote a comment on your story. I think your choice of first person was appropriate for this category of story, just as third person, I think, usually is the best point of view for a sci fi/fantasy story. My question was with your choice of the person from whose point of view the story was told. If you are going to tell a story about a threesome from the first person point of view, pick the person who has the greatest level of conflict, tension, and nervousness about the encounter. In your story that person appeared to be Sheryl, rather than the husband.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Post an age-difference story in Mature or a story in Incest and you'll be even more bowled over by the speed at which those numbers tick up.

Hmmm. I posted one in Mature ("The Wolf with the Red Roses") and I was honestly a bit disappointed by the # of views. I think it would have done a lot better in First Time. But Incest, yeah, I've only done one and it's got the most views of any of my stories. I honestly can't figure the appeal of Incest, does nothing for me but the readers liked it and read it.

So yeah, post there and clock up 100k views in a week.

Hi everyone, I've normally been writing in third person so I went out of my comfort zone and tried writing my first story in first person perspective.

Well, I took a look and liked it. First person as opposed to third can be a bit of a challenge coz everything has to be portrayed thru that one character's eyes and thoughts but I like it coz it really lets you take your readers right into your character's thoughts and emotions and feelings. I'd go deeper into your character's thoughts and sensations and feelings but that's just me and the way I write. Maybe a bit more dialog for the two women?

 

[Darkniciad]

An average performance for me in Mature with that type of story is around 60k views and 600 votes, with 100k and 1k votes being far from unusual.

Of course, it's been a while. We'll see what happens late next week, because I have exactly that type of story back from editing and ready to submit.

 

[ChloeTzang]

An average performance for me in Mature with that type of story is around 60k views and 600 votes, with 100k and 1k votes being far from unusual.

Of course, it's been a while. We'll see what happens late next week, because I have exactly that type of story back from editing and ready to submit.

Love to see what your next one in Mature gets by way of views. My "The Wolf with the Red Roses" is at 27,800 views with 519 votes and it's been up since the end of January 2017 so there for roughly 3 months now.

 

[Darkniciad]

That's a damn fine vote to view ratio you've got going there. If it was me, I wouldn't give half a rat's behind about the view total being below my average when it's getting that kind of engagement.

Love to see what your next one in Mature gets by way of views. My "The Wolf with the Red Roses" is at 27,800 views with 519 votes and it's been up since the end of January 2017 so there for roughly 3 months now.

 

[StrangeTamer]

Welcome to the weird and wonderful world outside of Sci-Fi

If you've only written in that category ( and Non Human or Erotic Horror ) it can be a bit of a system shock when the views start rolling in.

Post an age-difference story in Mature or a story in Incest and you'll be even more bowled over by the speed at which those numbers tick up.

I knew the other categories moved faster but I didn't think they moved this fast lol. I could write in Mature but I don't think I could write in Incest, it just doesn't appeal to me, but I might try it some day.

 

[StrangeTamer]

I wrote a comment on your story. I think your choice of first person was appropriate for this category of story, just as third person, I think, usually is the best point of view for a sci fi/fantasy story. My question was with your choice of the person from whose point of view the story was told. If you are going to tell a story about a threesome from the first person point of view, pick the person who has the greatest level of conflict, tension, and nervousness about the encounter. In your story that person appeared to be Sheryl, rather than the husband.

Thank you for your comment. Your right, looking back at it I should have written it from Sheryl's point of view, that would have been a better story, I will have to remember this for next time. Thanks for letting me know about the tense-shifting, I wasn't even aware of it, I will work on that. Maybe I'll rewrite the story sometime in Sheryl's POV as an exercise, and call it A Magical Night : Sheryl's POV.

 

[StrangeTamer]

Well, I took a look and liked it. First person as opposed to third can be a bit of a challenge coz everything has to be portrayed thru that one character's eyes and thoughts but I like it coz it really lets you take your readers right into your character's thoughts and emotions and feelings. I'd go deeper into your character's thoughts and sensations and feelings but that's just me and the way I write. Maybe a bit more dialog for the two women?

Thank you for looking at it, and I'm honored that you liked it . That was one of challenging things I found with first person, staying with one persons perspective. You're also right I need to go deeper into my character's thoughts and feelings, and try to make the story more emotional. Lol, yes this story wasn't much for dialog.

 

[StrangeTamer]

An average performance for me in Mature with that type of story is around 60k views and 600 votes, with 100k and 1k votes being far from unusual.

Of course, it's been a while. We'll see what happens late next week, because I have exactly that type of story back from editing and ready to submit.

Good luck with your story, I'll try to keep an eye out for it and give it a read.

 

[My I]

I work out of my comfort zone so much I don't know what IS my comfort zone anymore.I have written 1st person, 3rd person and what I had always called 2nd person but found out I was wrong. (Writing first person perspective from the viewpoint of someone other than the main character. Like the Sherlock Holmes stories)

I have written Male and Female characters. (Yes including Debbie is is as far from my own personality as you can get) I have written both in first person. You want to work out of your comfort zone? Try writing a 20 something, ditzy dumb blonde, nympho, stripper girl in first person. BTW: I'm a 54 yr old man with a 161 IQ.

I have written sweet romantic interludes, bawdy bar tales and just plain raunchy troke material. I've written Sci-Fi, Horror, BDSM, First time, Lesbian, Erotic Couplings and Humor and Satire.

Everything you write differently will make you a better writer overall. And by writing in different categories you will find followers in each. Bigger fan base, more views, more votes.... You get the picture.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Thank you for looking at it, and I'm honored that you liked it . That was one of challenging things I found with first person, staying with one persons perspective. You're also right I need to go deeper into my character's thoughts and feelings, and try to make the story more emotional. Lol, yes this story wasn't much for dialog.

I take each story I've written and then for the next one I try and focus on one thing to improve. For a long time I worked on dialog and characterization. Now I'm a lot more focused on actual plotting coz my early stories had next to none or it was just baaaaaad. My advice is just take one aspect of your writing at a time and focus on that for the next story until you're happy with it and then look for the next thing to step up. That's kind of my approach anyhow.

it's just an ongoing thing of you want to improve and I'm always reading to see how popular authors do things well (or badly, sometimes)

 

[Kantarii]

I write a lot in first person. I find it rather intriguing to express to the reader the thoughts going through the main character's mind ontop of my interest in visualizing myself in the story I'm telling to those that read it.

I tried my hand at writing in 3rd person, but it was a bit hard for me. Keep practicing! One of the hardest things I seen myself to over come with writing in 1st person is avoiding starting every sentence with "I". Kant

 

[Areala-chan]

I love first-person. If you do it right, you can completely absorb a reader in one character. First-person, present-tense is, in my opinion, the most intimate setting for a story. It gives you an immediacy and tightness of focus you don't get with other perspectives.

That said, most of the negative comments I've received on stories are about tense and viewpoint, so people won't hesitate to let you know what they don't like. If you haven't gotten any comments like that, then you probably did fine.

 

[ElectricBlue]

I love first-person. If you do it right, you can completely absorb a reader in one character. First-person, present-tense is, in my opinion, the most intimate setting for a story. It gives you an immediacy and tightness of focus you don't get with other perspectives.

Yes, this ^^^^ You can dig in deep, so deep. A writer here complimented me by saying, good god, you get so intimate, I just want to leave and close the door.

I found with one of my stories, written first person pov, that the sex scenes shifted into present tense as I wrote deep into the intimate moment, then shifted back to past tense as the narrative resumed. I didn't even register I was doing it, until someone pointed it out to me. I pay more attention to that now and catch it on edit, but still find it happens occasionally.

It usually means I've fallen in love with the other character, and just want to be with her, right now!

 

[RejectReality]

Views 34.9k
4.70 734 votes 11 comments 56 Favorites

The view count is half the norm, but considering it released on a Sunday, I expected it to be worse.

In complete contrast, all the other numbers hit my averages. Again, considering it came out on a Sunday, I consider that a win. Also has that awesome vote to view ratio.

Love to see what your next one in Mature gets by way of views. My "The Wolf with the Red Roses" is at 27,800 views with 519 votes and it's been up since the end of January 2017 so there for roughly 3 months now.

 

[PurpleSatin]

I'm a writer by nature but haven't yet dived into the realm of literotica just yet but I've read a lot of stories mostly in the brother sister incest sex area and found it to be super hot. I don't know, I just enjoy reading other's stories more than writing my own. But I'll probably write one soon